TTC after recurrent miscarriage - thread 3

That's great news! Have been checking all morning to see if there's been an update! I measured 6+4 too at my first scan! Was also my first good scan x

Gawd - sorry. I’m always feel I write too much!

Ahhh - thank you ladies! I’m back now. I had a 10.30 appointment and they were 30 minutes running over, I was so, so anxious waiting.

All is well so far - I’m measuring 6+4 which is 4 days ahead! The sonographer did sternly remind me that at this early stage it can be -/+ 5 days so to keep LMP until dating scan.

It was so tense lying there, until she started clicking and said everything looked normal for size. I did start crying from relief.

I’m hoping it will put my mind at ease for a while. I’ve never had a scan this early @labmum and I’m painfully aware it’s a snapshot of that day! But it’s a step in the right direction.

Brief history for new joiners:

Jan: mmc 7 weeks, but only found out at 12 week scan. Medical management.

April: 5 weeks/chem - no fetal pole found

June: Got to 8 weeks, no bleeding. Went for private ‘reassurance’ scan (after midwife wouldn't refer me to EPAU) to only to find no heartbeat. Stopped growing at 6 weeks. MVA for resolving that.

August: Another chem/5 week mc. No scan just bloods.

November: hb at 6+4!

It’s been quite a hellish year, and there’s been some awful low points. I’m currently having counselling sessions every 2 weeks.

Reading back I think ‘why I am doing this again, I’m insane’.

I’ve an hour break before my mum drops my DD home. I’m shattered!

Good luck today @curlytwirlytwos will be thinking of you and have everything crossed. Hope you don't have to wait too long for your appointment.

@curlytwirlytwosgood luck today. Try to stay calm, and if you didn't DTD in FW try not to worry if the dates don't match up. Have you had early scans before? Have your miscarriages all been before this point? Hopefully today can provide reassurance for you (for me it never did as I always miscarried later so it always felt like a pointless exercise).

6 week scan tomorrow morning - I’m bricking it. I’ve successfully spent the last 2 hours reading old forums and googling recurrent miscarriage stories/statistics/data. You name it. Why have I done this to myself?

I feel like absolute crap, I’ve convinced myself that there is nothing in there and that the outcome is inevitable.

I wish we’d taken a longer break in ttcing. I’m really not ready for this.....

Well done @Laney79 it must have been hard, I'm sure your friend really appreciated the support though x
I've woken up to feeling super broody! It seems every advert is of a snuggly new baby and it's driving me a bit mad

Baby showers can be horrible. I had one and 2 baby bombs on the same day in September. My friend and I had same due date too. Nice to still go especially when it's a close friend though.

You did really well @Laney79 baby showers can be hard, and a bit raw! I’ve had to do it, my cousin had the audacity to have practically the same EDD from one of my mmc AND have a baby shower!! That was very tough, but I got through it - the same as you today!

We CAN manage 💪 after all it’s noones fault really that we suffer rmc, it’s just so desperately unfair.

Your friend sounds like she deserves one after her late mmc but I personally wouldn’t have one....

Thanks @Labmum and @norbert23 it was ok-couple of moments, one when one lass (who I've not met before) was talking about her other half and getting the snip and how they are waiting for a few years until she's 40 as that'd be too old for them to have another baby...that got me a bit. She wasn't to know my age/circumstance but it did take the wind out of me a bit. Other was when we got given a newborn baby grow to draw on -and I sat there thinking I should have lots of these of my own as bean would be just over a week old now.

But I did it, and I didn't cry. Lovely to see my mate and her bump though.

Hope the baby shower went ok @Laney79. I hate them and refuse to go to them or have one of my own.

Good luck @Laney79 xxx

Wish me luck ladies. I'm just about to go to a baby shower for a good friend of mine. She said I didn't have to go but felt I should be there. Im really happy for her, she's been through hell (lost her third-MMC discovered at 19 weeks, but died 16 weeks) and she's one of my best mates. Its just so hard-have to get through it without crying. I can't stop thinking I should have a newborn or a little bump of my own. Xxx

Thanks for all the suggestions! Plenty to watch now! I've decided to drive up to my mum's this morning to stay for a couple of days. Hate being home alone. It doesn't help that we live in the middle of nowhere too!
@Laney79 hopefully your cycle will return to normal soon. Mine has been different each time. Took months to get AF first time then I conceived straight away after 2nd mc. I can't remember how long it took to get AF after 3rd as we had a break from trying though remember bleeding/spotting for a long time.
I seem to have horrendous diarrhoea every morning. Sorry for tmi. I'm wondering if it's the pregnacare/cyclogest. Apart from one episode in evening it's been every morning since about week 6. Anyone else experienced this?

It took me about 6 weeks to get AF after mmc 2 @Laney79 and I didn’t get a positive OPK in that time either!!!

I never got the hang of opk tbh, so that might just be me!

I'm also watching Sabrina! It's ace!

Box sets...if you have Netflix orange is the new black is good as is designated survivor and suits. I enjoyed the good wife, and prison break. Adore the west wing, ER, desperate housewives and House.

I'm still waiting for first AF since losing bow. Stopped bleeding 6/10, negative test 14/10, had 7 days of brown Cm/spotting 21-27/10...no sign of a positive opk so who knows what my stupid body is doing now! I just want to know where I am so we can get back to trying again properly. Just over three weeks until my consultant appt and my blood results.

I’ve already watched the 1st two episodes of Sabrina! It’s very different from when we were younger (I loved it too..) but still pure escapism for you @hopefulforarainbow! Ahhh - I’d love a boxset day!
I also started the witches discovery on Sky as well, which was alright - a mix of Twilight, Harry Potter, and LOTR and any other fantasy you can think of. Good distraction.
I LOVED Desperate Housewives though - proper comfort tv!

Great suggestions from everyone else though - that’s my winter viewing sorted, lol!

Still tired and slightly nauseous here, been here sooooooo many times before. But putting it to the back of my mind as best I can... :-(

There's the station 19 spin off series from Grey's that's quite good. Only 10 eps though so not much to get going on. I also liked Once Upon a Time on Netflix. Pretty easy watching. And 13 reasons why was great but not one to watch if you're after light-hearted. I also LOVED bones, and Buffy. Classics!

Hi @Miami81. Nice to hear from you. Have been watching the good doctor. Started for the people but I struggled to get in to it. How are you doing? Well I hope.

@Labmum sounds like we're in to the same kind of stuff. Greys is my all time fave. I'm up to date with it and have re watched it all too! I've watched killing eve and the bodyguard. Big little lies was good. I've got a few episodes of the affair left to watch. Might watch desperate housewives or something again!

@hopeful, oh wow, that's tough I find time always drags when DH is away. He's been away this week and I've had a nightmare time with DS being ill. Very ready for him to get home tonight, I suspect I'll just dissolve into tears at the sight of him.
Box set wise there's loads......what sort of stuff are you into? I'm half way through Killing Eve at the moment and really enjoying it. The bodyguard was apparently good too, both on iplayer.
Netflix-I quite fancy watching the new sabrina series just for nostalgias sake as I used to love it as a kid.
Sky-Big Little Lies was fab and second season is coming soon.
Crime dramas - Line of duty
Medical dramas - Greys (love it and a LOT to go at with it being on its 20th season or something crazy like that!)

Thanks @Labmum. Don't feel ready for that forum yet! I'm terrified about the next scan. Counting down the days. Less than 2 weeks now. Hubby is away for 10 days today for work so when he's home it'll just be a couple of days away. I hate it when he's away. Debating on whether I should go to my mum's for a couple of days but its a 2 1/2hr drive each way. I've been feeling really tired too @curly. Not sure if the nausea is nerves or pregnancy related also. I need to find some box sets/series to watch when hubby is away. Any recommendations?

Ahhh - thanks for the tip @labmum, I rushed to check my vitamins when I got home today, and thankfully no vitamin A - phew. I didn’t even think about it! Which sounds really silly. Also thank you for the extra folic acid tip too, if things go well next week I’ll follow it up.

Thank you so much.

I the plunge and bought pregnacare today as well, I popped out a weeks worth and put them in the normal pot. I know it sounds silly, but I don’t want be a ‘pregnant’ woman just yet.

I’m feeling tired to the bone, exhausted in a way that I can’t remember, I’ve mild nausea but I think it’s nerves!