TTC after recurrent miscarriage - thread 3

Has AF showed up @Lauraliverpool?

I thought I was starting to miscarry last night but turns out it was just a tiny but of brown spotting. I was slightly relieved when I thought it was the start of mc as I've been worried about what management to go with this time after I have the scan tomorrow. I've had 2 natural miscarriages and 2 surgical which was good for testing however this time I didn't think there was going to be anything to test so was planning to discuss taking the medication....please could you let me know your opinions and experiences on medical management? Xx

I've decided if af does show up, I'm going back to my clear blue monitor. X

@oddsbobbins I'm thinking af, been bit more brown on the tissue and my back is aching more, I'm hoping it's not af, was going to try and hold out til wed or Sunday to test. Xx

Thanks everyone, I'm currently fluctuating between hopeful and terrified. I actually have a scan tomorrow to see what my various fibroids are up to in a non-pregnant state (oops!), but I'm wondering if there will be anything to see?

@MrsPMA I don't really know how many dpo I am, I have irregular cycles and don't track ov closely, but I'm thinking around 11 dpo. How about you?

Thinking of you waiting for your scans @bean and @Munchies, being in limbo is the worst.

Thanks @Lauraliverpool, I'm feeling ok, had non-stop indigestion for about 10 days now which was a bit of a clue, but that's all for the moment. Hope you have the early signs of a BFP, when are you planning to test?

@oddsbobbins congratulations,how are you feeling? Xx

@Munchies89 I have lower backache and lower tummy ache, sore boobs up til now no af, I've roughly worked out it could be wed. How are you? Xx

@Munchies it's such a difficult time for you, the waiting in limbo is awful. Got everything crossed for Monday! Understand needing to take a break, do what you need to to get through this next week but know we're here if you need us.

@oddbobbins congratulations, hope all goes well for you this time. If you contact your EPU they should be able to arrange an early scan for you.

@MissPMA enjoy your weekend (you had far too much wine last night and are feeling really ropey aren't you so better just have an orange juice ). And definitely kick up a fuss through PALS about your referral, they're really helpful. After my first MC (discovered at 12 week scan) the hospital I was at was crap, was told I had to come back 4 days later as they has no sonographers free to confirm MC, I miscarried naturally whilst waiting for that scan, was offered no follow up, no scan 2 weeks later to check all had come away. I bled heavily for 6 weeks and kept ringing and they just said "oh it's normal"! My cycles were really off afterwards and 6 months later I'd still not conceived again so I complained through PALS. They gave me a gynae scan to check everything out. Needless to say I never went back to that hospital for maternity services again (even though I work there)!

Sorry ladies I haven't been on here as much since my last scan but still thinking of you all and looking forward to hearing about more BFP and scans.

Congratulations @MissPMA and @Oddsbobbins we are here with you every step of the way. How frustrating about the referral @MissPMA.

@LabMum hey hun wow 16 weeks already. So good to hear everything is going well. I've been pretty tearful since the last scan and want to get the next week over with so we can put our name down for IVF. Scan and plan will be on Monday.

@Hopefulforourrainbow have an absolutely amazing holiday! Most gorgeous place in the world.

@AnnelovesGilbert that's hilarious about your DSS! Love childrens curiosity and innocence.

@Lauraliverpool did AF show up?

@bean hope you're doing okay and your next scan comes around quickly x

Oh @oddsbobbins that’s promising news but I totally get the conflict of feelings, how many dpo are you?

Thanks @labmum and @bean for your responses, it was much appreciated yesterday after not getting anything from rmc. if things stay put over the weekend I’m going to call EPU on Monday.

I hope everyone’s having a good weekend, we’ve got a busy one which will be good to keep our minds off things although we do have a pub lunch tomorrow with friends where I’ll have to think of an excuse not to drink

Have an amazing holiday hopeful! Sunshine and wine sound like very good things.

I’ve been on a mini-break with DH, so a belated hopeful congratulations MissPMA. I got a rather tentative but definitely there according to DH BFP this morning. Really not sure how to think about it. There’s a part of me that just wants to get mc 3 over and done with so I can get a rmc referral, but then that’s a terrible thing to think when getting such potentially good news.

Thank you! So excited now! Chilling at airport hotel with a large glass of wine!
Aww that's a lovely way to explain things up the kids @Anne. Hope you're having a lovely weekend. I would also love to donate @Miami. Do you have a just giving page? Sending lots of love to you all. Will check in while away to see how you're all doing.

@MissPMA a GP can prescribe high dose (5mg) folic acid so that might be worth looking into? I took 75mg aspirin myself just over the counter but that's up to you. If you've had spotting already you may not want to.
You should maybe contact PALS about them losing your referral. They may be able to advocate for you being seen now. Could you look online at their policy for recurrent miscarriage to see if the closer monitoring is something they offer as you should be eligible for that at least.

My consultant says no aspirin until you’ve seen a heartbeat on scan.
I’m empirically on clexane too although no clotting problem found.
I think that’s really poor. I’m being seen weekly by my consultant because of or previous losses.

So I called rmc and am glad I did as they had lost my referral 😡 but I’m now in the system although they’ve said I’ll get an appointment for January which feels a loooong time away, they also said that even though I’m pregnant I won’t be seen now as they wouldn’t be able to prescribe anything.
The only thing different I’m doing this time is taking pregnacare max, The gp’s never mentioned aspirin before but I’m willing to throw anything at it, does anyone have any recommendations of what specifically to take? Any drawbacks to it?

@Anne, its so lovely they're excited! I'm glad DS isn't old enough for the birds and bees aspect of things. Was awkward enough when pregnant with DS and my little cousin asking me how babies are made! I just fobbed her off saying "oh I think you may need to ask Mummy and Daddy that one".......her Dad went very pale at that point!

@beanhunter glad its easing off. Got everything crossed for you!

@MissPMA definitely worth giving them a ring, part of the treatment for RMC is supportive antenatal care (bizarrely has a more positive outcome than cyclogest) so they arranged for me to have scans every 2 weeks until my 12 week scan. My scan yesterday at 16 weeks was through them too, it was my 5th scan so far this pregnancy and there's 3 more booked in. Costing me a fortune in parking charges!

@ruana hope the wedding goes ok, I head similar earlier this year and it was tough, there was lots of free booze though so I drowned my sorrows instead! Not really advised but do what you have to to get through it.

Don’t say sorry! Always nice to have people sending good vibes, thank you xx

The walk sounds amazing, I’d love to donate if you wouldn’t mind sending details. PM me if you want to. What a lovely friend. Will you get to go along for the send off or to meet them at the finish?

Relief the spotting’s stopped. You hear about it happening but I honestly had no idea how many people bleed apparently for no reason and everything’s fine. Can’t get my head around it.

DH and ex lost a baby before they had my DSC so they know it can happen and we just said we know they’re old enough to understand and be grown up about it. I still haven’t even told my dad or brothers as I’m not ready for their hope/fear reactions so having innocent children in the loop feels insane... But as a SM I’d always worried a bit about how they’d feel even though they’ve said they want one so it’s very special how happy they are, even if I now feel immense pressure to actually produce a baby.

Having recently got to grips with the birds and bees, when I popped out to give DH a chance to have a bit of time with them to go through any questions or thoughts, DSS asked DH how the baby got in me...

DSS: Daddy, did you [slightly obscene hand gestures]. DH: oh wow, um well yes. DSS: how does it even fit?! DH: it just does. DSS: does it hurt? DH: no. DSS: okay cool.

DSS starts jumping up and down saying he’s going to be a big brother. DH walks away bright red and shaking slightly

Bloody kids.

@ruanna I know what you mean, we decided to crack on as it will be such a long wait till our rmc appointment comes through and I think i wanted to feel like I was doing something, I felt very positive for the first part of the month but since my fertile window passed just full of gloom for the next bit. I’m sorry to hear about your losses, i hope the wedding goes well this weekend, I’m sure it will be difficult but I hope you can also enjoy it.
@hopeful I am so pleased you finally got your period, I hope you have an absolutely amazing holiday!
Happy 12 weeks @anne, that’s lovely the kids are so excited but must put a hell of a lot of pressure on you when you have so much already!
@labmum wow 16 weeks, I’m glad to hear the sickness is subsiding, how are you planning on making your announcement? That’s useful to hear of your success with rmc, I’ve not called them or anyone as I figured it was probably pointless, the spotting turned red yesterday although back to brown today and is extremely light. So maybe I’ll give them a call anyway. We’re feeling a bit glum about things really, DH had a cancer scare over the summer which thankfully came back clear but yesterday the gp mentioned that he has varicole, she was very dismissive of him when he asked if it could be causing the miscarriages saying there was clearly no problem with his sperm when I’ve been pregnant so many times, but after looking it online it appears it is linked to recurrent miscarriage, hmmm....

Feel like af is on the way, I hope not, my mum spoke to a midwife yesterday in the health centre where she works and explained everything and she recommended I do a test in ten days, have done a couple which have been negative, just going to have to distract myself till next Sunday! Hope you're all ok. Xx

Still spotting but mostly brown so hoping that’s just residual stuff and it’s ok. Trying not to get attached.
My daughter has clocked im being sick and tired again like last summer. Last summer she only knew after the mc so we wanted to wait again but she’s now asked twice. We’ve dodged the question so far.

Such great news lab, what a relief for you. Enjoy the milestones and have a lovely family meet up.

How are you miami? How’ve you been feeling? Are you finding jabbing okay?

Bin off the OPK while you’re away hopeful and enjoy cocktails and shagging and sun and sea and sand. Hope you have the BEST time.

I hope the wedding is lovely ruanna We’ve all been there, some days it seems everyone’s falling at the drop of a hat and 9 months later they have a baby in their arms and probably can’t even imagine it’s not that easy for everyone. Look after yourself.

How are you doing pma? So tempting to just pretend it’s not happening on one level I know but get the support you can if you think it will be helpful. Go at your own pace. How did DP take the news?!

Sending love to you FMU. You know we’re all here for you, anytime.

Sending love to everyone. Don’t know where I’d be without you all.

Thinking of you all too but I’m away on holiday and no appointments or anything happening, sorry if I got a date wrong. 12 weeks on the nose today. Got my screening scan Wednesday will be 12+5.

Feeling a bit wobbly as just before we came away we got busted by the kids (my step kids) and had to fess up. They’re absolutely over the moon and we’ve had several chats about how it’s very exciting but sometimes babies get poorly and don’t get to born which hopefully won’t be the case but we were planning to wait till we’d seen the doctor next week and were going to tell them when we knew the baby was alright. Tricky balance as they’ve been asking for a sibling for years and we want them to enjoy being excited but the idea of it going wrong and putting them through it as well is just too awful.

They named it on the spot which we wanted to avoid and DSD even snuck off and bought it a teddy yesterday... It’s all a bit much tbh. We’d wanted to get to 16 weeks before saying anything but my progesterone belly has been impossible to hide

@beanhunter how are you doing? Did the bleeding stop again after your scan?

Good luck @AnneLovesGilbert!

How are you @Miami81?

Enjoy your holiday @hopefulforourrainbow! Sun and cocktails sound amazing!

Hope all is well with you @MissPMA. I was also waiting for my RMC appointment when I fell this time and I just gave them a ring and they saw me straight away and gave me high dose folic acid and cyclogest. Got everything crossed for you! Are you going to anything different this time off your own back like aspirin?

How are you doing @Munchies?

I'm 16 weeks now, had a consultant appointment yesterday with a quick scan showing all is fine in there which is reassuring to know as my sickness is finally dying down. Starting to show now so think the cat will be let out the bag at a family gathering this weekend so its nice to get the reassurance before that. Now I can start worrying about the 20 week scan!

Sorry I had completely forgotten. Thanks for the reminder @Miami. Good luck @Anne xx