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Original poster

Staying Sane - Positivity during TTC journey

507 replies

KnitKitty · 13/06/2018 18:26

Hi ladies,

So, TTC is an anxious and sometimes heartbreaking time and is just a constant roller-coaster of emotions:
Some of us have been trying for a long, long time and just feeling like it will never happen.
Some of us are trying after a previous pregnancy loss.
Some of us aren't seeing eye-to-eye with OHs.
Some of us don't have an OH to lean on and are going through it alone.
Some of us are trying with fertility treatment.
Some of us are trying for our first, and some our fourth
Some of us want to be trying but can't yet for one reason or another.
Some of us are dealing with health issues which may affect fertility or mental health.
And some of us are about to, or have just started trying and might be worrying about how long it will take or if this or that will effect fertility etc etc...

It's just not the funnest journey to be on and I thought we could do with a thread just for positive messages and thoughts.

SO, no negative messages on this thread, but feel free to post:
A positive mantra or affirmation you use or think someone else could use
An idea of how to relax or pass the TTW time
A nice thing that happened to you recently
A success story despite the odds
A picture or word of hope (rainbow pictures most welcome)
A positive message to those who are going through one of the above scenarios at the moment even if you're not on the same journey as they are right now
A nice/positive quote you've read or heard
Or something which brightened up your day

The idea is that anyone having a wobble for whatever reason can come here and soak up some positive energy to help them feel better.

I'll go first:
A mantra I have been repeating to myself at the moment is "Good things happen to me. I accept miracles in my life."

A word of hope for anyone thinking of coming off the pill or who has just come off the pill and who has a history of endometriosis; I have suffered with endo in the past and was very worried that the moment I stopped taking the pill I would get all clogged up with endo again, but I conceived in the second month after coming off the pill and I have a colleague whose wife conceived two children (one the first month after coming off the pill, the second the third month after the pill) without a problem even though she has endo too.

Right, who's with me? Any more positive stuff to share anyone?

OP posts:
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VenusStarr · 03/08/2018 15:02

I'm 10dpo too @Chanel05, ugh, feeling really flat today. Might have a lie down, finished my training early. Good news is I passed my assessment today.

CookieWaffle · 03/08/2018 09:05

Ahh it's torture isn't it @VenusStarr,makr sure you havr a glass of something nice tomorrow xx

There's still time @Chanel05! xx

Chanel05 · 03/08/2018 08:55

10dpo bfn with a frer. As expected!

@ChaosMoon congratulations! What fabulous news!!

@KnitKitty sorry to hear about your mc. I hope you get some good news soon. When are you planning to test?

@VenusStarr it’s got to be your time soon then! Hopefully this cycle!

VenusStarr · 03/08/2018 08:54

Thank you, I'm finding it tough too @CookieWaffle, bfn this morning. I have no more tests, we're at a wedding tomorrow so am going to make sure I enjoy it :) xx

CookieWaffle · 03/08/2018 08:30

Ahh I'm so excited for you @ChaosMoon, good luck keeping your cool today! Grin

Well one positive in our house today, my fishies had babies so I'm glad at least someone in this house can get pregnant! We got 4 tiny little things swimming around this morning. They're so cute :)

ChaosMoon · 03/08/2018 08:23

Thank you @VenusStar and @KnitKitty! Yes, this will be my first. It's a Boots digital. For some reason I wanted to save my FRERs in case I needed them later. Can't fathom the logic of that now... 😂

That's great news KnitKitty well done. It's nice to remember than life can throw all sorts of good things our way.

I'm so glad I get to share this with you all, sunshine ladies. I think I'd go a bit nuts keeping it to myself. Don't know how I'm going to be a normal person today. We've spent all this time practicing being positive, I forgot to practice being sensible.

CookieWaffle · 03/08/2018 07:54

@KnitKitty that's lovely feedback from work, it's really nice to be recognised at work. We spend so much time there and work so hard it's nice to be appreciated. I hope you get that job if it comes around!

Original poster
KnitKitty · 03/08/2018 07:31

ChaosMoon Congratulations!!! What a wonderful thing to see first thing in the morning. (I mean for me, but even more so for you!!!!!!) I am so happy for you. I'm glad the waiting paid off!
Out of curiosity what brand of test is that? I don't recognise it.
I can't remember, are you TTC no.1?

I have my fingers crossed for you both VenusStar and CookieWaffle... Let's go for the hat trick!!

I'm fine thanks Venus. Feeling very calm. Since I've no idea where in my cycle I am now I'm on forced wait-and-see mode and it's actually quite relaxing.

I had some potentially good news at work yesterday. One of my managers spoke to a higher-up and mentioned they thought I'd be interested in a promotion when the job arises. The higher-up agreed that I'd be a good person for it as they said I seemed very 'level-headed' and hard-working. Even if the promotion doesn't manifest, it's nice to have got that feedback. Smile

OP posts:
CookieWaffle · 03/08/2018 06:57

@VenusStarr FF seems to think I'm due Thursday and I'm 7dpo today. Still having cramps and backache and finding this TWW pretty tough! Enjoy your weekend with DH xx

CookieWaffle · 03/08/2018 06:52

Oh bless him. I love how they can fall asleep even after the most exciting of news. Mine fell straight to sleep after proposing!

I've been on Amazon already for some more FRERs...

VenusStarr · 03/08/2018 06:51

That's wonderful news @ChaosMoon, very definitely positive!! 🎉 so happy for you :)

When are you due @CookieWaffle? I'm due sometime between Sunday and Tuesday.

Sorry @Chanel05, noticed you asked me how long we'd been trying, been off the pill since December. No good news yet. Haven't had many symptoms this tww, got some cramps this morning.

How are you @KnitKitty? I really like what you said about treating your body as a friend. It makes so much sense, work together not against each other :)

So happy it's Friday! It's felt like a long week but finally going to get some quality time with dh.

ChaosMoon · 03/08/2018 06:46

I have. Poor boy had about 3 hours sleep last night and he still managed to convey all the right emotions and give all the hugs. He also asked me to tell him again tonight before falling back to sleep. I'm ok with that moment. 😁

I bet you are! It's funny, I was disappointed not to test yesterday and the day before but I'm glad I didn't now. Good luck holding out - and good luck if you don't. 😊 As long as you're enjoying the ride, its all good. Sending lots of baby dust.

CookieWaffle · 03/08/2018 06:30

@ChaosMoon there's definitely no 'not' there. That's a very BFP! Have you told him yet? How has he taken it?

Oh wow I'm so desperate to test now. I don't think I'll make it through the weekend!

ChaosMoon · 03/08/2018 06:18

Thank you so much @CookieWaffle! It's a good job I woke up early (not on purpose) and tested then - I can't stop starring at it. I keep worrying that I've misread it. 😊

CookieWaffle · 03/08/2018 06:06

Ahhhh @ChaosMoon I'm so happy for you!! Congratulations!! Ohh that's so exciting!! xxx

ChaosMoon · 03/08/2018 05:52

So here's my happy thought for today. I can't stop shaking.

Staying Sane - Positivity during TTC journey
ChaosMoon · 02/08/2018 22:36

So I've just realised I deleted my reply earlier rather than pressing send. Oops!

@CookieWaffle were going to see Julie. I don't know anything about it, but I like going in without any expectations. Swimming today must have been glorious!

That sounds promising @KnitKitty. I have everything crossed for you. And everyone else. Xx

Original poster
KnitKitty · 02/08/2018 21:54

Chanel05 it does feel so liberating not being on the pill, doesn't it? I much prefer not being; I feel more me. I was on the pill for a long, long time too before December. As I said, the first month I was all over the place with hormones, but I actually got pregnant the month after (sadly it wasn't meant to be). Since MC I feel like my body is just needing some more time to get itself sorted out.

I think it's really important to build up a good relationship with your body and treat it as a good friend rather than an enemy.
I can totally understand why some people on MN talk about resenting their bodies for not getting pregnant quickly or causing problems; it is hard. But your body is going through the same emotions as your mind and we need to be kind to ourselves.

I like to think me and my ovary and womb are all in this together and when I get a BFN or when I lost my baby I feel sorry for my womb and ovary as much as for myself.

So the bleeding this morning was a false alarm, I believe it was my cervix bleeding. So, still not AF. Ho hum!

OP posts:
Chanel05 · 02/08/2018 13:03

@KintKitty thanks for the advice :) good idea on the symptom spotting diary, I do like to record things down so may give this a try. I’ve put bits into my app but don’t tend to go through it really. I was on the pill for 12 years and only came off in June so I suspect my body is wondering what on Earth is going on. I feel quite liberated actually not putting hormones into my body!

Original poster
KnitKitty · 02/08/2018 11:11

Hi Chanel05 congratulations on starting your TTC journey! How exciting!!!
Were you on the pill or injections or anything before now?
Remember it often takes a few months for your body to right itself after a lot of forms of contraception, so giving it time to get into a natural rhythm is probably a good idea right now.
I came off the pill at the beginning of December and made getting to know my cycles my priority rather than putting too much pressure on TTC straight away as I'd read all the statistics about 1-2 years being normal to fall pregnant etc...
Of course that didn't stop me symptom spotting at every little thing and actually my first month off the pill was my worst for this. I think with my hormones fluctuating so much was giving me a lot of false hope. Bloated, feeling sick, random pains things...
As ChaosMoon said, trying not to symptom spot doesn't work, it's impossible not to (and it is kind of fun?). I just started making a diary of everything I noticed so I could learn about my body and get to know its cycles, and thought, if any of it turns out to be actual symptoms I can look back on it and think "ahh! that's what that was!"

CookieWaffle I'm jealous of all the chocolate and snacks. I don't start work til 12 today so I'm just having a little more relaxation time before setting off.

Theatre and swimming both sounds lovely! Have fun ladies!

Our visitors left earlier after a wonderful cooked breakfast courtesy of OH. Was lovely to see them and we had fun playing Mario Tennis. (Big kids).
I think AF may have arrived. OH and I took the opportunity to be alone again to DTD and it seems to have set something off... However my cervix does bleed on occasion so just waiting to see which it is.

OP posts:
CookieWaffle · 02/08/2018 10:00

Oooh what you gonna see @ChaosMoon? I love a good show but OH isn't really into them.

We're gonna go for a nice swim later. And it's a lovely. sunny day today!

ChaosMoon · 02/08/2018 08:56

Sat it often enough @Chanel05 and you'll start to believe it! Do you have fun plans to distract yourself?

DH had booked us theatre tickets for tomorrow, so it's nice to have that to look forward to if af does arrive today.

Chanel05 · 01/08/2018 22:38

@ChaosMoon fx that af doesn’t make an unwanted appearance!! I’m off work at the minute on annual leave and I’m possibly having too much time to think as I’m not occupied all day. I’m excited to do a test as it will be my first one ever so I’m just trying to think that in itself is an exciting milestone, regardless of the outcome. Do I sound convincing yet? Grin

@CookieWaffle you are so right! I’m usually so laid back in life. I’ve clearly found my limits!

@VenusStarr that’s very true! Are you having any symptoms? How long have you been ttc?

VenusStarr · 01/08/2018 21:49

Ah thank you @ChaosMoon he is, I'm very lucky :) if af arrives, it's OK to have a wobble Flowers

Due between Sunday and Tuesday @Chanel05, I'm looking forward to a new cycle. It's great to be able to pop in here and feel supported by people who understand.

I had similar yesterday @CookieWaffle, an annoying low humming sound in the office, couldn't locate it but it was so distracting!

CookieWaffle · 01/08/2018 20:52

It's a whole new world @Chanel05! You think you knew yourself and then suddenly you don't!

One of the managers was walking weirdly around our office the other day, we all looked at him strangely until I asked what's up. He said he'd been trying to find the location of the beeping noise. What beeping noise?? Oh I hear it now... oh god now this is annoying me.... Funny how you suddenly start noticing things!

Just done our tesco shop and my enabler OH helped me bring home chocolate and snacks for my working at home day tomorrow :) what a shame.

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