Over 40 ttc - summer baby dust for me!

Critter how many went went to blastocyst stage? All of them?

Lots of reasons really. DH doesn’t want to. I don’t. We have 2 DC already and it’d be too much disruption to our lives and work. We live miles away from a centre that does it. We’ve no money. It feels greedy seeing as we’ve got two already. I don’t know. Just doesn’t feel right for us...

Exciting! Good luck!

@Alibaba2 - yes if everything continues to plan transfer is at 1.30 tomorrow.

Critter - will they transfer tomorrow? Fingers crossed for you x

@Littlemimosa - yes tomorrow is the big day, thank you for asking 😊 - embies were looking strong enough for a 5 day transfer so I’m happy with that and very nervous about tomorrow. Also back to work on a Thursday morning so need to try to keep the stress levels down afterwards! So sorry to hear you’re feeling so down about TTC - do you mind If I ask why you’ve decided not to consider IVF? It’s definitely not an easy journey but the mere fact of doing something to feel a little more in control has been very beneficial to me psychologically. We Had an IVF BFP on the infertility board this morning which gives me hope 🤞

Orchid and Karigan how you feeling?

Critter - is tomorrow the big day??

Weasel - I’ve had that recently. A five day bleed then 3/4 extra days of spotting afterwards. I feel drained, tired, achy and hot at night during that time. I have self-diagnosed low oestrogen but hey what do I know. It takes me a few days to feel better and then I ovulate late. This cycle I’m still waiting. CD21.

Ali - yes it’s quite a recent thing this messed up cycle stuff. Seems worse in fact since my HSG but that could just be a red herring. All literature says that HSG shouldn’t affect cycles.

Cleo - I honestly don’t know if I can face more tests. I’m happy that my scan was normal and my tubes are clear so structurally i know I’m fine. Sperm test was good too although morphology only 4%! I can’t see that my blood tests would be any better than before (probably worse) and I think that would stress me. I think I’m at the point now that I’m still trying and hoping but I’m not doing much more. I’ve tried everything except ivf (which we have agreed we won’t do) so I dont see the point. I’m kind of coming to terms with not having another I think. I’m heartbroken at the thought on the one hand but really trying hard to come to terms with it and focus on the benefits of 2.

How about you 3 cos I know all 3 of you have 2DC like me.....how do you feel about it all?

Thanks ladies, I guess we'll try for another few months and I'll maybe go back and see my usual lady. I know her appointments were overrunning but I wasn't expecting to be rushed out so quickly. I guess the positive side I can take from it was that she wasn't worried about my age or weight!

Yeah that is too harsh. And if you read anywhere online is pretty clear that it's 6 months for over 40's. I'd take that to a different gp when you get to 6 months. Unless you can afford to go private. In our area it is bare minimum blood tests only for fertility, and when mine came back bad, it was end of subject still. My gp's only advice was to keep trying and go private if no luck after 2 years (as 2 years is average over 40) which is a bit bonkers as if you wait 2 years it's likely to be game over by then anyway! Already feel like I'm clingng onto the fertility cliff by one finger nail.

Thanks that's what I thought, when she said a year I was shocked! Mum had taken 6 years to have me and I know tests were done (not sure the outcomes). My sister has endo as well. I was hoping for a little more but doc was saying goodbye to me while I was still sat talking to her. Just a little disappointed.

What is your family history if you don't mind me asking cookie?
Tests are supposed to be done from 6 months of trying if you are over 40, or 1 year for under 40's. I had tests done as I was having cycle oddities.
Sounds like your doc was a bit hasty in ushering you out! I know that gp's are having to cut down on spending for fertility issues, and some area's won't do anything on nhs anymore regardless of circumstance, however most will still do basic day 3 & 21 blood tests, although nothing will be done if there is a problem. Anything above and beyond the basic blood tests will need to be private

Just came back from the docs, I wanted to make sure everything was OK with my family history, age and weight. She told me they wouldn't do any tests until a year of trying and pretty much ushered me out the door. I feel a little bit cheated, I know it's only been 3 months but even the NHS site says if you're older get checked out earlier.

Sounds pretty recurrent to me weasle.
At least they are testing

Cleo not 100 % sure what the tests are for. I had them when I went to the recurrent miscarriage clinic appointment (when they said I wasn't really recurrent miscarriage as pregnancies didn't last long enough ie less than 5 weeks or I'd had a child between loses!) but I've been pregnant 7 times and have 2 kids!

@Presh12345 - I’m currently on Utrogestan which is similar I think and have incredibly sore and painful boobs. I’m not sure about the bad taste in mouth as I’ve had a sinus infection for a couple of weeks now and ALWAYS have a gross taste in my mouth at the moment!

Anyone help. So I woke in the middle of the night with the most disgusting, vile taste in my mouth. It freaked me out. I checked to see if I had something in there that had burst....nothing. I eventually got back to sleep and this morning, my boobs are so sore. My temps are rising according to ava but AF not due til Friday. Plus I'm on cyclogest, progesterone for the past week and a half for a thin lining. Has anyone had this on cyclogest before? It was gross. And it's still lingering.

I agree with Ali, we get good cycles and bad cycles, but just because you get a bad cycle does not mean there are not good ones left to come. But yeah, it's totally stressful.

Mimosa are you going to get tests done again? Might be worth it, it might put your mind at rest if all still ok. Or it may give you reason to take action if not.

Weasle - what is your blood test for? I wouldn't worry about the spotting, I've had that for about a year and still got a bfp with it. Even if things are slowing down or changing, we are still throwing kut eggs. Perimenopause can start now but it can also last up to 10 years, so not necessarily the end

I wish I had frozen eggs too Ali! But we don't think of these when we aee younger. As the song goes "if I could turn back time...."

Mimosa - the cycle changes are recent though right?

I do get 1-3 bad cycles and then a good one, or more. I had a really short cycle in March followed by a great one (with strong pg symptoms) followed by another ok cycle.

Even if you are having a poor cycle, it’s not permanent.

This cycle now is pretty poor although I did have ok prog symptoms around 7dpo. So wish I’d frozen some eggs when I was younger!

A friend of a friend was trying from late 30s, had one mc otherwise nothing. Then fell pg age 43. Loads of stories like this around. We do have some decent eggs left, just not as many as 10 years ago.

So I've started a new symptom spotting and not in a good way! I'm now convinced menopause is starting!
My period lasts 5 days, always. This week I'm having random brown spotting still and I'm on day 8, NEVER happens. Plus I'm feeling a bit out of sorts and I can't put my finger on it, bit achy, bit warm, but I have a normal temp.... don't know what's happening! I get the results from my blood test on 2nd July so I'm now dreading it

Booseys - so sorry AF arrived.

Karigan and Orchid - hope you’re both ok.

Ali - HSG was about 3 months ago.
I’ve always had the hot in bed feeling pre-AF but this has been different. It’s after AF finishes. It’s eased off mostly now (CD20) so I’m assuming my oestrogen is rising slowly.
My bloods were all good BUT they were taken a year ago now and they were 21 day tests for everything. So although my FSH was only 6 it was never repeated on CD2-3. It was a normal ovulation cycle I think (ie day 10-12 at least). My progesterone was 50 so v good but I distinctly remember strong ovulation that month. I just don’t seem to get that anymore:-( I think my ovary is just tired out/running out of eggs. I don’t get sore boobs post-ov anymore (despite having had positives on opks most month) either. I think the bottom line is that my cycles just aren’t what they were and I think I’m in denial.

Thank you Boosey. It was a non viable pregnancy for certain as the scan showed the embryonic sac at 4 weeks 5 days. They weren’t sure as it was too early for a fetal pole to be seen anyway not said it would probably not be viable as there was low hcg. Made it to 6 weeks 3 days before the bleeding started.

Just catching up again..
Karigan..So sorry it turned out to be AF. I've suffered the same ..completely convinced it was bfp and sadly turned out to be a very slow starting AF. But from what you were saying it sounded just like what i had with DS. I was over by about 10-12 days and it was a v light bleed each time. Then discovered it was a bfp when i was 12 weeks gone! !
I just can't understand how our cycles can be so different and how it puts us through this sh*t every month!! Take care xx

Mellon.. I only ever use the mucus method. Tried temping and opks but not willing to spend much money on it so mucus it is! The only problem is i get so much of the damned stuff i just can't pinpoint actual ovulation. Tried tests and they didn't work but they were cheapies off Amazon. Good luck xx

I use cheapo's in the afternoon and clearblue fertility monitor in the morning. The rigmarole starts tomorrow at cd8, have been ov'ing on average cd14 but not sure what will happen post mc.
We also have limited opportunities to dtd as dh has low hormones so can only perform a few times eod before he runs out of steam. (Much to his distress) he's been tested for testosterone this week and if its low hopefully they can do something about it. Blooming age. Anyome would think we were in our 80's not 40's. I think him upstairs needs to get with the times. Modern day living does not fit with his plans anymore