Over 40 ttc - summer baby dust for me!

I keep lurking and end even posted on an earlier thread - have 2 ds (8 & 7) with no ttc issues but now am 44 & have had lots of late night chats with dh about ttc#3. I've had an IUD in since ds2 but that's now out so we're seeing what happens and I have to say knowing that's out, am more on dtd than I have been for a long time . I have no idea what day I am on as the last 6 months have been 21-35 days with a lot of spotting etc hence the IUD coming out - gp suspects fibroids playing up rather than premenopausal and women in my family have had late menopauses. Anyway, here I am. Reading all your stories makes me think I am in for a tough ride but you all sound lovely and supportive x

@littlemimosa how did reflexology go? hope you are feeling balanced

@weasledee that made me laugh! it's always the way!

I am now 16 days late , only tested twice (BFN's) and making an appt with the GP in the morning! maybe 29 DPO (?) I would be ovulating around now going by my regular cycle and I feel all the ovulation feelings, watery CM painful ovaries ... I asked H if we should DTD and he was as confused as I am!

Why does it have to be this big a mindf**k!!!

Haha weasle! that's hilarious. Must have been your subconcious telling you not to test too early by not restocking the sticks!!

I held out today and didn't test again. Going to try and hold out until Friday, thats my goal. I would like to test again before af gets here, just because its fun.

Mimosa yes menopause will be utter crap, but I vow to take it on the chin if I have another baby first. If I don't then I'm declaring war on it as It'll be taking my opportunities and shitting on me while its at it. No thank you. It's not welcome here yet.

See Weasel - you prove me right in no time;-)

Shiny - that must’ve been a difficult time for you. Therapy could be a good idea, I do believe in the mind-body connection. It’s highly likely that if you’re scared on some level that it’s affecting your hormones.

Orchid - sorry to hear you’re finding things difficult too x

Weasel - I’ll eat my hat if you last til AF due date

Cleo - step away! It’s too soon!

Thanks ladies for all the votes of confidence. I’m CD37 and struggling to maintain hope. I hope you’re all right. If nothing else this feels cr@p! I’m dreading menopause. Talk about feeling dried out! Anyway got reflexology tomorrow so really looking forward to that and hoping it’ll help balance me up. Still trying to put a tiny bit of weight on but it’s surprisingly hard. I don’t want to resort to eating general rubbish.

So ladies, I'm not going to lie, went in the bathroom to get a shower and thought, IM GONNA POAS!!!! Doesn't matter that I'm only 8/9 DPO or that I said I was going to wait till AF due....
BUT!!! I actually had no pregnancy tests left??!!! Can u believe that??? I'd peed on everything I owed last month! I thought there was 1 left! Nope!
(Pre menopausal memory loss??!!)
So I now have 2 packs coming in the next couple of days, thanks to amazon

So sorry Critter. Agree with mellongoose... take some time to be kind to yourself.
Mimosa, I agree, am sure it will be back.
I've done 3 months of supps and acu and herbs, and I'm going to leave it for the summer. I'm doing a build on my house, plus away quite a lot. I might join people on the IVF bus come september.
Good luck to you all - I'll be popping in from time to time. Sending you all lots of baby dust I hope.

Sorry for being absent 

@Critter I'm so sorry. We were all rooting for you. Please be gentle for a while.

Ladies, I get the feeling we are letting it get us down. Come on, Mother Nature, I've been your loyal servant for nigh on 42 years now....please be kind!!!!

In my case I missed my DH on the crucial days as predicted. Another month wasted.

Am thinking of you all and wishing we could all be successful.

Ooh shinyblackdog sending big hugs... hope you were able to have some giggles with your little girl on such a rubbish day..
littlemimosa I'm sure this is just a crap cycle and hormones will come flooding back..
@Orchid222 total shit about the neighbour.. every time I look at my niece and my soon to be born nephew I think... you would have a little playmate cousin your age.. sister in law due in 8 weeks.. thankfully we are away so I can go and see when all the rest of the hullabaloo has died down..
@weasledee Day 27 in cycle, can't give an exact date on ov as don't use
the strips.. but af due in 3.5 days.. am ignoring any possible sore boobs or aches.. as my body lies!!! But off to Paris in 2 weeks with eldest offspring ( I had her really young 🤣🤣) so hoping to eat my body weight in soft cheese and seafood.. not heaving my guts up in the Louvre.. oh who am I kidding I would love to be heaving my guts up if I was preggo... big love to everyone on here.. you are all awesome and keeping me sane xx

What dpo are you now weasle? Waiting until af late? Yeah right
I was thinking abput doing that too, but I know its not going to happen. But I get so fed up of seeing that stark white stick!

Also weasle - I hear so many people say that the cycle they got their bfp is the one with no symptoms.....

Cleo, i nearly tested at 8DPO but I stopped myself. I'm going to try and actually not test till AF late... likelihood???!!!
I'm not feeling hopefully, not a single symptom. Lost that hopeful feeling after that strong ovulation stick....

Shiny, that sounds so heartbreaking. I'm glad you have your dd for comfort.

Mimosa, please don't stress, this will come to an end and you'll be back on the horse before you know it.

Orchid, that's so harf isn't it. My neighbour is pregnant too, due around the dame time I would have been. It's like a slap in the face. An ongoing one.

Well I was a muppet yesterday, tested at 9dpo. I should know better. Bfn obvs. But at least it was to early to actually mean anything, am not convinced this cycle anyway. And I'm on holiday in a few weeks so at least I can drink

Thanks for adding me @Shiny, sorry to hear about the way you are feeling right now, glad you spent your difficult day in the sunshine with your daughter x

Sorry Shiny - must have been a difficult day but glad you spent it with loved ones.

Mimosa - this isn’t permanent, it’s just an anovulatory cycle. What cd are you on now?

Evening everyone, sorry the updated list took a while. Last week was the first anniversary of dd2's birth/death at 20 weeks after anomaly scan - spent it with dd, had a lovely day bunking off nursery in the sunshine. Made me realise though, while I was devastated when I miscarried in April, a little part of me was relieved I wouldn't have to go through another anomaly scan. Maybe my brain told my body and that's why it's playing me up now... Seriously considering some therapy.

Critter, so sorry about your test - we're all feeling it I think.

Faith- thanks for that link. That’s very interesting. It’s just confirmed what I was thinking. I just can’t face a painful procedure. The HSG was weird enough.

This is me- hot flashes, dry skin, dry eyes, dry vag, no period, no ovulation. I mean talk about ticking all the boxes for low oestrogen/ menopause God I miss my hormones. I’m not ready for this.

Alibaba: 42, dds 8 & 6, ttc 2 years
Apple: 42, mmc, tfmr, chemical, mc, ttc#1 three years
AtrocityNeedles: 44, ttc#1
Booseys: 46, ds, ttc 2.5-3 years
Chat: 45, 5dc, 3 mc, 1 chemical
Chendy: 40, poss thinking about ttc#3
Claire: 44
Clara: 45, ttc #3
Cleo: 41, dc 5 & 7, mmc May, ttc 15 months
Cookie: 40, ttc#1, 3 months
Critter: 40, ttc#1, doing IVF
Dicky: 40, ttc#3
Eloisa: 45, dc 4, ttc 2 years
Emma: 41, ttc#1, mc in May
Emmalou: 42, dc 17, 10, 6
Faith: 43, dd 3.5, 2 mc, ttc 2 years
Helbelle: 42, mmc at 40, dd 14 months, BFP!!!
Hmmm: 41, 1dc, ttc 1 month
Hobbes: 41, ds 5, ttc 3.5 years, ectopic, IVF, chemical, 2 mcs
Karigan: 40.5, ttc 7 months, 1 mc
Lapsed: 43, ttc #1
LittleMimosa: 42, dc 5 & 7, ttc 18 months
Letsdothis: 43, ttc #1
Matts: 48, dc 11 & 6, 4 chemicals
Mellongoose: 42, dd 3.5, ttc 2 years
Minime: 41, ttc #1 for 23 mths, 1 chemical and 1 mc in march
Nor: 44, ds 3, Patau's loss, ttc #2
Orchid: 41, dc 2.5, ttc >1 year, mc June
PollyIndia: 40?, ds, ttc 18 months
Presh: 39, ttc#1, mmc 2017, Graves disease
Shiny: 40, dd 3, tfmr 2017, mc April
Sparrow: 43(?), ds 1.5, doing IVF
Weasle: 42, dc 7 & 5, 2 mcs 2017, chemical in March

Ladies just reading the ES in the way home and saw this article - can’t recall who was chatting about endo scratching but here you go :
www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.standard.co.uk/news/health/invasive-ivf-procedure-fails-to-boost-fertility-and-is-waste-of-time-say-doctors-a3877981.html%3famp

So sorry to hear that Critter. It must be extra hard when you’ve invested so much in it and actually seen the embryos. Take time to grieve and recover mentally as well as physically. You will feel up to it again but it’ll take time. Also don’t forget there is still always the chance you’ll fall pregnant naturally. That happened to a friend of mine in her 30s. She went thru one failed ivf then 3 months later fell pregnant naturally. She always says she felt that the ivf woke something up inside her and enabled her to conceive. Sending you a big hug ❤️

Sorry to hear this @Critter. Sending you warm hugs and the best of luck for next time. 🙏🏻 Look after yourself. X

So sorry @critter, was thinking of you x

@CritterTamer - I'm so sorry. It's so shit. I know it's not much consolation, but you would have beaten the odds had you been successful, as it is unusual to work first time. There is no reason it won't work next time tho. I know the idea of going through it all again is awful at the moment, but honesty it's easier the 2nd time. Did you have frozen embryos? If so, FET is a doddle in comparison with a fresh cycle.