TTC after miscarriage Thread 21. JKS

Thank you @passtheaftereights. It’s just so frustrating! Feel like we’ve been waiting forever for fw and now this. But yes as you say, tomorrow is another day x

Huge hugs @sweetpea0318 it is horrendous & hard on DP's too, think it can feel very powerless esp when we're crazed about timings etc. Hope you make up soon & can lean on each other, tomorrow's a new day xx

Just had a huge fight with my OH. He says he’s feeling the pressure of everything and couldn’t ‘perform’ and I’m now in tears because I def ovulated this afternoon but there’s absolutely no chance of anything happening. I’m so upset. This whole experience is just so horrendous.

@Pancakes7 It's such an awful feeling isn't it? A bit like the shine has been taken off the whole experience and it's one of the most important we get to do in our lives. We do need to try to be positive though, if we want something enough, we'll do anything for it - including getting over these negative thoughts

@maxiflump1 I'm so sorry for the worry you're having but please try to find some joy in your situation. You have your BFP, that's one step. Next step will be your first scan, just take it one day at a time and you'll get there xx

Evening ladies. I test again today and still a strong line but just paranoid somethings going to go wrong! I think I'm going to go and buy multiple packs of white pants for the next 8 weeks as just went to toilet and freaked as I though o had pink spotting in my pants. Turns out it was the pink butterfly patten showing through!!

@TedLife I'm the same. I just had my fist pregnancy ending in mmc. I was so excited and feel now it's taken the shine of pregnancy. I so want to be pregnant again but know it won't be the same. I'll be much more anxious and guarded. I just hope I'm as quick to get a BFP this time again.

Just checking in! Thanks for asking @YellowDaffodils I’m alright. About 90% nervous and 10% excited right now haha! I’m 4+5 tomorrow. Got the midwife on Thursday, counting down the days to 7 week scan but so incredibly anxious for it. I hope the relaxed approach works for you this month!

@Laney79 I hope the bleeding stops for you now hun! Hopefully you can get back to TTC again asap 🤞

@TedLife totally understand how you feel. I’ve got all these feelings right now, MC really does make pregnancy a scary, emotional and stressful time. I’m so up and down right now (and the hormones don’t help🤣) I hope that you get your BFP very soon and when you do, I hope it isn’t too much of a stressful experience for you!

@Boboelephant FX for ovulation!! I really want this to be your month, got everything crossed for you and for lots of June BFP’s I hope 🤞

@KnitKitty good luck for testing tomorrow! I hope you get a nice dark line. Feeling hopeful for you!

@SerenaOverjoyed I hope all goes well and hope you get answers soon!

Sorry for the long post. I’m still lurking in the background quietly sending you all luck and hugs!!

@Blondcat thanks for your reply. Like many things on this thread, it's comforting to know that others have similar feelings.

@tedlife I know exactly what you mean about feeling the mc has coloured your view of being pregnant. I am hoping I will be able to relax a bit next time but am scared that it will happen again or assuming all is well I will just wish the time away and not embrace the experience. I think for me seeing so many people having had a mc then going on to have a baby helps me to be more positive.
Hope the fresh start is what you need and you get your bfp soon x

@knitkitty goodluck for tomorrow x

@TedLife thank you! We're using a moving company too! Xx

@MrsLCW Hope your move goes well! Ours was fine, we used real movers this time (as opposed to my husband, me and a random guy with a van!) and it was 100% less stressful so I would highly recommend. Especially after everything that had been happening with the MC it was nice to enjoy the process. Settling well into the new place and keeping myself busy with some retail therapy to fill the new rooms

@weasledee a place called Sandymoor just near Runcorn! X

Arhhhh MrsLCW welcome to the NW, best place to live
Whereabouts are you relocating to?

@TedLife I'm in a similar position, we're in the process of relocating from the north east to the north west and I'm now looking forward to the fresh start!
How was the move? X

Evening ladies, I've moved house since my first (and only) post here so frantically trying to get up to speed with you all!
I am reading everything but a bit like @RedRobin7 I forget what people said after I finish reading! I'm sure I'll get the hang of it but I'm delighted for those who are seeing their BFPs, wishing you all happy, healthy pregnancies.

I started AF today, first since the miscarriage and body completely on track with 29 day cycle (just like before I was pregnant) so taking that as a really good sign. Not enjoying having my first period since Feb but as we all know it's just a step towards TTC again!

Feelings have been all over the place recently. As I said I moved but not just house, we moved to an entirely different part of the country so I'm trying to adapt to that. We were planning the move regardless of the pregnancy but after the miscarriage, we latched on to it as a way to have a fresh start in a way. With everything going on my feelings about TTC again keep going up and down. I desperately want to have a baby with my husband but this was my first time being pregnant and I feel like before, in my mind, being pregnant was going to be an exciting and wonderful experience, now it just feels scary and like I'm opening myself up to get hurt. I feel like miscarrying has really coloured my view of pregnancy and that makes me really sad.

Sorry for going on a bit here but I really am glad to hear your good news and I'm really happy to be part of this huddle 🐧

Massive good luck for the morning @KnitKitty we'll be here either way 😘 xx

Second what KK said @Pancakes7, hope tomorrow turns out to be a tonic rather than an ordeal. Fx for a boozy wedding and lots of dancing; don't think about the future - it'll happen xx

@SerenaOverjoyed hear hear to that! 👶🍷

@Boboelephant no restraining orders whatsoever, it's a date. Rooting for that egg tomorrow 🥚

PassTheAfterEights testing tomorrow morning, so will keep you posted.

Pancakes7 Will be thinking of you tomorrow. I hope it turns out to be a lovely day and takes your mind off everything and you enjoy yourself. Take it easy and find a quiet corner if you need some time to yourself. xx That's very reassuring to hear that you know 3 people who MC last year and now have babies, thanks for sharing that.

Laney79 I hope this is a good sign and you'll stop bleeding now that you've passed whatever it was. Does sound like the sac from what others have said. xxx

Boboelephant It's such a hard situation to feel calm in, isn't it? You so desperately want things to happen and every month it doesn't it's heart-wrenching, and makes you feel even more stressed about it happening. It's just a vicious circle. I'll send you some zen vibes for TTC. I really, truly hope it happens soon for you. Just try to stay calm and positive (although I know this is much easier said than done). Hugs xxx

YellowDaffodils86 I've never used OPKS or temping and just have a vague idea of when I ovulate (which for me is usually around CD16 going by ovulation pain and CM). I think not tracking can be quite liberating, and so long as you JKS in what you believe to be your fertile week I'm convinced that is good enough. I would totally do OPKS and/or temping if I'd struggled to conceive for a few months though, I can see that it gives you some feeling of control and helps you understand your cycles better, so whatever works really! I hope not tracking is a nice break for you.

SerenaOverjoyed 3 weeks for a GP appointment?!?!?! That's crazy! Good luck with being bolshy! Don't be afraid to get what you need from them. That sucks about your holiday. Could you postpone it by a week or so? Or bring it forwards even?

I had a better day today. Felt a lot calmer. Thanks everyone for the messages of support, it's really invaluable help. You're all so wonderful. xxx

@SerenaOverjoyed My husband is coming with me so we can support each other. He's been great through all this. 2 friends there know but tbh I am hoping to try and forget for the day. Luckily it's not too far so can come home before the end if I need to. We had a Wedding on Monday just gone up in Nottingham (we are in Kent) we didn't go. Also missed a music festival which would have been Sunday. Not been the best timing. I have a work launch up in Nottingham in 2 weeks which I'm dreading. I don't want to be away from home and on my own...

Try and think positive. The GP did say to me having an mc doesn't mean you'll have another. Statistically you're more likely to have a successful pregnancy next time. Obviously even though I hear this, I too have the fear of another mmc. But we can't give up.

I really hope we all get our bfp's soon and have successful pregnancies. I do know 3 people who had mmc/mc last year but have babies now. That's what's keeping me going.

Laney blimey! You poor thing, bleeding on your holiday. Hopefully things will ease up now if you have passed the sack. I can imagine you having a medicinal g&t in the sun☉ or a raki if things get really painful

YellowDaffodils woo! Live dangerously without pee sticks! Totally get the need to give ttc less thinking time.

PassTheAfterEights Rose and babies is the dream!

Pancakes7 I'm sorry it feels so hard to face people. Weddings can be really tough after bad news. Maybe you can pop in the loo and look on here from time to time? Will there be someone with you who knows and can do some hand holning? Or not go at all if you feel you can't hack it. Either way be kind to yourself

GP has no apts for 3wks so I'm getting a phone call Wednesday. I'll try and bolshily ask for a referral and baby asprin.

I'm a bit cross today. Looked at dates and realised next AF will be due on the 1st day of our unbooked but planned July hol. I feel fatalistically certain I'll conceive and mc again. Not sure whether to book anyway, move it forward or skip ttc this month. I feel annoyed as I wanted a month to lose a bit of weight pre bikini.

Hey @YellowDaffodils86! (Waves back) Yep most of my last month twins aren't twins this month with all of our changing cycles! I am currently in fw and expecting (and hoping) that ovulation is tomorrow. It's been jks like demons in Casa Bobo so fx hey! Not that we don't cover every base every month but maybe this time will finally do it. 🤞🤞 Hopefully you're not far behind!!

Ah im out the loop a little. Tried to keep up, but like others have said this post moved fast.
@SerenaOverjoyed im really sad to read about your CP, its so unfair. I hope the appointments you have with GP etc have positive news and advice for you.
Just dont give up hope.

@Boboelephant hey 'little wave' are you in FW now, we were very similar in our cycle stages but I think its altered a bit now.

How are all the BFPs?
Sorry to those that are new, i am genuinely shocked just how many of us go through this and how awful some people's stories are.

@Laney79 i cant wait for you be back ttc, you have had such rough ride. Hopefully this your AF, it sounds like it is, and you can start moving forward.

I have gone rogue this month, no opks or tracking. Just going to JKS and see what happens. Iv got an estimated FW from app and will monitor CM, but need a break from obsessing. I think FW is approaching, so we will see.

@Laney79 I had exactly the same thing with my first mc last year. I had a really heavy, painful AF and passed a grey looking grape weeks and weeks after my negative test. I was so shocked by it but the bleeding stopped pretty much straight after so hopefully yours will too and you can enjoy your holiday xx

@SerenaOverjoyed sounds like a good idea and I hope you get some answers. A few here have been to RMC. I haven't but did see a consultant gynae. Sounded a bit similar. Lots of blood tests and I also had a scan to check ovaries.
@KnitKitty definitely soak up the calm anyway you can. Ive been really trying to do that this month and not be so obsessive about it all. Gets harder each month but I have defi felt calmer this one since my wobble. Everything crossed for you tomorrow.
@PassTheAfterEights the roof terrace sounds like the dream! When you and I finally get those two lines- and resulting babies- I'll be hunting you and your funny DH down for those drinks! Bobo fantasises as Pass starts looking at restraining orders
🤣🤣 no ov yet but if it's same as last month I should ovulate tomorrow. All signs are looking good so far. 🤞
@MrsGS76 there was no waiting here! Instructions said to start within 15 min of application. As soon as I felt it coming out I demanded that DH crack on immediately! 😂
@Laney79 I don't know much about the natural way but sounds like that was some retained tissue which would explain the bleeding and pain. Hopefully that's it now and you can enjoy your long awaited bd'ing!

Thanks guys.

Weirdly just passed something strange-poss the collapsed preg sac? It was greyish? Just tissue-obv completely collapsed (saw someone describe theirs like a grape before?) but the fact it was an odd colour makes me think sac. Wonder if that's why I've been bleeding like this for so long? If it wasn't the sac then I'm a bit concerned as to what it was!!! My negative test was weeks ago (8th may) - so I think I'll assume it's a bit of retained tissue. Fingers crossed that'll help things along.

Thanks for all your reassurance -you literally have stopped me freaking out on several occasions! X