TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 18: Christmas cake for Christmas babies

*loved

Lived that @Beck1988

www.lovewhatmatters.com/to-the-girl-who-hated-my-pregnancy-announcement/

Have a read if you have time 💙💗

@zarala I’m 35 next month so feeling the same. I’m annoyed that we didn’t start younger, but I suppose then we wouldn’t have our girl.
My daughter is amazing and if she is all I can have then I’m incredibly lucky. It’s the not knowing what’s happening to me that I struggle to cope with. That’s good that you getting referred to RMC I’m going to try and see the gp next week

@ApplesTheHare @BabynameEdie @zarala thank you girls! I’m going to try my hardest to wait to test, I have a few tests stocked up so it’s very hard to resist but I’m so scared of seeing a BFN 🤦🏻‍♀️ You definitely need patience when TTC and that is something I seriously lack haha!

New thread! And wow, so much to catch up on. Hello to new people joining the thread, I've found it lovely and supportive.

@Claire138 sorry for the BFN. Here's hoping your next cycle is the one.
@Lovemysparkle rant away, it sounds like you've had a really tough time. The support after mc does really seem to vary. And I totally get you that it makes you a different person. It sometimes feels impossible that the world continues as it was, work is just work, everything the same as it was before, except it feels totally different now.
@hidcat how frustrating for you, it's such a long time for you to have to wait.
@Primrose16 so sorry, have a hug
@zarala I'm interested in people's experiences of breastfeeding too. I stopped feeding my little boy a couple of weeks before I miscarried. He was only having a couple of feeds a day so my boobs didn't noticeably have milk, but after my mc my milk came in loads (2nd trimester loss so they said my milk would likely come in) and I was quite engorged and uncomfy for a few days. My mc was only 6 weeks ago so I still have milk, I'm not sure how long it'll last. I'm sure that bf during pregnancy is not linked to the mc, I'd been seeing a consultant while I was still pregnant but things weren't looking great, and she said there was no reason to stop bf.
@hayleyfx how frustrating, I hope you get some stronger lines over the next few days.
@daffodil77 have a hug, it's just so crap.
@TheDinosaurRoars the things that get you are so unpredictable, sending you positive thoughts.
@BabynameEdie sorry AF is on its way. Fingers crossed for the next cycle.

@Primrose16 it is so hard to think about trying again- I am also starting to think My little girl is a miracle- but I've decided to bite the bullet and get some tests done - my GP agreed to refer me to RMC. So I'm waiting not for AF to appear so I can go get my blood tests and stuff and see if we can find out why this keeps happening!
I'm 36 next month so really feeling the pressure

@hayleyfx - I totally agree with @strawberrye , if you can wait it out a couple more days you'll get a definitive answer. I much prefer waiting than just being disappointed and wasting so many tests! But that's just me (i'm hella stingy)

Sorry to everyone who's AF has shown up uninvited
And @TheDinosaurRoars Sorry about the baby announcement. Sometimes the sadness comes out of the most unexpected places...

Thinking of you @BabynameEdie

I thought I would be starting AF as I have so many cramps but still nothing. I wondered whether the medication the hospital gave me to stop my milk coming in would make my cycles return quicker but maybe not. Part of me thinks it is probably good for my cycle to take a while longer so I can get the post mortem results first of all but the other part of me is so desperate to have another baby to hold in my arms I don’t want to wait.

Hello all, so much to catch up on!
Have just started spotting, think it's the beginning of af 😢 so sad, annoyed, fed up. Guess it's good to start a 'normal' cycle again after the mc but I just was so hoping it would all be good news this month. I so desperately want to be a mum and feel so ready for it.

@hayleyfx yikes so confusing for you! Patience is the hardest thing with this game but there's just nothing you can do except wait it out and keep testing... am sending you baby bean vibes 🤰

TheDinosaurRoars some announcements are definitely worse than others. I think it depends on how much it reminds you of your own situation and how you find out.

Everything crossed for you hayleyfx

Just found out one of my neighbours has recently had another child which means her baby was born around about the time that mine died. DD2 will probably go to school with her older child and it will be a constant reminder. It’s really upset me even though I have so far been fine with other birth announcements. Not sure why this one stings so much.

@TheDinosaurRoars thank you so much, I guess I’ll find out in the next day or two! 🤞🏼

Everything crossed for you @hayleyfx

The FRER keeps getting darker as the day goes on, if this is an evap it’s so cruel! 🙄😂 it’s a very convincing one if it is. Gonna go buy some more FRER now, the amount of money I spend on hpts is ridiculous
FX for a BFP tomorrow! (Still not feeling hopeful though 😩)

@strawberrye @NoCatsHere I’m going to try my hardest to wait, hopefully I can lol!
@TheDinosaurRoars thank you! I’m keeping everything crossed, used to seeing stark white negatives that stay negative so this FRER really confused me lol! FX

@ApplesTheHare I’m sorry for your loss but welcome here.

@hayleyfx I’m going against the grain here but I’ve known really early BFPs only show once the test has dried out. So I am still staying hopeful for you.

@zarala I know several women who have breastfed all through pregnancy and continued feeding their toddlers and babies.

@Primrose16 thinking of you. I was under the RMC despite having two DC in between. My GP referred me.

Hope everyone else is doing ok today. This thread moves so quickly, I sometimes struggle to keep up with you all.

primrose I’m just so sorry to read this. I’m so glad you have your daughter for cuddles later. Please do get some rest. Hugs to you.

hayley sorry you’re having confusing lines. I would definitely not test again for 2 days if you can bear it. The closer you get to you being late with af then the better your line will be.

@strawberrye sorry af got you. Here's to Christmas babies and cake!!
@Primrose16 I think they will definitely see you. There are other ladies on here who have had a DC in between and under RMC. I'm not under RMC as I had a EP and a MMC but I asked the doc to refer me to a specialist and they are doing the same tests to check for any issues even though I have DS. For me I just want all the information. Maybe you just need a break too. Be kind to yourself x

@zarala nope not under a specialist. I had 1 mc and a mmc before my daughter. Then these 2 mc this year. I doubt they will see me with having a break in mc by carrying my daughter to full term. But I will be going to the GP to get a sick note so I might ask. But I’m not sure if I can do it again. I’m thinking my girl is a little miracle 💕

@hayleyfx I totally understand about clinging on to hope. If your AF isn't due for a few days yet why not wait until she is due to test again? Seeing as hCG is meant to double every 48-72 hours by then you should have an much better idea. I know it's really hard, some people find it easier to test more frequently but I know I just find the disappointment of BFNs when testing early worse than the waiting! Definitely a personal choice x

Forgot to say sorry that af got you @strawberrye it’s rubbish hopefully there’s better news next month x

Thanks ladies. I guess I’m just trying to cling onto any hope I can get. I’ve never had an evap in the past, on the many many pregnancy tests I’ve done lol, so I don’t know what they look like really. In my last pregnancy my lines were so faint at first but got dark quickly within 2 days so I guess I’ll just see. Keeping everything crossed but definitely not got my hopes up. AF is due in 3 days, the day we’re going on holiday so I hope she stays away 😩😂

@Primrose16 I'm so so sorry. That's heartbreaking. Sending hugs. Hope you've got lots of support x

@hayleyfx I'm sorry that's rubbish. I must say I don't really believe the whole "a line is a line" mantra if the line has shown up outside the timing window. Believing those lines to be true in the past has just led to disappointment for me. As agonising as it is the best way to tell is time - and if AF shows up or if your tests start to become positive in the timing window. Fingers crossed for you that the tests start to become positive.

Well AF caught up with me yesterday as I thought might be the case, so onto hoping for a Christmas miracle for me and the rest of you lovely ladies x

@hayleyfx I think you should never trust a squinter on a FRER. They are so sensitive that they will give you a clear line early on for a BFP. This was my FRER last week with hcg at 50, and the comparative cheapie (same sample). The FRER is so clear by comparison. Definitely retest though as you'll see progression quickly on a FRER.

Hmmm seems a bit of tricky one if I’m honest @hayleyfx I guess not much you can do but test again tomorrow. When is AF due? Sorry it’s so up in the air.