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Conception

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Can anyone help with who the father is likely to be based on these dates please?

31 replies

butterflystar · 07/03/2018 11:15

1st January, unprotected sex, ejaculation, Morning After Pill. Period comes but when it does is much darker and thicker than usual, sorry TMI.

2nd February, brief unprotected sex, no ejaculation, Morning After Pill. Period comes and is a normal period.

18th February go to Dr over feeling dizzy - Dr find low levels of HCG. Monitored for a couple of weeks, HCG levels decline. No pregnancy.

I don't know what the HCG levels were from the blood tests, but can anyone tell me which incident of unprotected sex is most likely to have caused this?

Thank you.

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butterflystar · 08/03/2018 22:19

Thanks all.

Maybe I need to stop trying to work it out.

Either way, he's put me in this horrible position of having to wonder, which I never should have been in the first place.

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Willswife · 08/03/2018 14:12

I'm so sorry that you were assaulted.

Whilst we could all take a guess at which incident created the pregnancy, unfortunately nobody is going to be able to tell you for sure.

As other posters have mentioned, the HCG levels may be an indicator, but even with those I'm not sure you can be certain.

I hope your counsellor can help you work through your feelings.

FreiasBathtub · 08/03/2018 14:03

Oh butterfly. I think take your time and talk it through with your counsellor before you make any big decisions about talking to the doctor.

To be honest, now that you've outlined the timeline more I wonder whether the dizziness and fainting might be related to the first incident itself, rather than to a pregnancy. The body responds in a lot of surprising ways to trauma.

I really think it's more likely to have been a chemical pregnancy from the second incident. As you say, pregnancy certainly can happen without full ejaculation. And if it was the first instance, with the weird period afterwards being a miscarriage, I don't think you'd still have HCG levels indicating pregnancy by the 18th Feb. If it was the first incident and the second period was the miscarriage, then I don't know at all what the first period would have been - as pp have said, it doesn't sound like implantation bleeding.

Have you been able to talk to DP about any of this? It's an awful lot to try to straighten out on your own. Flowers

butterflystar · 08/03/2018 13:27

Thank you all.

I didn't want to tell the Dr what happened, but you're right perhaps I should ask.

I really think the second incident more likely BUT for the fact that it was microseconds of contact without any ejaculation (that was with DP, I really wanted us to 'try' (to prove I still could) but it was ill fated and we had a condom mishap, hence the unprotected bit).

I know pregnancy can occur without ejaculation. But seems so unlikely, compared to the other full scenario?

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FreiasBathtub · 08/03/2018 07:22

Butterfly, is it possible that the sickness/dizziness is related to something other than the pregnancy? It might be a bit of a red herring as the timings don't seem to match well with either possible date of conception.

I agree that getting exact HCG levels might help, as a pp has outlined. Is there any way you could feel comfortable talking to your doctor about it? If he/she understands the background he/she might even be able to refer you to someone who's more of an expert and could maybe provide a more definitive answer.

MagicalCreatures · 07/03/2018 23:23

I’d try and get the results of your HCG tests because the levels can indicate an estimate of weeks you are pregnant. For example if it was a chemical pregnancy (very early miscarriage) resulting from the second incident, then the levels would probably have been in the hundreds still.
But if it was from the first incident, then at that many weeks tour looking at more the thousands.
Just an idea. So sorry you had to go through that. X x x

RLOU88 · 07/03/2018 20:32

I’m not really sure sickness would set in within 3 weeks - a month of conception taking place, implantation itself usually doesn’t even take place until 10 days after the intercourse and then you would get a positive test after implantation. That’s what made me and a PP think the second time x obviously none of us know for sure x did you ask the doctor for this off the record opinion ? Xx

yawningyoni · 07/03/2018 20:28

I had a dizzy and vomiting episode when I was maybe two days after conception (implantation?) and felt very sick from the day before my period was due so morning sickness can kick in very early.

I'm sorry to hear about your terrible experience, hope the counselling helps

butterflystar · 07/03/2018 20:15

Thanks RLOU.

I'm still really confused, I was dizzy and really unwell for several weeks before going to the Dr, so before the second incident. That was what took me there.

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RLOU88 · 07/03/2018 19:50

Implantation bleeding is lighter pink or light brown and not thick or heavy (like you said in your first post) so I already assumed it wasn’t this. Most people don’t even notice or have implantation bleeding, it’s only streaky and light appearing only really when you wipe. It’s very rarely heavy xx

butterflystar · 07/03/2018 19:13

Is it possible that the period after the first incident was implantation (brown blood) and that the period after the second MAP was the pregnancy from the first incident being passed?

Because I can't work out how HCG levels would be elevated from the second incident to the point that they were detectable 2 weeks after a chemical pregnancy.

I am no expert on this stuff, though.

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RLOU88 · 07/03/2018 19:00

I don’t think the hormones would still be high enough from the first time to be picked up a month after the bleed, that’s why I believed it was the second time. Obviously these are just opinions xx

Icklepickle101 · 07/03/2018 18:50

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mimibunz · 07/03/2018 18:48

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butterflystar · 07/03/2018 18:44

Thanks Freias, I don't have the exact HCG levels, I wonder if it would be worth me asking for them.

Periods were around the usual time. The period after the first one was weird, sorry, TMI very brown which is totally unusual. But if that was a 'miscarriage' as such (caused by the MAP? Can it work like that) then would the HCG still be there a month later?

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FreiasBathtub · 07/03/2018 13:41

Oh OP, so sorry, this is a horrible situation. I can completely understand why you want to know. I hope your counsellor can help you find some closure.

I'm not an expert, just a TTC nerd. Were either of your periods late? When were they, compared to the sex?

If your second period ended just before 18th February, I'd say it's possible that it was incident 2 and the doctor picked up some residual HCG from an early loss (i.e. chemical pregnancy). Otherwise, I'd guess probably incident 1.

Did the doctor give you the exact levels, or just tell you that they were consistent with pregnancy?

I so hope you're able to find some resolution to all this. What a horrible situation. Please don't feel the need to respond to me if these questions are intrusive.

butterflystar · 07/03/2018 13:15

Thanks both x

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Stephisaur · 07/03/2018 12:02

If it was from the 1st of jan, you’d have been around 9 weeks pregnant on the 18th Feb.

If it were the 2nd of Feb then you’d only just about be 4 weeks on the 18th (they always add 2 weeks!) which is still pretty early to test. Just look at the amount of threads on here where people aren’t sure if they have a line the day their periods are due (which would typically be 4 weeks)

Obviously I’m no expert and I don’t know if you could ever get an answer for sure, but I would think that 1st Jan is the more likely contended (particularly due to the fact that he ejaculated)

I don’t know if this is the answer you want, sending my love to you at this difficult time xx

RLOU88 · 07/03/2018 12:00

Oh goodness, OP, terribly sorry my lovely.
I don’t know for sure, but I hope you find the answers and support that you need and deserve. My best wishes to you x

butterflystar · 07/03/2018 11:47

Yes, Dr knew about MAP.

Sorry, this is probably a confusing thread.

One of these incidents was non-consensual and I'm trying to get the answer to this straight in my head so I can talk to my rape counsellor about it.

I feel very strongly that I need to know if this was part of the assault, or DP. I just don't know how to work it out.

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butterflystar · 07/03/2018 11:46

Doctor told me test a week after blood test and they were negative at that point, I can't remember the brand.

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RLOU88 · 07/03/2018 11:45

Did the doctor know you had the morning after pill on both occasions

RLOU88 · 07/03/2018 11:44

Did you ever do a preg test ? If so, which brand ? Only asking because that will tell us the levels were enough to be read on certain makes of tests

butterflystar · 07/03/2018 11:44

iwasjustabout it would be great if HCG levels were raised for a reason other than pregnancy, but the Doctor says the fact that they were raised, and then declined back to normal levels indicates pregnancy.

Especially as there have been two incidents of unprotected sex.

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butterflystar · 07/03/2018 11:41

Definitely not pregnant before 1st Jan.

I don't know where I was in my cycle on either occasion.

The Doctor said that the HCG levels indicated pregnancy on 18th February, they have been declining as time goes on and now confirmed no pregnancy.

I'm assuming it's some kind of chemical pregnancy/early miscarriage from one of the two incidents, but I don't know which one.

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