When the going gets tough, the tough get Yams

Also apparently 10+ daya nl sex is too much for me as I was lying next to DH last night and multiple times thought about just hopping on hahaha. Thankfully didnt, as with the length of time hes waited, he'd have finished before I even got his trousers off 😂. Anyway tonights the night we are to start DTD according to my doctor! If his doctors tell him to abstain again for any reason I'll be round there screaming 😂

Hope this is the one for you @SoozC

Haha @pinkdonkey well male sure to get him to "clear out" the day before he starts his four days before the sample is due, as 4 days is fine but 10 days is apparently not haha. Thankfully no accidents for my DH so hes away to his appointment soon. He was going on about catholic priests this morning, clearly it wouldnt be a job for him 😂.

@LexieJean so sorry to hear about the cramping! Look after yourself. 😕

Woken at 3am with cramping 😭
Dammit I really thought it was going to be marvellous March for me. I even had sweet potatoes!

Yea went to a specialist in Chester le street and all they found was a polyp and had a biopsy everything fine, they said I have erosion and that's it really I went to my gp after and was given clomid because hospitals are reluctant to give it out with the cost of monitoring, x

Chooklas DH was horrified when I went to breast clinic and the Dr felt my boobs, not sure what he will think if he witnesses someone shoving stuff up there!

Jaggy hope your DH makes it through the night my DH is going to try to get an appointment with the Dr tomorrow to discuss his sperm getting tested.

Lolli welcome and

@Chooklass haha my DH is the same, maybe I should bring him in for my next "vaginal sonogram" or whatever its called so he can see how easy he has it. Can't wait for his SA to be over and done with, but I will laugh my head off if he has a wet dream tonight even though it would result in another enforced 4 days no sex.

@Bubblegum89 CD17 at the moment (my cycles are 35 - 40 days).

I only have two apps (Glow, and this!) and dont temp or anything. Was looking at RHR but it never worked for me so I've given up. To be honest I find this app the worst as I end up daydreaming about bring a mum one day haha.

Haha, DH can't wait to get his SA over and done with, he says tonight is the "danger night".

@lolli18 welcome! Sorry to hear its been 5 years. Thats actually the same length of time my mum took to get pregnant with me. Have you been for any tests to find out why its taking so long?

Thanks everyone. Guess I'll become a lot more familiar with the correct names for the various equipment which shall be shoved up my vag! Was good for DP to see what invasive procedures us ladies have to endure - he's stopped whinging about how awful it is having to wank into a pot!!

I don't mind at all nice to talk to people in a similar situation,
I know it's long I'm about to give up soon and also as many others developed an addition to pregnancy tests and dates and all the other strange stuff ha! It's more annoying because I'm young and the doctors just say it'll happen soon or keep trying

Welcome @lolli18 - we're a very supportive (albeit sometimes a little wobbly) group. As long as you're ok with a little oversharing and the occasional F-word, you'll fit in! Five years is a heck of a time for TTC x

Il join been trying for 5 years, 2 early miscarriages but nothing bloody else happening!

I'm having an enforced month off due to DP being away. Part of me is looking forward to concentrating on myself. I'm trying to exercise more and eat and drink what I want when I want. I've dropped a few of my supplements and will be pissing on no sticks of any description this month!

Part of me is frustrated at losing a month but deep down I know it make little difference- why would this month be any different to the 23 that have gone before. So I'm trying to focus on my mental health.

One of my (very good) friends has suggested I 'relax, & it'll happen' after my mini meltdown last night. She really means well but the next person that says that to me is honestly going to be pelted with yams. What's a good response to well meaning but shitty comments?

@june I was reading your post thinking that’s such a good idea and well done you- and I’m horrified to realise that I’m too scared of time running out to give myself a month off. This can’t be healthy, or indeed helping my body be a welcoming place. I don’t know what to do for the best 😟

Was thinking this the other day june most people I know (including myself) have got pregnant at a time where they weren’t trying. I don’t have any fertility apps anymore. All I use is opks, I don’t chart or temp or log any symptoms. Haven’t done for about 5 months and this is the first month since November where I’ve started using opks again and I can honestly say I feel better for it too. Still a little bit insane but not as much as I was last year.

Haha jaggy that would be nice for the US tech! What CD are you on now? When my OH had his first SA done, he booked it himself for a Monday and I made him change it to later in the week so we could still dtd over the weekend. Hope your OH’s SA goes well :)

@pinkemi since Jan ive stopped with the cycle tracking and the constant logging of any little symptom into an app and I do feel better for it. I don’t feel as bitter about it, or as obsessed as I was before. I just keep thinking that most of the people I know got pregnant without trying. Including those that had issues the first time around. So maybe I just need to stop thinking about it so much. There must be a reason why couples who adopt/conceive through IVF then seem to go onto have kids naturally, is it because the stress has gone? So I’m trying, and largely winning the being more relaxed game. Most of the time I didn’t even know what CD or DPO I was this month. If nothing else mentally I feel better, and that’s got to be a good thing. I do know it’s not easy though, and it takes a bit of effort at first to divert your thoughts when they wander into TTC territory. But after trying everything else bar IVF I figured it’s worth a shot.

@Pinkemi I had an enforced month off in Dec when DH was away for FW. I stayed off MN, didn't use my apps and just tried to have a nice stress free month. Felt good in that I didn't have the emotional rise and fall of the TWW, but still couldn't avoid thinking about it and feeling rubbish that I couldn't concieve. In some ways it felt worse because I knew there was absolutely no hope for concieving that cycle.

So many ladies on this thread sounding so much like me at the moment. My reflexologist told me when i saw her last week that she thinks Im depressed becuase Ive let TTC consume my life so its all I think about. I was like.. you try and not think about it after a year of trying to make a baby when everyone around me seems to get pregnant from watching One born!! But i kinda see her point.

She was like.. how would you feel if you stopped your reflexology, stopped your accupuncture.. deleted all the apps.. didnt take your temp in the morning... still take your vitamins and focus on YOU for a month. What is a month in the grand scheme of things?

I felt panicked just thinking about it.

Problem is.. I KNOW ive let it take over my life.. but there is the part of me that thinks.. If im doing all these things.. at least i am doing something.. you know?

to be honest.. i keep taking my temp in the morning just to keep an eye on my cycle.. so i know when AF might arrive (and i dont ruin more knickers.)

I'm trying to focus on weight loss again.. more then TTC. i had some blood tests done on day 5 of my cycle and they came back normal (so i guess this shows at least im ovulating?) and i am waiting for my day 21 blood tests to come back. I guess if they come back normal... the reason why we arent conceiving is due to DH's low sperm count and my low AMH. (3.3)...

Private clinic recommended IVF... but i just dont know if i want to put my body through that!

Had my fourth ultrasound today, another scheduled for Friday as my follicle is still growing apparently. DH has hos sperm analysis tomorrow and isn't allowed to cum for 4 days before it (had guests over before that too so he's now terrified he'll have a wet dream as its been so long haha, scared to have to go in and admit that to the docs 😂) so I'm kinda glad I've not ovulated yet since we cant DTD.

My doctor says its fine for me to DTD tomorrow after DH has had his SA, I was worried about her doing an ultrasound when theres sperm in there haha. DH is horrified at her potentially poking about in his sperm, but I pointed out shes been poking about in me four times now so he can bugger off!

@Chooklass I think the ultrasound up the foof is a Vaginal Sonogram or something, thats what I've been getting, only just realised the name when they emailed me an appointment reminder. I still keep saying ultrasound though, dunno if its different - never been pregnant so never had either before this. Glad your appointment brought you some answers and hopefully a plan of action now. It sucks beong told there is something wrong, but at least now you can work on resolving it.

bubble hugs, Ive lost count of the amount of times that Ive planned cute ways of telling our families during the 2ww I've never quite got to buying stuff but it's been close.

Lexie I've also had a night of AF like cramping and had a good cry into the cats fur about it.

Dreamers It's always a huge disappointment waking up from dreams like that, hugs.

June I actually went to ask to go on something a couple of weeks ago following loads of research and deciding the risks are minute but when my GP looked me straight in the eye and explained it could cause heart defects I decided that I was a selfish bad person for even considering taking something that had even the tiniest risk and folded and said I would try therapy first. Got my therapist appointment tomorrow so will see if that helps enough.

Sorry everyone is feeling so shit. @pink a couple of my friends were on lose Setraline (I think that’s the name) all through TTC and pregnancy and had no issues. Please don’t suffer needlessly.

I dreamt I got af last night and then was using black sanpro. Serves me right for reading a thread about black pads before going to sleep 🙄

I’ve been thinking of giving the babygro’s away that I bought in New York. DD’s Nursery worker is pregnant with a girl so was thinking I might give them to her. But then I worry that I’m giving up too easily!

dreamers I’ve had pregnancy dreams the last two nights. First was getting a bfp, last night was having a baby. Like ttc isn’t cruel enough. Hugs to all of you

And I had a dream last night that I had three positive pregnancy tests and was so excited. I’ve been a bit grumpy this morning since I woke up.

Ah shit ladies, sorry that everyone is feeling so down right now. A big virtual hug to you all xx

(Also, how shit are the Mother’s Day adverts on the tv? They’re not helping!!)

Oh crap ladies. I hate that we’re all feeling so shit at the mo. I never would have thought TTC was such a mental strain, I mean before starting and having the continual mind fuck I could have guessed it was hard but not this much of a struggle. I’m nearly in tears this morning because I might have felt some pre af cramps.
Sending you all a big hug ladies 💐