TTC after recurrent miscarriage

Sorry ladies, have come for a mopey whinge!

All positivity has gone out of the window already and I haven't even got to the TWW! Just keep feeling that there is no point trying as it probably won't work anyway but then if we don't try it definitely won't work! A self-preservation thing really.

I went to my best friend's who has a 3 month old for dinner last night. Two other friends who are both TTC were there too. I'm not sure why but I just felt a bit disconnected from everyone. I was on call for work and had to leave to see a patient. I could have gone back but just went home instead.

I think it must be this looming due date. The testing on the pregnancy showed it would have been a boy. Last night I dreamt I had a baby boy. Then I dreamt I was caught up in a war with a load of people from my running club. We were trying to get across a field whilst a plane flew over dropping bombs.

Anyway, must pull myself together. My sister is arriving with my 2 nieces in half an hour.

Yes Lisa! Sweet of you to remember. Lovely high rise today. Boom! As my last cycle was shorter than usual I'm now due af over NYE if I don't catch before then But one week at a time!

Schnitzel, I can only agree with Lisa, your feelings, all of them, are understandable and make sense. Please know we're here for you too Who cares what anyone else thinks, if and when you're ready to try again that's what you do. If it's this cycle, go for it and just play things by ear, if you need some time, wait till you both feel ready. It's a bloody rollercoaster, having children already doesn't mean it's not. Keep chatting if it helps.

Sorry, after that heroic attempt at personals I then dropped back into lurking - I'm currently CD8 and have already mentally written off anything happening any time soon, let alone a 'cycle', because ...

I'm just being a wimp! Scared I won't ovulate and scared I won't get pregnant but also scared that I will get pregnant and then scared I'll lose it ... and ... trying not to wish time away. Acutely aware of how lucky I am to have children and guilty that I'm distracted from enjoying them. Aware that most people would just say stop trying and make the most of what you've got.

Not great company! A bad buddy when you are all going through your own stuff. I'm here and rooting for you though.

I want to echo what the others say fox. Please stay as long as you feel you need to.

Bertie, sorry AF showed up but I'm glad you had a good weekend with some booze and ciggies. Fingers crossed for the flat.

Lisa, I hope you're doing ok.

We're on the train back to Malaga to catch our flight. Hoping for a smoother journey home. Think I need to be good and cut back on the booze consumption now we're TTC again. Well, at least until Christmas anyway!

Okay, not a massive rise! But it's up. And ov symptoms have all gone. Shame today's wasn't higher.

Had a big rise yesterday and not sure about today. Temp is .01 lower today but still basically the same. Hoping for x hairs tomorrow.

So think ov was the day before yesterday.

Feeling a bit crap today, weird cramps, dizziness and nausea. Don't think I'm ill but definitely off colour. Working from home which is cosier than the office.

Good luck with the checks Bertie. Fx for you.

Yeah defo happy for this to be a safe place for early PG after MC too - there is also a PG after MC thread in pregnancy, in case you hadn't found it.

No update on flat yet, we did put in some forms for a credit check, now feeling anxious that we're going to fail that (Germany is very strict). But we will see.

Oh Foxtrot, bless you, it's not easy. You're welcome here as long as you like but I have a good feeling about your pregnancy x

Couldn't agree with you more Lisa. I'm not wishing time away but it feels good to keep track.

Sorry about AF Bertie But sounds like a brilliant weekend, glad you had fun.

How are you doing Fox?

How long now till scan Lisa?

It was a deep stab in the left side of my front, sort of inside my left hip bone area. Found a position it didn't happen in and all was fine yesterday and dtd again last night but it kept happening which was weird.

Got a big temp rise today. I'm hopelessly addicted to this sort of reassurance... Oh well. Whatever helps.

I'm back from my weekend - disappointingly there was no testing in airport toilets but I did do one at my cousin's house, bought a blue dye test by mistake and had to talk myself out of seeing squinters because they really weren't there. Did manage to get some wild drinking and smoking in and then started AF on the way home so my instinct was right.

Loads lisa, all the usual stuff.

Had a weird pain yesterday while dtd. I don’t want to be too graphic or specific but has anyone had pain in the ovary area while dtd around when you’re ovulating?

How are you doing lisa?

Hope you had a fantastic weekend away bertie

Wow keepon, what a mission! Hope you can rest and relax now, and have a wonderful break.

Nothing to report here, was expecting a spike this morning post ov but it's dropped even lower and it's been very low so far this cycle anyway so not sure what's going on.

Weekend was alright thanks.

How's everyone?

Thanks Lisa. Our trip has not got off the best start! Our flight to Malaga had to divert and make an emergency landing in France. We then had to wait for a new plane to come from Gatwick so we missed our train to Seville which was the last one. We stayed a night in Malaga last night but by the time we arrived everywhere was closing so we had the contents of a vending machine for 'dinner'. Then got up at 5.45 to try and get the first train but it was full so have spent the last hour killing time in the station. DH has lost his rag and declared that he wants to go home. So all in all not very conducive to TTC! Fortunately we got one in yesterday morning before we set off. Hopefully we'll be there by lunchtime by which point we will be desperately in need of beer and tapas!