Ttc after miscarriage thread #8

Ahh user that might be a good thing though as the hospital can do a lot more tests than the gp. So hopefully find a little bubba in there. Miami that sounds like a good plan you have to do what's right for you at the time. It would be great if someone could say exactly what was what though and if and when things would happen. I'm in to spiritualism after my late dp and got told a lot of things that were true they also said I'd have a boy and a girl so i am praying that it true too.

Doctor's was a complete waste of time she looked at me gone out when I said I had a positive test at the weekend and now negative but only spotting.
Referred me back to the hospital for a scan to check pcos?!! What!

Completely fed up tonight! Still no AF and BFN argh. I'm in a why has this happened to me mood

Ah ok. Put like that it all makes sense. I'd love to foster but my dp would never even consider it at all. bertie that's good that your sil was able to hide it

Oh yes, that makes sense too.

No, it's to do with you being able to concentrate on the adopted child, because they are undergoing a huge upheaval and need so much support to help them through it.

They also want to make sure you're serious about adopting and aren't just going into it as a snap reaction to the pain of miscarriage/infertility. They want to know you're sure about adoption as a thing in its own right, rather than seeing it as a "back up option" if that makes sense.

That said, SIL found out she was pregnant towards the later stages of the adoption process and they were so invested in it at that point, they didn't want to give up so they had to hide it from the social workers! Luckily for them it all worked out really well, they have three children all together, all lovely kids.

You could definitely go to an information evening though.

No I don't think so. I think what they understandably need to avoid is people pulling out far down the process because they've fallen pregnant. I imagine once you've adopted you can do what you like.

Really keep i didn't realise that it was so strict. So are they saying that you could never have your own children if you adopt?

I'm not sure fluff. From the reading I've done so far it seems a lot of the agencies want you to be at least 6 months on from your last miscarriage and expect you to stop actively trying and use contraception. I don't think it is an unreasonable thing for them to ask, I just don't think I'm at that stage yet. I think we should keep trying until November, at which point we will have been trying for 3 years, and then re-evaluate. I guess we could maybe go to an information evening in the mean time.

Thanks fluff x

Smurf fingers crossed your gp will have some answers for you and be able to help. anne don't rule anything out yet i was a week late when I got bfp with my dd i had all the symptoms but kept getting bfn i went to the walk in as i was experiencing a lot of stabbing pains really bad they told me it was ibs good job i didn't listen as she gave me meds and i refused to take them good job as could of caused major problems with dd so ended up in a and e and she said i was pregnant but levels were low but like you i had every symptom going she is now healthy so fx.
keep could you start the process but keep trying? I was talking to a lady the other day she adopted 2 boys because they thought they couldn't have children she now has a healthy 10m old. Also a woman at work had two attempts of ivf fail they decided to have a break from it all and concentrate on their wedding she got caught naturally very soon after. She put so much pressure on herself during ivf

Sorry about the BFN Anne.

Welcome smurf. I'm so sorry to hear about your losses.

I've got myself in a bit of a mope this afternoon. DH said last night that he's been thinking more about adoption recently and as that's such a long process maybe we should start looking into it more. I'm not ready to give up on having our own child yet and I know he isn't either but how the hell do you ever decide when to stop? He's really down about things at the moment and I just don't know what to do to help.

I haven't fluff.... Got bfn this morning. Was going to wait till Friday but couldn't have felt more pregnant yesterday and I was convinced!

Nearly threw up in the car on the way home, off everything apart from crackers and peppermint tea, too tired to do anything and I was asleep by half 8. Crazy painful boobs and so bloated.

But nothing! No af, and it's late now, and no bfp. I shall gratefully accept cake and a cuddle

Hi can I join? Yesterday I had surgical management for my second miscarriage.
I'm 27 years old and I came off the pill about a year ago when my husband and I decided we were ready to try for a baby but that we wouldn't overly try just be open to it happening.
We got our first positive in July and then found out that our booking appointment (about 9weeks) that our little baby was only measuring 6weeks 4 days. So a mmc. Tried medical management but didn't work ended up with surgical management for it also.
Then think I maybe had a chemical pregnancy in December as something wasn't quite right and eventually I tested and got a positive then a week later a negative. I was bleeding heavily at the time of tests so knew it wasn't really a positive that was sticking about.
Bleeding continued for a bit and I seemed to have af 3 times in a month so I'd booked a docs appointment to talk about it. Didn't tell her about pregnancy tests at first as I'm terrified of docs and freeze so she said to come back for a smear the following week. I was more terrified of that so the following week I told her about the previous tests and she said prob a chemical pregnancy and she wanted to do a test to be sure it was negative.
I did their test was told negative and as I'm walking out of the room got called back to be told it was a very faint positive so I was referred for scan at epu later that week. Turns out their tests are really sensitive as I must have only just conceived so couldn't see much. Went back two weeks later it was definitely a pregnancy and. Growing. Appointment booked for 2 more weeks time. I had some bleeding on the Sunday after scan and phoned epu so got a new scan appointment on Friday of that week and it show a tiny baby at 6weeks 0days with a strong heartbeat. It was so amazing to see. I had a small about of bleeding again 2 days later but it was gone in half an hour and went back for previously planned scan that Friday when we should have been 7 weeks. It showed that the baby had grown 6weeks 6days so only a day out but the heartbeat had slowed down. went back on Monday this week and they confirmed no growth from Friday and no longer a heartbeat and booked me in for erpc yesterday.
We seem to get to the 6week mark no problem but then it all goes wrong. I'm going to the gp this Tuesday. I'm just wondering is there anything I should ask for or I dunno...
Believe it or not the gp appointment was booked when I got the viable pregnancy letter from epu 2 weeks ago as I was told to bring it to my gp. I have 3 epu letters to bring to gp plus now one from hospital yesterday as it has taken from the 14th February to actually get an appointment. 3 times I got told "nope sorry no appointments left phone back in a few days"
I know they don't like to do anything before 3 miscarriages but I just feel like it's happened about the same point both times is there something wrong with me that's causing it. Surely they could do something to check rather that having to go through it all again. We want to start ttc again but we know we need to wait until bleeding stops after erpc and supposed to wait until first af but it seems so far away...my mum thinks we should wait a couple of months to let my body heal and get back to normal both physically and emotionally and I understand where she's coming from but I really don't want to wait that long. I certainly don't want to go back on pill or otherwise. Our first baby would have been due on the first April. This one we have just lost due date would have been my birthday in October. I've already instructed a friend that we are going out that day!
Sorry this has turned out to be a way longer post than I meant and I've rambled on a bit :-/

anne have you refrained from testing?

Me too anne i will stick around. I want to see you lovely ladies bet your happy endings. Without you all i don't know where I'd be now. Wish i knew you all so i could cuddle you all and give you cake. Thank you for being kind.
Not sure if it's a sticky one all i can do is hope.
On a tmi note my wind is awful. So uncomfortable.

Really pleased and relieved it went well.

Please please look after yourself. Wishing you a totally uneventful pregnancy! And don't leave us if you want to hang around!

Thanks anne i told him this morning and to be fair he wasn't that bad. But he has says he's getting the snip no matter what happens as I'm too fertile.
Thanks harriet I've had mild cramps thought af was coming but it hasn't. Thanks agnu he broke my heart when he changed his mind and said we couldn't try again so I'm hoping this is it and will be my happy ending. And hopefully you'll all get your happy endings too.

Oh my god fluff, what a miraculous bit of news, sending you a hug, your head must be all over the place

Normally I'd say you need to tell him asap but I think it's better for you to have a couple of days to process the news yourself tbh and have an idea if what you're going to tell him and how you're going to proceed depending on what he says. Please keep talking to us if it helps.

Good you've managed to get an appointment for this evening user, hope the doc can shed some light.

Best of luck with your appointment swim. You've had such a grim time, really hope they can help.

Wow fluff! That's so exciting. I'm sure your DH will come round. Fingers crossed for a healthy pregnancy.

I'm cd 24 today, but only 3dpo as ovulated late after my mc. Will test on 18 march probably but not sure we had enough sex so not holding out too much hope. I did have extreme ovulation pain this month though and have had gentle cramps ever since which is new for me - has anyone had this?

Good luck with the appt user hope you can find out what's happening!

Hope it sticks this time fluffy. It's so hard when you want another but your DP isn't on board.

I don't have any plans to test yet. AF is due on Saturday so if I get as far as Monday I may test then but I can see myself getting to 6+ weeks & still being too scared to POAS! I'm feeling less nauseated today but I'm breathless weird response I've had to hormones before & a bit crampy, maybe... I did go to the GP before Christmas with unexplained cramps that she thought was just stress so it's plausible the stress of this has brought it on again... I'm feeling pretty pessimistic though.

Hi girls

Congrats fluff hope it goes ok today.

I am CD29 not sure DPO vause I don't know when I ovulated lol. But app says 5 days to af but I have lower cramping so think she's on her way😠

User not at all. If you didn't test you wouldn't know what's going on. Let us know how you get on.
Well told dp he didn't go mad but did say he's going to get the snip as i catch to easy. So this is my last hope of having my second baby. As i know he will not change his mind at all now. I'm so scared. I hope it sticks.

I have rang the doctors and managed to get an appt tonight so see what they say.

I had spotting over the weekend, felt a bit eugh so tested Sunday with a FR and got the positive I posted on here.
Used a CB digital on Monday and that came up not pregnant.
Had more spotting yesterday, thought it was start of AF but nothing came of it. Tested again this morning and it's negative.

When I write it down I sound like a crazy lady with all the testing!!!

Also user the Spotting could of been implantation bleeding.