Thread 23. TTC #1 - New Year, New Opportunities. Let's keep those BFPs rolling in!

Thanks for all the sympathy girls. I agree they deal with things differently and I know it gets to him, so maybe this was a way of him coping with it. I just wish it wasn't a way that compromised sperm quality!

We've mainly been texting as he was so drunk on the phone it annoyed me last night. I've just asked him how he could do this when he sees how much it gets to me every month. He is very apologetic, promising to stop drinking etc.

I really just hope it doesn't affect his sperm, especially when it takes three months for changes to take affect. Do you think one binge drink is not going to make much difference? He has another SA this month, which I thought he would be more consciously getting geared up for.

sk1pper have you tried Inofolic for PCOS? Just google it and you will get the low down.

Kath - I'll bring it up at my next meeting with my gynaecologist I think. It happens around ovulation so it's the functional cyst I think. They must be extra large and leak fluid. That would explain why I didn't have any on my ultrasound as I had that during AF. Can't find anything online that can explain why this might happen.

Ugh Jam, I have a lot of sympathy. DH and I had words after we spent a night on A&E because it was impossible to tell if he had concussion or was just hammered (a bit of both in the end...). He has cut down a lot on those big nights out but he does still do it from time to time. I think he's not very good at accepting change / he's not 21 anymore and he is still trying to cling to the remnants of that carefree lifestyle. Whilst I know he wants children, I think he's a bit less motivated than I am because he doesn't want to have to grow up. Sorry, that was long and all about me but rest assured you are not alone. for you, must be so hard when you're in the midst of grieving and funerals too.

Orange, welcome to the BFN but no AF club. I hope you get that BFP soon!

EJ, I'm sorry about the lack of ovulation this month. What a bugger. Forgive me if I've missed it but are you already speaking to a GP etc?

Sk1pper, that sounds so painful and really strange, as you say to have nothing and then it happen twice so quickly. Are you going back to the docs?

for you Sk1pper... don't give up Hun... PMA PMA PMA xxxx

kwick I should have AF now really but because I was on the pill before and with my endometriosis I think my body is doing its own thing... or I didn't ovulate when I thought I did...
pyjamas If I ovulated when I thought I did I am 14 dpo. Otherwise I am between 14 and 7 dpo. I usually have cramps before ovulation but they lasted a bit more than a week up to 02/01 when I should have ovulated on 24/12. I'm new at TTC so still figuring things out.

I'll wait and see how this week goes.

Nothing really to add in what others have said jam but - funerals are tough anyway, hope today is a better day for you.

Sorry about your cysts sk1pper - hope they clear up soon!

Jam - as others have said, I really think this is how guys "deal" with stuff. There brains are wired completely differently to ours and why they may think one night is completely justified, they don't stop to think how it will impact their partner. I'm not sure if your OH is much of a talker but this is something you need to straighten out face to face. Dont go into full blown rage straight away, ask him calmly why he did it and you may get more of a straight answer. Sorry you're having to deal with this right now, it's bad bad timing. Hope things wii your mum go okay xx

I'm struggling to get out of bed this morning, severe pain in my lower abdomen. A cyst definitely ruptured again. I find it a bit suspiscious that I never had a cyst rupture in 13 continuous months of TTC, then in the space of 4 months I have two bad ones with an ultrasound in the middle that said my ovaries were clear. It doesn't make sense. I'm getting absolutely physically drained by this and the horrendously heavy and painful periods. It's like my body is trying to tell me I'm never meant to have kids

I really need to re read my posts for spelling and grammer before posting

Oh London i would be lived too in your position. Maybe he just needed it. Times have been tough for you both and perhaps it was his way of having a blow out. I don't think one night should have had to much effect on his sperm though.

I'm in a similar position. My dh know that ttc is seriously brealing me. He drinks above nhs guidelines regularly. He has "a few beers" as his way of switching off as he has a stressful job. Probably only has a few nights a week he doesn't drink. He ackowledges he should drink less & often says he will cut down soon but it's become a habit. He's currently doing dry January & assures me this is the start of the change but i'm not convinced. Like you i often wonder wonder why i've cut out sugar, caffeine, alcohol. Why i Poas to check my ovulation & have given up my my jacuzzi & steam room treat after yoga but he's doing something known to harm the swimmers.

I didnt ovulate for sure this month despite my opk & ewcm so thats a huge blow. Just got to hope af appears in a week now.

Jam I had something similar with my DH - we had our initial fertility tests booked in the morning last month which we shelled out about £500 for and he went out and got shitfaced the night before. I was livid - we had spent lots of money on tests, I was getting poked with needles and having things shoved up my hoo ha, while all he had to do was not drink and have a wank at the clinic. He knew I was displeased! Is your DH feeling sheepish this morning?

bluebird and binky

Sorry about BFN as well orange - what dpo are you?

9dpo here - had a few stabby pains yesterday on right hand side - but looked at last month's chart and had that at same time last month, so not reading into it.

They also in my experience deal with things differently too. TTC puts a strain on the relationship that is really really is unreal.

london poor you sometimes though and this is absolutely no excuse whatsoever but men don't take things the same way women do. They dong absorb information the same or use it the same way. I think when you are home you need to chat to him tell him how you feel. Also wrote down what has upset you x

Kwick - thanks for your PMA reference my 'pregnancy symptoms' ... yeah I've read them all ... it's hard not to convince yourself you've got them ... but I think the head ache and shitty taste are related to this damn cold which I've still got this morning ... last night was horrible - sweating in bed and feeling like I've done twelve rounds with mike Tyson (think that's the name of a boxer)! And still haven't managed to have sex with oh who is also with cold (but obviously man flu is much worse).

Hey - London ... I don't want to make excuses for your partner but he is undoubtedly feeling the strain of tTC too I'm sure and getting shit faced is (wrongly) just his way of dealing with it. I know it's easier said than done but I'd let him off this once - sounds like he doesn't make a habit of doing it. I'm sure he's feeling worse than you this morning and has a horrible hangover. I do empathise with how your feeling - my ex husband was always drinking so I do get it. Good luck - hope you kiss and make up quickly xxxxx

flash hang in there honey! Your time will come.

jem what a dick splat (if I may be so bold and curse about your OH)!!! I hope you can have a good chat with him once he is sober... in the meantime perhaps you can torture him a little whilst he is hungover?

Orange sorry about BFN - when is AF due?

Slept so much better last night... actually had a very erotic dream

My MN app still has the Christmas emojis... when do they take those down?

Have family coming round for lunch today - first time since September 2015!!! Which is terrible!!! They have demanded I make my signature dish of macaroni cheese!

jam

My oh drank so much over Christmas and new year, and then last week as a friend was staying. He had agreed to cut down to one bottle of wine for the weekend, but 2 drunk so far. We'll see if he sticks to his promise not to drink tonight.

I did a FRER this morning and it is BFN.
Still no signs of AF so will test again next week if nothing!

London that's a horrible thing to do. Did you ask him why?

Ahead of the funeral*

So cross. Am up north staying at my gran's helping mum for a few days ahead of the family. DH has stayed at home, gone out this evening and got shit faced.

HE is the one who has had the sub fertility result, not me and yet I'm the one blue in the face trying everything I can to possibly to get pregnant. He watches me cry , he sees my frustration and sadness and desperation to get pregnant. He sees my period come every single month for over a year and how it floors me every time. And yet he can just go out and get fucked, knowing that it takes three months for improvements to be made to sperm.

I'm so angry and upset. I just feel like he doesn't care 😔

Massive hugs bluebird and flash 💐💐💐💐

macs hello 👍
I haven't had such pain as I have with my kidney. Thanks for the well wishes.

Can't see this month being my month. Feel as if the planets have aligned against us.

Thanks for the welcome 👋🏼. Maybe shared a little too much about my stalker tendencies

Sorry bluebird and binky

binky definitely get your thyroid checked out. I was hyperthyroid about 6 years ago and it appeared out of nowhere so can just develop for no reason. They should do a blood test without much fuss and ask for a print out of the results. Like kwick said, what your GP thinks is ok might still affect ttc.

kathrino there's loads of stories about late bfps so you're not out yet

Lovely list jam. Had a total meltdown last night. Spotting for the last couple of days and then a bright red bleed last night. Af supposedly not supposed to be until next Thursday. Think maybe some of its stress. I'm so worried about ttc etc. Cried for two hours that my body isn't working properly/too risky to ttc, even though I have no idea if it would make a difference to getting pregnant with spotting. Plus I think the sore boobs and spotting reminded me of what my cycle was like when I got pregnant.

Sorry to anyone who's struggling. It's just so much harder than I ever thought it would be.

I'm so sorry bluebird. Take as much time as you need. We'll be here if you need to talk at all