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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Ttc after late miscarriage. Let's support each other. X

85 replies

molly29 · 30/08/2016 20:46

I was finally pregnant with my third child after 5 years of ttc. I was 22 weeks when I had a bleed and found out our little girl was dead.
I am 33 and desperate to fall pregnant and trying to grieve.
Just wondered if anyone else is in a similar position and we could help each other along?

OP posts:
Original poster
molly29 · 31/08/2016 20:16

I feel that way too. But I have to try.
It's nice to have someone to talk to who is in a very similar position.

OP posts:
kimblesj · 31/08/2016 19:56

No, I have pcos, it has taken anywhere from 3 months to 2 years to conceive for us. I kind of feel like my body is back to normal ( whatever my normal is) although periods are still really heavy and still quite painful since ds4 was born. We have decided we don't want to "ttc" in the stressful way as it has really eaten away at us as a couple before now, got quite fixated on symptoms and the right time etc. AF started today for me so the next month we will "try" and hope for the best. I just have this feeling that we aren't meant to have anymore and it's a horrible thing to feel

Original poster
molly29 · 31/08/2016 18:43

Well we hadnt been careful since losing her. But properly trying the last two months with ovulation tests. Although I really feel my body is back to normal this month. Scared to leave because it took us so long to fall last time.
I have been really healthy with what we are eating and been taking pregnacare for several months. Due on on Saturday but did an early test already and it was negative. I'm already obsessed with it again.
Did you fall easily?

OP posts:
kimblesj · 31/08/2016 18:07

So is this the first month you are ttc? Are you doing anything specifically or just seeing how it goes for now? I feel like I'm being extra careful about what I eat and drink and trying to be super healthy and conscious of things.

Original poster
molly29 · 31/08/2016 17:38

I know, I always say that, I wish we had a crystal ball.
My daughter has felt it the hardest, she's 10, it's their first proper experience with death, my son is 7 and a lot has gone over his head.
I wish so much that we both get our happy ending.
My husband was very upset, but he said it's different for them, he has always felt he becomes their dad when he holds them. He is blindly optimistic it will all be ok.

OP posts:
kimblesj · 31/08/2016 17:25

I can relate exactly!
Husband is doing ok now, was very upset to begin with, but focused on wanting to ttc straight away. We have 3 living sons too and they have been OK as a rule, middle one probably the most affected by it all. We visit his grave regularly and that helps the children.
Like you, we just don't feel complete but the thought of any of it happening again is too much to take. I want someone to predict the outcome for me so I know what to do and when.

Original poster
molly29 · 31/08/2016 08:53

Morning.
I have ups and downs. Days when I feel like myself again and then days when I can't believe how awful I feel.
They couldn't find a reason why she died. I gave birth to her 15th April.
I feel a mixture of trying to be positive that i will fall pregnant and be ok and the fear it could happen again. Also terrified i won't fall pregnant again. And then I get just so angry that this has happened and it's so unfair.
I have trouble being around pregnant people, people that I feel may say they are pregnant and newborns.
We had tried for so long and finally felt I could complete our family and move on. Some people have said I should stop trying as I have two beautiful children already, but I can't fill this hole that I need another child.
I don't want to replace her, I desperately wish she had been ok.
I also feel the pressure of the age gap between them.
How is your family coping?

OP posts:
kimblesj · 31/08/2016 07:30

I have had some ups and downs, we lost our son because my waters broke at 15 weeks which caused lots of other problems so we had 7 weeks of hell before he was born. The paranoia that it could all happen again is the forefront of my mind.
How about you? When did you lose your daughter, how do you feel about ttc?
I'm really mixed, I don't want to replace him, just have that yearning for another baby and that our family isn't complete yet

Original poster
molly29 · 31/08/2016 00:10

hi,
I'm nervous too. I have such mixed feelings. I desperately want to be pregnant but I know this is the first hurdle.
How have you been coping?

OP posts:
kimblesj · 30/08/2016 23:06

Hi,
We lost our son in April at nearly 22 weeks and have just decided to ttc. Really nervous about the whole thing tbh

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