TTC #1 Thread 15. Don't. Trust. The. Boobs. ( . )( . )

Roll up roll up ... We are rather out of date

JUNE
Wingingit - 15
Hankpeach - 18
Hep - 19th
Lemonlimetonic - 19
Bluebird - 23
Pug - 26
Marmite - 30
5tardusty - 30
Fxskip - 30
Moose
Nicky
Violet
Nxxp

JULY
Inspectorpenguin - 2
Kathrino - 2
Snarky - 9
Lovelyfishy - 13
Jem - 15
Kav 18
Ema - 21
Kat

TBC / MIA
Kwick
Theorchard
Island
Ctulhoo
Crazycatlady
Neonninja
Pigsbum
Rosey
Alice
Celizabe
Snowdog

GRADS
mayago
Rosie
Ktt
Twinky
ipatches
Ni
Vix
Skylucy
Ever

Skip ! Lol at bossy ovia 😂

fx I am ! I just find it funny.

Jem I was having issues with the app too so maybe thats what happened. Yes please post the list - we must be due some more BFPs!!

marmite relax, give it a couple of days and test again if no AF. I know how you feel, although I am 5 days into my longest cycle yet, I just feel like its not going to be my month.

Hep just ignore her, she's so full of shit. She's in a big huff with me now, and has gone all 'i'm not telling you when FW is until you have a period'. Cheers mate.

I guess it means we've found the good guys if sex isn't their ultimate goal and they actually have genuine emotions about this fatherhood stuff and us.... Although that didn't feel like that last night!!
it just drives me potty, we talk about trying and he makes me buy him those bloody expensive conception vitamins for men and then on the actual day it matters, there's no DTD! It feels like it's the same month after month! I don't feel as though we've even had one month where I feel we've done it enough to give it w good shot! Once is all it takes though I suppose....

Hello Alice, I've had an internal scan and found it absolutely fine. Not painful at all. Good luck with it let us know how you get on.

Marmite - any luck this morning with your IC?

Oh moose sorry it worked out like that. We've had a few months where instead of DTD we have argued and I've cried. It can be so fraught. I hope things calm down and you can enjoy some closeness tonight.

Snarky couldn't agree more re gender and DTD. I have way more of a sex drive than my DH too xx

All our lives we've heard the ridiculous rhetoric that men just want to have sex all the time, that they can't control themselves from jumping on anything that moves, when actually their desires are just as complicated as ours. It's damaging for them because they think that these feelings make them less manly, and it's damaging for us because it makes us feel like there's something wrong with us.

Couldn't agree more.

Thanks so much everyone, can't believe how wonderfully supportive you all are. peaches, that's sort of what we've been doing, but it's so hard to get the dates out of my head, my cycles have been pretty regular over the past month or so, so not a lot of calculation is required! He used to go and see a counsellor, but it didn't really help and all his friends who are parents became so by accident! I'm so sorry AF got you :(

I think you might be right moose going on holiday over fw would be an excellent idea :) I'm going to get planning. I'm so sorry that that happened to you, I know how awful that feels, no matter how much you've told yourself not to worry about it. All our lives we've heard the ridiculous rhetoric that men just want to have sex all the time, that they can't control themselves from jumping on anything that moves, when actually their desires are just as complicated as ours. It's damaging for them because they think that these feelings make them less manly, and it's damaging for us because it makes us feel like there's something wrong with us.

CD 14 today. After saying I wasn't going to even look this month, did an OPK yesterday (just for the joy of peeling on a stick!) was pretty positive, so tried it on with DP. He said no as he felt "rough" he obviously didn't know it was fw as I now keep that from him to stop his wobbles, so then I end up in tears, and neither of us end up wanting to do it! Lol I swear having sex used to be so easy!!!!
So think again this month is out for us... We did cd8 and that's it, unless it happens tonight but after last night not sure either of us will feel like it!
I was so sure I'd be calm and not bothered this month, loads going on with work and buying a house so it would be a bad month to fall anyway but once fw rocks up, the inner Baby monster is unleashed!! Ha ha

So I'm back... Didn't manage to have a month off dtd once and for once I'm hoping for AF! I'll be in two part time jobs next cycle and be able to claim two lots of SMP.. If I do end up getting upduffed

Apps - I'm a die hard fertility friend fan, I feel it's scientific.

Snarky My DH has similar problems, just barely manages it half the time. I blame perfectionism.

I've got to have an internal scan... Kwick is it horrible?

I kind of what them to find cysts on my ovaries so they can fix it and then I can have a baby.

Hi Peaches still here !
minimal heartburn (it is at least correlated with stress).
new symptom: boob-ache

skip - my app is telling me i am entering FW again ..... err.....

Well I'm out! Crashed out after a 25 day cycle wtf!! oh well, I have a party on Sunday so no guilt over having a glass or two I suppose.....

snarky anxiety is a horrible thing. Do you think you could change to having a non committed couple of months were you just wing it, no pressure and just have sex as and when you both feel like it? I agree it would be great for him to be able to vent somewhere like we have here. What measures does he use when he feels like this? Is there anyone he talks to in general? When you feel deep in the grip of anxiety it's so hard to feel and see the positive in anything.

hep how are things today?

jem im with you, apps are for recording basic information only! skip yes, I don't need any other forms of meddling in my life, electronic or otherwisemore especially the Ovia bitch! For such purposes I have always used period tracker just so I had an idea when af would be. So I just continued with that and like you jem I use the note section to record any info. Oh, the days of ignorant bliss thinking it was one shag and boom a baby

skip did you come across anything interesting in your wander through the threads? (Not that I'm being nosey or anything)

I often find I stop getting notifications about new posts so go on to check the thread and there's been loads

Haha sorry jem - maybe one for dinner?!
Might try another IC tomorrow and save Frer for few days yet! In my heart I think it will be AF but we shall see. Last cycle was 36 days so may not even be late yet, was just hoping cycle had shortened!

Oh god marmite!! Fingers crossed love. When will you crack out the frer???

I now want a bacon avo sambo so much...

Ooh there's a problem with the app - not letting me post - I've had to come to the desktop version to post. Possibly why it's so quiet!

Hi all,
Just thought I'd pop in briefly from Italy! Oh I love avocados guys, can't get enough of them! On toast, with scrambled eggs, as homemade guacamole, in salads, in bacon sarnies!!
Have been having lots of delicious food here (but no avocados)
CD33. Caved and POAS this morning seeing as I'd managed to sleep all night without weeing for a change! Just an IC (have got a Frer stashed for later in holiday if needs be...) it was bfn (although, if I held it to one side, in the light, sort of squinted ~and stood on one leg~ thought perhaps there was the tiniest hint of a sort of almost line..)

winging love your shot glass strategy!! I grab a plastic cup from the water cooler and casually sleek to the loo with it down by my side. Usually go to another floor in the office too. It is a minefield!! But there's a weird part of me that enjoys it too?! Bit of excitement in my day haha.

skip it is a bit quiet isn't it? Come back old members!! I'll post the list to see if it jobs some memories.

On the app debate, I joined this thread back in January, when I assumed one swift shag would knock me up effortlessly. Everyone on this thread was complaining about ovia so much that I never went there. I have used Pink Pad to track my periods for years - it's very basic but does indicate when you're most likely to be fertile and when your next period is due. It's got a lot of data on me so I'm sticking with it. Plus there is a notes bit for each day, so I put some observations in during the TWW - partly to keep me sane the following month so when I fart and think I am obviously pregnant with twins I can check back and remember this happened every month for the last 6 months and no I'm probably still not pregnant!

ah wingingit you've learned early not to trust the meddling old aunt that is Ovia. Only give her the basics, and do not listen when she insists you are upduffed. I have attempted Fertility Friend but found it frustrating to update 2 apps, and I already had a relationship with Ovia (albeit a poor one) so she won. Good work on the OPKs, I gave up some time ago once I realised they don't guarantee ovulation just the hormones, but lots of people have sworn by them so best of luck to you.

Where is everyone today? I found myself reading some obscure mn AIBU forums out of sheer boredom...

Lol! What apps do people use out of interest?

I have ovia but only used it for two months and i admit I'm already ignoring the fw days it gives etc and just using it as a record to chart temps and dtd etc.

I'm now opking again and my mission this month is to end it confident that I actually ovulated. So as I had suspected my 7pm testing wasn't optimum i went to work today armed with 'kit' to test at work at 2pm each day in the form of freezer bags and plastic shot glasses from poundland.

My first triumph was successfully timing my slot on the way back from lunch (so it didn't look odd that I had my handbag with me) such that the loos were empty so no worry about rustling!
And second triumph was successfully aiming for the shot glass with no spillage!

Thought old-timey Ovia users would appreciate this: I opened the app just...well, for no reason, and it said 'Cycle day 1 - you're on your period' and I thought 'oh, am I? Ah well, there you go then'. Took me a beat to realise I was NOT on my period, it was just old Ovibitch trying to CONTROL ME as USUAL. Feel v grumpy right now.

snarky this is a tough situation to be in for sure. Are you using a tracker app to determine your fertile week? My thinking is that you could mess with your cycle length to make it look like FW is ages away, then say 'oh, look, I'm not fertile right now so lets just get jiggy for the fun of it' and see what happens?

snarky he sounds really sweet! Is it worth trying to have a couple of months off trying?? (Or at least say to him that you are?!) Maybe book a holiday and say, oh I don't want to be pregnant on it, let's not try until afterwards - and book the holiday through FW - without telling him! Would he maybe relax a bit more then? A bit sneaky though perhaps????

Thanks everyone, it's pretty frustrating, particularly as it's compounded every month when AF arrives and we both feel devastated. He gets so upset with himself.

Thanks jem and moose, I think we definitely need a holiday to takes us out of this for a bit. The trouble isn't that he's not aroused, it's that his brain rebels against it. He won't let me touch him when he's in full-blown anxious mode. I can spoon him, but no stroking any part of him, he'll just gently hold my hands still if I try. I think I need to get to him before we go to bed, maybe take his brain by surprise so it doesn't have a chance to spoil things by flipping out with a hundred negative thoughts (that sentence makes me sound like a rapist- I don't mean take him by surprise in a non consensual way, I mean change things up a bit so that he doesn't have the chance to over think things and go into a tailspin).

It's really comforting to know that we're not the only ones going through this ridiculousness. You're right lovely, he's going to be the best dad in the world, and then this will all have been worthwhile 🙂

No chance of me getting any tonight with the football result!!!