Thread : Lucky Number 13 take 2. TTC#1 The one where AF can kiss our arse!

Maybe I will explore the doula thing... but it might be nice to have someone in there that I know and love... I keep on joking with my nephew that it will be him!!!

suchajem sorry I did not get involved in job offer debacle earlier... I appreciate it is a very hard decision to take. I know that the maternity pay and sabbatical leave things play a part but ultimately where will you feel more fulfilled? Which job excites you the most? I work in HR and I often see people that "quit and stay" - they are unhappy but stay on.
I am hanging in with my current employer but I know that I may not be able to return once baby is born as they may not be able to give me the flexibility I will need in the future.
At the end of the day I would advise you to follow your heart as this will drive your passion and ultimate job fulfillment.

My mum would be the last person I'd want in there! I love her but she sounds like your mum Kwik she even moans at obem when a women screams.

Are you closer to a decision jem?

Hope everyone has a good weekend!!

Morning lovely ladies. No news here...AF just peeing off! Who's due to test next?

Kwick you could hire a doula! I think my OH will be traumatised by it...but hey I'm sure I will be too! He's gonna be there whether he likes it or not!

I really don't know how my DP would come going through labour. He made me switch over during Rachels "labour" on friends the least realistic labour ever!! I think he is more scared that I am about it!

Right ladies I had a good 18 hours of wallowing and my PMA hat is back on! Despite technically going in to cycle 5 last month was my first cycle of us both being in the same country for FW and therefore being able to try at the right time. So I'm being a bit more realistic about how long it's taking us because it really hasn't been that long!

Positives are I can have a drink at upcoming weddings and I won't be having a Christmas baby. Ordering by CB digital ovulation thing today cos I just really want to know that I do ovulate. Also I am now on an average of 26 day cycle so I want to check when I am ovulating cos I have a feeling it may be earlier than i think.

And with that essay I think it's time to hit the shops and get some wine and chocolate in for tonight. My fingers are still crossed for anyone getting ready to test

Say the word Kwick and we'll all be there! God, could you imagine the chaos of this thread plus graduates in the delivery room with you? Half taking notes and the other half giving advice! Raging hormones all round lol.

My DH will be there (unless he faints or something) but I know my mum will be chomping at the bit outside the door. She'd be there in a second if I let her but no idea how helpful she would be!

Sounds like mum is best option from that - but perhaps with some education on your birth expectations / levels of pain management!

Is there a good friend who has been through it maybe who could be a good alternative?

Or how about cousin plus mum? I guess you've got a while to mull it over.

suchajem I suppose I could ask my mum -but I am not sure I want her there... She had me with NADA ie zilcho drugs and I am not sure I am made of the same ilk. My cousin would be another option but a) my mum would be hurt and b) my cousin has 2 little girls to look after...

Glad to hear it's all going well with mini peach :)

Ooh that sounds exciting skip where are you off?

kwick it always amazes me the variety of birth parents on OBEM. Who are your options?

starky first of all you are the best for saying you will start next thread !!!!
When you say af will come what do you mean? I get cramping most afternoons... Apparently this is normal. Also I read somewhere the highest risk times for MC is at the time you would have been due AF... I have been too scared to calculate that out and have adopted usual ostrich approach!

peaches good to hear you are well :). Apart from symptoms - but don't they make you feel you can believe?

I have my early scan on Monday pm... I am getting very nervous, I even dreamed about it last night...

I cried my way through an episode of One Born Every Minute yesterday.... The question is who should I have with me?

Good to see you again peaches I'll put my order in for a pair of X-ray specs!
I'm good thanks jem just booked a big once-in-a-lifetime trip so happy we decided to lay off ttc. Feeling much better now I've given myself some breathing room tbh!
Sorry to those of you caught by AF again, she's a miserable sod but a monthly reminder of how incredible the human body is I may have had a lot of sugary drinks today...

Sorry the bitch has caught up with some of you girls again. Enjoy your treats I'm sure it won't be long gone til they are on the banned list for 9 months.

ever if I find a reliable source your the first to know 😂 that and a pair of specs that gives us superman style xray vision so we can actually see what on earth is going on inside these wonderfully complicated bodies of ours!!

sucha im doing okay thanks for asking. Had my first midwife appointment earlier this week. She seemed happy so I'm happy. Been tired and queezy at times and my boobs feel like they are made up of raw nerves but it's all in a good cause so just plodding along... iv not really said much to anyone IRL so it's still a little weird if I'm honest. I reckon I'm about 8 1/2 weeks so hopefully my first scan date will be arriving soon.

Honestly have my fingers crossed for you all, here's to more bfp's in the next batch of cycles ❤

kwick how's that bean of yours coming along?

Thanks for all your thoughts girls, all really helpful. There aren't many people irl I can talk to about this from the ttc angle so this is a godsend.

My gut at the moment is telling me to stay. I get a 6 week paid sabbatical next year - quite rare - and to some extent have hung on here because I know it's on the horizon. They also have quite a generous maternity package. If I leave and get preggo then the basic smp might negate the pay rise. I need to do some sums on this to work it out though.

skip how are you getting on?
peaches good idea but any extra money is all going towards house deposit atm - a tick in the Leave box...how is your bean please?
Sorry about AF julia and twinky - roll on next month for you both xx
Hello moose and hep!

I believe it's 1000 posts before we need a new one xx

kat how are you doing? Hope you are okay xx

Fx "nothing makes AF appear faster than a FRER" so true!!!!
Peaches where can one get one of those crystal balls??!!
I have wine and chocolate
I don't even wait for AF anymore

moose I had a couple of months of being away for FW and it's beyond frustrating!! I feel your pain!

hep lovely news about your friend!

I will be wallowing in wine tonight as the witch is in the house. Going to get a CB opk predictor this cycle just so I know that I actually do ovulate!!

pug (hugs)

I actually discovered a rl friend who is pregnant, and for the first time in a while I am over the moon!!

The have been trying for many years, and had joy with ivf number 4! she is 40y this year. So happy for her!

ladies, it may not necessarily be easy but there is plenty of chance for all of us.
I think we all deserve some and / (delete as appropriate)

Just checking in girls! I haven't disappeared, just away for two weeks on a work training course. It's a bit full on, busy days then socialising with colleagues on a night. Off to my parents for the weekend too so it's a bit manic!

Congrats on the BFP ski

jem Tough decision about your job. Have you made any decisions? I'd maybe get in touch and ask for their Benifits policies as was suggested here - then you'd know for certain about maternity and that woukd help with the decision???

Frustrating month here as I'm away pretty much all fertile week, so just trying to forget about it and have a month off thinking about it or talking about it and be ready to crack on next month!

Just a thought, how many posts does it have to be before we need a new thread? I'm not sure about the technicalities of keeping the thread running - starky was just too good at it!!!

Wowzers ski !!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

note to self kwick to buy one if those digital HPTs asap

Sorry guys I am way behind! (Again)

suchajem yes it was me recommending the following in 2ww:
First five days eat a fifth of a fresh pineapple each day - including core
On lead up to ovulation and during 2ww eat lots of cayenne pepper (increases blood flow to womble)
Keep feet and kidneys warm at all times
Laugh a lot

Very sorry for your loss Pug and with ttc it's normal to be all over the place.

The AF witch has got me, only a 27 day cycle this month, I'm not getting the two full weeks post ovulation for the past while, that worries me..

Morning ladies ☺

pug sorry to hear what's been happening but I totally get were your coming from. I'd feel pretty peeved too. Agree with ever. She really should be looking to discuss this with you before using your dad's name. And if it's too tough or you wanted to use your dad's name yourself then tell her using his name as a middle feels easier for you. It's really such a raw time emotionally take care of yourself x

jem I second skip advise listen to your gut. Is it quite a good rise? Could you use your extra pay each month and give yourself a little savings cushion so that if you didn't qualify for as much mat pay you would still be able to take the same time off and not have to stress over money?

Some times in life it would be bloody handy to get a shot of a crystal ball! Would make life soo much easier 😂. Anyway, hope everyone is well and has a nice weekend planned x

I know FX I will hold off buying a FRER until tomorrow because I know if its in the house there is no way I will be able to avoid using it.

Pretty sure the witch will rear her ugly head any second now. If she's coming can she come by lunchtime so I can buy some wine for dinner

Morning gals, pug that's a rough situation, made worse by the raw emotions right now. Don't forget she's got 8 months or so to decide, and in that time literally anything could happen. In the meantime, try to focus on your own health and wellbeing and letting yourself feel whatever you need to feel right now. I personally would advise against speaking to her at this point in time, as your own feelings may change with time and healing.

Jem you're in a tight spot too!! We could all argue the pros and cons of leaving/staying till the cows come home, but at the end of the day you have to go with your gut feeling. If you stayed, and didn't get pregnant for another 5 years (IF!!) would you be happy there? If you left and got pregnant immediately could you manage without the extra benefits?

twinky STEP AWAY FROM THE BIN! Seriously, don't torture yourself. FRER if you must, but to have a chance at a starky star I would say wait. Although nothing seems to make AF appear faster than a FRER!

jem don't think of it as your current boss not wanting to keep you it might be that they genuinely have budget restrictions and can't give out raises. It's so difficult but only you know what's right for you. Would you financially be able to afford it if you went to new job and got pregnant asap and only got basic mat pay?

On another note just fished out yesterday's test and there is a line. Why do we do it to ourselves?! The logical part of me says evap but the desperate for a baby part says go and get a FRER!!! The little bit of brown spotting I had yesterday has gone but technically AF could show at any point today so making myself wait till tomorrow