Page 17 | April 2014 thread! - still continually supporting one another!

Cupcake92 · 2016-02-16T11:03:30+00:00

New thread :) I want to see lots of our old faces back!! Come on girls!

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 29/10/2016 21:15

Hopefully tho it will go smoothly and quick!

Aw no :( I hope ur solicitor sorts it for u! I'll keep my fingers crossed for u.
Surely tho they should see ur in need and about to give birth!
Council are so stupid most of the time!

My anxiety is so so bad :( I'm having horrible days I hate it. I need a break and I don't get one. I've got no friends to go out with either. :(

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duckyisback · 27/10/2016 18:15

I was thinking it was going to be 2 years but am going to try for unreasonable behaviour which is a bit worrying because of how smoothly things are going at the moment.

The homeless app didn't go too well, they're saying they have no emergency/temp accommodation unless I want to travel quite a way away. But hopefully my solicitor will sort it out for me. Have e mailed her to ask her to contact them.

Really hope it works as I just want to get sorted now

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 27/10/2016 17:48

GLad the solicitors apt went well. I'll be starting my divorce process once baby is here. Iceberg had to wait 2 years!

How did the homeless application go?
They say that about moving u into temporary accommodation but a lot of the time it's just a normal house but rent is more I think? Someone I knew had a temp house whilst waiting for her permanent home. She wasn't there 2 weeks.

I also hope stbxh keeps that up also!
Be nice if this can all go smoothly for u

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duckyisback · 27/10/2016 12:05

Going to make my homeless application in a bit.

Have been reading up on it and it says if your classes as high need, you should be put in temporary accommodation whilst they look at your application which usually takes around 18 days.

It all has to happen at the worst time!

Wish me luck!

duckyisback · 27/10/2016 03:12

Bet he loves the tipi!!

Have you come off your ad's while pregnant or can you still take them? I know what you mean about having a friend, I have no one too

The appt went well. I have started the divorce process... very scary anyway, ideally I wanted to wait until after dd has been born but I felt pressured to do it now by everyone.

Good news is I took ds to see stbxh yesterday and he has calmed down a lot, he seemed to say he would agree to the divorce (even though it's on the grounds of his unreasonable behaviour) and seemed to agree that the house will be sold, although he is struggling to find rented accommodation. Fingers crossed he keeps this up.

I am going to the council tomorrow to make a homeless application. They told me before that I can't as I am on a mortgage but the solicitor is writing me a letter to say I need to be on there as I have no where to go and can't return home. I really hope it works. She said she had done it before and it has, and I should be top priority.

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 26/10/2016 20:54

I'm really struggling with my pnd at the moment. Or would it now be pre natal instead of post natal? Or both?
Today has been hard. Had an inspection on the house at 11am. Trying to clean the bathrooms and hoover the whole house whilst I have 2 screaming kids cuz they are tired and bored cuz I'm cleaning, was just awful just broke down in tears and almost gave up with cleaning.
I managed to get everything done in the end and the letting agent said the house seems great.

3 kids is gonna be so hard. Wish I had a really really close best friend who would come over all the time and have girly nights or just help with the kids lol

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Original poster

Cupcake92 · 26/10/2016 19:08

Ahh I did write a post but it hasnt posted!

We spent the day with my mom and then exH came round to do the cake and play with ds2 for a while.
Ds2 loved it! I got him a tipi :)

Oh ur H is an idiot
Ur doing right to ignore what he says!
How did the solicitor apt go?

My 20 week scan was fine :) all okay and he looks fine!!! :) such a relief :)

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duckyisback · 25/10/2016 07:11

Happy birthday ds2!!!! have you got anything planned for it?

Good luck for your scan, don't worry about movements, I know I didn't have any at my 20 week scan either.

Things have been very difficult here. Still can't find anywhere to live. Looks like I won't before dd2.

H is getting angry cus I told him the house will have to be sold. He's going from basically calling me a money grabber to then saying I'm making him homeless and taking his kids and then acting like I'm stupid and don't know anything. Just trying to stay strong and ignore it. I have been taking ds to him when he demands but this has got him mad.

Got my solicitor appointment today and I'm a bit nervous.

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 24/10/2016 22:29

Ds2's bday tomorrow! :( can't believe he's already 1! It's gone too fast!
And I have my 20 week scan in the morning at like 9am so feeling nervous about that as I don't feel a great deal of movement :/

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Original poster

Cupcake92 · 23/10/2016 11:35

Grr that's so irritating
He should be giving ds money n thinking of him j himself

Oo good luck with the solicitors apt. Let us know how that goes.

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duckyisback · 21/10/2016 22:46

Yes he is cupcake! Unfortunately all my money has been stopped whilst my claim is looked into. He does not care, he has not asked how I'm supporting ds and myself. He has not offered us a penny. He's still sat in the house.

I took ds round earlier, he had been buying himself clothes and has a fridge full of beer and has done a big shop. Didn't ask if ds needed a thing.

I have a solicitor appointment booked for Tuesday.

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 20/10/2016 21:32

He's such a selfish beep beep!
You'll be a lot happier without him ducky. Once dd's here, you've sorted a house and in a routine you'll wonder why the hell u didn't do it sooner !

My best friend I was so close with who I'd literally speak or see everyday completely cut contact with me when I got with exH. So I know how I feel on that part :/

Haha I can guarantee ds1 will want to go in the tipi I'm just shocked a whole year has gone!

Wow ducky!! 2 weeks!!!!

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duckyisback · 20/10/2016 16:32

I suggested he goes to a friends. He blanked the idea. I also suspect there is an ow as he had turned into a completely different person. I now suspect it was his intention all along to piss me off enough until I left

Unfortunately I lost all my friends (bar one or two that I'm not that close too) when I got with him I tried adding one of my closest friends the other day and they blocked me

Dm will more than likely be looking after ds.

Omg cupcake! Can't beleive he is one already! I have seen them tipis they look ace! Bet ds1 will want to be in there all the time too!

Only 2 weeks until I'm full term .

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 19/10/2016 20:53

I would just talk to him and see what he says cuz u and ds and dd need a place especially with birth coming up u need to be less stressed.

Could u have someone else at the birth there with u as well? Ur dm? A good friend? Or something. Might make the tension less and make u feel more comfortable.

I'm exhausted. Almost 20 weeks pregnant now and doing house work is so tiring! I just wanna sleep all day and I can't lol!
It's ds2's 1st birthday on Tuesday!!!!!!! So excited for him! :) can't believe he's gonna be 1!!
I've brought him a tipi, which has sensory lights in it, so gonna put pillows inside and books so he has a cosy place to go :)
I've also ordered him a Costco cake! a chocolate one so he's gonna get messy!

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duckyisback · 18/10/2016 22:58

Thanks cupcake

What's even worse is she knows dd's name.... she wouldn't say it apparently. But TBH that's made me feel better, at least now I know I don't need to stress over her wanting them the night. I was really worried about that as ds doesn't like her.

Am thinking of telling him I can't get anywhere so asking if he can stay at a friends while i try and sort myself/have dd. But seems a shame to rock the boat while we're actually getting on. But TBH i was shocked that when I told him I can't get anywhere and that all my money has currently stopped and he just sat there. He didn't seem bothered that his pregnant wife and child would be homeless.

I know I shouldn't let him get away with everything like that but I just can't deal with any more stress at the moment.

He also has asked to be at dd's birth... which I don't have a problem wth but he was very very rude about the way he demanded asked.

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 18/10/2016 20:39

THats awful oh H's mother!! How dare she not even want to see her grandchildren! Disgusting women.

There will be houses that accept housing benefit ducky, have u asked the letting agents if they know of any?
I wish I could say come and stay with me! But even here there wouldn't be any room :/

Have u not thought of maybe getting a court order to get H moved out? As u can do that.
Or have u asked him to move out and say u need it for u and the kids especially when u are due to give birth in 3 weeks.
I think that would be the best option at this point. Get H moved out until u can sort maybe selling the house and then u both can buy a place of ur own each.

I wish I could help u ducky :( :( :(

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duckyisback · 18/10/2016 19:29

I was so relieved when it happened.

Then I was shocked, we actually started getting on, and talking like normal people!

But now I'm screwed. He is in the house, I can't go on the council list because I'm named on a mortgage, and I can't find any private rent that accept housing benefit.

I'm feeling less than welcome at dms. I've spent most the day just crying cus I'm so so stressed and just want a place for me, ds and dd but I just can't find it.

I took ds to see h today, we got on great, then I went back to dm's to find out that she had called h's mom just to discuss things. H's mom was completely unaware that we had split. Strange. But h's mom said that she doesn't want to see ds.... 'or the little girl'.

So, once again I'm moving out tomorrow, to my grandads. He's very very difficult to be around but I have no where else to go. I need organise to get the house valued so I can see if there is any equity. I'm hoping there's not so I can sign it over to him without any grief off the benefit people.

So stressed. It's like one good thing happens and is completely destroyed by something else. Not feeling great at the moment, and dd will be brought into all this mess in 3 weeks

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 18/10/2016 19:16

Ah only just realised u posted this 2 days ago!! I normally get an email to say someone's posted and I didn't :(
I hope things have been okay since?

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Original poster

Cupcake92 · 18/10/2016 19:15

Oh wow ducky!
First off, you've done the right thing! Things will get better from here honestly and id just completely ignore the social media posts etc. I'm glad ur at ur dm's.

How are u feeling?

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duckyisback · 16/10/2016 21:14

Well, I have moved out. He started being wierd with me, I told him I'd had enough, I wasn't happy. He told me I'm mentally ill repeatedly.

I have come to dms. Got to go back tomorrow and hope he's at work so I can get clothes and things as I just grabbed what I could and left.

The social media posts have already started about me.....

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 16/10/2016 20:52

Yes it was a tumour :/
Hoping the results are good tho!

Ducky if I were I I'd go with whatever I u can get. She'll Be in ur room for at least 6 months u can look for an 2 bed place in that time. But u rele need a place before she comes because u really don't want the added stress of living with Ur H and then trying to move with a Newborn and a toddler. U need a stress free place when shes born for ur sanity and for Ds and dd to be settled.

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duckyisback · 16/10/2016 07:23

Oh so it was a Tumor!? Fingers crossed it was non cancerous.

I'm feeling very de flated this week. The most perfect house came on the market yesterday. It was so perfect. The location I really wanted (they rarely come up), right size, right rent. Rang up, it was looking good, then they asked my income they said there's no chance at all as I'll be on benefits. I could have just cried. It would have been so perfect.

I found another house, but it's one bedroom and miles away from anyone I know looking like it might be my only option now though.

I only have just over 3 weeks until I'm induced. All dds stuff is in different houses and I'm starting to panic.

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 15/10/2016 21:26

She's more herself today! :) she has been crying a bit tho as she's in a bit of pain from the operation.
She's on some painkillers to help her tho. I have An appointment on Tuesday to go back to get the results and checks she's eating and drinking okay.
They said they managed to remove all of the tumour and said it was smaller than what they first thought.
But I'll find out on Tuesday if it was a cancerous tumour or not.
They had to remove 4 teeth to access the tumour as it was in her gum! The vet said they were adult teeth so unfortunately she's going to be a gummy dog now!

That's awful ducky :( it's not nice as they can't tell u if they aren't feeling right so it can go unknown

Yes I'm sure the council will at the very least give u advice and how to get a place,

Yes Lulu how are u doing? Not heard from u in a while!

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duckyisback · 14/10/2016 14:02

How is she today cupcake? Did you get the results back? It's heart braking seeing a pet ill only asked about the parents as they have a lot of problems if they came from a puppy farm type place, the vets think mine was one from a puppy farm he had no signs of being ill and just died one night. I got up to feed ds at 3am and found him.

I haven't had a chance to ring the council, but will do it next week. I'm just going to be honest with them and tell them the situation, surely they can help me even though I have a home.

How are you lulu? Everything going ok?

Original poster

Cupcake92 · 13/10/2016 22:12

I do think u should speak to them ducky, even if they offer u a 2 bed u may be in a better position when dd is due to go into her own room and u could rent privately then?
Keep looking privately tho there'll be somewhere that accepts u.
The council may even help u find a privately rented place and help u get accepted.
Any things worth a try.
I'm gonna try my luck again after xmas. I'd like to move before this baby is born.

:( she'd not been 100% for about a month now but I kept thinking it was because she was due to come on season. Tho she's not come on yet. But I didn't think anything else of it.
Oh gosh ducky :( that's awful! It's hard to even know when something's not right in a dog until the symptoms are bad.

Yes I saw her parents Her dad was a black and white collie and her mom was a brown and white one. She's only got a small bit of brown colour on her legs but she's mainly black and white :)
BoTh her parents were working sheep dogs tho.

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