Relaxed TTC Feb/March/April 2016

Evening all. Just checking in. No progress here but period has finished so can get back onto ttc! Not tonight though, much too tired. Zzzzz.

Alice my DH struggled with the idea of dtd on demand too when we were TTC our DD. It really does take all the fun out of it! No words of advice I'm afraid but you are most definitely not alone, from talking to other people I think a lot of men struggle with the pressure.

He was the one that made the final decision to go for it. Just messaged me saying hes made a gp appt and hes really broody...ao hopefully this is all teething trouble and things will work out in the end.

Feel hopeful today, even if this takes a few extra months, that doesn't matter.

Dynia good plan, don't make my mistake and be too into TTC around him. Do you think lupus will interfere with you temping?

Alice, did the two of you decide together that you wanted a baby? Could he perhaps be hesitant about it and maybe not quite ready? It's probably just that the clinical nature of symptom spotting kills his sex drive, but it could be something more. Glad you talked, though, I hope his suggestion of you warning him about the FW and him initiating works.

We will start trying next month. Still no sign of bleeding after coming off of Cerazette (20 days) but have had normal CM cycles and sore breasts about 14 days in so we shall see next week if my periods go back to normal. I haven't started temping yet as I don't have a real last day of period date, I'm a bit curious about it as I have lupus and a tendency towards fevers anyways. Currently working from the couch today as I've got an awful cold.

We've talked about whether my husband wants to know and agreed that it put a lot of pressure on him. I'll just be dragging us to bed when we get home from work and waking him up early.

Thanks everyone, we had another talk about it last night, he's going to see the gp about his sex drive and we agreed I would just mention one that I was approaching the FW next month and leave it up to him...which I can see the logic of, I just hope he does initiate dtd or that is going to be a difficult FW for me.

Stock up guys! I brought opks from superdrug yesterday on impulse, much cheaper to buy them online.

It's official, I've uninstalled Ovia, much prefer fertility friend.

Alice* sorry to hear you're having a bad time. I know with my dh he was adamant he didn't want to know about ovulation or fw or anything like that. I just told him when my period stopped and let him initiate from there. As it happened the month I conceived we didn't dtd on the day I ovulated but the day after so it obviously doesn't necessarily have to be on that day. It's so hard to stay relaxed though isn't it. Haven't even started trying yet and already stocked up on opks!!!

Alice, sorry it's getting you down. Have you tried getting your OH into helping you spot FW signs? He might feel more a part of it than a necessary addition? I say this as all week I was showing DH opks as they developed and by the time it was positive he was as excited as me (shall I put a baby in you now, then?").

Thanks for the support everyone, feel like I'm going to be a look by the time we actually TTC!

It's incredible tricky - my husband isn't delighted at the planned nature of activity. I won't mention it next month.

Thanks guys, he does know how little chance there is, but I don't think he can accept it. Apparently having sex once during the fertile period will guarantee pregnancy within a year....great. He's in denial and apparently its me pilling the pressure on by using preseed and saying we are in the fw and initiating... I cant win.
He is just massively overthinking the whole thing. I'm just going to stop talking about it completely.

I think I'm out because we had proper sex once on cd10, I guess I could be lucky, but i very much doubt it.

Thanks for the support everyone, been really sad and tearful tonight, TTC is way more stressful than I thought.

My DP had no idea that window was so small. But he seems to want to know when it is - said by planning it into his week he won't be tired or busy and I won't be frustrated about missed opportunities. Although this is only first cycle. Men are weird though!

Alice, I'm sorry you're feeling rejected. My H said similar after a couple cycles of TTC last time. Definitely agree you should just avoid talking about cycle days and anything clinical and just pretend to be a little spontaneous.

Bad luck Alice. I think sometimes DHs find it difficult to see the bigger picture. Maybe don't tell him about cycle days and fertile times and just aim for lots of sex from about cycle day 11!

CD12,13,14th dtd twice, but no swimmers :( Apparently sex is now clinical and boring, all 3 sessions of it I'm out for this month, told DH we can wait til March if he thinks that best.

Trying very hard not to feel very rejected.

Ridiculous, I'm approaching ov, but not trying this cycle! I'm just waving pom-poms for everyone else and here to distract from any insane symptom spotting in your TWWs

Oh button, it's not a waste! It'll prevent a whole lot of paranoid worry when you DO start TTC. You'll know when you ovulate and you'll be able to recognise the signs, and if it doesn't happen right away you can just be happy knowing you did what you could and that so many eggs just don't get fertilised, and even if they do they don't always implant, so even if you do EVERYTHING right it might not happen. But then you won't end up scrambling around to get the hang of your cycle when you're already TTC. You're smart!

Ugh. So I weighed myself today. I'm officially the biggest I've ever been. I'm 12kg heavier than I was at my wedding in 2013 and 8kg heavier than I was when I fell pregnant with my first. So now my goal is to lose 8kg in 3 months. F*ck me, hopefully My Fitness Pal, Endomondo, using the spin bike at home and walking the dog will do the trick. That and not eating Nutella by the spoonful......... Must get a bit into shape for TTC!!

ButtonTum - I know what you mean about it being a waste for now, but I for one am so pleased I looked into things months before we actually were TTC because it has given me a chance to realize there was a prob then get it sorted! My cycles are now so much better (although still irregular) and I am starting to get to know my body now. I honestly do feel more relaxed about just going with it next month and seeing what happens. 2 or 3 months ago I would never have said that!

You too this is!

Good luck mango hope you catch the egg this cycle! Would be lovely to get some BFPs at the end of Feb

I think I oved on Tuesday/Wednesday.
We managed Tuesday and going for EOD until middle of next week to be sure!

button I have a really obsessive personality so doing my best to avoid opks & temping for now as it would only turn me into a mad woman!

Welcome marshpillow

stumbly you're probably right but I think I might POAS on Sunday anyway just in case although my fertile period is from tomorrow I reckon so DTD last night & planning to tomorrow & EOD for the next week. I was telling DH the plan last night & said it should get me 'good and pregnant'! we can only hope!

Anyone else approaching ovulation?

Hello again all. I'm still in the 'relaxed ttc from April' camp but have been doing opks, cm and temping like a beast to feed ovia with all its info everyday, so I know that at the right time I can be in there boom, just at the right time.
Had stomach cramps this morning suggesting ov day, as ovia suggests so did opk and got my first positive - so that's exciting. However can't help but feel like it's all a bit of a waste as no action until April now! At least we're headed in the right direction.
Anyone else just sitting pretty surrounded by al the kit?