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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

"Casually" TTC

343 replies

BigChiefThunderThighs · 25/05/2015 00:05

TTC number 2, we've agreed to go ahead in a "let's just see whAt happens, no pressure" kind of way. so I'm casually charting my cycles with a fertility app, breezily checking my cervical mucous, nonchalantly scouring the conception board and definitely not compiling a list of names for dc2 Blush.
What is so frustrating is that because I'm "casually" charting all of this I know exactly when my fertile window is and keep bloody missing it because I don't want to give the game away and look like baby crazed monster! Last month my carefully timed advances were thwarted by a five-aside groin strain. I think today was the day and was planning a seduction after dd's bedtime but he announced he was off to his brothers for a bank holiday drink.
This is lighthearted and is not a problem with communication in my marriage. I think he felt the pressure last time and I'm really trying to keep this as relaxed as possible (for him) but that's just not my style.

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ktkaye · 27/05/2015 13:49

Cervix position is a new source of (casual) fascination for me now! Have never considered it... But now will spend best part of this evening researching and angling myself awkwardly to try and work things out - behind closed doors. Cannot reveal extent of nuttiness to oh. No symptoms whatsoever today - think my uterus is on holiday and producing neither spotting nor cramps nor any form of CM. if I wasn't quite so relaxed my brain would be screaming 'why why WHAT IS HAPPENING?!!!' But clearly I am too at ease for that . If I'm really honest I always just assumed the first time I had unprotected sex that would be that - I mean obviously the logical part of my brain knows that can't be the case but all this refusal to go back to something as obvious as a period has thrown me a bit! What's the news from everyone else today? X

Alice1983 · 27/05/2015 13:01

I might just have a casual browse on Amazon Grin. I only know the last day which was 17th May BigChief. We hadn't been trying to be honest, but I got PG last year, literally! and was naive to think it would always be that easy. The only one time ever I could have got PG, I did! (ended in MC). After 3 & 1/2 months of him thinking all was fine, he had got his head around the idea, (whilst going on about his super manly abilities Wink) Now he is worried that there is something wrong so he's happy to prove differently (not going to complain about that Smile) We have been trying for about two months. I don't regularly check, but if nothing happens, soon I will be starting to report back on my OV, obviously only casually Grin

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 27/05/2015 09:46

I havent used ovulation tests yet this time, tbh I didn't find them very useful last time as I was never sure if I was getting a positive! I probably would do in your situation if my cycles weren't regular. I won't even say relax and wait for your cycles to regulate because I know that in your situation I wouldbe obsessing about whether my period hadn't come because of the implant or because I was pregnant!
This month is the first time I've used a fertility app and really tried checking cm and cervix position (after some instructional articles with diagramsBlushmust also delete browsing history)

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ktkaye · 27/05/2015 08:44

How exciting Big Chief! Hopefully the wait isn't too long for you. I am highly amused by your dh's approach, mine has the same 'let's see' attitude and I'm fairly sure he's convinced it won't actually happen yet!!

BCTT and Alice Do you regularly check your ov? I am trying to avoid (do one every day) the opk stick things because they never show a positive for me... Which is very disheartening even though until a fortnight ago we weren't trying and it shouldn't matter anyway (which sort of led me to conclude that I was in fact, in denial about being desperate for a baby. Even though I am normally very sensible and not a loon and absolutely didn't burst in to tears the last time my oh reached for a condom mid snog.)
I'm hoping my cycles start back up soon so I know where I am. TRYiNG not to be a baby-crazed mentalist but it seems a little switch has gone in me and that's that. X

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 27/05/2015 07:57

Alice when was the first day of that period? If u know how many days your cycles are count from the first day to know when af is due. I would second a casual Amazon order - I may have placed an order last night about midnight as my supplies are depleted! Cheap testing strips are really sensitive: 15 strips for £2.80. Then I would order clear blue digital to confirm if one of the strips looked promising! You can get 2 of those for£7.20 on Amazon. I was just casually browsing you understand!
Kt I came off the pill in feb but only cos I was feeling rubbish on it, so I was avoiding fertile times that month as we hadn't had the conversation. In the end the conversation was "should I go to the docs to try a different pill?" Dh "nah you could just leave it and we'll see what happens".
Periods came back straight away and theyve been fairly regular - shorter cycles that before dd though. Dd has just turned 2 - she was conceived in 3rd cycle so fingers crossed!

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ktkaye · 27/05/2015 07:26

You know... If I wasn't so casual I would highly recommend late night Amazon purchases of clear blue ... Adds a little 3am frisson. If I did that sort of thing. Which I don't.
How long have you both been trying for? This is my first experience of not trying not not trying (meaning trying!) and time is crawling past x

Alice1983 · 27/05/2015 00:47

I will probably brave it and test on the 10th (BTW, I have no idea if this is the right date or not) AF finished on 17th May..what do you think? (I casually memorised this date) and clearly won't be standing outside the pharmacy at 9.00am like a loon waiting for it to open, I would at least leave it casually until 09.01 to make it less awkward Grin

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 27/05/2015 00:26

Yes 9th June is when af is due, so trying not to test until then! Even then i'll be ever so casual. Definitely won't be sneaking into the en suite at 5am trying to unwrap the test super quietly - nope not me Grin

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Alice1983 · 27/05/2015 00:07

This is my AF Due Date, 10th June. Is the 9th June not your AF Due Date? How long before can I 'casually' test? Grin

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 23:43

oooh that is a bonus kt - random testing all month! I would drive myself to distraction! Not sure if my luck is in this month I'm obv too casual to give it much thought Wink
Alice - you can keep me strong and try to dissuade me from testing until af due date then!

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Alice1983 · 26/05/2015 23:17

Mine would be the 10/06/2015 Smile. Last time I didn't test at all (really!) so this is all a bit new to me Grin. It feels like time is going too slow! I will just have to carry on TTC taking no notice of OV dates Smile

ktkaye · 26/05/2015 23:05

Haha! Well I haven't had my period back since my nexplanon removal (6weeks ago) so I have the added bonus of calculating 2 weeks from each day we dtd over the last fortnight because I have NO idea what my body is doing bar casual CM checking. So today was the first (bfn) and pretty much every day this week also has potential (libido back post- BC Blush). Realistically I expect AF to appear before a bfp which is fine. Would be cheaper test-wise! Do you think your luck is in this month?

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 22:45

nice to have a group of like-minded, laid back ladies WinkIf anyone would like to post their expected bfp date we can look out for updates and see if our casual approach is working! Mine is 9th June, if I last that long before wasting several tests!

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ktkaye · 26/05/2015 22:37

Smile yay! I've been lurking on the forums since having my Nexplanon removed and OH and I had 'the chat' officially today that we are officially being ever so casual about TTC (obv the last two weeks of extra casual BDing doesn't count right Shock). Anyhoo, excited to emerge from the lurking and join other casual people

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 22:31

Sure kt - all casual ttcers welcome!

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ktkaye · 26/05/2015 22:23

Please can I join? I am as casual as a casual thing on a causal day TTC ( hides second pregnancy test of the week). We (me and my husband) are NTNP and I am trying not to obsess, he really is relaxed. Help please?! X

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 20:38

Good work Kitkat - nothing says "casual" like opk's and temping Grin

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Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 20:34

You lot understand - I can imagine dh's face if i started a conversation about our imaginary, not yet conceived child maybe having a Valentine's birthday Hmm

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Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 20:32

It's so hard not to get carried away. I've already calculated a due date based on getting pregnant this month - Valentine's Day! Blush

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kitkat1989 · 26/05/2015 20:15

I 'casually' went and got another load of ovulation kits and a thermometer today... oh obv doesnt know this. My app says im ovulating this week but opk hasnt said yes yet... we dtd yesterday though so fx! Its only our firsy proper month so im trying not to get too excitable about it but i know im so impatient that that wont happen!

Alice1983 · 26/05/2015 18:55

I think either my OH knows is quite happy about the situation and keeping quiet while it lasts Wink or failing that, you are right and they are not the brightest Grin

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 18:22

Ooo when are you going to POAS? You've been very restrained - 2 days late! Let us know when you do!

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themumfairy · 26/05/2015 18:15

in future I'll just have to rant on here! hehe either we are way to clever or they are not the brightest! fingers crossed this is the month for everyone. I'm now 2 days late however my cycles have never really gone back to 'normal' since coming off the pill. so I might not be late at all as my cycle can vary x

Original poster
BigChiefThunderThighs · 26/05/2015 18:04

Mumfairy - yes totally! I was in a foul mood first day of my period this month! Didn't hide the rage very well.
The ovulation tests haven't made an appearance yet this time round but I predict that if nothing happens this month I'll be hiding them in amongst the tampax soon!
On a positive note, my fertility app had my peak day as being a couple of days ago but some symptoms today suggest it was wrong - so I managed home at lunchtime for a quickie as dh on day off! Now that I think about it he must have clocked what I'm up to by now, as that is fairly suspicious behaviour for me! Grin

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Snowberry86 · 26/05/2015 12:46

We started fairly casually 14 months ago, after 2 months I got obsessive why is this not happening panic and downloaded every app going, ovulation sticks the works. Still hasn't happened and so we are now going back to casual to take the stress off while we wait for the fertility clinic referal to come through!

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