Don't mess with the Bumsnetters they have Angry Pubes!

Hopefully it will be higher tomorrow, Spinning. 13 million still sounds pretty good though. It only takes one!

Rainy, you are over the worst, which is relentless ttc month after month after month. You haven't been trying long in the grand scheme of things but I know eleven months feels like forever. I'll be interested to know what your day 3 & 21 tests results are.

Nomio, I also think you have OHSS. Where are you in your cycle now? It will be interesting to see how the progesterone helps, eh?

Spinning, you're sweet for asking about the job. I surreptitiously cleared my drawers tonight in case I never go back I tried to needle my line manager today just so I could get myself in the 'fuck you, you're an idiot' frame of mind for leaving. It wasn't hard. She started wittering on about all the long haul holidays she has her months-old babies on in the past and how impeccably they behaved on aeroplanes because, you know, a relentlessly screaming baby on a flight is just down to 'bad parenting'.

I told her I considered taking tiny tots on long-haul flights and hot beaches to be bad parenting and no amount of cajoling would placate a wailing tot who objected to being cocooned on an aeroplane for fourteen fucking hours with its ears popping. Fucking stupid, some people.

Nomio, I couldn't believe that dp managed it last time. He has performance issues sometimes, I couldn't think that sitting in a public toilet would help!

Haha Rainy Yes he has a low sperm count. I can't remember the numbers and I can't find where I wrote them down! I think it was around 13 million which sounds loads but it should be over 15 million I believe. He's been on loads of vitamins so we're hoping to see a difference.

Lovely mental image there, Rainy!

I suggested to DH that he should ust take a dirty magazine to the clinic & pop into the toilets, but he doesn't think he would be able to perform under those circumstances! Since when did men get so sensitive?!

Spinning, I hope DH gets on ok. Why is he being re-tested? Did he have a low result last time?

Nomio that is annoying but least you are on some kind of treatment at the moment, fingers crossed it will work and won't need IVF, good luck!!

Spinning thats a really good idea , i will let oh know of this, probably park the car at the building and see a bunch of men having a wank in the car in the corner and then run to the department lol!!

Rainy - he will need to hand in the sample within a couple of hours max of doing it, so will need some time off to provide it. Unless you can find a clinic with early morning appointments so he could do it before work and you could take it?
Check his contract though, mine states that time off should be given for fertility tests as per the company medical policy. Xx

Dp has to do another sperm sample tomorrow, it has to be there at 11am and it can take 50mins from us to get to the hospital so last time he did it in the toilet in the hospital not ideal but at least the sperm was there within 5 minutes!

No, we were referred before & had an appointment to get going with IVF, but we moved three months ago & are now having to be re-referred. They are insisting on doing all the tests again so that they are up to date.

In the meantime I am on Clomid plus have just started Progesterone to try to help with my short LP.

Nomio sorry is this your first referral to clinic ?

I don't know if that would affect things or not. I seem to remember when DH had his last SA he had to hand it in in person for some reason, but can't remember why.

He has to do another one now, but the clinic near us was closed down, so he has to hand it in in Cambridge. We live in Herts! I am not sure how to get it there in time, unless we just book a hotel & go stop over the night before. The NHS really don't make it easy for you to get fertility services.

We also both have to have Chlamydia tests, despite the fact that I had one done 2 days ago when I was at the hospital!

Thanks Spinning and Nomio some good advice, think dh is worried about getting time off to hand in his sample, i work near the hospital where it would be handed in, i was wondering if he was to book the appointment i could hand it in on the allocated time, he has also had an awful stomach bug so I'm not sure whether to wait till he has recovered a week or so before booking in his sample

You are making progress towards your baby then, Rainy.

I know it is easier said than done, but I am trying to focus on the good things about not having children right now. Silly things like we get to have a lie in at the weekends, can go out just on a whim, etc.

Nomio, so pleased you saw a lady doc today. Sorry you're still
Poorly but yay for the scan tomorrow. Fx they'll find out what's going on and get you some treatment and on the road to recovery

Purdie, how was your day?

Yokyil, fx for you.

Rainy, when I saw the lady doc at the fertility clinic she said she doesn't tell women to relax and not think about it. She said it's impossible when you want something so bad. She just said it will happen when it happens. I know that's not really helpful but please don't worry that you're stopping the bfp by thinking about it. Do try and do something fun this weekend though. Get out in the fresh air, drink wine, eat cake, whatever's your thing. Your time will come

Rainy here's hoping they can provide you with a plan of action. Be good to yourself these next few days xx

Yokyil I have had day 21 blood tests done and going tomorrow for day 2/3 blood tests to be referred for fertility clinic ,x

Nomio Il join you in that pity party , il bring the cocktails!!!

Sammy Thankyou , i know its my hormones that is making me feel like this, just feel that everyone around me have got cute bumps and i am so envious, I know i am in a better position as i am being referred to a fertility clinic,

Thanks sammy really appreciate it

rainy that time after AF comes is the worst, it feels like a baby is so far away. But don't be getting disheartened. Have you made an appointment with your gp to maybe start any investigations? Bloods etc? You'll look back on this time in your life when you have a wee baba of your own and you have to let that drive you xx

Thanks, lovelies. To be honest, I just feel like crying at the minute. DH is away tonight too, which doesn't help.

He is in your city for a meeting, Frog. I would have tagged along & taken you out for a coffee, but I have my last ever class at Uni tomorrow, so need to be here!

Nomio - bless you, I'm so glad someone is finally listening to you. Even if it's not at least they're going to check and you can rule it out.

Yokyil - I totally understand why you're not getting your hopes up. So sorry to hear about your mc.

Rainy - I know how you feel, I also feel further and further from my baby. It feels like it's never going to happen. Do remember this is partly your hormones, you will feel a little better in a couple of days.

Everyone feel free to moan if you need to, it's not good to keep things bottled up anyway. Xx

Rainy, I am throwing a pity party tonight. Come join me!

I hate it when people say 'just relax & it will happen', or just stop thinking about it'. How? Are you going to give me a lobotomy?!

Sometimes it is so, so hard to keep going, but you will get through this & one day soon it will all be worth it.

STATS*

Rainy34 TTC1 cycle 11 BFP Due 28 th May

Thanks everyone for your support , i don"t feel like I'm getting closer to my turn, feels like its getting further and further away, sorry i am being negative, i felt positive this morning , i spoke to a lady yesterday and she had been trying for five years and had the mind set it will happen when it happens, the month she fell, was when everything all fell into place in her life,She told me to relax and not think about it , i have heard this so many times before, when you relax it will happen , i know this is true but no one has the answer in how to go about this, i try and occupy myself , but it dont work, I have stopped drinking, cut out crap food and ramming down god knows how many pills a day for nothing, its total shite, sorry il go and sit in the corner with a paper bag over my head!!

Nomio that sounds awful ...Really really hope that you get that scan tomorrow, and get to the bottom of all this pain you're in you've every right to moan, it's what we're all here for.
sammy cycle 5 - but had a mc in jan, so very tentative about the whole process af was late by 6 days last month so don't want to test early and set myself up for another bfn

Yokyil, that sounds hopeful.

DizzyN, I agree that it is completely unfair. I think you should be allowed IVF if you don't have any children of your own, never mind if your DH has them with someone else. It definitely won't come to that though.

Night, you have my sympathy. UTIs are the worst. I went through a nasty phase of them before, then got thrush from the antibiotics!

So, my saga continues. I was back at the Drs this morning, as they made me an appointment when I was in on Monday. Saw a lovely female Dr who actually seemed to know something about fertility & she is pretty convinced it is OHSS, but thinks I have had a cyst burst as well.

She has requested an emergenct ultrasound & hopefully I should hear something tomorrow. I am still in pain & am just really fed up & tired.

Sorry to be such a moaner, but I am just feeling really down right now.