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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Bumsnet: we're raising our bums after TTC and waiting for our Angry Pubes.

996 replies

purdiepie · 15/04/2015 18:26

Do you like feeling left out of a group? Do you enjoy being marginalised and isolated and picked-on? How about a good bullying? If so..you're in t'wrong place, cock, coz this 'ere is the TTC thread where you feel loved, embraced, encouraged, wanted, lusted after, admired, respected, thought-of with fondness, missed when you're away. We will even put up with your lazy, selfish bastard of a husband who would rather watch Chelsea romp through the Premiership than put a baby in your tum-tum.

Absolutely any old slag welcome, unless you already have a baby in your tum-tum and we're about as familiar with you as a condom. You can get lost Smile

t'STATS, innit

OP posts:
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GlitteryLipgloss1 · 18/04/2015 12:36

Creme the fb group is a secret group. Only members see what's posted in. Doesn't show in your news feed. x

Original poster
purdiepie · 18/04/2015 12:35

Glittery, I'm sorry your size has become an issue that others feel at liberty to comment on. The doc's just doing his job, and although you are without question a sexy-looking lady (I haven't seen your body), and a brilliant wit, you will have an easier time of ttc without the lard. Stop drinking so bloody much, you pisshead. Vodka is evilly caloric and simply makes you want to gnaw the balls off a donkey come midnight.

OP posts:
DizzyMerry · 18/04/2015 12:34

Sorry for AF boris.

Glittery sorry you didn't get your scan but pleased that things are moving forward for you.

Pleased things are moving forward for you too eskimo it's all happening now!

Eskimo I would go for the romantic evening in too. That's my idea of pure bliss.

Well cd6 here and thankfully we can start shagging again! Didnt think I'd ever say it but I'm been looking forward dtd!!!

MaMaPo · 18/04/2015 12:33

Purdie, intersectionality exists! Class, wealth and access to opportunities are very important to the success of women but they don't cancel out the effect of the patriarchy.

MaMaPo · 18/04/2015 12:31

Purdie I reckon I've been to the cinema about 4 times since my daughter was born (nearly 2.5 years). But that's about average for me; I really don't like most films. So eskimo I'd stay at home with a fire. Lovely!

Butterchunks · 18/04/2015 12:31

ffs. lean meats, not ran meats. stupid phone. I'm literally within arms reach of my laptop but still am too lazy to type properly. sorry ladies.

Original poster
purdiepie · 18/04/2015 12:30

Mamapo, feminists bang on about choice but refuse to acknowledge that it is a woman's class that is the deciding factor in how much choice she has, not patriarchy. And no amount of exposure to pink toys will stop the daughter of wealthy parents from becoming whatever it is they want her to be.

Mumsnet is awash with feminists wanting g an end to prostitution, you know...what with all those poor trafficked birds being forced into it Hmm

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cremedecacao · 18/04/2015 12:30

I'm being stupid here, but how does the Facebook thing work? Is it just a group? Can anyone else see you have joined? What's the difference in real terms between talking on here and on Facebook? Just wondering!

eskimolaura · 18/04/2015 12:29

Thanks chops Glad you're sticking around. It was my DH. The way he's going today though, it will be more likely an evening spent avoiding his wood rather than watching actual wood burn. He not yet at the stage where he's humping my leg, but he's very nearly there Hmm

Thank you sparkly FX eh?! Grin

Butterchunks · 18/04/2015 12:29

Glittery I like Slimming world, lost a stone since end of Jan. you can eat as much as you like of "free foods" such as fruit, veg, pasta, rice and ran meats. you can also eat anything else you want (but count syns, usually aim for 5-15 per day. small bag of wotsits is 4.5 suns). the only things you have to measure out are carby stuff (bread, porridge, cereal) and dairy, but I get round that by using almond milk. you get loads of info when you join and soon learn the amounts of the few things you need to count. the idea is basically to eat as much as you can, of the right things, to keep your metabolism going and your mouth and belly happy.

you are totay allowed to have a splurge every now and again , because it helps be realistic (can't be good all the time, and don't have to feel like a failure if you end up having a nice meal on a night out). the web support is good too with good databases for food info and load of recipes. it hasn't really changed what I cook at home, just don't use oil anymore and maybe extra vegs.

anyways, if you like shoving unlimited amounts of food in your face I'd recommend Slimming World. Grin

Sparkly123 · 18/04/2015 12:29

That makes sense Choppers strange you don't recognise anyone.. Maybe they didn't do the buses and went straight to AN?! Either way! Stay here! You will be about five weeks today eh!

chopsface · 18/04/2015 12:23

Thanks for letting me stay lol! I don't know the ladies on the AN thread. Where have they even appeared from? I don't know their stories and history, plus they keep talking about potty training their existing tots! Wtf?! I'll just wait until we are all on the bumsnet Grad bus!

glittery sorry dildocam didn't happen. Hope dh's test turns out alright. Has he got a date?

Good luck with all your tests too Eskimo x

Sorry for af Boris

Whose dh wanted a Romantic evening watching wood burn? Do it! I would!

Sparkly123 · 18/04/2015 12:23

Eskimo military precision. I love it. I'm excited for you! This month is the month you will have so much info at your fingertips! Yes!!!

MaMa yep I don't get it. Thanks for reaffirming it's a lot of bollocks! Ha, enjoy the vino !! Grin

Original poster
purdiepie · 18/04/2015 12:18

Cinema. When you get your babby you'll never watch a movie again

OP posts:
eskimolaura · 18/04/2015 12:15

sparkly The plan is (and it is very regimented, so listen up). Tuesday should be CD1 (going by my bleed after the Norethisterone in January). I will call the clinic and book in my HSG for CD7, 8, 9 or 10. DH has his sperm assessment on Monday ( if he doesn't fall asleep on the day and if I don't give in to his amorous demands. He is particularly horny today because he knows it is forbidden Hmm ) After that, we DTD like crazy bunnies in the hope that I am ovulating like a good 'un. I will then hopefully have CD21 and CD28 tests to see if that has happened. Not sure what happens after that. I think that the clinic want to see me back in June, but that might change depending on the results of the blood tests. How are you my lovely?

P.S You are right- Glittery is a stunner! Grin

MaMaPo · 18/04/2015 12:13

Oh, shitty news glitter. It's probably a good idea for your other half to have his test done though. And if you feel motivated and believe you can shift the weight, you will. So much of it is self belief. Good luck.

Sparkly, the dating of pregnancies is a black art that nobody actually understands. You fertilise an egg on Monday and by Saturday you're about five weeks. I never understood it. Fingers crossed for you.

Boris, bfn and AF = fucker. So sorry.

Is anyone having a good morning, except juney who's been lying about? Grin

Purdey, you have the weirdest idea about what feminism is. You must have encountered some odd versions of it. All the feminists I know (ie plenty) are very supportive of sex workers. (Is that where your distaste for the movement comes from? Do you reckon I could be any more nosey? Wink)

Busy day today, finished off with souvlakis with the toddler. She scoffed the whole bloody thing, that's my girl. Now it's wine and mint slice biscuits. I have given up on giving up alcohol for ttc.

GlitteryLipgloss1 · 18/04/2015 12:03

Thank you sparkly. Thanks Xxx

GlitteryLipgloss1 · 18/04/2015 12:01

Boris sorry for AF my lovely. Sending you a massive massive cuddle xx

GlitteryLipgloss1 · 18/04/2015 12:00

No boris. No medical reason. Just years of alcoholic and Indian curry and kebabs after nights out abuse. (Being honest) I am a curvy gal but I am over weight. Or as the Dr said. But it's cool it's cool - I shall sort it out. X

Sparkly123 · 18/04/2015 11:58

Eskimo great news re scan!!! Brilliant! Ok so.. When's next app? Glad things are being ruled out!!

GlitteryLipgloss1 · 18/04/2015 11:58

I was referred to weight watchers so counting points. Think it's time to get a treadmill in the 2nd room and try and get back into my running. Which I haven't done since I met DH.

I told him twice I am doing ww.

Thank you Laura. Will have a look and print that out :) xx

Sparkly123 · 18/04/2015 11:57

Glitterpants I'm so sorry my lovely what a rubbish start to your Sat! However!! Good that you are getting bloods.. Good that dh sperm sample is sorted and good that an actual scan is in place. These are all positive steps. I know you had your mind set on today being the scan and it's hard when these things don't happen but at least they are on the horizon and maybe your BFP shall pop up before then anyway! Regarding the weight- I can't imagine how hard it is and I know you are trying so hard. Stupid doctor making you feel bad. You will get there!! You will. Maybe the others advice is helpful about NHS diet etc. I have nothing to offer you because I have the opposite problem with weight but i know how draining it must be for you to keep trying and not achieve your goal. 3 stone seems a lot in such a short space of time. Hopefully the dieticians will be helpful. You are not useless. You are a gorgeous (I just know this, I don't need to see a Facebook pic) intelligent,bubbly lady and you can not render yourself disgusting and useless due to your weight. I won't have it! Come on girl we are all behind you, Keep focused that the tests are in hand, July is three cycles away. Sending Flowers

eskimolaura · 18/04/2015 11:50

Glittery Here it is:

www.nhs.uk/Livewell/weight-loss-guide/Pages/losing-weight-getting-started.aspx

It has downloadable charts for every week. I printed them off, stuck them on the fridge and followed them religiously. Going to do it again this summer as I've now almost put back on the stone I lost, but it was a gradual loss and once the wedding was over, I didn't stick to it, so it's been a really gradual gain. It wasn't like I lost it quickly and then put it back on quickly, coz it's not a fad diet. It's just eating sensibly and doing some exercise x x

eskimolaura · 18/04/2015 11:45

Aww, Glitz I am so sorry- we had crossed posts then. Here I am banging on about my scan when you have been shafted with yours. 3 stone in 4 months is really tough, but doable. Have you seen the NHS 12 week weight loss plan? If you type it into Google, it comes up and it's FAB! I lost a stone in two months with it last year and I was only following the eating part- not the exercise bit. With both, I'm sure you can shift it. x x x

Boris So sorry for AF dude Sad

Hairstylisttoboris · 18/04/2015 11:38

Oh glittery sorry you didn't get a scan anyhow. And that you got a lecture. Did you say you've been trying to shift the weight? Is there a medical reason why it won't shift?

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