The Angry Pubes of Bumsnet

boris I'm ok thanks. Still no sign of AF (now 8 days late) Feeling quite positive, started running today and have treated myself to some summer dresses

I'm very behind but wanted to come on to give sparkly the biggest hug ever.

spinning I once found my evening standard copy in the fridge and my dinner in the recycling.

rainy thinking of you tomorrow hope it goes ok. Xxxxx

Oh sparkly just got home from a walk and read your update. I agreed other all the advice you've got here. Praying for you my lovely.
daisy we do park run too. alpha my step daughter and I often walk it, don't be intimidated, it's supportive not competative.

melon how are you? Thinking of you. Bloody love that dress.

welcome to the newbies

Sparkly, please can I see today's chart?

I'm getting you some help from a wonderful friend who has just suffered her third chemical pregnancy after IVF (she has had to go down the assisted route as both her tubes are irreparably damaged). Hang on in there while I try to get answers from her tonight re what should happen tomorrow when you ring your nurse. If anyone knows what they're talking about re chemicals it's my friend

Rainy that's so lovely of you but focus on yourself mrs! You only get a limited time in the app so use it wisely. I'm sorry you are feeling like that about it. Try and look at this as a positive step forward, this is going to get you closer to your baby. This app could be the start of answers. And those will ultimately be of help for moving onwards. Tomorrow is the start of something positive and it's going to renew your faith and give you hope. I'm sure of it

Fertility consultants that should read, Sparkly*.

Sparkly, do you remember me saying that some fertility say that a prog score below 30 will not support a pregnancy? Just because your score was decent-ish at 7dpo does not mean it doesn't rapidly plummet taking an embryo with it. I would bet my last pound that you need prog support.

Dearest darling Sparkly the other ladies have said everything already but I had to come on and send you some more love. You deserve to get answers and you deserve to get them with respect. Nobody should have to fear making a phonecall to a medical professional, especially when it is for such an emotive reason as yours. I am so cross on your behalf that this nurse has made you feel this way in the past - yes, her words/actions may be 'following the rules' but there is such a thing as 'bedside manner' and there must be nurses who get the information across in a kinder, more supportive way. Is there anyway you can get your DH in on a three-way phone call so you know he is there and if she starts being rude or upsetting you he can jump in with some support? Do you have names of any other nurses you could speak to instead? Does your consultant have a secretary you could call? I had to book an appt with my consultant via his secretary last week and whilst she doesn't have any medical knowledge she was absolutely lovely and maybe more 'human', so you could call them and explain what is going on and why you would like to speak to a different nurse to last time?

Sorry for rambling on - you have been so helpful and so supportive to all of the bus passengers that I can't bear the thought of you upset and being treated badly

Spinning i have not wrote anything down , i think thats a brilliant idea, as i know i will forget

Sparkly, honestly, who cares if you lose it with the nurse tomorrow? Look, you are human, despite how perfectly amazingly stoical you appear on here, you cannot go on having chemical pregnancies and for it not to affect you. My love, please cry tomorrow at the nurse. Don't hold back. Please ask her if you can have the beta blood test in future on the day you get your BFP.

I also suggest you start a thread here on MN asking for advice about all of this. Change your username if you feel shy or embarrassed or just nervous. You don't need to say you have been using AI. There is an absolute wealth of knowledge on here if you will just reach out. I can only suggest so much, and there are few others on this bus who will be able to give advice. Please use the wonderful advice out there

Sparkly I am dreading going tomorrow, makes it all the more real but it has to be done, I might mention to her that my friend has the same problem as me but has got pregnant twice and then miscarries and see what she says, to see if i can give you any advice x

Ooh it's time for Poldark

Rainy, good luck tomorrow. Your plan sounds good, I always forget to ask things, have you written your questions down? I hope you get some answers you're happy with.

^^^
Why did I write Nomio ?!? Sorry Rainy !!!

Oh sorry Nomio totally forgot you had app Tomor. How you feeling about it? I think your plan of action is better! If you appear clueless they will think they can fob you off and you won't get answers.
Thanks, I know.. I am trying to focus on fact I must be quite fertile given I conceived twice without months and months of trying, it's just the keeping it in there. The progesterone seems the most obvious to me. But there's no tests that prove that to them which is the hurdle I need to get over.

Sparkly I am so so sorry this is happening to you, I am almost sure this as Kerry says is down to your progesterone lowering, You have every right to feel emotional but I know this might not sound positive but least this proves that you can get pregnant we just need you to get the help you need to keep pregnant, demand that you want answers and if the nurse dismisses you, write a formal complaint , you need this sorting, you will get your baby, dont loose hope, its going to happen!!

I have my doctors appointment tomorrow, i am going to mention about the spotting, oh thinks i should act daft and ask why i am spotting rather than go in and tell her what i think, I think my plan of action is to tell her i am spotting and tell her I'm sure that is why i am not getting pregnant and ask what i need to do next and then if she says it will be fine il tell her i feel that my progesterone is lowering and that is taking my lining away ,

Spinning how the eck did it get in there?!?! Moment of madness?! Ha ha

Oh and my letter was in the fridge under the ham Not sure it's safe for me to have another baby!!

Yes good idea Pixa I'll go through it with him later. He isn't exactly as clued up on TTC as me.. Obviously.. Ha.. There is no dadsnet!.. But sure he will go through it with me anyway. Thank you

Spins and Pixa thanks for being so nice. The thing is I think it's common NHS practice re two mc or chemicals .. You have to have three for them to do anything you see. So I guess she is just sticking to those rules which I suppose I need to understand. Urgh I don't know I'm so confused by it all.

Oh sparkly. good luck tomorrow, we'll be thinking of you. Xxxx

Sparkly could your DH help you to prepare for the phone call? Maybe take some time out to jot down some points and questions. I know it doesn't come close to having him.at your side, but that way you'll have a (DH supported) prompt with you?

Alpha I kinda felt the CB fertility monitor is pretty much a two in one- the sticks and basically it charts for you. I didn't feel the need for it as I chart myself and from what I could tell the app does more or less what the monitor does and I use the sticks anyway so I felt id be better sticking to that

Sparkly it sounds like you have a lovely and supportive DH. I am in absolute awe of you, your DH is completely right, you show such strength.

Purdie has said it more eloquently than I ever could about needing to get the fertility clinic into gear.