Bring along any luck you can find ..This BESHly fred is brought to you by the magic number 3 - come on Hags, we can Foo it!

The virus could be the culprit cherry, spaff takes about 90 days to make from start to finish. That's why I've had HWHNN on the special menz vitamins since the New Year!

I've not made the call yet It sounds so stupid but I want to give my body the chance to do it's bloody job naturally.

So today was follow up apointment from failed treatment #2 today and a counselling sess which is what brings me to these parts. Between them they have given us plenty of food for thought.

We talked about the poor spaff results this round (very different from 6 months previous) which meant we had to go to ICSI and only one egg of 5 fertilised. Basically this put us on the back foot which meant the odds were not in our favour and that's pretty much all there's to be said.

I really don't think the clinic addressed this problem properly or communicated the clinical implications to us. They admitted fault in this so we now have a spaff improvement plan for ROCH and they have offered to pay the ICSI costs for this one and a future cycle and also free testing and analysis in July as a gesture of goodwill.

We could do some spaff testing, DNA fragmentation and the like, but basically the treatment is the same, antioxidants, vits and mins and a healthy diet/lifestyle. Definitely gonna get us some MeniVit from Australia Bugs, it came highly recommended and I remember your amazing stats on it. Low count most likely due to the virus he had at Christmas but ....? Please let us not both be fucking broken in the reproductive department. Is the universe conspiring against mini coconuts?

I asked about immune testing for me and despite the previous doctor we saw trying to ram this down our throat, the consultant today didn't think we would warrant it yet. She is however, prepared to treat empirically with a half dose of prednisone if we go again. Hurrah!

Interesting news on scratch theory ladiees. Latest thinking is that it benefits IVFers on a fresh cycle most of all because the stimming drucks interfere with lining development. I'm only too happy to knock that one off my list shudder.

We saw the counsellor too and discussed abroad treatment (which has implications of anonymous v traceable donors), adoption, next steps etc. Upshot is we're going to 1.) do healthy eating and living and retest spaff in July 2.) Look into attending an adoption event to find out a bit more about the process to help ROCH in his decision making and resolve our question marks. Thanks for your input into this Rasp if you're reading! 3.) Think carefully about when and where it feels right to go again of we're up for a third go.

But not yet! It's a bit of a relief to have a buy till July on all of this when maybe we'll pick it up in the autumn. And if you've got to the end of this then I salute you!

Hey up hags!
I've spent the last few weeks barely thinking about TTC. It's done wonders for my headspace and been total bliss but I've really missed you guys. I wish we could be gin buddies instead. I've been indulging recently and it's been amazing. Hic. Thanks for thinking of me!

OMG Fizz, you're really at the pointy end, everything crossed for a fishy good news Friday for you and those embies. That's some pretty decent lining you've got going on there too, good work. COW!

The waiting thing is a PITA Rain. It took us 18 months to get from referral to our first cycle because of the wait for donor eggs. I wish we'd looked at the possibility of transferring our funding to a private clinic but then again there was other shit going on in our lives too that didn't exactly make for rational thinking. You'll get there too Blue and Erica. The delays feel like the end of then world but actually I'm a firm believer that everything happens as its meant to.

You do actually have to make that call though Cavemum

Barking I see you've been keeping a low profile too. If you're reading this, solidarity mate, I hope you're in a better place and finding some of the good bits again.

COWWWWWWW for Fizz

Hags, another pregnancy announcement by someone that had and abortion when I started trying and now this is her second. I swear I am not making this shit up.

IVF delay is a bit of a long story and I am on the go but will send updates soon.

Fanks hags! We know that all 5 have defrosted, so now just have to hope they are developing ok. Next time we hear from the clinic will be Friday when they will either get us in then (will be day 3) or on Sunday (day 5).

COW fizz!!!

fizz that's some dedicated hiding! Am yelling COW in your general direction, excellent progress thus far esp. the bum bullets. I have never put anything up my bum in my whole life and I do not like the idea at all, so you have my sympathies!

erica ugh, that's bollocks. I have a friend on #3. She started trying for #2 same time as I started on #1, which took her a year and now she's had a 'surprise' diff while I'm still sat here twiddling my thumbs. Fucking annoying, to say the least. What's up with the ivf delay?

blue it'll be over 20 weeks from the date we were referred by the time of our appointment in June. Our doc initially suggested it would be 12 - similarly would have been tempted to sneak the allowed private cycle in if we'd known it would take so long, but it's nearly here now. Worth making some enquiries maybe?

cave did you make the call?

bad hope work is ok. Am dreading going back in tomorrow, I have to prep a talk for a pretty big industry even in three weeks and I am bricking it already - have done public speaking before but this one is for 'experts' and I keep having cold sweats about not being expert enough!!!

Fist bumps for everyone else!

Budapest was AWESOME, loved every minute! Bit miffed after 5 days away to come back and find Duchess frigging Kate still hasn't produced omfgroyalbabysquee #2 yet. Was hoping it'd be done and dusted and yesterday's chip wrapper by now

Oh shitbags erica third babies? That really is a downer. Here is the sturgeon of solace for you. I discovered today that I have hidden 24 friends on Facebook because of pg announcements/ overload of baby and cute family pics. And two just because they were annoying twats. How come you have to postpone the plans for ivf?

Please keep the COW thoughts coming, hags! I survived the first bum bullet today. Was ok but I actually got a bit tearful momentarily. bonkers So undignified

cavey c'mon woman, pick up the phone and make that call!

Hey hags,

I've been a bit down lately... looks like our 'IVF in the summer' plans will be postponed, got two pregnancy announcements this morning (both were trying for their second when I had my first mc and this is their third!) and I am having pretty bad PMS right now... so feeling rather despondent.

However.... go Fizzy go!!!!!!

Waves to everyone else! I will be back when I can be a bit more articulate than going AAAAAAAAAHGHHGHGHHGGHHGHGH!

blue, that is a long wait alright. Wow.

Fizz, great news that everything is go! But sorry about the bum bullets. It's all so romantic, isn't it, this ttc business?

I work on a research project in a large university, Fizz - it's mostly me shuttered away in an archive, but I have one class a week with post-grad students in the field. The class is six hours, so it's tough going. And on a Monday. But today was my last class! I'll still have a tonne of marking to do, but no more teaching till September at least.

Good growing on the lining Fizz. Keeping all appendages crossed for defrosting. That sucks about the pessaries, but as we all know dignity goes out the window when you're an ESH!

Nothing to report here, psyching myself up to call the Dr for the referral in the next few weeks.

Blimey blue 20+ weeks would do my head in too. Once you've accepted that you are on e assisted conception journeeee the delays are frustrating.

bad I think I missed what you do for a living. Are you leaving a teaching job? Or training and coming to end of a placement?

We are all systems go for defrosting on Wednesday. I now have to get the drugs regime straight in my head. Including horrible bum bullets! Fanjo cams no longer phase me, but the thought of the pessaries... And because I can't remember when I have to start them, I will have to take one to work tomorrow and probably do it there once I've rung the clinic! Aargh. You know all those weird threads you get on MN about not pooing in the loo at work - well this is just taking it up a whole other level

No news here - in the waiting room as I type. Gnnnrrrrr.

Morning hags. Happy Monday (oxymoron).

fizz, any news?

blue, how are you doing? Have you made any decisions?

rain - enjoy Budapest. Lovely city!

I hate Mondays so much. On the upside, this is my last teaching week! Woop!

great news fizz!

blue within the timeframe you've got I'd say some phone calls would be the way to go - I had a list of q's to ask IVF clinics from last year when we went to the open evening at ours but I'm now in Budapest till next tues and don't have access to it. I think it might have been a Berry sourced list so barking might be able to help, but essentially it was querying obvious stuff like pregnancy v live birth rates, long v short protocol etc.

should probably get out of bed and start sight seeing!!

Hola hags - sorry, have been AWOL due to work madness.

blue no idea about the referring to different clinics, or why some don't appear on the hfea website. Sounds odd. Re frosties - at my clinic they hold them for a year, and after that you pay a storage charge (£200 iirc). Not sure if there is a cap on the number of years. We get one funded round, so for any subsequent use of frosties you would need to pay for the drugs and the procedures.

I had a good scan today! Lining is 6.2mm, so not amazing, but given that my worst ever at this stage of proceedings was 3.7 I'm pretty chuffed. And the quality looked good too. The clinic have a meeting tomorrow to review scans and bloods, then we might be defrosting next week. Phone call tomorrow is due in the middle of a yawnsome training course - not sure how I'm going to be able to concentrate!

blue are the options they've offered one's you've already reviewed and ruled out? I'd be tempted to at least call your doc to find out how long it might take to get funding transferred or if it's actually possible (could well be wrong here but I'm assuming private clinics might not want nhs referrals?)

had a rare day at home today to catch up on some big looming deadlines and have procrastinated all day and basically achieved nothing. argh.