The March Bus is rolling through Spunkland stopping for BFPs only!

I can't keep up!!!!!!!! collapses in heap onto floor

Morning all.

To all those feeling down or anxious and to those got AF. Sometimes life is hard isn't it.

lucie lovely to see you! Glad things are going well. Keep us posted.

spinning woo hoo for ov, hope the 2ww doesn't drive you too mad .

I am looking forward to getting back out for a run now it's getting lighter and the weather starts to turn. I've been gymming it all winter but I like to I like to mix it up with running esp on those cold crisp but sunny mornings!

Mumof1, I'm ashamed to say that made me cry. I thank you very, very much for that (and I don't care how needy that sounds) x

Dizzy, did I address you instead of someone else? Wasn't it you who said they had no ewcm and didn't want to bring it up in case two issues would be frowned upon at an appointment? Sorry if I'm confused! Yes, a marathon is an enormous achievement and I actually think it is one of the more incredible human feats.

MaMa, do you know what? I find mindfulness the singularly most difficult thing in the world to do. I suspect that is because I can't bear to 'sit with myself' or to 'live in the moment'. I am forever regretting the past or projecting into the future and finding only more of the same there as is in the present. It was discussed at length in group therapy during my nine months in rehab how low my boredom threshold is; how I am never happy to just 'be'. When I am on holiday - even when I used to be able to go to exotic places - I would lie on the beach and try to just, you know..appreciate the beauty, the serenity, the gloriousness of the day. But I would end up, five minutes later, feeling like: 'Yep, what's next...?'; 'I'm bored of this, what can I do to make this holiday even better?'

I know you want to talk about something else purdey so I won't mention it again but I read your posts & just wanted to say I'm sure all your friends, family, dh & all of us here wouldn't want you to change at all & think you are perfect as you are Hugs x

Dizzy, well done on the marathon, what an amazing achievement. I'm not a great runner but I quite enjoy it. Don't like the treadmill but I use it while it's cold. I do about 4 miles.

No, I'm not seeing anyone about my hang-ups; I've had them forever so they now seem to be part of me. When my GP told me I had PND the other week, and I mentioned that I felt resentful that my husband is currently undertaking a six-week CBT workshop provided by the NHS (hint, hint: could I have some help too?) he replied: 'You know, Purdey, sometimes you just have to fucking do it, you know? Get out there and just...work..or something. I think your placement with Lancs County Council will do you the world of good.' So that was that.

When I look at things rationally I can see that I am kind, I am a good person and I'm a great mum, but I am very very good at self-flagellation too (I don't know how I didn't end up Catholic). I don't want to derail the thread either, so let's talk about summat else, please...

Purple, great news your womb is in good nick. I wish they could check the tubes at the same time; it was only when I had my lap & dye they found a blocked tube. I think probably it will just take you a little while longer to conceive because of your age (I know you're not old like me). Then again, you could fall pregnant this next cycle - there's no rhyme or reason to this malarkey.

Rainy, you sound utterly fed up, love. I'm sorry you feel the need to step back from ttc but I think it's an excellent decision and a wise thing to do if you are young enough. Best of luck for the future

I'm off to a baby group shortly. Yippee

Hugs Purdey, appreciate that you may already be doing this but would definitely recommend that you seek out professional help

Ps purdey, sorry you're having a tough time. You've been such a support to so many of us on here but make sure you look after yourself too

My brown cm purdey? I thought it was ok to get it as long as it wasn't for too long before AF.....do I need to speak to gp?

Thanks guys :) My coil came out in January and it wasn't a hormonal one so I think everything should be back to normal. I guess I'm just confused as this is the first month that I have gone looking for CM rather than relying on what arrives in my pants and yet no EWCM despite the fact that usually it does make itself apparent (had no idea what it was until I joined MN but was aware of it).

Like you say will just have to keep dtd and hope for the best. Am getting way too stressed for my first cycle

Purdey, that's plenty to be getting on with. I don't want to derail the thread bit are you seeing anyone professional? It's hard to ask that sometimes because the point when people really need help is often the time they can least afford it, on terms of cash and time. But it sounds like you could really use someone to talk to, especially about your self esteem.

Have you every practiced mindfulness? I know wet talked about these things as a group yonks ago so sorry if I'm rehashing old stuff.

AF indulgence night tonight. I'm at the local hip pizza spot getting take away (and having a cheeky half while I wait) and watching all these bright young things who probably think you have to use birth control to avoid pregnancy when all you actually have to do is have well timed sex. Bah.

Anyway, then it's a bottle of red wine, pizza and House of Cards.

Dizzy, your GP is on more than £100k a year. Ask him about the cm.

I'm really sorry about AF's arrival for so many of you. There are no words to describe this disappointment

MaMa, the way I see it, I am unsettled because I am anxious; I am anxious because DH has lost his job and is (for reasons I won't keep banging on about) largely unemployable; I feel unfulfilled because I honestly thought having a baby would change my life irrevocably, changing me with it. I thought I would become calmer, kinder, more patient, more lovely, less ragey, more loving of myself, more tolerant, less opinionated, more in love with the world. But I'm still me.

So sorry rainy & mama. Dizzy sorry af seems to be on her way. She really is a witch!

Eek fingers crossed for you wotsits. What test are you using?

Night it sounds like you might have just ov'd. I would keep dtd for a couple of nights for good measure, but others may have better advice. If you're worried the Dr can do a blood test to check you're ovulating & everything is as it should be (I had it 1st time ttc as the whole thing stressed me out so much).

Spinning hope the 2ww goes quickly for you.

So sorry rainy & mama. Dizzy sorry af seems to be on her way. She really is a witch!

Eek fingers crossed for you wotsits. What test are you using?

Night it sounds like you might have just ov'd. I would keep dtd for a couple of nights for good measure, but others may have better advice. If you're worried the Dr can do a blood test to check you're ovulating & everything is as it should be (I had it 1st time ttc as the whole thing stressed me out so much).

Spinning hope the 2ww goes quickly for you.

Night... I only find ewcm if I go looking for it. It never seems to make my pants!

Re CM loads of environmental (food,drink, drugs, health) stuff can affect it. Try not to worry. Sometimes I have to root round up there to find any as it doesn't always hit your pants. Try not to worry,

Heir - I'd be interested to know the answer if you do ask as I've only ever sen ewcm once.... And I couldn't be 100% sure it wasn't leftover spermies ?? Xx

night I wouldn't worry too much, it's not that long since you had your coil out is it? Could your body still be settling down?

Morning spinning! I never usually run early, but I've got a training course today and I don't need to be at work until 10am. Thought I'd take advantage of the 6am temping alarm call to get out before the sun came up. Lovely! Should do it more often! Today I ran my standard 4.5 miles but at the moment I do anything up to about 7 miles, time permitting. A year ago I was running up to 20 miles as I did my first marathon but this ttc malarkey this year has distracted me and I'd probably die if I tried to run more that 10 at the moment .

Hugs for you Dojo and Rainy, look after yourselves.

I've been looking back and concluded that although I get positive opk and temp rise, I never see any ewcm - it seems to just stay white and creamy the whole time. Do you think this is something to worry about?? I am going to see my GP this afternoon about something totally unrelated to TTC, but may bring it up with him (though they probably hate it when you go for one thing and then say 'oh and whilst I'm here'...)

Congrats MrsCat :)

Sorry for those who have had AF arrive

Spinning it is v tasty, much better than shop beans in my opinion!

CM related question again! Last cycle I had one day of clear watery followed by two days of ewcm and then it dried up (this is going by what was visible in my pants). This month I had the watery creamy stuff that may have been sperm and then two days of clear watery stuff and today it has dried up (has followed the same pattern of cycle days as last month just different types of CM). Ovia is panicking me by saying that if I am dry at this point in my cycle I should go to the doctor! Have I not ovulated? :(

Sorry to all those struggling and feeling down
I'm hanging in here for glittery retesting. Looks promising :)
And congrats mrs on the bfp may it be a sticky heathy bean. X

Morning

Purple, thanks for reporting back with the scan info. Pleased it went ok. Maybe mine won't be internal.

Sorry af has arrived for you mamapo and rainy

Rainy, sorry you're down and leaving us. Af arriving is always such a downer. What is your doctor doing for you?

Dizzy, sorry it looks like af's on her way. Well done on the early run, how far do you run? Its too cold for me at the moment and I did an early morning workout at home. Itching to get out running again and now the lighter mornings are here I must make more effort.

Ff confirmed ov for me this morning and puts me at 3dpo.