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Conception

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Original poster

23 year old single and have been thinking about having a baby

136 replies

Tannedbarbie1 · 20/02/2015 03:27

Hey girlies,

So I'm 23 years old 24 in may! And I've been thinking about having a child for the past 6 months, i would love to be a mother and have a beautiful baby. But I'm single so don't know if it's the right move. Financially I can definitely do it I work from home so no worries there, but the responsibility does scare me! Most my friends are having babies now and I'd love one, but im single. Alot of my friends have supportive family, i don't really have a big family at all, i only live with my mum and I live miles from the rest of my family. But I know I can do it. If anyone has had these feelings let me know, I get the feeling I wont meet a guy and il leave it to Late

Xxx

OP posts:
TerryTheGreenHorse · 21/02/2015 22:59

I thought Brooki didn't want to continue our friendly chat, I live in hope. Grin

Enormouse · 21/02/2015 22:58

Not you not Smile. I'm just getting annoyed at brookis repetitive assertions that 29 is old.

I turn 26 soon, I'm getting up there Grin.

Arsenic · 21/02/2015 22:57

Scotch. Lovely. I'll join you Smile

Notrevealingmyidentity · 21/02/2015 22:56

I wasn't trying to suggest it was ! I was trying to demonstrate from what brooki was saying.

Enormouse · 21/02/2015 22:55

arsenic pour me a scotch, please.

Enormouse · 21/02/2015 22:54

29 is not older.

Notrevealingmyidentity · 21/02/2015 22:54

Regardless of 29 or 39 there is nothing wrong with being an older mother. It is not selfish. That is where you are pissing people off.

Arsenic · 21/02/2015 22:53

Well this is interesting Grin

Anyone for Wine ?

brickiemum2 · 21/02/2015 22:51

BarbieI think it's biologically fair to say that in general pregnancy can be easier at a younger age but statistics can never be asked to an individual as many young mums have terrible pregnancies and births just through bad luck/chance. It's therefore not a reason to feel urgency. My mum was a relatively young mum (21) and I was a slightly older mum (30) each of us went for it when we felt the time was right. Both of us were in a stable relationship though which I do feel helps immensely. Being a fabulous single parent is perfectly possible but it is so much harder than having a relationship where you are supported.

Brooki25 · 21/02/2015 22:51

Every1 seems to jump on that. My friend, said 29 year old. Had a massively difficult pregnancy, that the doctor told her was because of her age. I did not say 29 was old to have a child. I said when she had her first child she was fine, the 2nd was horrendous. Because she was "older" That is a fact, not an ill formed opinion

Notrevealingmyidentity · 21/02/2015 22:50

*she

Notrevealingmyidentity · 21/02/2015 22:50

Mage must be. I refuse to believe people can be that ignorant.

TerryTheGreenHorse · 21/02/2015 22:49

Teenager? Nicked your mums ipad?

TerryTheGreenHorse · 21/02/2015 22:48

She is probably just trying to pick a fight. Luckily no normal person gives a shiny shit what age other people decide is right for them to have children.

Brooki25 · 21/02/2015 22:48

Me rude.... Pot kettle lv

Do you have any knowledge on the morning after pill, how effective it is ect? If not I really don't want to continue this friendly chat with you Smile

Enormouse · 21/02/2015 22:47

Jesus Christ, a lot's happened since I last posted.

I thought the mums with more life experience (don't want to be ageist here) have been lovely, fair and balanced. And have offered sound advice.

You otoh brooki have not. And your posts about older mums (at 29 ffs!) are bonkers and misinformed. And offensive.

Notrevealingmyidentity · 21/02/2015 22:46

brook you are most certainly coming across as stupid and nasty. I have no opinion on young vs old mothers but even I can see your "opinion" that older mothers are selfish is a load of rubbish.

TerryTheGreenHorse · 21/02/2015 22:45

Gosh Brooki I wonder why people didn't like your posts.

It's nothing to do with your age and everything to do with your rude ill formed opinions.

Original poster
Tannedbarbie1 · 21/02/2015 22:39

I don't think age matters when becoming a mother! Being younger or older does not make you a better mother. But as I've read it's alot easier on your body younger as it's been proven, but that doesn't mean older mum's can't handle it because they can, but I've always wanted kids younger because id like to be very active with my kids and be around when they had kids, I'm not saying younger is better but it is easier on the body. Age has nothing to do with being a good mother.

OP posts:
Brooki25 · 21/02/2015 22:37

A bit more than sneery!

So I'm dim, unpleasant, stupid and nasty? Because you don't like my opinion, after what some of you lot said about young mothers & needing a perfect dad for said child.
Wow!
I don't care what any of you think of me, I just told the young woman what I thought.

It seems like a lot of bitterness on this site. Ironically I only became a member for advice on the morning after and stumbled across this thread.

Thankfully I did, as I think you lot have forgot what a discussion is (without insulting)

Two side to every coin.

TerryTheGreenHorse · 21/02/2015 22:34

Oo a camp let me in for a Brew

I'm not sleeping in a tent though dear, not at my age. Grin

Arsenic · 21/02/2015 22:25

TBH I thought some people had been sneery about younger mothers.

But all the advice to the OP for her to wait in her circs was good.

Women have a 20+ year window in which to procreate. This 'two camp' situation is false and faintly silly IMVHO, since competence and preparedness for parenthood is an individual thing.

I wish we could all drop it.

Arsenic · 21/02/2015 22:20

Brooki you are presenting a wonderful argument for why dim people shouldn't have children? Did you realise?

Run along and play with your puppets, there's a dear.

TerryTheGreenHorse · 21/02/2015 22:18

I'm going with A.

Everyone was perfectly ok to the OP on this thread. No one started being unkind about younger mothers, by that I am assuming we are going for early twenties.

You are the one starting with the nonsense.

Notrevealingmyidentity · 21/02/2015 22:18

I'm not really sure what seeing your grandchildren has to do with it. Plenty of people choose not to have children... Even if you have your child young it's not a guarantee of grandchildren.

How bizarre.