Angels and Rainbows - remembering our angels and praying for rainbows (thread2)

Oh that's good, I was wondering about an early scan myself. I've told my sister and my very best friend but that's it. I don't want to get anyone's hopes up (!) and I'm barely registering any excitement myself so I think I'll just leave it until I start showing or something!

Sorry to hear about your friend Kayleigh.

Flambola - I have my scan is on 18th March. I live abroad and luckily have good insurance and so they would scan at this early stage regardless of me being high risk (I'd be just under 7 weeks then). I will also be having a cervical length check I imagine. I then have to make arrangements to have my cervical stitch in the UK (I found a specialist there) at 12 weeks. I'm going to be so scared to book flights and jinx things! We haven't really told anyone - have you? x

I'm glad your friend is doing ok, under the circumstances, Kayleigh.

My consultant appointment has finally come through for next Tuesday. I hope we can get some answers. I also need to tell my GP I'm pregnant but I'm a bit scared, would you believe it?

April - when's your scan? I can totally understand your fears, I think it's just a case of taking it a day at a time.

Kayleigh glad to hear your friend is doing as well as can be expected.

I'm due 9th October although should be induced around 38 weeks so hopefully a late September baby.

Thank you madem and flambola.

april i know exactly what you mean, pregnancy is daunting and emotional at the best of times, never mind after what we've all been trough. I hope your scan goes well.

Well my friend's angel was born last night she seems to be doing as well as can be expected. She'd sent me a message this morning so i'm glad she's made contact with me, even though i'd have understood if she hadn't got in touch yet. She's planning to have baby cremated and the ashes buried with her dad which i think is a lovely idea

Hi all just reading and running. I'll be due by 6th Nov by LMP so similar time to a few of you. It's so scary to think about miscarriages etc. My 'danger' period is the end of the second trimester but there's so many other danger periods to consider too. I am so scared for my 7 week scan next week. I guess we just have to be as positive as possible and just accept it's not going to be an easy ride xxx

And I think winter and I are quite close too. I'm 9th November by LMP. I stalk the November thread but just cannot actually join any of them!

Think if everything works out this time round should be due around 18th October. But we will see!

... By the NHS website calculations, my due date would be the 2nd November. Which would be my 30th birthday. Wouldn't that be a nice gift? It's all I want in the world!

Hi everyone, thanks for all your congratulations. I'm still in denial over it. I understand what everyone means about skipping the due date threads. You have the 12 and 20 weeks 'hurdles' to get past, but for us we know how quickly things can change, how sometimes you can get the whole way through and still not come out with a baby. I wish we didn't. Are there a few of us who are due about the same time? I can't keep up with everything.

Sorry to hear about your friend, Kayleigh, and yours, Mademoiselle.

I still haven't had a consultant appointment yet. It's driving me round the bend.

Oh kayleigh ...how bloody awful. A friend of mine miscarried today. She miscarried at 13 weeks a few months ago - a proper kick in the teeth, when you think you're relatively safe. Oh heck, why????

vicky hope your booking in appointment went well.

AFM today has been a bloody awful day. A fellow friend who is pregnant went for her 20 week scan today and was told her baby had died . It's so awful because while she's my friend, the father of the baby and his brother are the closest thing i have to brothers (our mum have been close friends for 30 years). I've sent my friend a message expressing my sympathy and letting her know i'm here for her, but i have a feeling she'll be giving me a wide berth for a while- which i can understand because i'd have reacted the same way after Ben had anybody close to me been expecting at the time. I so wish life wasn't so rubbish

Hi all, a quiet congratulations to madem here's keeping all our fingers and toes crossed.

Sorry to not name check everyone but reading and running. Waiting for midwife as have home visit for booking in appointment this morning, after that it's going to be a quiet one feeling it bleh... Should be carrying a 6 month old around today ??

madem it's actually gone quite quickly for me too, i think having the older 2 at school helps because during the week i'm focusing on getting them to and from school and doing homework ect. I'm wishing you a quiet congratulations, i know when i rang EPU at my hospital they said i had to be 6 weeks and they'd scan me- would that be an option for you?

lake i was nervous (it didn't help being in the vicinity of THAT room though) but the sonographer was very understanding. At my hospital they've now updated the scan rooms so you can see the scan on a big tv in front of you (meaning no craning your neck round) and he was very quick in finding the heartbeat for us. For me it helped having that understanding from someone. It's lovely that your mum wants to come to the scan, despite her working nights.

Lake I'm not sure... I probably will as the Fetal Medical Unit will offer me one - but what reassurance does it actually bring?....
Must. Think. Positively.

Kayleigh congratulations a relief to know you've got through the first trimester and got yourself a little fidget too.

Were you nervous before the scan? I know it's irrational but I keep having moments where I just keep thinking it's all going to go wrong at some point. Going to lay off the October groups and FB page for a while as all they seem to talk about are miscarriages and missed miscarriages and the chances and the exact sizes of the babies on early scans, it's driving me a little crazy. I just wish having a stillbirth gave me a free pass for my next pregnancy. I need to stop thinking about it but it's so hard. Not sure quite how sane I'm going to be in another 31 weeks!! (If I'm lucky only 29weeks as they want to induce me at 38)
My mum asked to come to the scan although she is working nights so feel bad for telling her but she seems to think she'll be ok only sleeping for half a day crazy lady!

Congratulations madem, will you get some early reassurance scans this time? Good luck and I hope you manage a stress free and positive pregnancy!!

Wow, so much to catch up on, such lovely news about your BFP flambola and april ! Congratulations and cheers to a peaceful, totally normal and uneventful 8-and something months ahead.
And Kayleigh I am delighted to hear you're already 13+3 - that has gone so quickly (for me - must have felt like a lifetime for you!) and I am so pleased everything seems to be as it should. And how brilliant that Brian finally has a statement. This will really make such a difference to his education and to the provision the school are able to get for him.
Lake you colleague sounds a delight...!
LittleTulip so nice to hear from you and so nice to have good news.
Cake - thinking about you and your dh. I hope you're ok. Please stay - like others have said, it really isn't an actual ttc bus on here, it doesn't matter that you aren't ttc!
Yummy so true what you say about the reasons behind ttc... but ultimately, the dearly hoped for end result is a baby. We have a 3yo dd here too and she is forever asking me why she doesn't have a sister. Why is there no baby in your tummy mummy? Why do I not have a baby sister?...Oh little one, if only you really understood...

AFM - my suspicions were confirmed, positive pregnancy test. I had an early mc though since losing G this Summer and these buses just shows us all too well how badly everything can go in no time, so as I am not even 5 weeks yet, I am trying not to get excited. I jus want to fast forward and know already whether it's worth being happy or whether all my hopes will get crushed again... Oh for the innocence of my first pregnancy!

yummy i too felt similar to you regarding ttc again. We had to put it on hold for a few weeks due to the consultant wanting me to have bloods done a few weeks after birth, but that time gave us some space to talk openly and make sure we were on the same page.

ellie thank you for thinking of me today.

AFM scan went well, i'm measuring 13+3, and i've got another little wriggler. The sonographer doing the scan was lovely- he didn't assume that today was my first scan with this pregnancy and was very compassionate when we explained about Ben and even told me he had tissues if i needed them, which put me at ease. I asked him about future scans and not going into room 1, and he said to ring up before the scan and ask not to be put in there and the hospital will do all they can to accommodate us. We also got the fantastic news today that ds1 (Brian) has got his statement of special educational needs (or EHCP as it's now known) which is a huge relief as it means he'll get the support he needs through school

Congratulations flambola and april!!! Wishing you as stress free a pregnancy as you can possibly manage. Am hoping some of this bfp luck rubs off on me, currently in my 2ww so trying to keep busy and distract myself.

ducky Sounds like you've always got something going on! Hope ds is feeling ok and you get on ok at the doctors. I feel you pain as although I didn't have an episiotomy, I developed an infection and it isn't pleasant.
little Glad your consultant appointment went well. Couldn't give you any advice on delivery methods but hopefully with all the information you consultant gives you, you can come to a decision you're comfortable with.
Kayleigh I'll be thinking of you today, hope everything goes well and being back in the same place doesn't bring up too much.

yummy I felt very similar to you in that I wondered whether I was ttc for the right reasons, I came to the same conclusion though. I was wary of ttc too soon to fill the 'hole' in my life, but I originally started ttc because I wanted a family and that hasn't changed. I'm glad that although you were disappointed it has confirmed how you really feel.

Thank you for all your lovely welcomes etc. it's sad that we're all here but at least we know we have other people to talk too that won't hate any if us for having a moan or anything!

Still struggling with decisions but had realised dear old 'aunt flo' was late so we took a test which was negative.. But it did confirm for me that I miss being pregnant and I am desperate to make my beautiful 3 year old a big sister. I'm still unsure if these are the right reasons but then, will it ever be any different? I'll always want those things so maybe I'm just reading too much into it.

Congratulations to those who announced they're pregnant, sending hugs and my fingers are crossed for you all.

X

Congratulations to both april and flambola

lake i doubt anyone would feel like you are asking too much of them if you were to ask them to accompany you to your scan, although i'm sure your bereavement midwife would try her best to be there if that's what you wanted.

tulip i'm so pleased your scan went well, and it sounds like your sonographer was very thorough too. Although i'm a few weeks behind you with my rainbow pregnancy, my consultant has already said that it's unlikely i'll be going to "term", but i'm assuming they'll induce me like they did with Ben as c-sections haven't been mentioned.

ducky your poor little man ! He's having a bit of a rotten time isn't he? I hope he starts to feel better soon

AFM well scan day is tomorrow. It seems to have crept up on me very quietly. I feel nervous, but i'm glad i won't have to go into the room i was scanned in with Ben (although i will have to walk past it)

April and flambola congratulations

Tulip glad your scan went well, must be hard to come up with a plan have the midwives been much help or is it something you have to decide alone? Good luck

He has a cold ATm little! One thing after another!
Glad your scan went well

In terms of the options I was given, the consultant said I could have a c sec at 39 weeks or induction at 38 weeks but she did say due to what happened last time she would ok to do either at 37 weeks if I feel I have to. I was going to be induced with dd but went into labor myself the night before, they think it was due to stress. I was booked to be induced with ds at 38 weeks but had a total breakdown at 36 weeks saying I couldn't cope because I didn't know whether he was moving or not so they moved my induction to to 37 weeks.. It took 3 days it was fine tho, I think it seemed more painful with dd because of the outcome but I managed fine with just g&a with ds, it was a very difficult decision though x

Hello my lovely ladies!

Sorry I have not been around, but I do think of you all on this journey.

Viking, winter, redsky, Anna , Yummy welcome to our thread - I am so sorry for your losses. A bit of background from me, I lost my first baby boy 'A' at 25 weeks in August 2013 after ttc for 18 months. I just stopped feeling him move, and like many of the ladies on this forum they didn't find a cause. We pretty much started to ttc straight away for our second which didn't happen, after numerous tests I found out that I have a blocked tube. We were referred for ivf, double bummer after losing a child. However after my first ivf appointment I found out I had a natural bfp. You could probably say I am one of the old timers on here, it is so saddening to see so many women join this thread although most of the time they leave as they now have their lovely rainbows.

ATM - so so pleased for you and many congratulations on your rainbow baby. I hope you are enjoying lots of newborn cuddles. I can totally relate to you crying and crying in disbelief that she is actually here. I still can't believe I am pregnant with rainbow and find it hard to comprehend that I might have an earth baby in a few months time.

Ellie, can't believe your sil. How bloody insensitive! I'm glad she apologised.

Made glad you are feeling better, did you test?

Cake! Please don't feel like you have to stay away because you are not ttc. This thread is not about that. It is for anybody that has lost a baby. It is the worst thing anybody has to ever go through, I do hope your DH makes a swift recovery.

Vicky, great news regarding heartbeat! Hope it is all uneventful from now on.

Critter, so pleased your 20 week scan went well! I hope you are starting to get lots of little movements now from James' brother.

Flambola and April gentle congratulations to you! I saw your other thread, that is most definitely a cross! Have you had a date to see the consultant yet?

Ducks how is little one doing? I hope he is feeling better after his vaccinations.

Kayleigh, lake, hope your upcoming scans are as uneventful as ever. Lake I'm sure your bereavement midwife will be more than happy to accompany you.

As for me I am doing ok. Had my 20 week scan last week, it seemed to go on for ages. The sonographer that did it is a specialist in high risk pregnancies, she seemed to take ages looking at everything. I think I held my breath for the entire scan! But all was ok, and similar to you critter its another boy for me too. I am excited but petrified at the same time.

I had my second consultant meeting too. He was great. I'm due to have a growth scan in a few more weeks and he has asked me to start thinking about delivery methods. Which I can't really get my head round. I'm so scared of an induction because of what I went through with 'A', the pain was horrific and I had every painkiller under the sun; however I'm also worried about causing more infertility after having a c section. Those with rainbows did you get this option? What helped you choose? The Consultant was pretty firm with me and said he won't let me get anywhere near my due date, dependant on scans if baby needs to come mid June then that is going to happen. I guess I have been pretty much ignoring my pregnancy up until now but time seems to be ticking and I know I need to do some reading and start thinking about buying things. In my head I need to get past 25+3, the point when I lost 'A'.

Waves to all, sorry about the extra long post!

Kayleigh, you aren't being unreasonable at all. I think most people have that 'innocence' about pregnancy about them and it makes them incredibly self centred

Lake, I'm sure they would happily re arrange for you, but if you would prefer to stick to the date maybe ask the bereavement midwife, mine came to a few with me and was always happy to do so I'm sure she wouldn't mind she always said to me 'just because your pregnant doesn't mean I will stop being there for you' she was lovely

April and flambola that great news! Hope everything goes smoothly for you both

Well think I'm going to have to book a gp appt, I have no idea what is happening with AF any more and I think I might have a problem with my episiotomy