ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #2

I have all my fingers and toes crossed that theses recent BFP stay sticky and healthy. I've had one MMC and that seems like plenty enough. I've read about the Asprin link too and in your situation brummie i think i'd take it too. I really hope it helps.

So i'm totally toturing myself, please tell me i'm not the only one!
MMC was 26 days ago. I stopped bleeding 14 days ago and we started DTD a day or two later. On a normal cycle i would have ovulated around then which would have meant i'd be due to test this thrusday. My last BFP i got 3 days before my period was due so i tested today - BFN. However, i think i ovulated 5 days ago which obviously wouldn't show a BFP. We accidently concieved DS and caught first month with the baby we lost which is all getting my hopes up but after reading some of the stories on here, i really shouldn't.

Am i mad to even think i could concieve this cycle? I'm scared if i get my period its going to hit me really hard :( i'm likely to keep testing intermittently for the next 2 or so weeks and then be gutted when AF arrives. It's the only thing keeping me going though. Sorry it's so me me me.

Thanks for the stats Envious, very reassuring.

thanks for the stats envious. I'm going to assume that since MC2 was a trisomy there's no underlying reason so therefore my chance is only 0.8!

gr33dy St Marys Paddington (London). Same as the Duchess of Cambridge, although perhaps in an ever so slightly less attractive room...

charlie which St Marys? I'm near ish to Manchester but come under Pennine Trust, and have wondered if I could go to St Marys instead if I fall pregnant again.

Hah know the feeling!!!!!!!

oh thanks, you reminded me to print out cone biopsy letter for the midwife. Honestly, I wish my hoo-ha would just bloody behave itself!!!

No problem at all. I'm not high risk due to mc's - I'm high risk because I've had a cone biopsy and a letz on my cervix and I've got extensive scar tissue which means I could struggle to dilate so it's pretty much a c section for me. Which I was told at the time of the procedures. Also had several colposcopies following those and my scarring always gets commented on!

I was classed as high risk under Birmingham and was consultant care due to all that. The mc was just an added brucie bonus!!!

That's pretty much what I'm hoping envious and monten... it was something I read in Prof Regan's book, that she had a patient come to her having had three separate trisomies and asked what she could do, to which Prof Regan answered unfort not much. So I'm just praying that this one is going to be ok.
I'm off to my company's office on the continent for the next 2 weeks, armed with my european health care card in case anything goes wrong! I'm going to tell our office manager I'm preg as I'm totally going to be calling her if I have to go to the hosp... no way I'm negotiating a possible 3rd MC in a foreign language. Then my 8w private scan the day I get back! At least I will hopefully be distracted while I'm away.

brummie if you don't mind me asking why are you high risk? Is having 2 mcs enough? My GP seemed to think I'd be assigned to the high risk group at st marys but then someone on either this board or the recurrent mc board (I can't remember who) said she didn't think I would be.

Have spent the afternoon searching out all my records from MCs 1 & 2 for when I get a booking in appt. FUN.

Ooh no Charlie not at all - I'm terrified at thought of taking aspirin but I'm also terrified of not taking it!!!

If doc tells me no, I probably will stop - I'm torn. I know it can help but I haven't been tested.

As for an early scan - I move house to Redditch next Friday so I will be a brummie no more... As I need consultant care I will come under Worcester Royal Hospital. I believe you can self refer to their EPAU so going to try that!! Redditch have downgraded their maternity services to midwife only so high risk are looked after at Worcester.

So will ask and see what answer I get....

Good luck both of you BFP-ers!!

Both of mine were chromosomal problems (different ones) but if I suspected it was a clotting issue I would be tempted by aspirin too - apart from the fact I am severely allergic to it!

I've just been googling and found a research paper that I found comforting:

Traditionally, the diagnosis of recurrent pregnancy loss is not made until a woman has lost at least three pregnancies. Overall about 20% of pregnancies end in miscarriage due to a non-recurrent cause. So, the risk of two consecutive losses is 20% of 20% or 4% of women will experience two losses. The odds of three losses would be 0.16%

Two unrelated losses in a row is extremely bad luck. Three would be crazy.

brummie just in case it seemed like I was having a go at you, I absolutely was not. I was just trying to run through the pros & cons. As I said, some people swear by it so it's really a personal decision. Since every stat says that in at least 50% of MCs no particular cause can be identified I think there's absolutely no issue in throwing whatever at the problem! Multiple MCs are a complete b*tch and make you question anything and everything about your body & your dh's swimmers.

Good luck with the GP... mine was unsurprisingly a combo between helpful & hopeless... she kept saying "I suppose you're completely panicking" to which I felt like saying "WELL I AM NOW!" I told her I was cramping and she was like "ok well let us know if you start bleeding there's nothing you can do" which I know is true but a little bedside manner would have been ok too :/
But after 2MCs I just wanted to get it all in the system. I've also already referred myself to maternity at St Marys, which is pretty close to me so hope the MWs get back to me soon with booking in etc. I just want to be in the system!

brummie sorry if I asked already, but are you going to book a priv early scan?

And just to add, I also was tested after my ERPC and there was absolutely nothing wrong with the tissue . It definitely wasn't a defect of any sort. If it had been then like Charlie I probably wouldn't be taking the aspirin.

As Charlie said, it's to allow more blood to flow to the uterus but when you google it, there is very mixed opinions. I must stress it is 75mg aspirin which is designed for people who have had strokes or heart attacks and not your bog standard 300mg pain relief one.

But yes you can buy it over the counter. I made the decision with my DP and we felt that potentially I was at more risk of miscarriage by not than if I did take it. I do know that I clot very very quickly so taking blood from me is a nightmare.

I have agonised over this - no idea if doing the right thing - but I do know i am more scared of having a 3rd mc.

That said I am now seeing the doctor next Tuesday and I will mention it and see what they say.

I feel like I'm damned either way to he honest!!!

Ah cross post, thanks Charlie x

Ah cross post, thanks Charlie x

Brummie I've heard of Doctors telling people who have had 2/3 MCs to start takin aspirin when they fell pregnant but I can't remember the reasoning behind it... Do you know what its for? x

@chasing aspirin's a bit of a controversial "treatment" for recurrent MCs. There's not been a large clinical study done on it, so everyone has a different opinion. Aspirin essentially thins the blood so the idea is that it may help the blood flow easier to the uterus. But there have been study/s which showed that taking aspirin possibly increased the chance of MC. I think generally Docs prefer to establish that you have a clotting problem before putting you on it, but as it's over the counter it's really up to you. My 2cents - I asked my GP and she said absolutely not, so I haven't, but my last MC was a trisomy so not related to uterus or hormone probs at all. That's why brummie said it's controversial.

Oh Monten I'm so sorry you feel so horrendous.

I know that feeling - my grief was blindsiding me. In the end I had counselling and I still am.

I know what you mean though about needing to do something - I found I liked the Clearblue opk's because I felt I could do something at the right time. We didn't use them whilst on holiday and I stressed about not DTD on the right day.

Stuff I also did this month - I used Preseed how it should be used - with the applicator rather just as a lube. I also took cough medicine and I also took evening primrose oil from start of cycle to ovulation.

Have no idea if worked or just random luck.

I've also booked my doctors appointment so I can confirm
It and get recorded. Feel like it's a race against time to get down there and registered before something goes wrong.

I also admit I've done something quite controversial - I've decided to start taking 75mg aspirin a day in case that was the cause of my last 2.

We have thought long and hard about this and felt that if we had a 3rd mc we would kick ourselves and say "why didn't we try the aspirin"

It's quite common to take in the US as a "take it and see what happens, can't hurt not too" although uk docs aren't quite like that.

Like you Monten I feel like I must do something!!!!!

Congratulations chook, that's lovely to hear! I hope the rest of your pregnancy progresses smoothly too.

monten love, coming on here and expressing your fears is never self indulgent. We're all in the same boat! All I can say is what I remind myself of frequently, that everyone in real life I know who has had multiple MCs (unfortunately that's quite a few people) still has had children at some point.
I've never used the clearblue advanced, this month I tracked temps (which were all over the place so no help there) and used cheapy opks. Actually it was noticing EWCM for the first time ever that made me twig that it was time to be DTDing and we were lucky as I'm 5w tomorrow! It's taken at least 3 cycles after each MC to get preg again. I'm pretty convinced it just happens when it happens (although obv DTD at the right time is key!). I can utterly identify with wanting to throw as much as possible at it, so if using digi OPKs makes you feel better, then I say go for it! TBH the things that have made a big difference to me were counselling and acupuncture & massage 1x per week.
People who tell me to relax (and there are a lot of them) basically make me want to punch them in the face (how's that for relaxation?!) I just say, go with your gut & what works for you and try to block everyone else out!

Thank you for coming on chookford. It is really lovely to hear positive stories.

Thinking positively, I have a question for anyone using the Clearblue Advanced Fertility Monitor. Is it worth it? I've been using the Clearblue dual hormone digital OPKs and really liking them actually. I was worried I would get too obsessed but actually I am finding they make me feel calmer and I enjoy doing them because it makes me feel like I am 'doing' something every month. Which makes me think I might like the monitor. Would be interested to hear anyone else's experiences.