ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #2

snoopy My OU materials for my January module landed on my doorstep yesterday, I've set them out on the coffee table and I'm off stationery shopping tomorrow to cheer myself up yes I'm a stationery saddo and the DDs are at their Dads this weekend Fri-Sun so planning to get stuck into those whilst DH goes off with his siblings to watch John Bishop live. I'd be going along too, but last time I was in a crowded place - Cineworld waiting to watch the S8 Ep1 of Dr Who I had a mega panic attack and I really can't be bothered with the risk that will happen again so I am staying at home. At least that way I know DH will have a good time and I won't feel guilty for asking him to leave with me.

Hope you get good news from the GP re thyroid and other stuff. As for ovulating when bleeding that wouldn't surprise me one bit, I have a very strange cycle.

treacle I'm quite spontaneous reckless with major decisions such as this so it wouldn't surprise me at all if I chucked them in the bin after a few weeks. DH is the more careful thinker. Heres hoping AF does not arrive this weekend. Don't worry about a few glasses of wine, my midwife told me a few years ago that the baby is and I quote "still rolling around in its own sac and not attached via a placenta at that point so stop winding yourself up about the Baileys and cigarettes the weekend before your BFP." I liked her a lot! didn't stop the unreasonable Mum guilt but hey ho!

mrsdiddly Oh if only I could sink a glass bottle of wine, however the meds I'm on (anxiety meds & mega strong penicillin for a gum infection) mean I cannot. I had a small glass of Baileys at my Great Grans funeral this time last year and ended up passed out on the sofa 2 hours later with everyone thinking I'd sunk the whole bottle! As if I would I totally would and do have previous form for it

Heres to a better weekend for everyone on this thread.

hey ladies, hows everyone doing?

Sorry I had to come on for a moan....

So a good friend of mine has announced she's 9 weeks pregnant and this is her second pregnancy since my DH and I got married last year (her DD is eight months old). Is it wrong that im really peeved off? I am happy and wish her and her partner a healthy happy pregnancy but im so upset. And the neurotic side of me is saying well 'cause you're jealous you'll never get pregnant.

On top of this I told husband tonight that i finally feel like im moving on and accepting, this is our third month off ttc since losing our little girl (currently 5 dpo) and i told him that if we do get a bfn this month im going to try to step back from the obsessing over peeing on sticks and ovulation kits etc. :( why is m/c and ttc so cruel?

thanks for listening x

envious i think since you've had a negative pregnancy test, i'd believe the OPK.

I feel the same heaven, af is due sunday and so I'm in a really tricky place. Do i drink or not? Can't deal with people asking me of im pregnant but I'd be worried if I'd had a few drinks then got a bfp.

Sigh. Wrote a post at lunchtime and mn crashed. Kind of sums up my day. Work sucks. Tired and not feeling the TTC zone we are in. Dh's bike has been nicked from the station. And the house seems to be falling apart around me. Hooray. Not. Sorry for the grumble.

snoopy I thought you could ov whilst still bleeding, but that's with a regular cycle as opposed to a wtf or post mc one. No idea why I think that though. I know some ladies bleed a bit when they ov too. Good news about the blood test.

heaven knows the only way I know how to survive work parties is to have a drink. Maybe just see how you're feeling tomo. You aren't being tripped up by silly things in my opinion. Please don't beat yourself up about feeling emotional. Your mmc is a big deal and it takes time... More than you think... To recover. You shouldn't have had to deal with a call like that. Have an unmn hug.

stocking you're doing nothing wrong choosing to have a break. Don't rush feeling better. You're doing nothing wrong. We're trying to continue TTC. Again. And its tough. Almost regretting it. Try to enjoy the holiday season... Easier said than done but enjoy a few glasses of guilt free

Nearly the weekend. Anyone anything nice planned? I have 101 things to do. . . just wanna veg. And hide.

Hi all,

I've been lurking for awhile. I had a MMC at the start of September and am on the TWW of my second cycle since then. Mostly holding it together but have spent part of this afternoon crying in the toilets at work because someone called to ask if I still needed free prescriptions. Still getting tripped up by silly things like that.

Also have works Xmas do tomorrow and am tempted to have a drink or two because it's Xmas and I don't get out much, but also scared to as could be pregnant and theres a good chance I'll get emotional and start crying into my turkey dinner :(. Will probably have to put with speculation as to why I'm not drinking to boot, argh!

Any advice on how to survive the works party much appreciated!

Stocking, definitely take a break but I would say that I felt exactly the same and then suddenly changed my mind.
Don't feel bad about how you're feeling either.

Hmmm just back from the gp. I'm having a blood test tomorrow for thyroid antibodies so I'm pleased with that.

But the gp said I could ovulate when I'm still bleeding has anyone else had that advice?

Stockingfullofcoal, I'm so sorry you're feeling so down. If you're feeling this way it's probably best to take a break, do some non baby things until your ready. I'm looking at all the plants I bought last year when I was quite into gardening, I've neglected them for the last three months, maybe its time to sort them out.

I spoke to DH last night as I really can' handle the thought of getting pregnant again just yet. We decided I'd go to the GP and ask for the Pill next week. I just can't wrap my head around anything right now. Yesterday I was bordering on a panic attack all day thinking about continuing to TTC.

But it's a good thing if you don't ovulate yet! You're not supposed to have sex while you're still bleeding anyway so just keep an eye on things and when it stops, your cycle will start and if you want to, you can start ttc.

I know it's really hard when it feels like it's still not over. But you're nearly there.

I was hoping to start TTC straight away but I guess I can't ovulate if I'm still bleeding.

I did take a HPT a few days ago and it was very nearly negative so I thought the bleeding would tail off.

snoopy for me it was 6d of heavy bleeding, 5d of light then a few days of spotting. I would only be worrying if it's still heavy or if you have any pain

snoopy
Sorry for your loss...
I bled for 3 days then not for 3 days then bled for 4 days, after that just spotting on and off.
I think your HCG needs to be back down

envious
I had my ERPC on the 11th November, and just got my +OPK on 9th December.
I also thought you were unlikely to ovulate, but I have, although thats sounds a long time, it is 18 days after I got a - HPT (testing to ensure bHCG gone) so I expect AF or hopefully BFP in about 10 days, 28 days from - HCG
I hope that makes sense

Are you planning to ttc straight away snoopy?

Snoopy, my consultant said bleeding would last between 5 and 10 days. She said to go back immediately if it became heavier or painful or if it was still going after 10-14 days.

Have you done a pregnancy test? I don't know if you'll ovulate while still bleeding to be honest- depends on your hormone levels I guess. Logic suggests maybe not because your uterine lining won't have got to cycle day 1 and started rebuilding. But I'm no expert.

My bleeding was about 5-6 days and then I had a bit if spotting after about 10 days. I'd had a really stressful and active day so maybe it could have been that.

Treaclpie I know what you mean, my line manager has been calling me asking what I want to do when I go back in six days. I want to tell him to fuck off and not bother me until I have a healthy baby in my arms I just couldn't care less about work anymore.

Guys please help. I had my erpc on the first. I didn't have any bleeding before then. The paperwork the nurse gave me said I shouldn't bleed for more than six days but this is day nine and theres red blood when I wipe. It has been tapering off to brown but now it's red again. What should I do? There's no pain or smell.

Also can I ovulate if I'm still bleeding or will it have to stop first?

Sorry if tmi

More moaning from me I'm afraid. I'm fed up!!! Of work and of ttc.
Gah :(

Sorry to hear about that stupid woman msj, as people say, she looks bad not you.
6dpo for me. Come on test day.

Oh MsJ what a nasty bitter woman she must be, to know what you are already going through then put you through even more shit! I agree with everyone else though she will come out of this looking like the nasty little cow she sounds like! I know that's not the point and you must be so fed up so sending hugs and positive thoughts x

envious I ha exactly the same timescales as haribo but didn't fall either. I couldn't fin any actual stats just opinions. Fx for you x

I'm definitely almost at the end of af I am just wiping very light brown (sorry!) the only thing is I've actually had pain today where my ovaries are, it's the first time in af I hve had pain and thought it's strange when it's almost finished.. Or is it? I don't know what's normal and what's not!

envious I had what felt like severe ovulation pains for a week but despite dtd during then and various symptoms (bloating, tingly nipples, nausea (still have)) b4 my period arrived 4 weeks exactly from the day of actual miscarriage. Like haribo I appreciate I've been lucky in the past, but have caught 1st cycle 3 times of trying so have to believe I didn't ovulate in the wtf cycle.

msj your colleague is stupid to complain - she's been in the wrong at every point!

hade fx in your 2ww

envious i couldn't find any stats on it either. I was sure i ovulated and DTD when i thought i was but didn't get lucky. Having caught first time with the baby we lost i was surprised. Maybe my body geared up to ovulate but didn't, i can't be sure i wasn't using OPK's. The time when i thought i ovulated was 3 weeks after i first started bleeding and i must have been right as my period arrived 2 weeks later. You could have ovulated as early as 2 weeks after though if your body treats the MC as a normal cycle. It's so hard to tell, if your strong enough not to test then i'd leave it until 6 weeks after MC if your period hasn't arrived. If your like me, i started testing 4 weeks after and period arrived at 5 weeks. Unfortunately it's just so unpredictable which did feel overwhelming at times.

I also got 'symptoms' - vivid dreams, heartburn, bloating, tiredness..
I really hope you've caught, fingers crossed.

Juipter what a bitch! I think karma will have a way of biting her in the ass. She looks like a fool targeting a woman who's been through such an awful time. I hope your okay xx

Plus MsJ I think you were pretty blameless for snapping at her in the first place. Her laziness left your poor mum waiting around for an hour and she didn't even apologise.

Yeah it was a pretty horrible shock. But as you say she is the one who looks bad. It just meant I had to explain the whole thing to my boss which I had tried to avoid doing. She said she wished I had told her about the mc which was fair enough. Just feel wrung out now.

Still having some yukky end-of-period stuff appearing when I wipe so I'm not quite ready to dtd yet. It will be hard enough to get into the mood I think, never mind about worrying about all that. Who knows if or when I will ovulate so I will just have to take my chances.