40+ and TTC? Join the club...

I could clearly see that that this was about parental behaviour and its effect on the child, not about a condition in any way. Don't feel bad Gum.

Moving on. jass if it's helping you to be here and post, then you should do it. There's plenty of time to move onto pregnancy threads. I also like to think that other people get lucky, allows me to think that I will too!

Not a lot going on here. DH prescribed antibiotics now as it's a chest infection. He's improving but we're well past the window. I've been exhausted too. So am writing this month off. Although a late attempt might be worthwhile - have said before that this was how my DS was conceived.

It's now a rainy Sunday here. Yesterday was a lovely spring day, and we have the luxury of nothing specific we have to do so it could have been a nice day to just hang out at the playground etc, but looks like we will be indoors. Hope everyone else is having a good weekend.

I think it was all about the narrow-mindedness of parents. i did not get any neg vibes about the child or his disgnosis. OK, a remidner from the big bro, lets keep it in mind and move on.

Oh dear! I wish I could edit my post. Should I have it taken down?

I certainly didn't wish to offend anyone, and I can see how it might upset other parents of children with ASD. I guess I was trying to illustrate the point that the parents were causing me grief but had no thanks for taking their child on a wonderful trip - it wasn't a dig at the fact that he has ASD.

Anyway...If it is too offensive, I suppose mumsnet will take it down? Clearly it has been reported. Hopefully I haven't offended anyone on this thread? I am sorry if I have.

Jass, I for one, am very happy to have you hear talking about your pregnancy.It is very good news to me, I like to hear it.

Happy 5th Birthday to Grizzer's DD. I do love how excited the little ones get on their special day. It is a highlight of parenting, I think.

Right, I am going to hide in my corner now, after being scolded. I feel a bit like a very naughty child. [shamefacedemiticon]

Hmmmm hello ladies, haven't had much chance for a catch up. Dd turned 5 today & we have had a fun filled day. She was so excited it was just lovely to see. I'm enjoying a glass of wine now & hoping I manage to stay awake to watch CSI at 9!!
Jass I love hearing about your pregnancy. Please don't feel you can't talk about it here. We are here to listen & support people through their journeys both good & bad & this is sounding more and more like a good one!
Gum I hear you rightly complaining about rude ungrateful parents rather than the child who is, of course, guided by the parent. We take 44 eleven year olds away to Berlin for 4 days as our trip & very rarely receive any thanks. Some people are just too precious & shouldn't send their children on trips if they don't want them to learn & grow. Hope you're ok xx

Gum,so ready to grab your 10 if it makes you feel any better. I have gained a couple myself, too. What a day! I really do not get parents who think 16yo have not googled lots of intersting images,ceben if their parents tell them it is "disgusting". Who the hell teaches kids nowadays that naked bodies are disgusting? What about sexual ed at school, do these parents allow the kids go there?

Ladies, tell me if I an talking too much of pg here, I will try to drag myself to pg after mc forum or sth if that is the case. I haven't done it as I feel I would freak out everyone there if I owned up to how many mcs I have had! From the other side, if I would only count those where at least a sac formed I only have 4. The rest were chems..... But I feel uncomfortable elsewhere and looking at ante-natals threads I really do not see I could be part of those. I only check things like "is everyone else having cramping around 7w", riduclously, as if I did not know it is very common. Well, I have it, pretty bad, cramping occasionally, not spotting or anything. This is a good sign, for those who like their daily positive update. But tell me if it is too much.

I am now considering not going to doctors before I am back in Estonia for easter, i.e close to 11 weeks. I got an app here but they sent a mail to move the time, and I have fixed meeting times at work that time I cannot change (we need a quorum). In Estonia I do not have to make appointments 3 weeks in advance and then get them changed and then go there and still wait 3 hours sometimes before I get seen, surrounded by huuuuuge bellies and fresh babies:-) My proposed appointment is anyway only three days before we leave for easter. and even if it would be bad news then I would cope better, as they will swiftly solve the issue, and my daughter is coming close to her due date, so plenty of happiness around anyway. Of course all this still applies if I will not bleed before that, but a month ago it seemed preposterous I might stay pg for a whole month. but I have been pg knowingly now for month and 2 days! I am in denial I guess in some way, but normal pg women who are not spotting do not do docs all the time, do they:-))

Hi everyone. I am fine,thanks for asking, but yesterday was a tough day. I was irritable from the moment I awoke. It all makes sense now as AF arrived last night. So, 15 days past O pain, which probably means I ovulated the day after the O pain. Which makes sense, AF arriving 14 dpo. I was trying to play it cool by not temping, but all it does is causes confusion and stupid mindless hope that I might actually get pregnant!

I still have the same desire (for a THB) and despite knowing that my case is pretty well hopeless, I am not able to completely give up hope. I suppose as long as I keep getting AF (pretty regularly) I still have a tiny glimmer of hope. Anyway, I am going to take red clover isoflavones this month - the same way as you do with Soy. I am guessing all isoflavones are equal? But that's just a guess and I will need to consult Dr google. I really have nothing to lose as I am pretty sure my estrogen is low. I will finally catch up with my female Doc in a week or so, and may ask her to check my hormone levels. I guess it can't hurt.

Gosh, yesterday was a tough day! I am a high school teacher and I had a full 6 period day (no breaks) - and on a Friday, no less. I started the day with double year 7's. Oh boy! This is the first year that western Australia has had year 7's in High school. It's been a bit of a learning curve. They are so young, and so gosh-darn-it needy! I am used to students who are independent. There is far too much mothering required. I do enough of it at home. So, needless to say, it was a tough gig whilst feeling cranking and pre-menstrual! But the worst was a complaint from a parent whose son we took on the arts festival trip last week. She was upset that we took the students to an art gallery that had nudity in the paintings (I know, I know, how excruciatingly narrow-minded).These students were all 16,17 and 18 years old. The students were warned that they may find some images confronting, and they did not have to go upstairs, into a separate gallery, to view the paintings. However, their son did, and they are upset that the teachers didn't stop him from viewing the images! Argh! But if that isn't bad enough, the student in question asked me,"why did you take us to see disgusting things?" My response was, "I didn't find it disgusting, and I don't think it hurts to broaden student's horizons, that's the whole point of the trip". The upset parent said that I have "undermined" the student's values. But she has it completely wrong, I never once said his (and his parent's) weird, narrow, based on their Christian ideals, views were narrow (despite thinking it). I was very annoyed by it,and have made it clear to my head of learning area. The stupid mother and child didn't even thank me or my colleagues for taking their highly strung, anxious son (he has aspergers) on a 4 day trip to see some amazing plays, installations and art! We looked after 42 kids, 24/7 for 4 days and 3 nights, and that's the thanks we get.

But enough about that!

Jass, I am so pleased that things are progressing for you. It really is wonderful.

It is Saturday morning here and the sun is shining brightly. I am planning on a double class at the gym (I haven't been for a while what with being away and feeling unwell). However I got a lovely surprise when I got on the scales and have lost a couple more kilos. I felt for sure the scales weren't working as I was so surprised because I haven't really been trying very hard this past two weeks. I must have donated them to Jass. Actually, Jass, how about I send my other 10 kilos I don't need over to you whilst you add them on while growing your baby? Sounds like a deal to me

I hope you all have a lovely weekend too. What's everyone else up to?

I am planning a bit of thrift store shopping after the gym. Happy days!

jass that sounds very promising!

gum so sorry to hear the roller coaster for you. How are you?

jass every day I look on here hoping things are still progressing. So pleased to read your update.

gum how are you?

LH is not fixed but has an upper limit, 14, for some reason. Pls do not worry, indeed it can just be a longer cycle.

I am otherwise doing oK, i.e. I still havenot seen a drop of blood or bfown stain anywhere, my breasts are occasionally tender and I have a major bloat, but the bloat may be because I am eating like crazy. I am home with my sick 5yo son and my fridge and cupboards get methodically lowded inside me. Even if i do not know whether this baby has a heartbeat it certainly has a huge appetite. I tend to overeat when I have time to do so and with no sports for more or less 2 weeksnow I have already gained 2 kg and hoping binge eating is not bad for baby.

Cloud you were right, temperature up this morning, yay! Of course ovulating on cd14 of a 24 day cycle is bad news, isn't it? Doesn't leave much time for implantation, is the luteal phase length fixed ie could my cycle be a bit longer this time? I need to get a life, will start posting the numbers straight from the thermometer soon.

How are you today, gum? Calm and hopeful everyone (especially JassS) and don't forget the supplements!

I know nothing of temping, but I think like with everything else, it cannot be exact science. Lh needs to go up to the level where you release egg, some women get really dark opks, some get very light but both ovulate. My last tahenhome baby was conceived in a cycle when I had for one day a line on opk which was half the strength of the control. And gone next day. I also had dtd last time that cycle 48 h before that pitiful line, so was quite astonished that I got pg. I travelled away from the sperm source and was quite sure our last attwmpt before me taking the plane was far too early.

Yes, Reni, I wonder whether it did. Estrogen and progesteron, as I understand, are in balance. If one is low, the other one is low quite often as well, because they work in balance. So it is poss that boosting estrogen did in itself boost progesterone, too. I have been tested for progesterone and found that I managed to ovulate even when my proge level day 21ish remained below 10. But maybe it was not enough to sustain pg. On the other hand, I have been trying eith proge supplementation from ovulation, and achieved several bfps that way, non-sticking kind all of them.

Cloud or anyone in the know, if the temperature does not rise, that means definitely no ovulation that month, right? +opk=poss ov, temp up=def ov?

Thanks, JassS. Maybe lack of estrogen early in the cycle was what stopped you keeping the pregs in the past? Somebody really ought to study this in a well controlled trial.

Gum, so sorry about the dashed hopes......

Reni, you are so right soy is mostly anecdotal evidence. That is why I have also not kept the links to forums I have browsed, sorry Fireflies, if you google pregnant or ttc w soy isoflavones or successful pg over 40 and these things, they come up and Iread them, but they are no way scientific evidence. I was lured by the fact that it was quite common according to women testifying to try for long time and then get pg first or second attempt with soy. I also hesitated rather long, but sicne I kept losing my pregnacies, knew I have hormonal imbalancees, have tried w agnus castus vitamine B etc and still lost my pregnancies, I felt nothing to lose. Decided to try max 2 cycles with them. Fell on first. Which, as I stress, could with me have happened anyway. Did it help me to avoid 21DPo beta dip? I do not know really. But something did. After 14 or so times when it happened more or less the same way always, unless the loss was already earlier chem. I have yet to see the heartbeat of course, so maybe I still will lose it, it is and remains a high possibility.

Other people here have not my precise picture, so as I said, everybody to their own and I do not want to start a soy craze.

And we dtd at 6, 8, 10, 11, 13 so was very pleased with our efforts, alas to no avail.

I have discovered a new level of dashed hopes; seems I did not ovulate this month . A new thing to worry about every month now! The signs were so good, +opk for 2 days, ewcm, ovulation pain (ha! if only). CD 14 now, temps still down and normally ov 11-12. I can now sulk until the end of af, giving me 15 days of feeling down this month. Rant over.

reni I've never had ov pain before but last month I did, and also wondered whether I had just become super aware and noticed it when I wouldn't have done before. Nothing this month, but I'm sceptical that I have ovulated at all this time. Plus it's now CD16 and there's been no DTD for a week as DH has been ill with a chest infection and is coughing & wheezing. So I am pretty much writing off this month, although I might try for a late go in the spirit of optimism, as DS was conceived when technically it should have been way too late in the cycle.

Has anyone found that when they've been stressed their ovulation is delayed? Just wondering about that as I had a huge amount of work to do early this cycle and it's barely left me time or energy for anything else.

Gum Hmm about the FR. Seems odd that the other test and all symptoms are pointing the opposite way. Let's hope you get resolution of some kind anyway soon.

Oh sorry about the bfn, gum, only just registered. Do you always get ov pain? I get it now I am ttc, I wonder if I just ignored it before.

I cross-posted with a couple of you. Sorry about the BFN Gum. Here's hoping it's wrong.

Chewy oh my. Your little one is up till 11pm? Although sounds much like yours energy wise (but a bit less balletic), 10pm or 1030pm seems to be the limit, though those nights usually see me crawling into bed at 1am as I've fallen asleep with him on the floor. Grim. Yes, when exactly are you supposed to get on with the housework!

So sorry about AF. It's not fair.

JassS well you are firing me up a bit about SI. Would you mind linking to the forum you found please? It's all sounding very good for you. I am also somewhat in awe by the knowledge you have about TTC and pregnancy.

Battery running low on laptop and it's bedtime now. Will be attempting to nonchalantly buy some FRER's tomorrow if no AF.

Night all.

I just cannot find anything other than anecdotal evidence about the benefit of soy for conception. There appears to be precious little research into it in premenopausal women. The little there is is very inconclusive. The only proven point seems it increases cycle length by an average of a day. Other than that, can't find benefits, but plenty of negatives, lowering fertility by preventing ovulation as well as possibly messing up implantation. Proceed with a heck of a lot of caution unless you are sure that both your estrogen levels are low and a slightly longer cycle will help you.

I have seen the thread dedicated to it, but again, anecdotal stuff, nobody seems to have studied it. Lovely for the pregnancies achieved on isoflavones, but one might argue they happened regardless of or even despite the soy.

Anybody know more? Any studies? Truly interested, would be thrilled to be wrong and have stumbled across something that might help.

jass, I love your attitude. It does all sound very good. I am now thinking I might take some soy once AF turns up.

I am 14 dpo (or at least 14 days post O pain - I have no real idea) and still no AF, no spotting. But the FR test was BFN. I think the super faint line was just a tease. However, I have been feeling exhausted in the evenings, have had that taste in my mouth and breasts are a wee bit tender. But, if the test says BFN, I have to accept that and move on. I guess the truth will out eventually: Af or perhaps a bouncing babe in 36 weeks time

My tiredness may be due to poisoning myself with gluten while I was away. I thought a little bit wouldn't hurt, but it appears to have made me feel a bit sick, had tummy upset ever since, and I have no idea how long it will be until I feel better.

Grizzer and Fireflies, I hope you both get the big BFP this time.

I am seeing my acupuncture lady today, hopefully she will help me feel a bit better.

Calm and hopeful mothers
Love it!