How do you manage the monthly disappointment?

Hi Portlypenguin I know exactly how you feel. We've been trying for number 2 for 19 cycles now and everyone who was pg with their first at same time as me or after me has gone on to have a second & some even a third! Most recently a colleague pg with second, first has only just turned 2 & she got pg as soon as they started trying.

It's hard wanting something so badly and for so long and seeing everyone else get it so easily. It's hard not to be a bit jealous.

hi ladies reading your post has helped me a little but unfortunately I cannot even get angry if AF shows up because it's been 4 months off BC and nothing and being told just sit and observe nothing doing given it's only 4 months but trouble is I'm going to be 40 in 3 months so looks like no good news in sight. really bumbed out.

wish i could go into hiding especially since at work everyone is pregnant even the guys have wives that are pregnant and they are just as chatty about it. i could just scream.

I'm with you on that Portlypenguin I'm on DPO7 today & AF due to arrive Saturday. The 19th try! Feeling down today

I'm with you on that Skiingcat my body likes to play tricks on me too & then I get hit by the heavy bleed!

We've been TTC our second for 19 months & I know I'm very lucky to have DD who is almost 4. Facebook has been awful everyone who's had a first around same time as me & after me have gone on to have second & 2 pregnant with their third. If I do get pregnant I'm not announcing it on Facebook.

Two of my friends are pregnant & their firs DC's are 18 months & 2 years younger than & I'm finding it a bit hard to swallow them getting pregnant again so easily struggling!

It sounds like he is completely ignorant Absy and not worth thinking about his stupid remark - easier said than done I know!

Hope everything goes well with the fertility specialist.

I take comfort in the fact that he's probably completely ignorant on this subject, otherwise he wouldn't make such a ridiculous remark. I wouldn't wish fertility issues on anyone, it's hideous, but I kind of hope he has a taste of this one day. We had had such a rough week, my period arrived and we're seeing the fertility specialist next week. We had been discussing treatment options (whether we should consider IUI or go straight to IVF, which I'm nervous about) and I had been researching what is actually involved in having IVF (including things like endometrial scratching, hormone treatments and so on) so to have some insensitive twat say it's really easy to fall pregnant seriously pissed me off.

I'm with you all. Ttc for first time and there are babies everywhere I go. I've signed off Facebook as its babies babies babies. No one tells you about this part of ttc. My body likes to play tricks on me that make me think maybe just maybe I'm pregnant. It doesn't help when my husband asks do you feel pregnant yet..he now knows not to ask that question... meanwhile I'll just spend time with my furbaby.

I know what you mean ValerieTheVodkaFairy our DD was unplanned so I was 6 weeks along before I tested. My boobs were sore as they always are before AF due & thought that I couldn't be pg because if it was a pregnancy symptom they wouldn't have been sore so early on, I didn't think you could get symptoms for a few weeks. I had implantation bleeding but I just thought it was start if AF but I didn't get the usual heavy bleed.

I'm currently on DPO 6 I think I'm the same & I'd need something completely different to make me think I'm pregnant, although that doesn't stop me symptom spotting!

Some people are so insensitive Absy I'm not surprised he nearly got slapped!

A friend of hours nearly got slapped yesterday. He's quite socially inept at the best of times, and now he seems OBSESSED with asking us every time we see him "so when are you two having kids?" Yesterday he just wouldn't drop the topic, even after we asked him to, and then said "well [other friends] got married in December and she's pregnant. Why aren't you pregnant? It's really easy, you have sex". Well of course, that's where we were going wrong. We thought you got pregnant by jumping on pogo sticks. I'm still angry at him

So sorry about your mc patience. I had a chemical a few months ago, and was surprised at how terrible I felt about it. Though I'm trying to take a positive from it, that DH and I are working to some extent

AF due any day now. Sore boobs but no symptoms of anything. Don't feel pregnant, pretty sure I'm not.

I always give up hope at about 9dpo, because I feel that I should know by then. I was reading the 'pregnancy symptoms' thread in discussion of the day, and so many women know they are pregnant before AF is even due, if not a few days after conception! So I suppose I'm expecting a radically different feeling, a bolt out of the blue that will make that month feel different.

But then, DD was unplanned and I didn't find out I was pregnant until quite a few weeks after missed AF and I don't remember feeling any different then until I started boking every half hour, six weeks in

I'm currently on DPO4 of cycle 19, AF should be due next Sat if it arrives. Wish I could think about something else but it's always at the back of my mind.

Posted that previous one by mistake stupid phone!

I'm currently on DPO4 of cycle 19, AF should be due next Sat if it arrives. Wish I could think about something else but it's always at the bank of my m

Cycle #5 is out for me now. Got AF today, over a week late so hopes were built up.

We got a bfp in cycle 2 but had early mc :(

Although I haven't been trying that long relative to some I still find it destroys my soul a little each month. Maybe because I am 37 this year and it's been my first chance to ttc (at least I have hope now).

It's tough. I am going to drink lots of wine this weekend!

Is great to read this thread and realise I am normal! Conceived in six cycles last year but then lost or baby boy at 22 weeks in November and am now waiting for my period which is due this weekend and know I am not pregnant again. Each month breaks my heart a little, I am lucky that hubby is on the same page and we are doing everything at the right time and using the clear blue ovulation tests so I just don't know why it's not working. Have made an appointment to talk to the doc, I an worried something is not working after losing or boy and the operation after to remove my placenta....

Un mn hugs, Absy. That's one of the things that I don't like about TTC: it makes me feel a little bitter. Only with some people- I have friends/family who are pregnant at the minute and I'm delighted for them. But there are two people in particular who I am not fond of anyway, and they moan so much about their pregnancies, it does set my teeth on edge a bit.

I feel sad and achy today. I don't know why, I suppose it's because AF is due in the next few days, and I have no symptoms of anything. So that's me out this month, as I expected. My DD was talking today about how much she'd love a baby sister- she really does love babies, and is brilliant with tinies, so much patience considering she's only little herself.

How do we manage? Badly mostly. We've been TTC for nearly two years now. Some months are fine; I kind of "feel" that I'm not pregnant, and manage to make peace with it before, and other months not so much. It hasn't gotten easier with time. In fact, now I'm receiving treatment (clomid), the stakes seem higher and it's even more disappointing.

The other issue is - freaking friends and acquaintances who are pregnant and have kids, and EVEN WORSE those insensitive sods (mostly single! So YAH BOO SUCKS TO YOU you can't even manage a relationship so shut up) who ask all the time why I'm not pregnant yet. Asking them why they're still single, or telling them that we're waiting until they have a significant other so they can provide free baby sitting 1. help deflects the question some what, though 2. it does make me sound like a complete bitch (the above monologue about them sucking at relationships only happens in my head though - I don't say it to their face. I'm not that mean)

DH kind of disappears every time AF arrives; he gets really upset and it breaks my heart. I get really upset for a day/a couple of days, frantically google both of our medical conditions, success rates, treatment options and so on, and periodically buy something for the baby for when it arrives. I wish it would just happen already, you know? Neither of us have a condition (me mild PCOS, him issues with morphology) that means that there's no chance. The doctors say we have a good prognosis which is partly why (that and some rather incompetent medical professionals) we're only starting on fertility treatments now. It is possible for us to have a kid naturally, it just hasn't happened.

What is it you are getting tested for icy- is it just the bloods you mentioned earlier? Glad the acupuncture went well- I hear great things about it.

I also hear great things about wine, which I am going to crack on with once AF inevitably shows