New balls please! The BESH are hanging out the cunt bunting for Wombledon and saddling up for the Tour de France!

Rain Mauritius!!!! Lucky you, I've never been but heard amazing things...

Fab Hello there! I got pg straight after my laparoscopy and I believe Fankle did too, as well as another lady I know through MN. My gyno in the UK said that it's not rare at all so everything crossed for you!

Cherry I am also all over the zen walking, yoga and meditation. I do sometimes worry that I could be putting too much effort on the more complicated postures, or walking too fast, which could (mainly in my paranoia infested world) be counterproductive for TTC/implantation etc... Please tell me to get a grip! What do you think?

Last night in Europe for me hags. Back to crazy Africa tomorrow. I am not particularly looking forward to starting RMC testing etc but at least I feel positive and energised. I have had a chat with myself and decided I won't let TTC take over my life anymore! (HA! See how long this lasts...Worth a try though!).

Hope everyone is having a lufly week end!

No no, not killed, just had limited MN time this week bloody job getting in the way

fab you have been really spoilt (which is obviously well deserved) - sounds like TWH did a sterling job! Am quite envious!
Will be flinging halibuts if hope at you for a post lap ironidiff - is an ECG just being hooked up with those sticky nipple pasty things?

chezza here's hoping your woo lady has left the infant gate wide open for lots of barbers to escape through. Will have to ask my needle woman about that!

I'm in a happy place at the mo - over the next 6 weeks I will only be at work for 2.5 of them as we've got TWO amazing and unbaby friendly holidays (in your FACE people with kids!). Am considering not bothering ttc next cycle (droid due on about weds) so I can make the absolute most of Mauritius guilt free. Haven't had to use contraceptives for so long, not sure I remember how to use them!

Hope everyone is good this weekend

Holy crap - I killed the Fred

Hello Hags! Well here I am, busy learning my new age - I turned 42 on Tuesday - how the hell did that happen?? I'm only 32 surely? TWH outdid himself in the thought and effort he went to creating one of the best birthdays I've ever had . It culminated in going to the Lecture Rooms at Sketch (London innit) which was truly wonderful - I just couldn't fault it - what a lucky hag I am

I also had my gynae appointment this morning so am now on the list to have an exploratory laparoscopy in the next 8-12 weeks. In my infinite wisdom I told them that I'd had chest pain in the last year so now I've got to have an ECG before the op - it's best to be safe than sorry but it is still a pain in the arse. Hey ho. I'm feeling positive about it though - I'm actually doing something rather than hanging about. And you never know, it might help with a surprise instadiff after the op?? Ever hopeful

Hope all is good with you gorgeous women and you're enjoying the weather?

Euro, how are you doing? How are the crazy hormones treating you?

Infant gate, hey - fingers crossed it's opened it up :-)

It's nice when our bodies behave Erica, must be a mahoosive relief to feel ready to go when the mood takes you.

Barking I'm another that doesn't hold with the no exercise TTC thing. I'll be having some time off over the IVF to keep stress levels down but you sure as hell won't find me on the sofa or worse still in bed for three weeks like some people seem to and the FC hinted I might want to try don't get me wrong, I won't be running any marathons but going stir crazy and feeling like a massive lardy arse doesn't seem like the healthiest way forward to me.

All my yoga and woo energy stuff says moving and stretching is a good thing to keep meridians flowing and chakras balanced so I'm intending a zen walking, yoga and meditation fest I think with plenty of woo needles and healthy eating thrown in for our bash. Not to mention a healthy dose of BESH positive vibes from you brilliant hags.

Totally forget to tell you one of the points my woo needles lady treated the other day was the 'infant gate' to aid conception which I thought was pretty lovely.

Well jel of all you hags in gorgeous Spain. Cheers on the gin front though, that I can join you in.

We are sitting in candlelight to commemorate the First World War. MN maybe not totally in the spirit but needs must!

Blue Absolutely yes to gin! I've decided this Body needs some positive encouragement and a reward system and she's getting it!!

Barking I can't believe someone told you 'if you are not willing to give up running, you don't want a baby badly enough'. One thing is to make gentle suggestions, another one to to make you feel bad for having a fucking healthy habit. I am so fed up with this bullshit. RAGE!

Oh and to Erica's Body "well done darlin, good on you - have some gin" (bodies like gin too right?)

You know, really I'm sure there is a good reason for these recommendations but fuck people who tell you not to run! Man how I wish I coped with stress like that rather that eating ...

Still it's really shitty that people can be so firm on what you can and can't do. What about all those bloody running/drunk/fat/stressed instadiffers? Bastards.

By the way ... I have PMT. Can you tell???

Lazy posting by the pool in the campsite as the sun is making things difficult, so apologies for not knowing who I'm replying to!

Exercise - I was essentially told by my first acupuncturist that if I wasn't prepared to stop running I clearly didn't want to get pg that badly. I cried and never went back, fell running is my stress release and I didn't see how being more stressed and less fit would help ttc. Anyhoo, an injury in a race back in January sorted that dilemma out as I haven't been able to run since.... My extensive googling and reading woo books has told me that swimming, cycling and walking are good, high intensity/high impact is bad.I don't think their 'cycling' was beasting yourself up big hills though. When I start TTC again I'll continue on the bike but just not push myself.

On the sex life thing - we got into a rut where I wouldn't be so interested after shag week as I was exhausted and we didn't 'have' to, leaving DCW feeling like I only wanted him for his swimmers, so we had to make sure we were making time for 'us' not just spending all our energy on project get pg.

Erica I'm in sunny Spain now! Weather in France wasn't so good so we drive south and it's lovely here . Not been up any mountains rain but I did a great 65km ride yesterday, walked the dog round the lake today and plan to cycle to the coast on Wednesday .

No WiFi in the tent here so not online so much!

Hags, AF arrived today, bang on 27 days after the second D&C.

I am not 100% sure I am ready to get back on the TTC horse but it's nice that Body is for once doing what she's meant to be doing and on time too! (did you hear that, Body?? It's called positive encouragement!).

Hope everyone is having a good Monday, climbing some more mountains and/or shopping at Anne Summers!

Fanks hags, having a few days away and nearly forgotten the whole sorry affair. I'll sort myself out then right? Damn right. Gin anyone? Cheers Vix Happy burfday Fab.

I did climb mountains big hills today Rain too bloody tired for the sechsing now though. Well impressed with your adventurousness and you Erica. Our last couple of years of woes have put a bit of a kibosh on the between the sheets activity. Must try harder...

Nothing ventured nothing gained....

Ha, Rain - this is not the place to be shy :-)

Maybe latex and ball gags are the way forward ??

Erica - yeah, I've been thinking it was just me too so thanks for joining me in the misery that is ttc sex

Blue & Rain - thanks for sharing sexy times issues! I was starting to think we were the only ones! Our sex life started to go downhill around 18 months in (so nearly 18 months ago) and even though we've had periods when it seemed that things were improving, it has never really been the same. Rain You may be onto something by taking a trip to Ann Summers. A bit of filth and fun to get us out of the TTC depressing routine!

Blue I laughed at 'it just looks like it's happy I pissed on it'!

Heading back to Africa next week. Had the best time and it's made us decide we want to move back to Europe again within 1-2 years. On the other hand, I am really looking forward going back, sleeping on my own bed, seeing my cats etc and hanging out with child-free friends

Oh god, not that my sex life is a) of any interest to any of you or b) something to censor but in case anyone's now thinking I'm in to latex, ball gags and strap ons, I should clarify that the AS stuff was pretty tame!

All this sunshine is obviously keeping us all occupied outdoors and away from MN! How very dare we allow the BESH to lose our número uno footing!

Welcome vix - I concur with the others, you're in! Although I have to question your choice of bloody insta differ Johanssen as your lez crush. . As for Bowie, for the most part no but if we're talking Labyrinth era then definitely YES. I realise this possibly makes me a bit odd.
There's an awful lot of waiting involved in unexplained infertility, it's just a matter of waiting the proscribed amount of time before anyone will do anything. Tres annoying!

chezza outraged on your behalf, what a fucking shitshow. I'm a bit like you in not being able to react as I'd like to imagine I would in stressful/emotional situations like that. I wish one of us could have been with you to give those numpties the ear bashing they deserve.

erica where else will your grand tour take you? Quite envious of your jet setting!

fab got anything nice other than the wine obvs planned for your birthday?

blue I hear ya on the sex life ishoos. We had a similar spell around 18 months in. Didn't do anything particular to fix it - I got diffed, had the MC so a 3 month or so 'break' and then things were sort of just back to normal. Hoping we don't hit the same this go round. So much pressure involved! I did do an Anne Summers shop a few months back actually - not sure if that's going to help long term but it has at least made sex more about fun than baybee-making, at least some of the time anyway.

Hope everyone's having a good weekend. Barking have you climbed any more mountains?

hate when our thread falls off the first page, it's makes me all competitive.

Erica - yay for Barcelona! And thanks so much for the ovulation/piss sticks info, that really helped. I've decided to try the ovacue I think. I really really really hate waking up then having to try not to pee so I don't have to hang around in the bathroom waiting for that idiotic smiley face (I realise it's happy I've ovulated but it just looks like it's happy I pissed on it) when I want to be asleep. Appearently the ovacue takes salvia (and sometimes. 'Vagjnal') readings. It's expensive but if I have to poa another motherfuckings I'm going to go mental (in the violent rather than nicely insane way) Rain while I would dearly love to just shag and have no monitoring ttc has completely destroyed our sex life, it's just in a real mess and while the ttc break got things back on track, starting again has sent us completely backward (we managed 1x this month and only because I decided I wasn't ovulating which made us both actually want to)

Cherry - gah! For stupid medical professionals who give no thought to the fact that this is actually your life and not just a training environment. I admire your zen though

Fab, happy birthday for this week, much wine (and gin) drinking to you

Welcome vix - I lurked for ages before joining too

'Allo 'allo!

Barking Barcelona is gorgeous and the weather is amazing right now. However, we did have a couple of storms last week. They only last a couple of hours, so they don't disturb any outdoors-ey plans too much. That said, my outdoors-ey plans consist mainly on walking around the city and going to the beach.

I've had exactly the same thoughts re exercising while TTC. The thing is, exercising really de-stresses me. These days I do more power yoga and walking and less spinning and mental circuit classes but I am starting to doubt it has any real impact. I can't see how sitting on the sofa, biting your nails and reading everything that has ever been written about TTC on the internet is 'more relaxing' than going for a long walk or swim. That said, I have never done any extreme sports, so not sure about those.

Cherry Gaaaaaaahhhhh! Feel very pissed off on your behalf. Glad you are feeling better now though. Whatevs! You got your donor, exciting times ahead!!

Thanks everyone for you kind words about my TTC break! It does feel empowering! I am pretty sure that I am not emotionally fit to embark on TTC menkul yet and as someone said...what's a couple of months, considering it's going to be 3 years since we first started?

Welcome Vic!

Cava for everyone!!!

Thanks for the welcome guys. Well I suppose there's not much else to do than make the most of the break and greet the start of the weekend with a large gin...

Welcome on board Vix, sounds like you've had your fair share of ttc woes so you're in . Sorry to hear you're at a stop again - it's so bloody annoying isn't it. You can join me in the loitering, twiddling fingers and whistling aimlessly while waiting gang.

Chez, have a big catch of seafood of solace - what an absolutely shit experience. Seriously which fucking eejit thought it was a good idea to put a menopause unit in the middle of maternity? Genius - not. I've got the rage on your behalf. Grrrrr. And having waited all those months for you not even to see the top monkey is a bit bloody insulting, no? Hurrah for woo needles lady for sorting you out though. Think calm happy thoughts for impending ivf instead. Do you have any idea on a start date yet?

Barking yes I've been told that too about the exercise which is why I've ended up being a lazy bitch and not working my arse off properly. Continue to enjoy what you're doing I reckon - your plan sounds good. And tell the others to stop showing off and live a little hard work then breaks sounds perfect!

rain/fankle/cherry I like that you're impressed by my fitness, but sadly, amongst my friends, I am very much the unfit one. There is no-one here anywhere near my beginner level so I have to ride on my own or they get cold bored waiting for me! They all went out and did 100km of riding and almost 4,000m of ascent yesterday, then went out again today in search of more big hills. I did 30km very slowly yesterday with only 1,000m of ascent and today I lay by a lake.....
Nice work on the 20 miles cherry, I'm training towards a 26 mile walk (some people run it but I'm not, when I entered I was pg so went for the walking category not that I've started running again anyway) in September. Not done that distance in one go yet.
I'm currently reading a 'woo' book that says too much exercise puts undue stress on the body and doesn't leave it with enough energy to conceive, as we need less stress and more energy for conception the older we get. But I'm on a TTC break until we've investigated all the mc crap so the woo book can fuxk off until I'm ready to make my womb a comfy abode and my body a welcoming temple again. In the meantime I intend to get fit and have fun and buy a shiny new bike.

Ooh 'ello Foxy welcome to the BESH fred ready for the September cluster diff
Sorry to hear your TTC woes. Can't say I share your crushes on the diffed Miss Scarlett or the shifty Bowie but each to their own! You've obviously done your homework come on in.

Any other lurkers can come out from behind the bushes too

Wow Cherry, that sounds like a heap of crap. But I also find a bit of woo helps the rage to disappear.

OK so I've been lurking for a while but this week I need to vent, so thought I'd pipe up at last. Here's my beshtionnaire...

1. Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')
   Ooh, Millers with tonic and a dash of lime please.

2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?
   I live with a silver fox so I have to say gold digger...

3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
   a) weewee
   b) poopoo
   c) foofoo
   d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.
   Er, c.

4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
   a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
   b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.
   The word babydust makes me feel sick on so many levels it would have to be a).

5. Is R2D2:
   a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
   b) the source of all evil.
   B.

6. Number of pets?
   Zilch

7. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?
   I've always thought there's something about David Bowie.

8. Lesbian crush?
   Scarlett Johansson

9. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
   a) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
   b) Over 100 quid
   c) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks

I'm a bit of a defeatist when it comes to POAS so have kicked that habit but I've bought a fair few sticks in my time.

10. Which of these sentences is appalling:
    a) Off to see the consultant today!!! So excited!!!!!
    b) Gud luck hun sprinkling babydust for ya lol xxx
    c) both of the above
    C.

11. How barren are you?
    a) childless and TTC for at least one year
    b) one child and TTC #2 for at least two years
    c) I've been trying for 2 cycles and the wait is driving me mad!

So I'm 36 and have been trying for #1 for over 3 years now with a diagnosis of unexplained fertility. 2 attempts at medicated iui have failed and I was about to start round 3 but this week dildocam revealed what the nurse thinks could be a fibroid so everything is on hold whilst they take a closer look.

I'm sick of another obstacle getting in the way but timings mean I could be good to resume treatment and join the impending clusterdiff due for the BESH in September, if you'll have me???

Fab have some of my ragey-ness to aim at your masticating fellow commuters. I am done with it and letting it go Rain. How liberated are we?

Just for the record I walked 20 miles on Saturday - not in Barking's league but maybe not too shabby either