New balls please! The BESH are hanging out the cunt bunting for Wombledon and saddling up for the Tour de France!

Hope you doing ok Erica x

And congrats bugs! Wow, time flies.

Can I be lazy and get someone to tell me what this gluten free fertility diet is? Am gonna try to be healthier - what should I be doing?

BFN caught me today. Sad times (i.e. crying and swearing like a sailor times).

I found this article quite helpful though, maybe some of you will do too! infertility.about.com/od/infertilitytesting/a/When-The-Pregnancy-Test-Is-Negative.htm

Well done Bugs!!!

And inspiration and source of hope for the BESH!

Had a few nips of damson gin, slow gin, a blood orange and a strawberry liqueur, some white port and a snifter of red wine just to be on the safe side in Bug's honour last night with a generous selection of cheeses and breads from a day at the local food festival. We gorged and am now feeling a touch lethargic! But it was gooood

AMAZING news!!!!!
Go bugs!!!!

As I'm neither diffed nor seemingly capable of natural diffment and am currently not in my fertile zone I shall join Chez in raising a glass of gin and savouring it's sweet flavour and maybe having a few more to wet the Eshlet's head with! Such wonderful news - it doesn't seem that long ago that Bugs was in the ivf fear zone that you're going through now Chez and look where she is now

Yay bugs amazing news!!!!

Whoop whoop! it's looking a little dusty in here. Is that some in my eye? Well laid Bugs! Anyone join me in a sniff of gin to celebrate?

Thanks for the updates Fankle

Bugs has laid a pink one!!

Dropping in to say that Bugs is in labour! She was at it all all day yesterday, bless her, but Buglet will hopefully arrive by lunchtime. 3 weeks early too! There's practically been a live birth update on the PESH fred.

what ifs are par for the course and to be fair, what if it works?! What if you get the hard won win you SO deserve?

Yesterday I saw the founder and former member of my local infertility support group, who's about to drop her 6th attempt icsi IVF twins. I hadn't seen her since the last meeting I attended in April, when she had to come in to hand over all the official stuff so others could keep the support group going (the rules are if you get diffed you bow out). I can't help but think that her handing over some of that stuff to me (whilst 12 weeks pregnant) was some kind of woo gesture which may have helped me get diffed that month, like a small but seismic hint to the universe

I think I need a slap. Didn't get much sleep last night and had very bizarre dreams. Blaming that for my airy fairyness this morning. That and giddiness over Bugs.

Chezza stay positive girl

Troo troo Barking we can't help ourselves though can we - and add extra just incase! Bio available through food has to be the best way in the end, if only there was a print out at the end of the day to say what we clocked. I come back to exhibit A though, smug instadiffer.... How many vits did she take?!

Oh hags, the brain is truly a weird thing isn't it? I swing from totally cool about all of this to total menkul basket case. Woken up stressed Eric this morning in a plague of the what ifs. somebody slap me please!

I think 'supplements' are just that. If you have a great diet you shouldn't need them hasn't stopped me spending a fortune on miracle pills and taking so many I rattle.
Frolic acid - yep, anything consultant advised - probably. Anything else is just there to boost what you could be getting through food.

Glad the woo is helping .

Happy weekend everyone!!!

Ooh, love a good new cookbook Effin
I've been wondering if we really need to take extra vits and mins or whether getting nutrition from food is the best way forward. Especially iron? I'm super careful about what I eat, at least 8+ portions of fruit and veg a day, whole food, gluten free, no caffeine, low alcofrol, lean protein with every meal. I'm thinking I might just go for a simple frolic acid and have done. Any opinions?

Glad you're feeling better today Barking, despite the imminent visit. Totally understandable to feel resentful, just remember we're all fighting our own battles.

My woo CD is super cheesy but I've decided to stop giggling go with it and despite all I think it's doing the trick. Keeping the shizz together these last couple of days at any rate, which is always good.

He tells his dad it's a boy not a bit .

eff the cookbook sounds good.
cherry I've had problems with vitamins before, had to remember to eat them after food and never on an empty stomach.

Anyway, feeling more emotionally stable today. Off to visit friends this weekend. It'll be the first time we've seen their baby. I realised this week that they must have conceived during or just after my first mc, and they gave birth the same week I started mc'ing my second. These are friends we used to go away with a lot, when I got pg and she was still pg I was chuffed that our kids would 'only' be 9 months apart .

Thanks for all the jizz vits advice gals. The Men E Vit website is funny, so aussie. I like the sporty attitude to it tho, takes some of the stigma that I think men in particular feel if their swimmers aren't tip top. TT will now be getting ultra competitive to have incredible sperms.

I'm also chewing down loads of vitamins in an effort to convince myself I am in control of something. A random selection of extra folic acid, Co-Q10, Omega 3 and a basic pre-conception vitamin. And I've bought a new cookbook - A Modern Way to Eat, which is really lovely. It's vegetarian and low on refined carbs/gluten but super tasty and not too much of a hassle. So when we do get back to ttc hopefully my body will be some kind of health goddess. Dunno when that will be as we only dtd once this month as the stress of everything else not exactly putting me in the mood, plus I'm turning into my stress-head hyper-critical self which is definitely not putting TT in the mood either.

cherry what vits were you taking? I often find that iron vits makes me puke, but there are some gentler formulations out there.

barking manly arm punch for you. take it out on the wallpaper.

Glad it's not just me, I concur there are diffed people EVERYWHERE at the moment. Haha, just went to type grrrrr and it autocorrected to Horror! Yes autocorrect, that too. With the rage that makes me want to saw my arm off.

Just arm rubs Barking loving your commitment to the home improvement project, midweek DIY? Respect.

Hospital stays are shit, doesn't it make you so thankful to be able to get the hell out of there with your health in tact?

I started some equivalent jazz up the jizz vits for girls last week. I've just put two and two together that they're the bastards responsible for hours of crippling stomach ache in the past few days that I've been doing my best to ignore despite fears of a terminal illness creeping in incase of needing to put of imminent IVF transfer . I had to come home from work this afternoon it was so bad. Thanks Boots. Fucking shite that is. Anyone else had similar?

Thanks for the woo CD recommendations. In the same vein I tramped around Google last night and found an actual relaxation visualisation download for DEIVF from Circle and Bloom. Even better and a 20% discount code. to make it only expensive The joy! What has TTC reduced us to? Desperate that's what. I used to spend money on gin to make myself feel better. Anyway it's helping for sure.

Vesp argh. I hope you can get some answers.

Ffs. In tears after watching the Vodafone advert (facetime call where he tells his dad it's a bit and holds the baby to the camera). Hate the droid. Hate ttc (or having to not ttc so feeling further and further left behind).

On hols so just a quick one- Effin, Mr Blue is on fertilaid- no idea if it works but gets good write up and you can choose specific vits for different spaff needs

Just nipping in quickly as I've got 5 mins left of lunch...
vesp I was bleeding for 5 weeks and got my bfn at 6? weeks. Are you still bleeding?
effin knitting is great, but I make toys, hats and gloves mainly, not baby garments. I do occasionally make teddies for new born but I have to force myself....

Thanks hags - I've had a clear scan (three weeks ago) and stopped bleeding shortly after that but I feel like that should definitely mean no more positive tests by now. GP time it is...

effin friends of mine managed to significantly improve morphology with vits, Wellman I think. They still needed IVF but that was because he also had dodgy motility - they saw quick improvement on the morphology and if they're moving like they should that might do the trick.

Hags! Been a long time. Family illness sucks and been spending far too much time in hospitals. I can confirm they are equally chaotic and occasionally brilliant in all departments.

Go go Cherry! What an exciting/nervewracking time. Hope you're holding it together. This sounds like a good time to do all the relaxing, toasty toes, lush healthy eating stuff. I may join you in solidarity can I have some of that oestrogen too please it sounds great?

Barking I cannot believe your dickwad consultant. Glad you managed to put her right though. They never bother to read the notes properly, it seems you've got to be really persistent to get the attention you need and are entitled to. I worry about people less pushy and articulate.

Vesps I'd call the GP or EPU to double check as bugs says. It is most likely nothing, and I was getting +'s three days before my AF turned up. Weird I know.

Fankle yee-hah! home straits

Sorry for all those surrounded by the smug diffed. I thought I would learn a new skill and started knitting classes. But of course everyone is knitting for their babies, friends' babies, baby nieces and nephews and I'm surrounded by pictures of babies wearing very cute woollen items. What was I thinking??? But it is a very nice relaxing thing to be doing.

TT had his jizz test results come through and apparently he's got wonky swimmers. Motility and number ok, but a low number of 'normal forms' (i.e. morphology). Apparently this can be associated with recurrent mc's and low fertility, but advice is just to test him again in 3 months and they'll do something if we mc again. If it's still an issue in 3 months then there is NO FUCKING WAY I am just waiting to mc again before they at least let us see a consultant. Was someone here saying that there are good vitamins that can jazz up the jizz?

Morning hags! Post-hols work frenzy has just about died down to a reasonable level. Ish.

chez hooray for the hormones and everything crossed for your lining. I am the least calm person in the world at the moment and cannot therefore suggest anything helpful...

fab yep yep on the bitter. Close friend due to pop any day: SIL in November: loads more in the new year and babies everywhere. I am entering year 4 of ttc in November. And I know several couples who either have just or are just about to get married and I know they'll all be at it too. I hope to god my other SIL (has one child but had INCREDIBLY difficult pregnancy and not inclined to have more) does not change her mind or I shall go mad. I do not want to fish slap you: I want to complain and drink gin.

And my much loved but teeeeny bit dysfunctional sister has just announced that she has just split up with her boyfriend so she, her four year old (erm. five year old? I don't know. BAD AUNTY.) and her six month old (this is definitely right) are moving from one end of the country to the other to move in with my mum. My mum hopes they won't be living together long or there will be stabbing. BESH mind says: at least if she moves to rural Norfolk she's less likely to meet yet another unsuitable man and get accidentally pregnant YET AGAIN (actually BW said this, bless him. Is there a male equivalent of a BESH?) Slap me, I'm evil.

Anyway. Why oh Why oh WHY am I not getting a sodding negative pregnancy test yet? The bastard hormones are still hanging around and I started miscarrying five (FIIIVE) weeks ago. Still taking an internet cheapy every few days to check on it: seems to have stopped getting fainter and is just hanging around, still really clearly. When do I worry something's gone weird?