Home on the amazing and determined TTC after mc-ers. We know all about the ups and downs, trails and tribulations,, how it feels to live in the cruel world of Facebook baby bombs. Solidarity, sisters!

Oh English I am so sorry. xx

Hi ladies,
Sadly I will joining you all again. Had my second scan this morning and although the sac had grown it hadn't grown enough and it was empty. Hoping to be allowed an erpc without another scan. I know my dates and know I should be further along than it was measuring.
Feel completely empty. Can't believe I'm having to go through it all again. Already worrying about ever being able to carry a baby to term.
Life is fucking shit

Oh smiling the 2ww, I'm not even there yet and already the thought of it is killing me.

I've put my finger on (one of the multitude) of emotions I am feeling - disappointment. Bitter, bitter disappointment.

I want a baby so badly, it's like a physical hurt. I've got to go and buy a pressie for my new nephew now, might go and visit later, haven't been brave enough yet. Sending you good vibes

Oh monten I feel the same, the lady in tesco was talking to me like they do and usually im happy to have a chat but I just wanted to calmly tell her to shut up, not scream or shout just calmly say "would you mind shutting up please, I dont want to hear anything you have to say". That sentence went round and round in my head until I left the shop

im feeling really weepy today, ive got lots to do so am trying to keep busy but the 2ww is really stressing me out

smiling "I feel like everyone is talking AT me" that is so true! I feel like I could have written your post myself.

When I'm grieving I become very introverted and quiet ( usually am quite the opposite). I'm lucky that DP has been off work this week but these past couple of days he's been doing my head in! Just talking, talking and wanging on about this garden project he's working on. Yesterday I turned around at one point and shouted 'will you please just shut up!'
I feel like just telling everyone to shhhhhhh. Especially people who are being sympathetic and trying to make me feel better. What your counsellor said makes total sense to me.

broody I accused DP of same

just

Thank you so much everyone - sal I'm afraid they've been snapped up. I feel like I don't know how to say I hope all you long term threaders are off here asap without sounding patronising or something, but I really do hope so. and a lot of

broody please dont cry x

I think that we just retreat into ourselves to cope and dealing with soneone elses pain is just to hard.

ive been talking to my counsellor about how I feel everyone is talking AT me ie if I ask dp if he would like a sausage or bacon sandwich all I want is a simple "sausage please" instead I get "sausage please because I like those pork and leek ones and bet they will be nice on a sandwich, and can I have brown sauce because I dont like ketchup in a sandwich" it makes me want to scream.

the counsellor says its because all my energy is going into healing and taking care of myself and that listening to the unnecessary words is just to exhausting; I think thats why its been so easy to let dp take care of me and push his grief out of my mind, its just too exhausting dealing with 2 lots of grief, but I feel so guilty about it this morning.

smiling I am crying reading your post. I think we think men move on quickly but in fact, your husband nailed it - they want to look after us and appear the strong ones, when really they are just as heartbroken as us. I hurt my dh the other day by saying he'd moved on the moment after it happened but I couldn't yet - he was quite upset by my comment, I was so sorry.

Hugs just x

Congratulations seasides

treacle sending you a big hug x

I cried in a card shop yesterday because they had a card saying "happy fathers day love the bump"

we chose to name the baby we lost because I was convinced it was a girl, we chose Charlotte and planted a rose as a kind of memorial. Yesterday she bloomed and we have a beautiful yellow rose, looking at it is the first time dp has cried. I found him sat in the garden at 1am, he admitted he had been so busy looking after me he had tried not to think about how losing her had affected him now I feel bad for not supporting him as much as I should have done.

With you there Sal... Been on then off again too many times since I joined this bus in October.

Lovely news seasides :)

Feeling low today. I would've been 12 weeks today.

seasides that's wonderful news! Great to hear from a graduate

Sal - I am not far behind at June 2013. This weekend I "celebrate" anniversary of my first miscarriage.

Great news Seasides! I miss the old gang ( think I'm officially the longest standing member on this thread - April 2013 - any advances girls?)!

If you haven't passed the sticks and lube on yet, I'd defo be interested, just can't work out how to PM you on my phone... Grrrrr

Great to see you back seasides and what great news!! Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy! Hugs!

Great news seasides!

Lovely news Seasides, I'm so pleased for you! x

Ah very uplifting news Seasides. Thanks for sharing. Here's to a very uneventful pregnancy for you!

Seasides - what wonderful news! So pleased for you and it cheers me up too. I hope all of us will be posting similar messages soon. Wishing you a boring remaining 6 months.

Seasides - what wonderful news! So pleased for you and it cheers me up too. I hope all of us will be posting similar messages soon. Wishing you a boring remaining 6 months.

I've learnt why you should never POAS when it's not a Friday (last Fri was the end of my 2ww but didn't have time to buy or pee on stick till today).

So I bought 2 tests today, rushed back up hill in the heat to home, sat on loo &...no wee. Drank a big glass of water, waited, waited, went back to the loo & this time only a tiny trickle of wee.

It must be due to the hot weather, my bladder must be completely empty! Really annoyed at wasting 2 tests on such a non-event...

Fantastic news Seasides! I hope you can start to relax a bit now and wish you a happy &healthy rest of your pregnancy.