About to start / Just started TTC no.2 (part 4)

Thanks everyone for messages re work cow! She is so two faced and has been trying to suck up to me today. I don't understand how or why someone would want to be like that. Such a waste of life being that malicious. I just hope one day she is a mum trying to make it all work.
AnyWAY concentrating on my lovely ds and growing bump. Sounds like lots of us need to find new jobs in the future! Maybe we need to think of flexi working opportunities that pay well...hmm!

I'm a business journalist working for a trade magazine Ginger, so completely un-healthcare related! I just want to do something more fulfilling and worthwhile, plus my job has changed quite a bit since I've had DD and not for the better.

Hungry that's what I'm hoping, I'm sure when my periods first returned after I stopped bf they weren't as irregular as last year. Maybe this pregnancy, even though short lived, will make me a bit more regular again!

And I won't be pausing ttc for any reasons other than health either. The last 8 months have shown me that you just never know what's going to happen so there's no point over-planning these things.

Gingerbread, what a short LP means is that the uterine lining breaks down before implantation can successfully take place, which means that you can't sustain pregnancy.

As implantation takes place at 6-12 DPO, you can get a positive HPT from 10-16 DPO. Usually!

In your position I'd say to wait til 12 DPO as I'd hopefully say you've a good chance if you get that far. But in practice I'd POAS tomorrow!

Better, midwife was fine, though I felt a bit rushed. Said my headaches etc were likely to be hormonal as wee and BP fine.

Told me to rest and drink plenty. Ha de ha to the former!

Didn't listen for heartbeat. Gutted about that. Said they don't listen at 16 weeks now as there's a chance they won't find it. :-(

My scan is on 26th March. Annoyed it isn't the week before as I'll be 20+6.

Metal, I'm glad you're resting and are felling relatively OK. You never know, your cycle may be 'reset' by all that's happened.

Swede, maybe it's because we are older that we wouldn't pause TTC? Or that we are just impatient?!

Toothpaste, IME there is always one person like that, sadly. Just try to focus on your job and the fact that mat leave isn't too far around the corner. :-)

Think I need to set myself a word limit!!!!!

Before I started I wanted to avoid winter babies, december babies, christmas babies, january babies...but now I just don't care! You can't plan these things, and like someone else said the baby may be early/late anyway. I think I will just be going for it, regardless of the resulting due date! If this cycle is successful my due date will be what it was with DD, and I actually think that's kind of funny and nice now, whereas 8 months ago I would of thought it would be awful.
I don't really want to say anything incase I jinx myself, but still no AF. I keep having cramps and twinges and thinking it could be a sign, but I am trying (and failing) not to get my hopes up. Wish I'd bloody just peed on a stick this morning, but I'm only 9dpo so probably largely pointless. Not sure tomorrow will even show anything, how does it work if you have a short LP!?
Metal you seem to be on the mend a bit, think focussing on something else is a great idea. I too am going to try the same. What do you currently do now for work, if you don't mind me asking? Vague general area if you are worried about giving too much away! Are you already in the health profession?

Swede good news on the scan, even if you couldn't see much. Hopefully no news is good news? Not too long to wait til the next one. Have you come any further on a nanny decision?

Guinness can't believe someone opened your mail! Hope they were embarrassed too! A break might be hard in terms of waiting, but hopefully it will give you a chance to take a mental break and refocus, and fill you with energy and positivity to try again in April/May when hopefully you will catch straight away! Will you give up completely? Could you not just keep having unprotected sex but don't time within your fertile period, so if it happens it happens, but you're not expecting it?

Toothpaste what a mean woman. To think she's a 'manager' too! Is there a chance she's jealous of your pg? Or is she past all that? Have you decided not to go back to work then after baby no.2, or just that job!?

Sorry to anyone else I've missed....struggling to concentrate today! Welcome to Vicky!

Thanks for the kind welcomes ladies, it's nice to see you all chatting so much and being supportive. I hope these next few weeks pass as soon as possible Swede.

Oops. Didnt realise there was another page. Ah metal I'm pleased to hear youre feeling not too bad physically. What a horrible ordeal youve had. Good plan re focussing on something else though.

How did you get on with the midwife yesterday hungry?

Hope theres been no af gingerbread how are you?

Ah guiness we would have been exactly the same with pausing ttc to avoid January as dds birthday is jan & we didnt want two that soon after Christmas. That said, I do think you can go on and on, we were also going to pause to avoid August so it wouldn't be youngest in its academic year but we decided not to and good job as we conceived that month.

hazy my scan is the 13th & I think hungrys is around then too so its going to be a scan boom few weeks!!

Hungry that's a good point, even if you plan carefully timings of TTC might not go your way. I once heard of friends of a friend who took off two weeks in December in order to TTC a baby because they were so keen to ensure that it would be born in Sept for academic reasons....
I never did find out what happened. Even at the time I thought it was a bit OTT given you really only need one or two lucky days to conceive, but now I wonder whether they realised that a December conception would actually mean an Aug birth, which they were trying to avoid...

Metal that sounds like a really good plan, it's easy to get caught up in TTC and family plans, but focusing on your own wishes and ambitions would be great I think. Don't write of studying with 2 DC, loads of people on MN do it. Maybe you could train as a HCA and then study for a nursing degree when DC are older? Glad you are feeling ok, savour that rest on the sofa

Oh, and my fingers are very very crossed for you gingerbread, hope AF is staying away x

Hi and welcome Vicky!

Swede sorry your scan was a bit disappointing, hopefully the next one will be more reassuring. It is annoying that all you seem to do is wait in early pregnancy... At least you've got your new job to look forward to and distract you.

Toothpaste that's really rubbish about your work colleague. Some people can be so mean and two-faced. Try not to let it get to you, though I know that's easier said than done.

Guiness we might well be joining you in not ttc-ing until April. I ended up having the D&C after all this morning, as the scan showed there was still some tissue left in my womb (though how that is possible after what came out of me Sunday night I really don't know!!)

Anyway, it all went well and I was home two hours later, now relaxing on the sofa and actually feel fine, if a little tired. They advise you to wait until you've had a period before starting ttc again, and considering the length of my cycles pre-pregnancy I might well be into April by the time we can try again.

I've decided to distract myself by trying to figure out what I really want to (and feasibly can) do work-wise. Being in hospital today reminded me that I've always quite fancied being a nurse, but given the 3-4 year uni course, shift work etc. it's probably not doable with one Dc, let alone potentially two. But I might look into healthcare assistant roles, though I've heard they're quite hard to come by these days and not paid very well, so will have to have a sit down with DH and go through our finances to see how much I would have to earn to keep us afloat...

That sounds about right, date wise, with your 'late' OV, doesn't it, Swede?

At least everything looks good / right for baby's age. That's excellent news.

And it's only 3 weeks til the scan as it's a nice short month :-)

I've never believed in pausing TTC to avoid dates, as there's no guarantee you'd get pregnant anyway. But I'm just impatient and won't stop something I've started! If that's the right decision for your family, then it's understandable.

Henrietta, your DH sounds like he's trying to limit it a little too much! Could be hard planning TTC around only a few acceptable months. And babies can be very early at times too, so there's no guarantee you'll avoid a date even if you fall pregnant in supposedly the 'right' month!

Hi to Vicky. :-) Welcome to a fairly lucky thread!

How frustrating to be waiting again Swede, but like you say at least it's not bad news. A healthy sac feels more real than a line on a stick. My scan is on 14th March so we can while away the next few weeks together...

Hi Vicki, hope your bfp arrives quickly.

Toothpaste that is a horrible thing to find out, and very unprofessional of your colleague. Do you think it's worth raising it with her? Or addressing it in some way? Just seems a shame for your team to have the message that this is what happens to people who work part time. But as you're only there a few more months maybe just biting your tongue is simplest! Glad all was well at the scan.

Guinness poor you, we waited for a while before starting TTC due to changes at my work and although it was the right decision in those months I found it really hard to see women with bumps or babies even though I knew we'd start TTC soon. I kept reminding myself of the reasons why waiting was sensible, and tried to focus on either doing things to prepare for pg, like exercising, or things I won't get a chance to do for a while like taking a few hours for myself to read and have a big coffee. But if it really gets you down, is a December baby such an awful thing?

Hi, Guinness. That's a tough one...

We've had the December talk too. DH thinks it's not a good idea, but we are realistic that time isn't on our side, so I'm off the pill & we will see how it goes. I don't know what my cycle will be yet, but DH has a birthday in feb; mine & DS are April - so there're always dates to avoid! Oh yeah - and then DH doesn't want to plan a baby for the end of the academic year!

Not quite sure which month he does want. I'd rather have one sooner as then ds and dc2 have a smaller age gap. DS is 2 in a couple of months.

All the best with your journey!

hi all. swede, all the best for your scan today. Can't believe it's here already!

welcome Vicky, I've not been on the thread that long either and am quite early on in stages of ttc so you're in good company!

toothpaste, so sorry you've been let down. People really suck sometimes. hugs and

metal, glad things have resolved themselves but I feel for you so much. Take time to grieve and process it x

I am feeling pretty sorry for myself today. We've decided to pause ttc until end Apr to avoid a Dec baby, and I do know in my head this is right for us, but I still so want another DC. This morning a pack of tests that I ordered before AF were delivered to me at work and, despite being marked private and confidential, were accidentally opened in the post room. am mortified. Then just now a colleague brought in his week old baby. He's gorgeous and I had a cuddle, was just fine, then when they walked away with him I nearly burst into tears on the spot. Had to take refuge in the toilets to have a little weep. I know it's early days yet but I'm just feeling a bit sorry for myself ATM

Hi all it's been ages as been working way too hard but popping in and trying to catch up. Not easy on a phone.
Metal - just so sorry. As everyone says deep breath and move on but I'm sure there will be sad moments. Look at swede though pg already. Fx same for u.
Bitter - def need new midwife. Very shocking. Why do thy work in these jobs if they don't care?!
Chinese sorry to hear that re your dad. Awful to have illness on top.
Swede let us know how scan goes. Sure all fine!
I've had my 20 weeks can and all well. Very excited to see him again.and the hosp is so much better than last place where we had ds.
Had horrible day at work today where found out the other manager in the team has been slagging me off to members of my team basically implying I am not doing my job as I'm part time. So nasty to find out especially as I thought we were friends. I'm the only working mum on the team and sometimes it feels lonely. I used to love my job so feel sad tonight that this girl has betrayed me. Why are people so poisonous sometimes? Think it's made my decision about going back to work after baby easier. I just have to get through next 4 months...
Night everyone x

Hi? DH and I are trying for no.2, cycle 1 not started yet, dd is 3yo. This looks like an oldish thread but wanted to say hi anyway... (Don't get how mumsnet works really yet...)

Afternoon all,
Metal I am so sorry for you. But at least it has happened naturally and you won't have to go into hospital or have too much interference with it. Hope your levels drop quickly and you can get back to ttc, and like Hungry says, I think you are quite fertile after already being pg. have they told you when you can get back to it? Don't worry about the depressing posts, it's totally understandable and that's what we're here for!! My Drs app is on thursday. I am an absolute nervous wreck today on knicker watch. I'm only 8dpo, but CD25, which is when AF arrived last time. I have no idea really when to expect my period to start, but I will poas wed morning if still no AF by then, although I feel I'm jinxing it just by writing that down! Been having pre-af cramps though so trying not to get my hopes up again.

Your gyno is amazing Swede!!! Glad you got your scan brought forward, let's hope there is celebrations for you this time tomorrow!

Wise decision Hungry to book in to see your mw if you're not feeling right, bet you're not struggling to feel symptoms now though! Can't believe you are almost 16 weeks already. and well done to your little DD! I woke up at 4am to go for a wee, and thought how great it is that I can just go back to bed and to sleep, I don't have to sit up trying to get a wide awake newborn baby back to sleep (small silver linings).

Rum and Hungry I hope you are right, if only we could just be told it will take you X long to conceive your baby, I wouldn't care if it was a year if I just knew!!!

Rum can you not pretend you were making those american 'biscuit' things!?? They're a bit like hard scones aren't they. I winged it with some crumble yesterday, never made a crumble before, and it was delicious!

Cross posted there!

Yay for a scan tomorrow, Swede. :-)

And a safety net is important, so I agree with you there, I think.

Ah, Metalhead. I'm sorry.

I hope after tomorrow you can start to put it behind you and move forwards. I hope you can start TTC soon. Apparently you're really fertile after an MC. Swede is proof of that! :-)

Morning all, hope everyone had a nice weekend.

Swede hope you're ok and no more bleeding. You should be able to see a heartbeat at 7 weeks, fx your scan will give you some reassurance.

Gingerbread is your GP appointment today? Good luck with that, hope he/she is sympathetic and helpful. I'd have no qualms about saying you've been trying for a year, as it usually takes a while to get things going on the NHS.

Chinese hope your chicken pox is getting better, my DD had it last week but thankfully it was only a mild case and I'd already had it as a child.

After bleeding lightly since Friday I think I finally miscarried naturally last night. I'm still going in to hospital tomorrow morning to get a scan, but hopefully everything will be gone and I won't need to have the op after all. Just want to move on now and get back to ttc!

And hopefully this will be the last depressing post from me - thanks for all the support ladies, it's really been a great help! xx