If TTC # 2 has turned you into a nut job this thread is for you! (Part 4)

Sebs you are spot on. We are blessed by tiny little adorable terrors!
Also in awe of you. Hope you get the all clear on monday, and can get back on track asap.

sebs, I am in awe of you. I have no doubt at all you will have another one. Take care. x

*Oh sorry Sebs,, I read through it too quickly to take it all in

Sebs!! What?? Oh god you poor thing. How are you sure it was a mc? Have you done more pg tests since? And there was me wittering on about my bloody vagina!!! I understand you not wanting to make a fuss though, you are coping admirably and so calmly, amazingly well. I'm glad you are feeling ok though and looking forward to the future. and for you xxx

You poor thing Zippy were you shocked at how much damage having a baby could do? I mean, I knew it wasn't going to be easy and I would be 'different', but the extent and length of the damage is a bit crazy! Still, doesn't put me off having more....Yes they did say it would be quite a while after surgery before I would feel all healed and comfortable again and ready for sex, about 6 months I think, so it would be a large break from ttc. I'll just put up and shut up for a bit longer I suppose.
Fedup I have lost bowel and bladder control, but it's nothing extreme, I'm not incontinent (yet!) It does get quite sore when dtd all the time, and it makes a difference to the way I fart!! Pelvic floor muscles would help but I always forget to do them. I think you ladies now know more about me than anyone does!!!
I'm not sure I could manage SMEP either! I'm wondering if we've been dtd too often, so trying to hold back a bit this cycle. I've still not got my positive opk, cd 15 tomorrow, but we dtd cd 10 and 12, and will go again tomorrow.
Glad you're feeling sick Fedup!! Good luck for your exams on sat, but will you be able to work as a PT once you are qualified now that you are pg or will you wait until after the baby is born?
Are you still having bleeding Sebs?

Hello lovely ladies. I am so pleased I popped in as fedup, your news has made my day! I hope so much that you get good news at the location scan and that that little one makes it all the way!

punky, great news too. Hugely hopful you have a better experience this time, I was completely in awe of how strong you were through all you went through with your ectopic last year.

sebs, well, I had bleeding this time from weeks 5-10, I was heartbroken, then hopeful, then back to sad for weeks. DH nearly had a breakdown! This time it has been good news so far, I am really hopeful for you too.

Hey bart! Has anyone heard from dildoos? She was so kind to me with my early mc last yr, I often wonder about her.

Sorry re af zippy. I hope you are ok. I did SMEP twice and almost killed us!! It's ok if the 3 days on a row bit falls fri through to Sunday but bloody hard if not!! We ended up doing part SMEP which was every other day and maybe every day with ewcm was at its heaviest! (Ugh sounds gross sorry).

Feeling very sick today which is a good sign in my book. I've got my PT exam on Saturday which I feel so unprepared for and scared will fail! Plus preg (no matter how early) somehow affects my spatial awareness and balance so I'm worried about that too. Oh well if I fail I fail. Can retake.

They said to me if I had a big baby in there I may need c section, but it was on how close my children were, but I didn't think that's a prob now.

Ouch ginger, does that affect doing a no 2?! I recall when I was in theatre the doctor saying, 'we really need to stitch you up soon as losing a lot of blood and you may also lose control of your bowels forever' nice thing to hear hey?!

I might try it. I still think I have a short luteal phase though, based on all the symptoms and the fertility monitor. But I think yes, will try a few more months yet before getting all the tests etc. did you do sMEP at all sebs? xxx

Hi gingerbread, I don't recall being given any option at any stage. The fourth degree tear was very severe and the surgery immediately afterwards took some hours with a Consultant called in to do it. I didn't have great bladder/bowel control for a little while but it got fixed and the work after has been a long road but great results.

In all honesty, I don't think anyone would know the difference now physically and I feel absolutely fine. But yes, they were clear at every stage including immediately afterwards that it would be c sections from now on. I wouldn't even consider anything else. But there might be a good reason for you to wait and if the surgery will interrupt TTC that might not be a bad reason to wait? Though I wouldnt be at all afraid to ask for a section if you thought that was a good reason either.

Yes, definitely AF. Boo hiss. On the plus side I have a letter from the GP confirming all bloods are now entirely normal and ovulating is happening. So that's something!

Hi all, how are you all feeling? Please don't leave this thread now that you have your bfps, your knowledge and support is indispensable!

Zippy was/is it AF in full flow now?

I too have 'downstairs' issues after having DD. She was born very quickly, and the mw who stitched me up didn't do a great job. I had a borderline third/fourth degree tear which she didn't realise at the time. In short I now have no perineum and will need reconstructive surgery at some point, but the gyno advised me to wait until I was done having children. It does impact my way of life though so this is another reason why it sucks having to wait so long for another baby. Zippy do you think it was a good decision to just get it fixed and resign yourself to c-sections? I am starting to wonder if I should go that way too, two and a bit years is a long time to still be a bit sore! Again though, it hasn't put me off wanting more babies!!

Just to say massive congrats to fedup
Still lurking to see you all through your BFPs. X

thanks fedup. similar sort of thing, except a fourth degree tear after a very long back to back/forceps labour and the stuff afterwards has taken a bit more sorting out. At first things seemed quite bad with the effects of the damage, I was worried indeed, but the repair stuff and physio has been very successful and they have been great but it took a long time to get there, over a year. They wanted it to be as healed as it could before pregnancy strained muscles again. All future births have to be sections but that is fine with me if I get chance. x

In a way that's a good thing zippy - then you don't have anyone asking, 'so when are you having another?' Or 'it's about time for number 2'. Does my head in.

Can I ask what happened? It doesn't scare me hearing stories (except when baby doesn't come out of it ok). I had third degree tearing but that after the initial theatre 'repair work' it only required physio and pelvic floor clinic stuff and laxatives for months!!! It's so attractive isn't it. Hope you have healed properly now.

Ds had me in giggles this evening. I just love the funny things he says. I'm so lucky to have him :) and I know I can say that on here as we all have one dc to brighten up our world!! Xx

Thanks so much everyone. I've said before, but I haven't told anyone else at all in RL apart from the doctor so it is nice to have your support. AF was cruelly very light at first making me get my hopes up all over again as I had implantation bleeding over 2 or 3 days last time, I'd thought it was AF until I got sore nipples and morning sickness! But I'm pretty sure it's AF real now.

Nobody asks in RL anyway, I had a very difficult birth and it needed months of hospital treatment afterwards to fix me up (ignore all that, pregnant ladies, I'd do it again in a flash obviously!) so they told me not to TTC until it was over (not that it made much difference as AF cycles didnt come back for ages). But I think my NCT pals who know all that assume that's why no 2 hasn't happened. I blame myself for carrying on bfing to 21 months too, I was so proud of doing it whilst working funny shifts and long hours, but maybe everyone was right about it being too long for a reason.

Anyway, I have a gorgeous DD who is talking very fluently and she always makes me feel better. And I am very pleased for sebs, fedup, punky and the rest but I want you to stay on here as I'm going to miss you otherwise x

fedup, you're going to be fine. Nobody can be so unlucky again. The odds must be good. Really.

Hi bart can't believe you are 31 weeks - woweeee! But also shows how long I've been on this thread so hope this time is my one!!!

Today has been hell. Literally shaking whenever I go to the loo out of fear. How on earth am I going to get through this?!?!

I phoned EPU and (clearly nicer than punkys EPU) as I have a location scan booked for 20th feb when will be 6 weeks... If I get that far. They did tell me to ring when I got the bfp and the reception lady recognises my name - not sure if a good or bad thing!!!

Thinking of you ginger and zippy. It is unbelievably hard to be around people who you know through DC1 who are pregnant or with new borns. I sometimes feel sick at the prospect of hanging out with them. It's really tough and go easy on yourselves. The nice EPU doctor was the FIRST medical professional I've met who understood that and actually let me talk about it. I think she could genuinely empathise which is so rare. Take care everyone xx

Zippy I hope you're feeling a bit better today? I agree with fedup, just throw a little family party for your DD, she won't know the difference anyway at the age of 2! I really had to force myself to go to playgroup yesterday, there is one lady there who brings her newborn along and a few others with big bumps. But on the other hand I have just met a lovely new lady who only has the one, same age as my DD, who also isn't pg! All the words you use to describe this journey are spot on, and I am feeling just the same as you I'm only on cd11 and I have given up hoping already this month, I just know in my heart of hearts that there are other issues at hand, and I'm not sure I have the financial/emotional stability to be going down that route. I am trying so hard to accept one child as being ok and enough, but I get so struck by sadness when I think I won't have anymore babies. And don't blame yourself for leaving it til 30's, you did what you thought was the best for you! I had DD when I was 25, I'm now 27, thinking that by starting early I wouldn't have any problems and would bang out 4 babies before I was 30 (yes 4!) but look what's happened...so I don't think your age would make a blind bit of difference if there's still a 3 in it!
Fedup Amazing Congratulations to you!!!!! I am very happy for you, and I hope hope hope that this one is a sticky one for you, you deserve it. If I conceive this month my due date will be the same as it was for DD too!!
Hello Bart, I don't know you, but amazing congratulations at being at 31 weeks!!

Hello ladies still lurking here occasionally and needed to say a big congratulations to all the bfp's!!! fedup im so so pleased for you! I really hope its a sticky one. You too sebs try not to worry too much about the bleeding. There are lots of people in my april thread that have had bleeding.

All is well with me 31 weeks yesterday. Sickness all gone and just a bit of SPD but its not too much of a problem.

Good luck to all the newer ladies that probably wont even know me it will happen!

So sorry Zippy.. I was hoping it was your month too :-(

FedUp - My due date is 1 day after DS's birthday.. weird huh!! Maybe we are extra fertile in January's!

xxx