If TTC # 2 has turned you into a nut job this thread is for you! (Part 4)

It's definately the right time to go back to the doctors. The 'I'm starting to feel a bit mad' is a sign that you need to in my book. Getting worked up about it makes it worse and harder (and less likely to conceive ) to deal with each month.

If doctor turns you away, find a good local fertility consultant and I think a consultation is £200. I was planning to do that in January (but got preg with the mc one) after the GP told me I had to wait another year before she would help me (after already 1 yr of trying). My sanity and sense I was doing something was worth that price tag. I teamed that approach with my 'projects' idea - so focussing on other stuff (new career, holidays, house decoration) so although I was going to do something about ttc it wasn't the focus of everything - which it had become and was making me so so miserable.i hope this makes sense and is in some say helpful.

Have you tried cough medicine? I'm a strong believer in it as got upduffed twice when used it! (Obv first pregnancy was without it as that was before I was a nut job!)

Glad all is going well too for you punky!!

Sorry to hear about AF Zippy I hope next month is your month and the GP appt helps.

Fab news about your scan FedUp So so pleased for you :-) I am also waiting for 12 week scan now.. just wishing these next 4 weeks away as quickly as possible

xxx

12 cycles for me fedup. Number 1 conceived instantly and I just can't cope very well with this. Although admittedly only a couple of cycles since finding out the hormone levels were normal again post bfing. I think I am actually beginning to be a little mad about this, I get tearful all the time when I think about it. I'm functioning normally and nobody knows but even an email from a quite elderly male colleague in a different office that I barely know asking after DD, and talking about his grandchildren with a PS "any sign of a brother or sister for her?" was quite enough to privately upset me.

made another GP appointment for a couple of weeks, she can maybe get me booked in for those scans or something, I'd pay every penny i have to take me a step further.

Things looking great for you fedup. Can't wait to hear your positive news at 12 weeks.

how are you doing ginger/everyone?

Sorry zippy. It's so shitty. Even though you held of POAS there was always that 'could it be IB' hanging in the background. How long ttc now for you?

Thanks ginger... I'm relieved to say there is a healthy looking 8 wk bean in me. I got myself very worked up before hand so then had a good cry afterwards (relief that is). Next biggie is 12 weeks....

Oh zippy how utterly crap for you. I am sorry. How are you holding up?
The cramps have stopped now, had them a bit when I woke up yesterday morning, but after a busy morning with DD they disappeared, am fine today. Well, I have a hangover after having friends round for dinner, but it's one of the amusing, slightly enjoyable hangovers!
fedup huge goodluck today, will be thinking of you. Have you already had your scan then by now?

out here inevitably! :( :( :(

I'm a Christmas baby and really love being so, don't let it put you off ladies. x

Oh zippy I think you are wise not to go POAS. I've seen IB or AF posts go both ways to be honest. I hope you get some clarity either way soon this week as the 'is it or isn't it' phase is horrible, particularly if you have had IB before.

Yeah am ok thanks ginger. Second scan tomorrow (should be 7 plus 6 based on last scan). Been feeling horrific so I hope all good signs.

I too didn't want a Christmas baby once but then didn't care as long as I had one! I was the same with August babies too for school reasons (although I am one!!) hope those cramps ease ginger. Sometimes our bodies do odd things. But if they continue I would ask for a scan to check all ok. I had awful cramps the month I got preg with my son. I booked a doctors appt and then thought i should better do a test before going just to prove am not pregnant - it was my first bfp!!

Take care ladies xxxx

Ah zippy, what a crappy situation to be in. I can understand you not wanting to POAS, as even if it is negative you won't be able to believe it until AF arrives! it does sound unusual for AF to be taking her time to get going, and especially if you are early, but like fedup I don't want to say too much. All in all it's just a shit situation, and a waiting game basically. I think it's quite rare to get a late bfp after several bfns, as you say I think most of those posts end with a bfn and then a late AF.
I guess only time will tell and see what happens during the week. Hope you manage to not obsess over it too much, and can get on with other things!

I have been having really bad cramps this afternoon, have been refilling a hot water bottle for hours so its always burning hot. Not sure what's causing them, haven't had a positive opk yet and it's a few days early so I don't think it's that.
If it weren't for the ongoing time frame and the fact that every failed month adds to the pressure and my belief that something is wrong, I actually don't want to get pregnant this month or next month as it would give me a due date very close to christmas. But then, I don't really care when a baby is going to be born now, just as long as I get one! Hopefully by taking the pressure off and not really wanting it, it will work for us!

Uneventful weekend for you I hope fedup?

Well, I am fairly sure I am out, but AF so far this month is incredibly light and mostly brown. there was a tiny bit on Friday, some more yesterday afternoon and a little bit today, nothing at all overnight. I usually have very heavy periods especially since they came back a year ago after having the baby so it is definitely different from normal and a bit early but could well just be taking a few days to get going just for extra cruelty. Last time I was pregnant I did actually bleed for a few days and just assumed it was AF. It was only when I got sickness, huge breasts, sore nipples and nausea that I decided to test.

(Ah, the halcyon days of getting pregnant on the first attempt less than 3 years ago and not knowing what implantation bleeding, luteal phases, OVing or FSH levels even were!)

I don't want to POAS because it will be a bfn and then I will still pretend to myself it could be wrong because I only OV'd on thursday of last week.
These types of messages of "is it AF or implantation" always seem to end with a heartbreaking post a few days later so I am kind of resigned to it not really being good news. I am also exhausted and emotional but the latter came simply because of AF being here I guess tomorrow might be the beginning of AF proper so will end the ability to kid myself for another few weeks!

Hope everyone else doing ok! x

Thank you zippy. I'm not going to relax about this one at all I don't think - but perhaps a bit if I make it past the 12 week scan.

Ok, I won't say too much here but that does sound promising re IB - and that you had it before. And 7 dpo ish is about right too. But I will shut up and keep my fingers crossed for you.

I'm only 7 weeks. Feels an eternity though!! I think I will be almost 8 on Tuesday for next scan. Wish time would go quicker....!

Hi ladies,
Is brownish bleeding normal for you zippy? Have you had anything else since? I am really hoping it is implantation for you, it is such a cruel trick that implantation could well be the beginnings of an early AF though, especially with a short luteal phase and slightly irregular periods, you just don't know where you're up to or what to think. If you had IB with your last bfp though this is a positive sign? When will you POAS do you think?
Fedup glad you are feeling tired and sick all a good sign like you say. Good luck for your scan next week, I hope the weekend passes by uneventfully for you, yes how many weeks are you now? How long has your best friend been ttc? Is this her first? I don't know anyone else in rl really that is going through this, I have started earlier than all of my friends, and I hope to god they don't have to experience the doubt of being able to get pregnant month after month. It is just so awful, as you say it really does suck the life out of everything else, which is hard when you already have a wonderful DC to look after. I veer dramatically from just loving on and appreciating my DD so much, to feeling desperate and heartbroken that she may grow up on her own and I can't build our family for her.
I'm on cd 10 today, dtd earlier on. Feels like a lifetime ago but also just yesterday that AF arrived. I started the opks again today, so will give the Drs a call when I get my positive to book in for the tests 7 days from then.
Hope the others are ok xx

I'm thrilled for you fedup. Oddly one of the benefits of this thread is that you get to experience the highs of other bfps and I really do love hearing the success stories.

Yes, AF is early if not implantation. It used to come on day 27 but since sept/oct it has been longer. This would be day 26, which would be a good few days earlier than in recent months but only a bit more than a week since OV so short luteal :(

I don't suppose it will be but I did have implantation bleeding with my other pregnancy. I'm probably kidding myself, I don't want to have to cope with the crushing blow that is AF yet again :(

how many weeks are you fedup? x

Oh no. But I have everything crossed its implantation as still a little early, right?

I'm ok thanks. Last couple of days have felt extremely tired and sick. Although it's hard I'm not complaining as to me these are good signs. I had MS with my first mc but not as bad as this so hoping this is a sign. Second scan on Tuesday so getting nervous for that.

In case sebs doesn't see this I think she is doing ok - she's on my the ttc after mc thread after my recommendation I was on there too. I still check there too as like this thread, I have high hopes for some more bfps from the lovely ladies I've met.

One of my best friends text me yesterday to say she is so down about ttc. It breaks my heart that people have to go through such long journeys to have their babies. 2013 was the hardest year of my life. I so get how horrible ttc is and heartbreaking, draining and has this ability to suck all the life and happiness out of people. Wish it was more fair.

Got everything crossed for zippy and ginger and sebs if you are lurking. Bfps I hope very soon. Lots of love xxxxx

thanks fedup. It's not looking great. A tiny tiny bit of brownish bleeding this afternoon. hasn't recurred and could be implantation, but knowing my luck over the past 11 cycles....

how are you? Wonder how sebs is doing, missing you if you're lurking x

Good luck zippy. I hope this is your month. Almost at the end of the 2 ww. X

hello! punky is right, fedup, she and cake really do all deserve to have no further problems! good luck to you all.

ginger, hope you are ok. In some ways my GP was great ordering bloods straight away, getting me a scan the next week etc etc but in hindsight it was only 6 months in and was still breastfeeding, I think it sort of made me think there was a problem when in reality there perhaps wasn't/isn't, but I am grateful nonetheless. The consultant really set my mind at rest about the bfing hormones suppressing my chances of conceiving. Your day 21 tests should reassure you?

I'm between OVing and AF. AF due Sunday-Tuesday and I OV'd in the middle of last week so slightly longer luteal phase hopefully but not getting my hopes up this month. Well trying not to.good luck everyone.

Hello ladies, still lurking and great to hear everyone's news, so pleased about the scan punky yippee! Sorry to hear you're poorly though, get well soon.

ginger I know exactly what you mean about the 'try to relax' comment, so bloody irritating, but sadly correct! Completely agree with fedup about mini projects - I'd started looking at holidays, planning this year's veggie patch etc etc just to make sure I was thinking about something else which made all the difference for me.

I've got my 12 wk scan date through (26th March) and that sent me into all sorts of nuttiness, I genuinely think I'm worrying so much more this time around and it's irritating me! I don't think doctor google helps at all, I am now certain I'm having an mmc or blighted ovum or something else to mean the scan will be all dooooom. Stupid stupid brain I want to switch it off! I considered paying for an early scan but realised even if I do that and all is fine I'll still convince myself something will go terribly wrong after that! I think my body copes ok with being pregnant but shame my mind does not! So I've vowed not to google anymore and also only visit this thread on mn as some others, especially the antenatal boards, are full of people stressing even more than me!

Wishing everyone lots of luck and i will keep lurking as I think this thread is due it's next bfp

Also meant to say, congrats too FedUp on the scan.. fingers crossed for both of us (Cake too) that we get through this in one piece.. surely we deserve this after everything we have been through!xxx

Thanks Ginger and FedUp

I was starting to have all day nausea, but have now got a.. well not sure if it is a chest infection, or just normal bad cough/cold. Have been coughing so much, and spent all day yesterday in bed :-( Nausea has generally disappeared which concerns me a bit.. though I am feeling so rough maybe it is just hiding under all the other levels of illness. Also I have a backache as I have been spending so much time in bed, and my stomach really hurts from all the coughing.. so even though logically I know thats the reason I am still terrified of MC... and FedUp I also googled MC stats the other day... time just seems to be going at a snails pace.

Anyway, have had to call in sick at work today which I don't think will have gone down well, manically busy time in the office at the moment. Am just hoping the nausea doesn't kick up as well as I really can't take any more time off work!

No idea about the scan ginger.. in my area the midwives don't get in touch until 8-10 weeks (with the ectopic they were calling me when I would have been 10 weeks, which was lovely - NOT.. Can't understand why there isn't some sort of system to notify them, especially as they are in the same building as the GPs!) Anyway, I'm assuming once they call they then sort out the scan.. I can't remember how it worked with DS.. that was 3 whole years (and another lifetime) ago!

Hope you are all ok, happy Monday!xxx

ginger did you see the same doctor as me?! I wanted to punch her when she said the dreaded 'just relax'. It's so difficult but you know my story... When I did relax I got preg. Not totally relax as that would never happen but a lot less anxious and stressed about it. Remember - mini projects. No matter how small or seemingly insignificant, it will help take your mind of constant ttc thoughts. Ttc took over my brain and was exhausting.

Yay punky so pleased for you!! I cried in my scan too, just so much relief there was something in right place.

I've spent the evening googling miscarriage stats as still so worried. I've got to step away from google...

Hi ladies, Mumsnet has been a bit quiet recently hasn't it.
How are you all doing? Sebs are you still lurking? Hope you are ok.

Fedup my DD is 2 years and 3 months so very close! it was definately AF, I did hope it was IB actually, as the first day was quite light, but it soon turned into full on AF. Total crazy head - I even POA pregnancy stick on day two to see if it was a positive and I had miscarried, as I was two days late compared to last cycle and it seemed especially heavy this month. It was negative obviously!!
AF is all done now so time to get back to it. Just bought some more cheap opks to go alongside my clearblue smiley ones, they're too expensive to use every day!

Cake only another month or so to go, fingers crossed for you until then. Sounds like it's all ticking along smoothly for you though so far

Punky that is fantastic news! How long until your 12 week scan then? Hope you are feeling ok, but also tired and sick!!

I went to see the Dr on thursday then, she was lovely and said she could see no reason to be concerned as we already have one DD so everything works as it should, we are both young and don't smoke etc. But now that I've had a few days to think about it I'm actually a bit annoyed that she was quite dismissive, she did refer me for day21 tests, but didn't have much to say about my concerns over my short cycles, or recent irregular cycles, and she doesn't think a short LP would be an issue. I was a bit of an emotional wreck as soon as I got in there though, so perhaps she is thinking stress is my biggest factor in preventing me from getting pg, she did tell me to try and stop worrying and to stop trying so much, and just 'enjoy ourselves'! So I guess it's just more sex for us, healthy eating and minimal caffeine and alcohol. Sigh.

Zippy where are you in your cycle this month?

Hey folks, sorry I have been so quiet, been a hectic week and also incredibly scared about the scan. Turned out fine though, baby made it to the right place this time, and saw heartbeat. I was sobbing through the whole thing. Now just trying to get my head around it. Been so scared of another ectopic it's hard to suddenly relax!

Ginger, how did it go at the docs?

Hi Drews, I hope you find as much support on this thread as I have.xxx

Hey ginger thank you. And so sorry about af. Are you sure as that's only 10 dpo? Good idea to get down to the doctors and get the ball rolling. I also promised myself I would throw any milestones out the window - like age gaps or being pregnant by my would be due dates as these were just horrific when they passed and made me feel such a failure. There is no perfect age gap either I have learnt so try not to stress about that.

My DS is at a funny age too - he cheers me up no end. He's 2 and 4 months and love his cheeky sense of humour. He's a right little character and know he is going to do a lot of winding mummy up when he's older!!

Hi drews hope you are ok. Plenty of room here.

Glad all going ok cake.

How are you punky and zippy? And sebs if you are lurking here too xx

Hi ladies. Squish up n let me on please.

I'm trying to conceive number 2. My first is nearly 18 I'm being driven nutty!

Went to Gp yesterday as month 3 failed for me. Gave doc all my dates ad he didn't view me as an app using fruitcake.

I am getting a cervix check next month as I'm worried it's been damaged by laser treatment and yesterday we picked up conception support pills from boots.

Oh boy what a pain this is!

Oh ginger I'm really sorry to hear that, good luck with the doctor tomorrow and do keep us posted.

fedup that's excellent news, you must feel so glad to know its's all going in the right direction, wishing you lots and lots of luck x

All just ticking along here very quietly, got my appt through for my 12 wk scan which will be later on in March and now I'm just stressing that it will be all bad news as I'm basically symptom-less apart from mega tiredness. So it just goes to show it wasn't just TTC that made me a nut job, I'm just one anyway it seems although physically my body copes ok with pregnancy my brain does not and makes me even more loopy.

Lurking away, keeping it all crossed to see those BFPs flooding in very soon xx