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Conception

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TTC no 3? Anyone just started / about to start / about to start thinking about it?

461 replies

bonzo77 · 06/11/2013 14:59

I am absolutely not going to go nuts about it this time like I did for no 2. Because my kids have each other and won't be alone looking after their ancient parents in years to come. But a 3rd would be a bonus. And part of me doesn't care either way, and another part cannot wait for a lovely little snuggly new born. And part of me is enjoying getting my nights back, and my body, and is worried about the money, the lack of bedrooms, the need for a bigger car, having another miscarriage, or high risk pregnancy, a 3rd CS, a baby in intensive care. But then 5 months of no contraception and nothings happening..... The baby is 11 months, and we said we'd start putting more effort in once he is 1....

Anyone in the same boat? Want to hang out and worry / pretend not to worry?

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snowpink · 15/12/2013 19:28

Bonzo - any more symptoms? Or do you think the cramps were definitely caused by the beef?

Bumble - it's so difficult when you don't agree on dc3. Dc1 and 2 were no brainers for us but we discussed ttc for no 3 for months and financial security was very important for dh. But it's just not something you can compromise on, which makes it so bloody hard! Do you have any friends with 3 dc? To see how it works in real life helped my dh too I think.

MissingMyMarbles · 15/12/2013 19:24

Can I join in? I would love a third Xmas Grin I am so broody it's untrue!! I have a rubbish obstetric history with mc's and high risk, complicated pregnancies, but through that I have two beautiful DD's. The little one is only 17 months so despite the broodiness, we do want to have a bigger age gap as there is between them. Besides, I'm still weaning off the breast and so haven't had a period yet, therefore pregnancy is unlikely at the minute.
Lovely to 'meet' you all.

redspottydress · 15/12/2013 18:07

Yes non identical twins, I think the risk of twins again is 1 in 12. I loved having twins, and I wanted another set until I had a singleton! I love having one baby although I think the twin relationship is very special. We're away on holiday next summer so we're waiting a couple of months before we start TTC. I'm 36 so don't want to leave it too long.

bumbleandbumble · 15/12/2013 14:03

My statistics…

35 years old, two children, aged 2 and 3.

My husband is still saying No Way to number three. It really gets me down, I wish so badly that he was excited about it…even if now is not the right time, which I do think our money struggles is an issue.

actually I am happy to wait…but this damn biological clock and fertility early scares me…I to pregnant straight away both times but soooo many of my friends over age 35 are having MC after MC and I really do worry about my fertility lasting…

so envious of all you ladies with men who want three…please think about how lucky you are.

bonzo77 · 14/12/2013 23:01

snow i know what you mean. I'm also pleased my MC was not my first pg. I know so many people who's first pg ended in MC (and in one case a still birth). It takes away your innocence, I certainly did nothing but fret during my last pregnancy. I guess my next one will be the same. Interesting that you felt uncertain from the start. Subconciously knowing this one wasn't to be? I was soooo negative right from day 1 of the pg that I lost. And another friend was super negative about a pregnancy that ended in a still birth. That's a different person from the SB above. These tragedies are so frequent. Aren't i sweetness and light tonight?!

redspottydress too late to be interested in joining.... you're one of us now you've posted here! But it would be baby 4 for you... are you twins identical or not? If not, I'm sure you know it could be babies 4 and 5!

Now seriously. What is going on with all this CM? And I have had cramping on and off (mostly off) the last few days. I'm going mad thinking it's implantation. Probably just my mother's cooking. We went to hers last night for dinner, she did roast beef, I don't really eat much proper meat. I had implantation cramps each time in the past. TBH the timing is not good if I am pregnant. Oh well, we'll manage!

bunny post a photo of your pee sticks?

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snowpink · 14/12/2013 21:22

Thanks for the welcome! Low key optimism is well put! I'm just glad it didn't happen as my first pregnancy, at least I do have two brilliant kids and they are a good distraction on top of it. And to be honest, I felt uncertain right from the start thinking statistically it had to be my turn at some point. I hardly know a mum who hasn't had a mc.
I just thought it was so funny when I was always the one trying to sway dh to have another (very reluctant) however when I tested positive I was so scared how we would manage and he came home completely happy saying "Do you know what, I always wanted three kids!" So at least it brought both of us on the same page.

redspottydress · 14/12/2013 21:18

Hello! I'm interested in joining as we are thinking of TTC for the third time. I have twins who are 3 and a baby 18 months. I know I want another but worried about all the same things as you all! Will be good to talk about it.

bonzo77 · 14/12/2013 19:29

Welcome snowpink. Sorry for your recent loss. Nothing like a miscarriage to make you desperate for a baby IME. They sometimes say you're extra fertile after. Not sure if that's true.

This is a nice thread. All with children and some of us having had miscarriages and other complications in our obstetric histories. It's not all out rose tinted specs, but low key optimism.

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OrangeFizz99 · 14/12/2013 19:13

Oh snowpink sorry to hear about the mc.

I think this is the place for you, welcome. It's not as busy as some ttc threads, probably because of all the children :)

We found the decision to have a third very hard bit now we have decided it feels very frustrating not to just be automatically pg!!

snowpink · 14/12/2013 14:54

Hello all, I this might be the right place for me. Have two sons, 4 and 21 months, and fell unexpectedly pregnant a couple of weeks ago but sadly miscarried at 6 weeks. At least it helped us decide that we definitely want a third dc although it scares the hell out of me (sometimes can't even cope with two, difficult pregnancy and birth with ds2 and now the miscarriage...) but hoping to find lots of support here.

I promised myself I won't get obsessed with cycles etc this time so I won't find out that I'm pregnant a lot later on but don't think that will last long...

OrangeFizz99 · 14/12/2013 13:47

Sorry yes meant bunny. Nauseous is good though.

I have decided today that even third time round I do not like ttc!

Spottybra · 14/12/2013 10:31

We would scrape by, and we are both too proud to ask for help. We would certainly never ask our families again no matter how much we love them (long story there). I couldn't ask for my baby things back, some have gone to a teen mum who is due soon and others to charity shops or friends.

Congratulations to everyone though and good luck to those trying.

bonzo77 · 14/12/2013 10:13

spotty could you get any stuff back? I'm sure if you "happen" to mention it, you'll get loads of hand me downs. And depending on the increase in income you might be able to pay for some help: cleaner, ironing, takeaways.

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bonzo77 · 14/12/2013 10:11

orange oh god, not woo hoo yet, if at all. Unless you've had a premonition. I guess u meant bunny. I get very nauseous for all sorts of reasons. Largely because I cannot be arsed to eat meals then pick at soreen.

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OrangeFizz99 · 14/12/2013 08:45

Woo woo yay bonzo! Was this one cycle 4 for you? Anything you did different?

Welcome spotty. I keep thinking about all the things ive given away too

Spottybra · 14/12/2013 08:25

We are thinking about it but not sure. Dh is keener than I am. He is looking at starting s/e and bringing home in a day what he earns in a week of being employed. It is realistic, his days would also be shorter and he could return home every night.

However, I'm under no illusion it will be me doing everything, just with more disposable income to hand. He isn't home five nights a week as it is. We only downsized our car a year ago and another baby means another new car.

Ds and dd sleeping through the night now. Dd will be out of nappies next summer. They have a bedroom each. Days out don't revolve around feeding times anymore.

Another baby would be a dream but then I think about the cost as I have given all my baby things away.

BunnyBaby · 14/12/2013 08:13

Bonzo and Cake, I'm very excited here for you, all my 'early preg symptoms' where just that!

Will be checking here daily to see when you begin your poas'ing.

I poas again this morning and the line is definitely darker, so feeling more 'positive'myself (pardon the pun!) xxx

bonzo77 · 13/12/2013 23:34

AF due any time between Sunday and Wednesday. Intend not to test till Wednesday. Though my appetite is off and I've felt nauseous today on and off. But sometimes I do anyway.

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Cakecrumbsinmybra · 13/12/2013 15:55

AF not due until next Weds at the earliest...

BunnyBaby · 13/12/2013 13:54

Thanks Orange!

Bonzo, Bacon, Cake - who's next to test?

I won't move to grads until I'm at least 5 days late as I think I have had other chemical pregnancies in the past (3 days late followed by heavy period).

OrangeFizz99 · 13/12/2013 12:59

bunny! A lines a line!! Congrats!

Mmmbacon · 13/12/2013 11:07

Bonzo and orange thanks for the messages of support, I would be delighted to be expecting again, financially it would be a strain but that aside I wou ld be absolutely thrilled as would dh,

I spent most of ds 2 years longing for a new baby but I think v that was mostly hormones as was bf for a long time, I had just starteds to feel or family was complete and stopping feeling jealous of other pg women and here I am back hoping for a bfp

bonzo77 · 13/12/2013 09:53

With DS2 I tested 11 dpo, 3 days before AF was due. The line was very faint on an internet cheapie strip (too pale to show in the photo I texted DH). On a proper £££ FR it was more definite. I tested daily with cheapies and the line got darker for about 10 days. So I wouldn't get too hung up on the faintness. It's only just implanted so the HCG levels will be barely detectable.

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Cakecrumbsinmybra · 13/12/2013 07:52

Wow, keep us posted!! You are definitely pregnant, so I hope it all goes well for you. Strange cat!!

BunnyBaby · 13/12/2013 06:54

Thanks Bonzo, I'm still cautious as it's so faint, have uploaded to my profile.

Usually I only test when I'm 3 days late as have had negatives early on with DS2. Usually when testing when I'm late I get a very dark line.

The even more confusing thing is that my cycles have been a regular 26 days for the past year rather than 28. So I'm very happy there is something there, but want it to be darker.

Will test again tomorrow. bunny x