Posifrickentivity all round, with a good healthy dash of project desperate. New thread, new luck, new BFPs and Summer 2014 babies all round please! TTC after MC

Nothing like a baby bombshell. I've had that a few times as well, even had people pretend they aren't pregnant and I talk to them about ttc woes and then a couple of weeks later I get a 'oh I'm 12 weeks pregnant' and I feel such a dick for talking so openly about ttc and the ttc woes to them when they were pregnant all along :(

Spent most of the weekend in bed. Still bleeding and very tired. Think tiredness is from all the emotions rather than physical tiredness. dH asked when we are trying again. As soon as this bleeding leaves the building I think, although I feel dubious about another 10 months plus...

Sorry to hear that ark. But at least you can genuinely empathise with your daughter, which believe me I could have done with rather than have a mum who was positive I was still pregnant or does the 'oh well, you wouldn't have wanted a very unwell child, would you'? People just don't get it do they. I have one friend who had 5 mc and I'm disappointed in how she's been in all this... Keeps banging on about how much her daughters love one another and how sweet they are together. Breaks my heart...

Evening all. First, Wing, I am so sorry, my heart goes out to you. May nature bring you a baby soon to brighten your family a bit.

Ark, how sad for your daughter. You will be the best possible support for her, knowing how much it hurts.

Parsley, how could your friend possibly think that is a kind thing to do? I do think that until you have had a m/c you can't appreciate the devastation, but the 'mememeness' of that is unspeakable.

Chosen, that really sucks. The only reason my daughter exists is that my DH refused a posting to Dubai for 3 months straight after our honeymoon. It's the only time he has said no to anything, and I am eternally grateful.

I am considering dropping out of my favourite playgroup, because of the density of bumps and babies. They also do a prayer for all the babies in their mummies' tummies, which is like a kick in the guts every week. The boy loves it, and I love seeing my friends, but I don't think it's that healthy for my mental wellbeing.

In other news, AF has gone and it's ready, set and go go go on Project Baby to Cheer Us Up. All I want for Christmas is to conceive...

chosen that is disheartening but you could have caught the egg en route so don't despair until AF shows her ugly face.
As for next month, I guess the only 'bright side' (if you can call it that!) is that if your cycles are still a bit out of whack you might find that peak days fall elsewhere.
My cycles were like clockwork pre-MC, I'm sort of half expecting AF this week and half thinking it'll be weeks (typical pessimism!)

Yeah, my friend meant well I think, wanted to tell me before announcing it but she has an established habit of always turning things around to be all about her. (I.e. Anything you've been through she's had the same thing but much worse etc. etc.). Seems like I can't escape damn baby news at the mo!

Parsley, that is awful..people just don't seem to appreciate the enormity of a MC?

Sorry to hear about af Seaside and your daughter Arf :(

Well things haven't gone so well for us ttc this month, was thinking based on two previous post MC cycles that my cycle would be approx 33 days this month (35 and then 34 previously), used opk for first time and got peak on day DH was away and had been for three days before (makes cycle 29 days) so the only day we dtd was day after peak on opk :(

Next month if 28/29 days I will be away :( , seems like a cruel joke! X

Wow ark, what a morning. Hope your DD is ok-it's way more likely to be a coincidence than anything else, must have been quite a shock for her though.

That is super tactless of your friend parsley. It's a hectic time of year to be diving back into ttc, particularly if you're feeling shaky about it. New year, fresh slate-that's how I'm seeing it too.

Af arrived this morning-we're having Chrismas day with the in-laws today, so enjoying guilt-free fizz and smelly cheese as two fingers to her.

hello hello.
I introduced myself as a newb a few pages back but then disappeared after getting a bit frightened at the whole ttc thing.
Hopeful congrats to Alyant and hugs to everyone else who's been having a rougher time of it, esp wing.

We've not been TTC 'properly' this month (1st cycle since MMC) but have dtd a few times. I'm not convinced now that I am quite ready this month, so I think I'm going to take Xmas to re-group. 2013 has just been a big old pile of shit.

One baby bombshell so far this week (from a good friend who told me in a reply to a message I sent her telling her about the MC. Thanks for the tact! ).

Hello all - just back after a couple of weeks away (moving house).... so much has happened!

sending much love and huge hugs to everyone who's been going through a tough time.....

and quiet cheers to the bfps......

Oh Wing, you so didn't need this on top of everything else. 2013 has been a real shit of a year all round, hasn't it?

Sal, sympathies on the FB "surprise". That's got to be one of the crappier, more thoughtless ways to be informed.

My eldest daughter (21) appears to have inherited the family tendancy towards mc; she had a mc this morning - we worked out she must have been at 7 weeks. She hadn't realised she was pregnant until she started bleeding & cramping and poas on a hunch - sure enough got a bfp. Totally unplanned, but that doesn't make it any less upsetting. It's her second mc.

Devastating wing, this year has truly thrown everything at you. Hope your family pull their fingers out and help you, and you've got lots of support from OH and rl friends as well as here.

Argh Sal, can really see how some notice would have been nice there, how insensitive. This year has been the worst I can remember. I'm not superstitious, but I do think 2013 can fuck off now, it's made its point. I'm going to be so happy this new year's eve, 2014 can only be an improvement.

fedup. Glad that is over you. Hope your doing ok. Xx

wing so sorry for your loss. So sad. Take care of yourself.
cam I love your new name. I
alyant so exciting. So pleased that your time has come. Xx

I can not wait for 2014. 2013 sucked all round. Not long to wait now.

So sorry wing big hugs to you.

Glad it sounds like things have physically happened for you fedup. Enjoy the chocolate and tv, it really is a crap time.

2013 has been such a crap year for so many people in rl and on here, fingers crossed 2014 is better for us all!

I'm missing my work party tonight so very much looking forward to the 'what was wrong with you?' Question from
Those that don't know...

Also, just been emailing HR and she raised putting me on a less 'intense' project. Me being me, was like noooooo. I guess I don't want to be bored / do something noddy but at the same time should I just go with the easy stuff for a while? I don't know really. I suppose I feel the easy stuff means putting me in the weak and pathetic pile...

Fx for you fairy pants and hope the no drinking is because there is a bfp lurking!

Twins is a bit excessive I must say. However, I have this weird feeling (and DH had seperately) that we would have twins... Unless that's what I just miscarried. Who knows..

Right, time for more chocolate and crap TV.

I'm so sorry wing I hope you have a chance to properly fall apart and grieve over the next few weeks - I know I was left with all the arrangements when my mum died and bottled it all up for years which was v damaging.

Hello newbies- sorry you find yourself here. It's proper hell but better than going through it alone.

Bfn for me today on 11dpo with a 9/10 day lp so serious knicker watch! I had some cramps and spotting yesterday am but not since.
Feeling sorry for myself as everyone around me is having twins (that's just excessive!) and it is my work party tonight and still can't drink but haven't got the good news to make it worthwhile.

Cross post Fedup. Glad it was manageable, suppose its about looking after yourself and DH now. And ranting when needed!

Here is to 2014 being better for all of us. Xx

Oh wing how awful. I'm so so sorry. Very upsetting that your family have made such assumptions too. How insensitive and inconsiderate. I know they're grieving too but still... Maybe tell them gently that how they're being is not in fact ok, rather than accepting it and letting stress build up? Don't know how responsive they'd be to that?

Hope you have good support in rl, from friends and partner if not family. We're right here. . Take care of yourself. Lots of love.

That reads like it was soooo manageable! Like it was a doddle. I mean that it was manageable because it was like v bad period pain and not worse...!

wing I'm so sorry to hear about your father. It's such sad news. And for your family leaving it all to you is rubbish and heartless given their reasoning as well.
I'm totally with you 2013 being the shittest year. Can't wait for it to be over. 2014 will be a good year, it has to be!
Lots of love and hugs for you xxxx

Sorry if tmi but think have properly miscarried now. It's been like a v bad period pains, so manageable.

So sorry to hear your sad news wing how awful for you. How inconsiderate piling everything onto you as well.

I hope you have the strength and support to get through the next couple of weeks and I wish you all the luck and good wishes for the new year. Look after yourself. Xxx

oh no wing, oh no
biggest, biggest of hugs for you. I'm so, so sorry.

My dad had another stroke on Wednesday night and he died yesterday afternoon. I feel lost. This year really couldn't get any worse if it tried. I probably wont be around here for a bit as I have a funeral to organise. Apparently my sisters can't help me because they are too busy with their families and as I don't have children I have the time to do it. I'm biting my tongue at the moment, but they are going the right way for a slap.

Good luck to anyone with BFPs today and huge hugs to everyone who needs them. I'll catch up as soon as I can. Now I just want to get Christmas out of the way. I've got it into my head that once this year is over then my luck will change and everything will be ok. If I hope hard enough it'll happen, right?

I decided to take ds to soft play this morn so I can sit about whole he burns some energy. Bad move. Literally all the mums are heavily pregnant with siblings for their little ones. Man, it hurts. Really hurts. I know I'm supremely blessed / lucky to have DS but I am just desperate to give him a sibling to play with :(

Yay aly and good luck for this one.... Hope it's a sticker. I would need to conceive about now to get the same EDD as my mmc too so that's clearly not going to happen. So the twin thing officially ended so you are not going to lose this one, I just feel it! Xx

Don't congratulate me yet Aly. Today has a lot of hours left!