Posifrickentivity all round, with a good healthy dash of project desperate. New thread, new luck, new BFPs and Summer 2014 babies all round please! TTC after MC

yay handsful that's great. 3 weeks sounds reasonable - my first AF came three weeks after finally getting rid of my retained products.

9dpo today. This is the bit I hate the most of ttc. temp still high and no pre-AF symptoms, so I'll prob have one day of tentative hopefulness before my temp and my mood with it come crashing down tomorrow.... gah, I wish it was friday already

Hooray for AF handsful I think I was between 3 snd 4 weeks after my first mc. I have begun to realise there is no right, wrong, normal or even usual. Everyone's experience is so different - with just enough commonality to give us some comfort.

I reacquainted myself with WW account yesterday. There is going to be a sharp dip in takings at the work vending machines from here on in....

Sundance that sounds so frustrating, and not the best use of NHS resources. At least the scan will be giving you something in return for all the tax we pay...

Hollyben I'm so sorry you are still in the limbo we were 'joking' about over on the other thread, that really sucks. I think an OV kit sounds sensible. Any control we can have over this process is surely some comfort? I have been described as lacking gravitas at work, which as quite a high profile city solicitor delights me! Laid back would be another very pleasing bit of career feedback I think.

Daftgeranium, I was going to ask to join the AF competition but I just popped to the loo at hurray, we have proper gory blood! Is 3 weeks after passing the retained products seem too soon?

I haven't cried all day, but I have comfort eaten too much chocolate. I have rediscovered my weighwatchers account. I can't be unhappy and fat fatter!

Fingers crossed for you nerdy

Sorry to hear everyone else is having funky post mc bodies! It's reassuring but not iyswim.

I'm 4dpo and willing the next 10 days to go by!!

Wrong daftgeranium but it did raise a smile Hope all goes well with your tests

It's all just one big waiting game. Going from one wait to another. Fingers crossed we all get what we are waiting for soon

Hollyben and Sundance - sorry to hear what you're going through - I'm another who is waiting for AF 4 weeks after MMC, and also waiting for results from chromosome test (not of baby, of me and OH - to test whether Edward's Syndrome has a higher likelihood of happening again)

sending big hugs xxx. We can have an AF competition!

.... oh no, that's so wrong, especially for this board..... :/

Thanks for replying. I got my first BFN 3 weeks after (and have had a couple since in vain hope). A few days of thr bloofy CM woulf hsve been fine, but 9 dsys is just taking thr p**s in my opinion!!! Probably my body getting revenge for the years of too much alcohol and fatty foods I might make a gp apt tomorrow see what they say.

I caved today and bought some ov test on amazon. I was trying to avoid it but it felt like I was at in control for a minute or two

i must be an uncool aussie, because i've never heard "skite"!

Thanks Aly! I don't think I'll be able to resist just one or two - she's arranging a massive party (not in my honour!) on Sat. It's called 'Skite', which apparently means 'really drunk'. I thought it was an Oz word, but apparently it's just a word used by people cooler than I am...I am guaranteed to be the only even slightly sober one there! Hey ho, at least with these timings I don't miss out on Dec's shagathon dates.

hollyben ever since my mc i've had a bit of bloody cm in the lead up to AF. I never noticed it before, but perhaps I wasn't so paranoid checking closely enough.
i think it's starting to settle down now finally. it's taken a while - mc was in feb, but wasn't completely sorted until march, first af came in april.
IT must be an awful wait for you. Have you had a bfn to check that everything is cleared (or so that if you get a bfp, you know that it's real?)

seaside have a wonderful, wonderful time in oz. if I were you I think i'd be wicked and have a glass or two (but not silly amounts) of wine with my friend.

sundance that does sound frustrating, but at least they are doing something.

nerdy that's great that all the sticks seem to be aligning. I hope that they give you an early scan for free.

That is so frustrating Sundance - and when you put it like that so utterly wasteful and ridiculous! It's infuriating that the NHS plays with people's mental and physical health like that - and that it seems like such a postcode lottery as to the answers you get.

I've also heard that if you get any kind of fertility treatment, including investigative, privately it precludes you from any future help (IVF etc) on the NHS. I'm not positive about that, but it's something to ask.

Interesting to hear about baby aspirin. I forgot to ask my doc her opinion on it this morning, I'd been considering it too.

Hi all. hollyben, my mc was 4 weeks ago and still waiting for af too. I had spotting in the first couple of weeks but not now, so not much use I'm afraid, though I would say that it sounds like everything is just building back up again. Have you done a pg test to make sure all hormones have settled?

DH and I went to see GP this morning. Still no results back from the chromosome testing but I wasn't confident they would be as I know it takes weeks. As I suspected, we have to have a 3rd miscarriage before they will refer me to rmc clinic but as I had complained about pains prior to getting pg she is going to send me for a scan and or a laparoscopy if I need one, finally get to see if it's PCOS or endo. She told me not to take baby aspirin unless i had sticky blood tests as it can be dangerous.

She also basically said to just keep trying and then if I do get pg again they can run progesterone tests etc then. I find it so frustrating that the nhs will cover an ambulance call out, 2 paramedics, a nurse and a gyno to deal with my mc, but won't run a simple blood test that could be a preventive measure easily managed with a pill or injection!!

She recommended a private doctor but it's £200 just for the consultation. Think I'm just going to get the laparoscopy and hope for the best.

Hope everyone okay.

Hi all. I posted a few weks ago and have been keeping up to date on everyone else's progress. It's great to hear about the BFPs - congratulations! I had a previous mc in 2010 and was lucky to get a BFP quickly. Up until my 8 week scan I was terrified, the next 4 weeks to the dating scan slightly less terrified and extremely worried until scan at 21 weeks. Only then did I relax a bit. I have been told that I am too laid back at work so this was completely out of character but completely normal I think.

Sorry to those whose AF has arrived. I am desperately waiting for her to show. My ERPC was almost 9 weeks ago. A week ago I thought AF was on the way but all I have had is a bit of bloody CM each day. This might be normal in the run up to AF as I think if I wasn't obsessively checking I might not notice. Has anyone else had this?

Right, just catching up.

ark I'm sorry you have AF, but hopefully your cycles will settle down soon. You're still able determine when you ovulate, so that's a good thing.

triple perhaps you will end up on a longer cycle this month. What the dr said to me was that the time leading up to ovulation can vary quite a lot (as it clearly did for me) so if you haven't ovulated at your usual time it doesn't necessarily mean you won't.

seaside always good to get thing on record with the dr. That's what I did went I went last, and it did help. Hopefully you'll be able to crack on with tests.

Welcome to any new people, sorry you're joining us but you will find support here.

And congratulations to tanny!

That's good Nerdy - so excited for you. Can't wait to see those two lines! (Now I have '2 lines on the stick' in my head to the '2 lions on the short' football song tune).

That's good that you know nothing's up with DH Ark. I'm sure you're fine too, but I wanted to go to the Doc asap just so there's a record of my concern, in case I need it later. Everything takes so long with them that I wanted to give myself a head start, iykwim.

Thanks all for the reassurance.
I used the digi test today and it came up with 'pregnant' pretty quickly, then '2-3'. That works out with the dates FF gave me for ovulation as today would be 19dpo, so almost 3 weeks, and supposedly almost 5 weeks from my last period...only I didn't have it!

I will be asking for an early scan, and I'll pay for one if necessary, but it's probably at least another week and a half before anything would show up.
I'll try and hold off testing for a while now, i'm not going to get any more info from them.

He last donated sperm a couple of months ago and they check the quality each time you donate; they said everything was fine then. I haven't had any tests recently myself though. If I don't get a BFP on the this next cycle, I think it will be time to go to the GP and get things rolling.

I suspect that's the case with my body too, Ark, but we've got there before, and we can do it again. Didn't you say you were wondering if DH's swimmers are getting sleepy though, as he's 46? Have either of you had any recent tests? You're def ovulating, I remember you saying you get mittelshmerz, so that's much of the battle. Lots of it is just really really bad luck I think - there's only a 25% change of getting pg each month, so it's def possible to keep getting that 75%...

We do at least know it's something to do with me rather than DP - we already know his sperm is fine, because he's a sperm donor and they had to do loads of tests to make sure his sperm is fit, healthy & active enough and that it survives being frozen. It's just my body being crap.

Sorry about AF Ark, it just sucks every time. Well, you know what they all, constantly, unasked say: just when you're giving up, it happens. We're due lots of thread BFPs in that case - they seem to have started, so FX they keep coming.

Just had a really positive appointment at the Doc - I'm so impressed with our GP surgery. I went in to vaguely chat about 'what now, how long do I have to try before IVF etc' (2 years, then c.6 month waiting list) and she said just come in for all the tests. Got my 21 day OV bloods taken there and then, as coincidentally today's CD22, and DH is going in for sperm check. I think everything's fine, but it will be a relief to be able to rule out biological issues and that it's 'just' a matter of time. Obvs don't know what my womb's like, but it's a start. Also said my BMI's too low, so bring on the ! Feel more positive that at least we've logged concerns.

Don't know if we DTD enough/at the right time this month. I'm off to Oz tomorrow and so wish I knew if I could drink during the first week of holiday. AF due bang in the middle: am going to see BF after 1.5 years and not being able to celebrate is a right bummer! At least I'll not be dwelling on 2ww.

Nerdy - I would def get your early scan, to put your mind at ease. I'm sure everything's fine, it's totally natural to notice every fluctuation, but it will make you feel better, I'd think?

ark sorry to hear about AF and the every changing cycles. I know exactly what you mean. Everytime my 5 year old says about saving some of the toys and smaller clothes for his sibling, I force myself to carry on - otherwise would happily give up at this point too !

nerdy not quite sure where you are based, but our local hospital also has a drop in EPU where you can self-refer. If you have something like that, then you could probably just go yourself instead of having to speak to the GP first. Are you 6 weeks now? As others suggest, a private reassurance scan may be just the thing. Hope you are less anxious this morning.

thank you all for your support. just holding tight at the moment, lets see what happens with the ovulation and the cycle length. To top it all - I am away again for a family celebration for 5 days. If I will ovulate this cycle - with my luck - I am sure it will happen whilst I am away (with dh at home).

AF put in an appearance today. It looks like my cycles have started going the other way - first they got shorter and shorter until they hit 25 days, now the last one was 30 days and this one is 32.

I'd be tempted to just give up, to be honest, except this morning my 6-year-old told me again wistfully how much she'd really like to be a big sister instead of a little one (her big sisters are 21 and 19) and DP is quite keen to get trying again as soon as possible.

Not feeling too full of posifrickenivity at the moment, I must admit.

Nerdy, I have nothing to add to the above posters, just wanted to send you some moral support. I am lucky to be family friends with a scarily eminent gynaecologist who I had a chat with last night and was so utterly reassuring, saying how the chances of mmc again are really tiny, and just what bad luck it is. He also said that the Cardiff scandal in the news was down to a rogue scanner, I was really panicking about the lack of a vaginal scan for my mmc. Apparently provided its confirmed by two scanners, that's the right way to do things. I wish he could give everyone on this thread a call and answer the million questions we have, but I'm not sure what he'd think about that! I think that the least we deserve is a knowledgable and sympathetic ear to reassure and advise and do something if needed. GPs don't quite have the time, I find.

I got a negative today, 2.5 weeks after end of hideously protracted mmc. Shit, but there you go. Upwards and onwards my friends. Camomile, you hit the nail on the head, every time I've said "I'm fine thanks" today through gritted teeth I have thought fondly of you!

Hi triple my ovulation day varies by a week so don't worry just yet! Also worrying can delay ovulation or any time of illness can too. I know it's imposs not to worry but can help explain why things do get delayed.

nerdy how many weeks are you now? I would def go get an early scan or you will tear yourself up worrying and spend a fortune on sticks that can't really give you the right answers you are looking for. Had a few friends recently who symptoms stopped and they all got early scans to give them piece of mind - was £100 but you could easily spend that on sticks in no time!!