The Elderberry Pavlovas- All aboard the Berrycopter. Thread 14

I hate the landmarks too; I'm 39 in a few weeks and had hoped to have at least got pregnant by then, but it looks like I'm going to have to realign my hopes to 40 and that really is a big, horrible, scary number...

Barking - 34, ttc 21 months, bfp on clomid in aug, mc in sept. Hoping AF or bfp isn't delayed so we can start back on the clomid asap
Bunny - 33, TTC 18 months, FC says IVF is the way to go, next step lap & dye
Foodylicious -33, ttc nov 2011, mc in may, back on the ttc bus this month
Blindkitty 33, ttc for 26 months, 5+0 thanks to the wonders of iui

list
Barking - 34, ttc 21 months, bfp on clomid in aug, mc in sept. Hoping AF or bfp isn't delayed so we can start back on the clomid asap
Bunny - 33, TTC 18 months, FC says IVF is the way to go, next step lap & dye
Foodylicious -33, ttc nov 2011, mc in may, back on the ttc bus this month
Kuma - 38, ttc 9 months, GP appointment to get things moving on 24th. AF/BFP (how optimistic) due 1 Oct

Argh! Increased fertility not infertility. What am I trying to do to myself?!?!

Thanks foody that's really helpful. It would be amazing if this pg and mc sorted out my cycles and increased infertility. Fingers crossed for us both!

I might even get the old thermometer out of the drawer and resume temping.....

merk yep I am dreading christmas and birthday, just another shitty landmark! barking I know they are gonna be real tough for you too x

yorkie thunder mrs thanks ladies, I am freaking out a little bit!
sid thank you for your kind words

Welcome back foody and puppy too

Sorry it's not a proper catch up! Hello everyone!!! (make sure you add yourselves to the list like good berries )

list
Barking - 34, ttc 21 months, bfp on clomid in aug, mc in sept. Hoping AF or bfp isn't delayed so we can start back on the clomid asap
Bunny - 33, TTC 18 months, FC says IVF is the way to go, next step lap & dye
Foodylicious -33, ttc nov 2011, mc in may, back on the ttc bus this month

barking
I bled for quite a while after mc, cant really remember now (amazing how you can forget some bits) but it was for a few weeks. DTD was weird to be honest, I was desperate to start ttc strait after too, but we agreed to wait until after the hols (though i think the first couple of times were then unprotected as I was all a bit screwy in deciding what to do!)
I really just wanted to get that first time out of the way and feel 'normal', shed a few tears after and actually burst into tears during on another occasion, but don't let this put you off! I have since had times when I have been properly 'up for it' .
Physically it was ok down there (i was 8wks at time of mc).
Thankfully my OH has been great, bit of a shock for him going from me demanding we DTD all the time to an almost complete ban from BFP onwards!
Its really tough, in some ways I am glad we have had to wait a few months so I can recover a bit, but in others I think being able to get on with it earlier would have helped me move forward.

On a positive note, after 17 months of ttc and figuring out that i had not been ovulating when i should have been and had short lp, used B6 and got pg that month. whilst that did not last, the first cycle after I stopped bleeding was a textbook cycle with me ov'ing when I should, so I really do think there probably is something in what people say about being regulated better after a mc and fertility being increased.

Most of all be gentle on yourself and be really open with DP, don't keep it to yourself and if when 'preparing' to dtd you suddenly don't feel up to, just stop and say so, its F frustrating as you just want to get on with it, but really don't put yourself through anymore trauma.

I thought about having a few wines to get me in the mood, but figured I would get too emotional.

There is a really fine line between figuring out what is right for you and not over-thinking everything I think.
I have not found this line yet!! .

Crikey, just got in and loads to read.....

Did somebody say list?!?

Barking - 34, ttc 21 months, bfp on clomid in aug, mc in sept. Hoping AF or bfp isn't delayed so we can start back on the clomid asap
Bunny - 33, TTC 18 months, FC says IVF is the way to go, next step lap & dye

Hey foody was thinking about you and how you were doing. So good to see you . I'm assuming you meant 'now' on with ttc rather than 'not'?! I'm desperate to get pg again so I will be ignoring the advice to wait until I get my first AF given it's only dating it that they're worried about. Do you mind me asking how it was the first time you dtd post mc? I've been bleeding for 12 days (first day without a sanitary towel today!) and was in a lot of discomfort for the first 7 days so I'm feeling weird both physically and emotionally about dtd but my desire to get pg is overriding my iffyness! Planning on jumping DP when he gets back from work tomorrow if I can pluck up the courage .

I don't know about referrals and mc, we were supposed to be moving to the ivf waiting list in December, but I don't know if our mc will mean that won't happen. I'm currently choosing to bury my head in the sand and see if an appointment letter arrives in a couple of months....

Merk thank you so much for that, it's exactly what I was thinking. I'll just wait for my 'obvious' AF bleed and take the clomid for 5 days from then. Can't do any harm as that seems to be how it's prescribed in America anyway.

Hey kuma

We definitely need a new list, I was pg on the last one .

Barking, 34, ttc 21 months, bfp on clomid in aug, mc in sept. Hoping AF or bfp isn't delayed so we can start back on the clomid asap.

hi all, just checking in!

barking v v sorry to hear your news.
Congrats on the other bfps! lovely twins news too!

we hav decided on mid Oct for our ivf cycle. hoping it will fit round a holiday we have booked. Will mean by xmas I will have a lovely xmas present or a good excuse to eat my own weight in chocs and guzzle festive wine!

af due sat or sun here so another 2ww almost done!

loving the ever increasing 'im pregnant threads' which go on to say they have no womb and havent even had sex but are still pregnant!

• stop opening them!

ill swing by next week on cd1!

foody welcome back. Your holiday sounds fab. Feeling string makes me think of Bridget Jones' blue string soup!

RP good luck with the wait till tomorrow morning; I hope you've something fun to do to occupy your mind tonight!

MrsW Its amazing how unsympathetic doctors can be sometimes; I remember going to my GP when in my early 20s and at the end of the appointment he asked me if I wanted something to treat my acne so I could restore my natural beauty. Both cheesy and tactless!

Generally feeling a bit blue today, so lounging on the SoP with ice cream. Have only managed to DTD 3 times this month and DH now away for a week. Also have a hunch that a friend might be pregnant so I'm trying to stop myself feeling ... its hard though.

Foody welcome back. I had a bit of a snort at you feeling string!! Glad you are feeling stronger
The master of the list will appear shortly and will be happy to oblige.... bunny???!

strong, not string, ha ha

Hello peeps!

Finally feeling string enough to get back on here.

Am having a bit of trouble catching up though, blimey you guys are chatty! All good though and there really is no support the same as what you guys give each other here.

So we had our big holiday in oz and thailand, it was amazing, but sadly much of it overshadowed by the mc end of May, with me having far too many moments of "I should be ....weeks now" and that kind of thing. I will admit I did take full advantage of being able to drink and go on a couple of speed boats etc, but you know you take the good bits where you can.
Soooo this means we are not back on with TTC, after much fretting and trauma on my part as to whether i would ever be ready to start again. Kept thinking I just don't think I am going to be able to get past what happened and worried if I will break myself (and us) completely if it were to happen again.

Seems for me though that that was keeping me stuck. making the decision to start ttc again is terrifying but i feel so much 'lighter' somehow since we first DTD unguarded a few days ago.

So already have unrealistic expectations that we will be upduffed immediately despite the fact it took us 18 months to get there last time.

Really not sure whether to go back to gp about fertility referal as was on waiting list when got pg last time - will they consider that i managed to get pg as a reason not to see us?? so confused and have been avoiding seeing my gp cause I have been such an emotional wreck (did think about some sort of councelling, but kind of in denial).

[barking] I am so sorry to hear your news, it is truly, truly awful. I know I an sadly not the only one on here with experience of this too, but if you want to pm me please do, about anything at all - might not be able to help, but can give it a go! massive hugs.

Also guys, I am a pain but have you had a list lately??

Eek merk trying not to get hopes up........

RP a line is a line. You are going to have the looooooongest wait til tomorrow morning for FMU to test again but the prof reckons it'll be a bfp

Barking as I understand it your choices are;
Take clomid at the first sign of spotting at the risk of being pregnant and not knowing
Take clomid from day 5 onwards
Don't take clomid on next AF and have a natural cycle

Quite frankly the bottom option is rubbish, you don't want to run the risk of the top option so you're left with the middle one. Which seems a good plan to me, without risk and in line with an approved way to take clomid.
That would be my decision anyway

rp hmm I'm not sure then. You defo need to poas tomorrow morning though! Oh, and I don't have any symptoms yet, other than occasional spotting (if that counts?)

Try again tomorrow morning RP

I'm doing First Response. There's like an oval window and one dark line and one faint ghost line equally spaced apart from each other. That ghost line got the teensiest bit darker as time went on but then I've just seen on their site you shouldn't leave it more than 10 min which I did.

I think I'm just going to put it out of my mind and try tomorrow with FMU. Thank you all for that tip! I still don't feel at all pg and am fairly sure AF will come tomorrow.

Where on the strip is it? Is it just after the control line? Are you doing an ic?

Okay I just got home and poas before seeing the comments here. It is BFN but there is, like, the ghost of a second line. As though you could see where a second line would be if that makes sense?

DH reckons it is just cos the absorbent material of the stick is damp so it is a little darker. I think he is probably right.....?

rp I'd use fmu. How many dpo are you? Are you confident about your ov date? Just thinking about you not bring sure about your bbt charts? Maybe the woman was a secret fortune teller!

barking bet it's not that bad but you could just get a dominos if all else fails?

funky mrs walker re midwives - how funny was the woman who thought she'd had a boy til she realised she'd been looking at the umbilical cord haha!

Yep RP, you need to use FMU! (first morning urine).
Maybe the strange woman at work is right?

I was supposed to be cooking a lovely dinner for DP and then going for a gentle run with a friend. I've not been able to exercise properly since getting pg as I was too exhausted, and now the mc, as I'm too weak and exhausted . All I've done however is fall asleep on the sofa, woken up too late to run and cooked a really nasty looking meal for DP because I didn't have half the stuff I wanted for what I intended to make and I made it up instead. It looks nasty and I don't want to eat it myself...

MrsWalker that is right up there with the doctor who said she thought I had mental health issues because DH and I don't have 'enough' penetrative sex. She wanted to refer me for counselling. Holy fuck....

Anyhow, AF still not here and I am two days 'late'. merk I did pee on a stick on Monday (day I would normally get my period) and had a BFN.

I was thinking I might POAS again tonight but then my colleague who has DC said, don't do it in the evening. It's more likely to be picked up in the morning. Is that right?

I also had a rather freaky occurrence this morning. The cleaner at work walked straight up to me and said 'You are impregnate?' (English not her first language.

Me: Er, sorry?

Her: Sorry, I mean, you are pregnant.

Me: Er... I don't think so. Just fat, ha ha.

Her: Oh right. I thought you look pregnant.

Weird, eh