Legs in the air.

Nor should you.

Of course there are things I feel guilty about... I'm a human being, but letting a man use me for convenient sex is not one of them because I can promise you he is just as eager as I am... I'm not going to come on here and say sorry for being broody... xx

IF he is married then he should wear a condom. IF there is a baby then it shouldn't really come as a surprise seeing as he hasn't ever discussed contraception

6 of one and half a dozen of the other as my nan used to say.

I try not to judge people, only behaviour.

Right near the beginning I think you said you do not feel any guilt. Is that any guilt about anything you do?

Hi RaRaz. Would I have told the O.N.S if I hadn't lost the baby.... Honestly I'm not really sure...
My D.D's conception... I met him in a pub on a Tuesday night. We went on the Friday dtd, but decided we weren't suited... I don't think I suit anyone! The mold was certainly broken when I was made. I can tell you. I didn't tell him about D.D. I had my reasons. xx
HiYamsareyummy. My childhood was fine thank you. Let's not get too personal. My life is nothing like yours, so. You struggle to understand Well I do apologise but we can't all be perfect!. xx

Realistically, he probably is married.

You are afraid to ask too many questions. You probably dont want to know at this point.

I have to say it is nothing like my life, so I struggle to understand.

My guess is that your childhood wasnt straightforward?

You are sure in an 'interesting' situation, International. I don't like what you're doing (as I've said - I don't mean to go on about it), but I find it interesting. I'm ttc atm and it hasn't worked instaneously. As I had a mc before this, I'm struggling and taking herbal ADs. I can kinda understand a person's desperation to conceive, though I wouldn't be so arrogant to compare myself to people who have tried and failed for years. So I guess I'm trying to say I can kinda see your reasons though I would never go with your method.

Can I ask:

Would you have told the ONS if you hadn't lost the baby?

Was your DD conceived with a ONS/FWB?

How old are you?

Goes without saying - I hope - that you don't have to answer those. My nosiness is my problem! I sure envy your fertility though - it sounds like you've got pg exactly when you've wanted to so far.

Hi Yamsareyummy. I already have a D.D and she was not a replacement for the baby I lost, as I believe life is so precious that it can't be replaced.
I only became broody in March and I started trying in April. It (broodiness) just came from nowhere. There was a time when I was thinking about sterillisation and my friend said "No, don't because you might wake up broody and not know why, and it seems she was right! xx
Do I like him.... I certainly can't say i dislike him, but I doubt we'll ever get married, but as the saying goes never say never
Does he like me.... Well he does at the time.. I'm sure you get my meaning
He was initially O.N.S but he asked for my number and we see each other twice a week.
His he married.... Well I honestly don't know that do I... xx

I was actually wondering if I should be putting my legs in the air so glad to see it makes no difference

Started ttc a few weeks ago and still getting used to the mess - I like Writerwannabe83s idea of using DPs pillow and swapping it so I might have to try it

I think I will ask it now.
Being gentle, do you think you are doing all this to replace the little girl that you miscarried?
[I realise that may be too hard a question to answer].

Yes, so it was. Sorry international.

I do have other questions actually though.
I was wondering
do you like him
does he like you
is he married
did you know him before you started the weds and fris

You dont have to answer those.
Actually I have one more after that, if you are ok with it.

Hi Yamsareyummy. I'm glad you found out all you wanted to know, but to defend myself it was another poster that mentioned about what I am doing on the Chat thread. xx

Hi international, found you from hte other thread.
I see that soem of the questions have already been answered.

I suppose I am curious above all.
Curious that you are talking about it on 2 threads. Amd I wonder why.
I dont agree with a poster on here who said that MN would be shocked. I could be wrong, but I dont find MN that shockable.

I think, and I could be wrong, that you do feel guilty.
Or it could be a case of a bit of attention seeking, saying it on MN.

I wasnt sure, from what you have already written, and I do not get all the acronyms on this thread, if your DD was conceived in this way as well?

These are not the original questions I was going to ask, but never mind.

Thank you. It was a while ago now, but there's not a day goes by when I don't think of her. I know it was a girl I had dream about her when she came and kissed me on the cheek. I instinctivley knew it was her. I woke up with a tear running down my face. I feel like she's with me all the time anyway. xx

The baby I concieved through the O.N.S ended in a m/c at 6 weeks or if you prefer 4 weeks conception.
And my existing D.D dad doesn't know about her. I had my reasons, and my daughter is fine.. xx

Hi IronbruTheNoo. Thank you for you kind none judgemental words. xx
Hi Winterwannabe 83. I didn't tell him. xx

Loads of women go out to get pregnant from ONS, especially women who are in their late 30s, or early 40s... International is not alone here....especially when time's of the essence and you've not found the right partner and your biological clock's ticking away. You'd do it with a tree if it got you pregnant, I'm sure. Who wouldn't. Once you're no longer fertile you don't get the choice at all. Think of it on these terms...

It's a bit harsh to be judging, tbh. Until you've been in her position it is not right to cast stones. I personally wouldn't do it, I'd probably adopt or foster children, but each to their own. We all make our own choices and have good reasons for them.

I did the legs above head on the bathroom floor when ttc ds df used to look at me like i was kooky if I did it in bed! We fell within weeks with him but I blame df's super sperm for that seeing as we weren't trying for dd2 and I still fell

Yes I did intend to fall pregnant from the O.N.S. xxx

Writer : I love it! Given me a good grin after a very long shift!

International : That's a fair point, and actually I agree - you ARE very much allowed on these threads. I was wondering why you brought up that particular contentious issue when you must've known you'd get some pretty strong opinions on it and when you clearly don't want to hear them, rather than questioning your presence on, or use of, Mumsnet as a whole.

I don't think you're not deserving of falling pg because you are not with a DP/DH; my problem is with the DECEIT rather than the lack of a stable relationship. Out of interest though, did you intend to fall pg from the ONS?