We will try anything! The big fat posifrickintivity thread of TTC after MC

fuck knows!

of course seaside it's not good that you're here instead of being up the duff, but you knew what I meant, right?

wine in the sunshine might have gone to my head

oh saggy what?!?!?
could be implantation? 7 days is a LOT early

DDMF i'm sorry about your temp going down, I know just what you mean about clutching at straws. Even after AF leaves I usually think, ooh, maybe it was just a implantation bleed. Stupid.
missmakes i know you don't need any encouragement for hopeful thinking, but if you dtd the day before your positive ov signal you really do have a chance.
good to see you back seaside

i've had a lovely day hanging out with friends, including a few preggos. Everytime I see them and their bumps are bigger it's like a kick in the guts. But then i try and forget about it and just have a good time. A few glasses of wine helped with that.

today i got a faint band on my opk, right on schedule. guessing that tomorrow will be even stronger. not sure whether to do the 3 nights in a row that smep calls for from tonight or tomorrow night. but tonight is meant to be on anyway, so i guess it's academic. we'll go for as many nights as we can! prob just one

NO saggy! Awful cross post timing, sorry! Not implantation? Argh, fucking fuck.

Looking forward to it saggy - your shagathon this month has been monumentally impressive, particularly after 12 hour working days! All fx that your...hard work...is productive.

I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that I am definitely not in tune with my body. I've been sure I have all the symptoms, then AF swoops in on her broomstick. Even the 'boobrometer' has let me down. Was positive they were bigger, but no. The time I was pg they grew noticeably (they've got a lot of catching up to do!) so that was my failsafe clue, and not even that's reliable any more. So I'm just giving up, and trying to look forward to having a glass of wine to cry into ...

FFS! I'm spotting. A fucking whole SEVEN DAYS EARLY!

Well, my temperature took a bit of a nosedive this morning, so AF will be here tonight or tomorrow Cried like a baby. Then put on a happy face and went to the naming ceremony, which was lovely and not at all full of pregnant people

missmakes, re. googling the sperm survival, that little teeny tiny minuscule hope is such a killer, isn't it?

I am exactly the same. My BBT has dropped below the coverline, a sure sign that AF is imminent, but some small part of me is still thinking 'yes, but maybe, just maybe....'.

It seems that no matter what glaring, klaxon-blowing NOT PREGNANT signs I get, no matter how hard my head is saying 'not this month', a little piece of my heart is always whispering 'maybe...'.

I am an optimist though, which is good I suppose. It's a bloody rollercoaster. My BBT has dropped, but I do have wine. Hoorah!

Ill be POAS with you Seaside.
I've been working today. The thermometer in my van said 35 degrees!!!
Just once, for a tiny wee moment, I was relieved that I wasn't 7 months PG today in the awful heat. Then I felt really bad for thinking that!

Hi everyone, so my two month Not Trying is over and we've had one round of TTC again, in the evil 2ww now. Been catching up with everyone's posts over the last few days - what a busy thread!

Fab to read the great news, and heartbroken for those who have gone and returned since I left. So so sorry.

Those talking about acupuncture - I've been at it for a few months now. Crucifyingly expensive, but she's said to be a miracle worker, so fingers crossed - and I'm feeling much calmer now, whether as a result of her work I don't know.

It's been really poignant reading posts from those of you who've been through ectopics - over and badhair (sorry if I've missed anyone on this huge deal). Emotionally, I started collapsing after a couple of months TTC again; I think it was only then that it hit me what I'd lost, and that it would be harder to get it back minus a tube. So comforting to read that 30% of pregnancies happened from the tubeless ovary though, thank you.

So, it's POAS day on Friday. I'm not expecting anything, though we have been at it during the appropriate times this month, so it's theoretically possible. I had pains on the left side though at ovulation time, which is the side I lost the tube on, so I'm thinking it's unlikely. I'm away for a long weekend though, so I'm holding on to the fact that I'll be able to drink for it! I've been off the booze since end of last AF, and DH has sooo kindly joined me on my booze-free time. Misery loves company and all that. So, basically, gagging for a ! to you all for being here, for what you've all been through, what we're all going through, and for being so great and supportive.

Just checking in, sorry to hear no other good news since Guff...I am feeling ok now my 'window' is gone and we defo haven't DTD during it - how sad is this though, we did 5 days before I got a positive OPK and I then started googling sperm survival rates! I am actually a loony.

I agree with the pregnant people everywhere thing saggy just found out someone is at my work, she is 20 weeks and has kept it quiet till now. I don't think it has been easy for her reading between the lines, so I am happy for her of course but still have that jealousy in the back of my mind, my heart sinks when I think about seeing her at work everyday with a bump.

I am just focussing on the positive (hollow laugh) like being able to drink myself silly at the weekends and during the week if I can cope with a tiny hangover whilst teaching and being able to diet like crazy to lose a few more pounds, plus not having the stress of the 2ww, if we keep on avoiding the fertile days. Bloody difficult though, hormones being what they are that is all I want to do!

I agree with the moodiness, I am fuming the majority of the time it feels like. I wish someone could give me a pill to stop me thinking about it.

Flower, sorry about AF!
Over, HCG falls at roughly the same speed as it rises, so halviing every 2 days or so. Itll be down really quickly. {{hug}}
MrsFinch its not over till the aunty flows!
I have been working at a food festival today. There have been PG people EVERYWHERE! Tonnes of twins and huge bumps everywhere. Sometimes I hate my job!

Oh, flower, sorry AF got you. Enjoy your vino, onwards and upwards, and all that. I am dreading the arrival of AF, 15DPO today, or maybe 14, and no pregnancy symptoms spotted. But haven't the guts to do an HPT (and none in the house).

Yeah floweroct, that's the spirit! All of us with AF visiting should make the most of it tonight and party - I'll join in with you

Hormones..,what's the deal post MC?! I seem to only be 'ok' in the fertile window...otherwise I'm a miserable ol cow! Can't work out if cd 1-7 ish I'm anxious about ttc, then go for it and then this 2ww I'm like a bear with a sore head! Really snappy and low.

I don't remember feeling this bad before MC. And I'm absolutely boiling. Can't sleep beyond 4am either. Bleurgh.

Yes, hurrah for your negative blood test Penguin.

Boo to bfns yesterday.

Kat i laughed about your DH being a hero to us for lying back being waited on and getting no effort lovin'!

Hope everyone has a nice weekend

Over sorry you're feeling so low all the ladies on here have given you some great advice.

Well no need for me to poas today af finally arrived yesterday evening - gutted!! So tonight I am mostly going to get drunk!!

Hi over
I was pretty similar (not the ectopic part but I have one dc and had a MMC and erpc) and felt horrific afterwards. So down and felt life was shit. OH didnt undrstand as we have a lovely child and great marriage, so what was my problem? It's the disappointment, the fear, and hormones raging round your body to name just a few. I was (and still am) desperate to be preggers again. And I did ttc straight away (well two weeks after op as suggested) but my body is taking time to recover I think. But the fear is still there and so many new babies and pregnancies in my face make it hard to deal with. I have 4 friends with babies due within a week of my EDD, which is rapidly approaching.

I think it's ok to feel like you do. So don't worry about those feelings and having a good cry (I do even now) is therapeutic. I don't think I cried enough at the time. Noone thinks you are ungrateful for what you have. I felt / feel the same and feel guilty for feeling like that.
I would do what you feel is right re ttc from what you can cope with emotionally.

Big hugs xxxxx

Over, sorry you've been feeling bad, glad you got such great supportive replies.

If it helps I relate to feeling guilt. I adore my DS but, for me, the terrible truth is right now he's not always enough to stop me feeling bad. Once he was my entire world and all I needed so feeling depressed feels like a terrible betrayal as his mother.

I cling on to the knowledge that these feelings will ease and I will feel happy about life again. Already i feel better than a week ago. You've got a bigger physical recovery but you too will start to have brighter days.

Definitely be nice to yourself. When i felt like moping i got new pjs, a beautiful new soft blanket and made the most of lying around. Being outdoors over the last week has been great for lifting my mood.

I hope today is better xxx

Hooray for penguin gettin the all clear

Oh over I hope you've woken up feeling a bit better this morning.
Try and do nice things if you can his weekend and make sure dh and dd spoil you rotten.

over, so sorry you are having a tough day today. The NEED to be pregnant ASAP really resonates with me. It was all consuming in the early days. But, after the first post-MC AF was out of the way, that feeling reduced a bit. It is still such early days for you, and you have been through such a lot - give yourself some time. Things will get easier

Yeah - it took me a while to wear jeans again cos the button used to rub me. I felt bruised and tender for a while but I was so much worse after my C Section that I felt the physical recovery was quite quick. My baby used to kick me in the stomach, which wrecked but it got better soon. I was in the most pain from having an ulcerated throat after having the breathing tube pulled out, to be honest. I never actually knew my hgc levels but after two nights in hospital, was told they had come 'right down'. They came down quickly after my miscarriage too, which was a natural one. Ectopic was at 7 or 8 weeks and miscarriage at 6 weeks. Unless you have any other complications I'm sure the doc will say you can try again as soon as you've had your first period. Fingers crossed for you. Some of the ladies on the Ectopic board conceived within 3 months, you know. Don't lose hope! I never phoned anybody at the Ectopic Trust but apparently they are really helpful and know alot more than the doctors. Maybe you could give them a ring?

badhair Blood test is a good idea, to give me some idea of where I am at. I'm not too fussed about the scars (not the physical ones anyway!) my belly button was already scarred from a belly button piercing...they are still quite sore though. Everything I've read seems to suggest that the soreness/pain dissappears within a few days, but I am still quite bruised and definitely very aware of my scars to the touch - were you the same? x

You are all so lovely, thank you. I knew talking to some of you on here would make me feel better.

kat You are right I do need to clarify the TTC again with my Dr, patience will be hard but it is definitely needed. Thanks for the much needed hugs and kind words. x

badhair Thank you for your really helpful post, I totally get what you're saying about Dr's not knowing all that much about ectopic, it's not as easy to find clear information either. I will PM you if I think of anything I could do with a chat about. x

omama It's horrible, isn't it? I don't want to tell anybody the truth about how I feel/what I'm going through, but equally hate putting on the smiley face and spouting the "Ohh hopefully soon, next year etc etc" I actually just feel like screaming at them! I am glad that you are physically starting to feel better, teary days are good as it means you are not bottling it all up. I felt that I started to feel much better once the bleeding had all stopped after my first MC. x

misspositiv Thank you for your truly lovely post, I have just peeked at my sleeping beauty and had a little smile remembering that I have carried and birthed a healthy baby once, I pray/hope that I can do it again...x

penguin Yes I have read that about the tubeless side/egg, seems bizarre and almost unbelievable but I suppose it is an extra glimmer of hope. for you for finally being discharged, and the start of your next journey...wishing you lots of luck. x