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Conception

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The Genuine BESH Palais. To misquote Carlsberg, we're probably the barrenest TTC-ers in the world...

984 replies

HesterShaw · 19/04/2013 22:18

We are Barren. We are Evil, on account of having left procreating until our 30s. We are Selfish, thinking only of careers and money and cars and holidays. And lastly, we are Hags. Welcome to the BESH gin palace. Babydusters and instadiffers need not apply.

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DolomitesDonkey · 21/04/2013 17:58

Millionaire trousers also attract gazillionaires. Friend of ours used to wear red jeans. Not a great look for a middle-aged computer programmer. Met a 40 year old virgin online and married her. One of the richest families in the country. The git. I did Internet dating and landed a pauper. In normal trousers.

lovesLemonDrizzleCake · 21/04/2013 17:52

Where do I sign up for sainthood? This weekend I assembled a crib for a very diffed friend, bought and sent two new-babies presents and have just been to visit the newest arrival born to two lesbian friends of ours.

Welcome noks. I missed your sneaking and might hunt your beshtionaire but not yet. I am lemon, was in the far east enjoying raw fish and alcohol for much of the last month, have been TTC forever (3yrs in June), unexplained, got diffed last summer from SO+IUI, mc in Sept. Been waiting increasingly frustrated since then.

Enjoy it faif. Sounds bliss. Btw, the baybee we saw today was only 10 days old and the mums did look like truck had run over them. The little boy looked totally at peace. So even if all goes really well, this period seems hard work.

HadALittleFaithBaby · 20/04/2013 20:57

So sorry euro, missed that you'd had a sechs fail. Hang in there.

I'm just watching more Pride and prejudice (which I started watching last week!) while having snuggles.

Nokkie73 · 20/04/2013 18:01

euro well make sure you take care of yourself and have a good trip. At least you have someone outside of work you can hang about with. Make sure you drink beer too. Sorry about the sechs fail too. It will get better. X

dot that's a fucking brilliant name for those trousers. They have SO much cash, they literally couldn't give a rats crap about looking like a total twat.

drizz I did sneak in. I did the questionnaire and everything. Where did you go on hollibobs ? I love a good one, me. Shame I have no money to go on one though. Poor fucking me. Grin

bugs I gave that a miss he other day as it sounded a bit tame from the description. I was clearly misled. Do share with the group !

Noks xx

JustplainoldBuggerlugs · 20/04/2013 17:45

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This post has been withdrawn due to privacy concerns.

HadALittleFaithBaby · 20/04/2013 16:31

Must be the beer euro. Now the deadline is done (well done by the way!) I prescribe regular intake along with the sechs.

Life here is very strange, trying to establish a routine. Faithlet is beautiful but very hard work! BF is going well and the MW who saw her today was happy with her progress :)

lovesLemonDrizzleCake · 20/04/2013 14:51

Nice new fred, hags! Well done hes.

Beer you say euro. Well that is on the list then. About to join SB and some friends in a beer garden so I shall partake of some. Lovely weather here and it is weekend! So sorry about the fail, and no sechsing since pre-MC that is shit. It took us a little while to get back on the horse afters...

Waves at the others! Noks did you arrive while I was gone to the fabuloustest hols in a long while?

Congrats on escaping the clutches of the hossie, faif.

FriendofDorothy · 20/04/2013 13:58

In my family we call brightly coloured trousers 'millionaire trousers' as that seems to be what rich old men wear.

EuroShaggleton · 20/04/2013 13:07

Nowhere that exotic, noks - just the mothership office in the US. But one of the lovely 10+ers lives in the city I'm going to, so we are meeting up tomorrow. This'll be our third meeting now.

Ronnie Scotts sounds ace. You'll have to do a stupid trouser tally and report back.

hest how are you doing today?

We had another sechsfail this morning, so my first EWCM in two years won't get us anywhere. That's our third in a row and means we haven't dtd since pre-mc. This has never happened before. Unfortunately, that means no chance of an FCFU and we're back in the hands of the clinic. :( I was horny as hell too.

Nokkie73 · 20/04/2013 12:29

euro it's definitely beer. Where is it this time then ? Somewhere nice and hot and exotic ? I am glad you have been given the go-ahead, even though your appointment sounded like a colossal waste of time. You feeling a bit more chilled hungover ?

hest how are you ? I was sorry to hear of your woes love. X

cap'n you old drunken sea um....well the next word here is dog, but that's a bit rude, even for a potty mouthed harridan like my good self. I bet you have a hangover this morning Grin.

Moons at everyone else.

I cannot believe what a lovely day it is today. Normally the weather is a bag of shit, so this makes a nice change. I am going to Ronnie Scott's tomorrow for Ma Noks' birthday. Skee dap diddly bap baps and jazz hands all round. The last time I went, I have never seen so many stupidly coloured trousers on so many old people in one room in my life. The music was ace though.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn · 20/04/2013 08:38
EuroShaggleton · 20/04/2013 08:11

Morning hags!

Today is very eggciting. I had my first string of EWCM today in about two years. Maybe the mc has reset something. Or maybe not trying last month has helped me to relax.... (so clearly it is bound to happen now). Either that or it was beer. I had beer last night, for the first time in AGES.

Right, better go and pack.

FriendofDorothy · 20/04/2013 08:07
CaptainMoll · 20/04/2013 01:00

Me? Nope.

Nokkie73 · 20/04/2013 00:18

Has the captain been a naughty seadweller Grin ?

CaptainMoll · 20/04/2013 00:15

Bubbles..
Grin

Nokkie73 · 19/04/2013 23:59

faif forgot to say congrats on the sproggins. Hope all is well with you both. Xx

cap'n wossin your pipe ?

HadALittleFaithBaby · 19/04/2013 23:52

vairy naice new home laydees.

CaptainMoll · 19/04/2013 23:49

Evenin' 'ags

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn · 19/04/2013 23:30

Lee Mack was a stable lad at Ginger McCain's yard and sat on Red Rum

The thread is odd and has strangely angered me. Someone has found an online clairvoyant who will predict for you when you will conceive, and take £5 off you in the process. I just think it's a blatant exploitation of emotionally vulnerable women.

Nokkie73 · 19/04/2013 23:25

I think lee mack is quite fit. I confessed this to my friends and they basically paraded me through the streets shouting 'unclean.....unclean'.

HesterShaw · 19/04/2013 23:19

He's a comedian! He's funny and I think sexy in a weird way but his sitcom is so to curlingly bad, I can't forgive him it.

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evilgiraffe · 19/04/2013 23:05

I've not seen the thread, but it sounds hilarious.

Mo Farah is one of my personal sporting heroes - such a huge talent and such a nice guy! Who the fuck is Lee Mack?

HesterShaw · 19/04/2013 22:46

Conception prediction? I don't like the way this is sounding....

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HesterShaw · 19/04/2013 22:46

Sorry my love hag.

I am watching Graham Norton. Mo Farrah sat between Lee Mack and Gwyneth Paltrow. I love this show. Mo has barely heard of Gwynnie, let alone Lee Mack. He spends all his day running.

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