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Conception

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Original poster

The Genuine BESH Palais. To misquote Carlsberg, we're probably the barrenest TTC-ers in the world...

984 replies

HesterShaw · 19/04/2013 22:18

We are Barren. We are Evil, on account of having left procreating until our 30s. We are Selfish, thinking only of careers and money and cars and holidays. And lastly, we are Hags. Welcome to the BESH gin palace. Babydusters and instadiffers need not apply.

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EuroShaggleton · 29/04/2013 22:18

Oh. That tugged at my heartstring. :(

TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 22:18

I think Empty Arm was about right. Most people on here use one arm for the baybee and the other for MNing.

Ryan Air charged me shed loads of money for being a tiny bit over the weight limit - every other fuckers gives you a 20kg limit, not them, oh no, but I assumed - then I had a fly-for-free, weighed a shitload more than my baggage 'excess' toddler next to me, pulling my hair and climbing on me for the duration of the flight Angry

Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 22:11

Empty ArmS that should be.

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Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 22:11

I am officially Up and Down, Euro.

I want a baybeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee to hold and cuddle. I have Empty Arm Syndrome.

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EuroShaggleton · 29/04/2013 22:09

They are definitely cunts. But they are the only cunts who fly direct from the UK to the airport that is a 20 min drive from the PIL's place, so we use them whenever we go there. As long as you obey the stupid rules, it's fine.

Hest you emerged! How are you doing? That is enormously shit, hest. I've heard a lot of similar stories and more worryingly stuff about them sailing close to the wind in terms of fuel on board. But, I'll sacrifice a lot for convenience.

draf what a strange incident. I don't blame you for carrying the epipen!

Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 22:05

We were five minutes late for check in once when flying back from some obscure shithole in France. Even though I could pretty much touch the queue the other side of the gate, they wouldn't let us on. We have to pay £400 extra to fly back to another airport in the UK, hire a car to drive back to the airport we had flown from in order to pick up our car.

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evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 22:03

Euro, it wasn't too scary at the time, to be honest, but then oxygen deprivation will do that to you. HOTB really should have called an ambulance, especially as the fuckwit GP later dismissed it as hayfever... Allergy specialist had no doubts, though! My epipen is now out of date and because there's no obvious cause I'm not allowed to get a replacement, but I still carry it with me everywhere just in case. It's far more frightening after the fact - for months whenever my heart rate went up I got very worried, but have mostly got over it now :)

Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 22:03

Ryan Air are cunts.

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evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 21:59

Sailing scares the shit out of me. It's fine once you get going, but the first setting up sails flappy bit frightens me half to death. I have no idea why. I really should get HOTB to sell our boat, I doubt we're ever going to really use it...

And YAY Star Trek, Twinks! On those lines - thanks for the link, Frank! Did you see the gorgeous Chris Pine/Karl Urban red carpet hug at the Australian premiere? They are two smiley gorgeous fuckers

TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 21:58

Fanks euro! Hurrah indeed!!

TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 21:57

I boycott RyanAir. They are properly on my shitlist. We're flying SleazyJet to Nice when we go, and I too would like clothing tips. Although I don't do shorts, for the greater good.

EuroShaggleton · 29/04/2013 21:56

Hurrah for a helpful trial date twinks!

EuroShaggleton · 29/04/2013 21:55

rasp you've just reminded me that you were down in that part of the world recently. We're flying crap ryanair, so need to pack light. What was the weather like? Shorts in the day, cardigans in the evening? I have been in May before but not for a couple of years.

Draf that must have given you quite a scare! I am not a natural runner and have to be careful of an old knee injury, but I quite enjoy it once I get going. The first run after a break is always the worst though. I'm dreading that one.

Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 21:54

I think you have hit the nail on the head.

Running is boring.

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TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 21:53

Changing the subject a bit - ok, completely - I had a hearing the other day, the trial is definitely starting on the Monday and judge has decreed we have 2 days so I WILL be seeing Star Trek in the Imax on its release day Grin

Nokkie73 · 29/04/2013 21:46

rasp I wouldn't want to rain on MATV's parade at all but if you wanted me to help you with the data protection bit, I would be more than happy to help if you need it. X

frank cheers for that. I shall investigate it. Sounds like just the sort of thing I need to keep me interested in running because, it's fundamentally fucking dull. Good for shifting the blubber though, I admit.

raff sounds like you have really done well my love !

TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 21:45

Sailing is good for weight loss. For me. Because every time I go near a boat - except a river rowing boat, oddly - I empty my stomach Hmm

Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 21:44

Hugh Jackman is slaying vampires on ITV2. Can we have a Hugh Jackman fred?

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Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 21:43

Yes exactly. When I run, after a while I feel like my bowels are going to fall out of my arse, and I wheeze. It's silly because in terms of long term fitness, I have always been fit and strong. I think I did so much in my youth that I have good stores!

"Disguised exercise" - good term. PLaying football with nephews and nieces, cycling, sailing....that kind of thing.

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TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 21:40

I kind of feel like that about running too. I much prefer 'disguised' exercise, like iceskating, horseriding, that sort of thing. Cycling isn't too bad, at least I can make progress at a reasonable speed. Running has got a few things going for it - it's easy to just go and do, it burns a lot of calories, plus now I'm back in a job where there's a decent chance I might have to run, not that I'll catch anyone but I don't want to make a complete and utter tit out of myself...

Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 21:40

Rasp it sounds like Nookie has some good advice? Kick som ass. I know that takes energy though, so do it once you have summoned your strength. They completely fucked everything up. I am obviously sorry for anyone who goes off ill, but they should have provision in place to deal with stuff like that.

Running scares me.

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evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 21:30

I did couch to 5k at the end of 2011/beginning of 2012. I was quite surprised I was able to run 5k at all, but HOTB and I were going out and running that distance every weeknight for several months.

I got scared of running after coming home last Easter and going into anaphylactic shock for no apparent reason, though, and have not really dared to run since. Still, the allergy people said they could find no cause, and it was over a year ago, so perhaps I should try again Mind you, I always hated it, except the smug feeling when I stopped. Running is like punishment, where cycling is fun even when it hurts.

evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 21:25

Good advice from Nookie, put the frighteners on them!

Twinks, I have a gorgeous road bike - I love it to bits. It goes astonishingly fast given enough input, fastest speed recorded so far (downhill with a strong tail wind) is 35.3mph, which was great fun last week Grin

I lost the first stone ages ago, mostly by being less of a greedy pig, I think. The second stone has gone since Christmas through the dubious method of eating little/nothing for breakfast and lunch, and small portions for dinner. I'm not cutting anything out because it would make me sad, but I try not to eat too much cake too often! The cycling is helping a lot, too, though over the winter I didn't get much done as it was so icy. I don't think I ever drank in any great excess, but I am consciously limiting myself to one (double) G&T every Friday, which is good for the IVF forms as well as my weight. Mind you, since resigning last August, the stress-induced desire to drink has really dropped off.

FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn · 29/04/2013 21:22

Couch 2 5K. It's a 9 week programme to get you from the couch (doing bugger all) to running 5k. You run 3 times a week listening to the podcasts. I've just finished Week 1 which is basically walk 5 minutes, run 60s, walk 90s (repeat 8 times). As you move on through the weeks you start running for slightly longer periods of time until you reach the last run of weekb9 which is a full 30min run.

'Tis quite good acksherly. I always said I hated running, but this is keeping me interested at the moment Grin

TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 21:21

frank has linked to it for you. It's the NHS couch to 5k programme, a running plan for absolute beginners. It is kind of cult-ish!

rasp don't worry about getting judged. I've jacked in a development programme at work and gone back to the least prestigious of all roles, and I know that everyone who sees me is whispering and trying to work out if I've been kicked off the programme, if I've done something terrible - but I haven't, I've just taken steps to preserve my own mental health because I know how awful hating your job is. Fuck 'em all.