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Conception

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Original poster

The Genuine BESH Palais. To misquote Carlsberg, we're probably the barrenest TTC-ers in the world...

984 replies

HesterShaw · 19/04/2013 22:18

We are Barren. We are Evil, on account of having left procreating until our 30s. We are Selfish, thinking only of careers and money and cars and holidays. And lastly, we are Hags. Welcome to the BESH gin palace. Babydusters and instadiffers need not apply.

OP posts:
CaptainMoll · 30/04/2013 13:35

That actually made me want to cry a bit, but I'm at work so I can't do that.

Nokkie73 · 30/04/2013 13:11

bugs. That's quite perceptive for a man. Up to a point. Will God help me put a baby in my tumtum, do you think ? [hmmm]

hest can you add a 3 for 2 voucher for Relate and the book 'No-one gives an arse when you put Freddie on solids'. I speak from bitter experience. An entire hen weekend was nearly ruined by one very lovely new mother boring the cunt off me trying to decide when to put her son onto solids.

franks Cumberbatch ? Really ? I can't fancy him, ever since I saw him play Stephen Hawking. Is that wrong ? Probably.

twinks you mixed the booze, hence you feel like shittypoop. School girl error.

JustplainoldBuggerlugs · 30/04/2013 12:56

This reply has been withdrawn

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JustplainoldBuggerlugs · 30/04/2013 12:54

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FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn · 30/04/2013 12:31

I won't join the queue for Huge Ackman, it's all about the Cumberbatch over here Grin. I have booked my tickets to see Star Trek on my birthday .

Can't believe I'll be 32 in less than 2 weeks. I always thought I'd be sprogged up by now Sad

TWinklyLittleStar · 30/04/2013 10:45

Just noticed the nc faif, like it. But you'll have to join the fight queue for Hugh.

Anyway I'm buying my cousin fuck all. I have PMT, my boobs hurt, and I had a magners and a beer last night after months.of sobriety and I feel sick as a dog. After two drinks, ffs. Won't be doing that again.

HadALittleFaithBaby · 30/04/2013 10:38

August!

HadALittleFaithBaby · 30/04/2013 10:38

Oi, I thought me and hesty had agreed dibs on Huge?!

That list sounds excellent hest!

Lots of baybees borned in the last few weeks - Olympic/Augur conceptions! (guilty Blush)

EuroShaggleton · 30/04/2013 10:38

Maybe we should make up a BESH preggo and birth pack?

Original poster
HesterShaw · 30/04/2013 10:33

Ah yes, we'll talk about it here.
So....

lavender oil for shredded fanjo
Pro plus
Red Bull
Kalms
Rescue Remedy
earplugs
pile cream

OP posts:
TWinklyLittleStar · 30/04/2013 10:30

One born every minute and all that.

So, passive aggressive gifts. Maternity pads, nipple cream, a jar of coffee for those sleepless nights?

Original poster
HesterShaw · 30/04/2013 10:28

OK, we don't know each other. More than one baby born on the same day? Remarkable.

OP posts:
Original poster
HesterShaw · 30/04/2013 10:06

Um right. TWinks do we actually know each other. Because my SIL had her baby this morning also

OP posts:
TWinklyLittleStar · 30/04/2013 09:50

Don't tire him out too much eh?

Well done frank. Don't forget to stretch.

My cousin had her baybee this morning. I'm at home this weekend, I'll be expected to visit. I don't want to.

Original poster
HesterShaw · 30/04/2013 09:46

I was thinking more of just shagging him. We could all have a go. Me first though.

OP posts:
FrankellyMyDearIDontGiveADamn · 30/04/2013 08:15

I did my first run of week 2 today. Ouch!

evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 23:47

Who was it who suggested a Hugh Jackman fred? I'm well up for that. We can stab instadiffers through the throat with our adamantium blade-claws. Not that I like ultra-violence or anything...

CaptainMoll · 29/04/2013 23:27

I'd like a Huge Ackman plz.

I have nothing more useful to contribute this evening.

evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 22:31

Hurrah, not that callous! Grin It makes me laugh so much.

EuroShaggleton · 29/04/2013 22:31

Old skool, draf.

Twink the worst is when the flight is delayed so they use the extra time to piss people off by doing things like weighing and measuring hand luggage.

Thanks hest. I feel better for that. :)

evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 22:30
Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 22:29

As soon as I clicked on that and saw the title "Hancock's Half Hour" I knew what you mean. That's very nearly an armful!

OP posts:
evilgiraffe · 29/04/2013 22:28

Empty arm just makes me - 14:00 to 14:25 ish Grin

Original poster
HesterShaw · 29/04/2013 22:24

Sorry Euro. Here, have this fishslap instead.

Didn't think it was callous so much as true, Winks. Dunno how on earth these women do it, especially seeing as most of them claim to be wall to wall breastfeeding until their offspring starts school

OP posts:
TWinklyLittleStar · 29/04/2013 22:19

Gosh. My reply there was callous. Sorry hest :(