The Elderberry Pavlovas who occasionally sausage wang – a fabulous thread for 30+ ladies TTC #1 (Thread 8)

Sid, sorry your weekend wasn't what you hoped for. Perhaps when you're feeling less emotional, you and your DH need to sit down and talk about what needs to happen and when. I know that's desperately unromantic, but I remember when we were trying to adapt to the TTC routine, my DH felt a bit under pressure and we fell into the trap of arguing about it in the heat of the moment a couple of times. In the end I used my cunning teacher ways to get him to do some research on when was best to 'step up' the efforts and make him think it was his idea...not sure if you could manage to do that or ifi it's already too far down the line for you. It helped though as I think it gave him a feeling of control. We get it through opks, temping, cm monitoring, etc. guess the menfolk may feel quite helpless and at the mercy of our shag demands!

frog I did that too the other night and woke up with pins and needles!

thunder I have literally eaten my weight in ferrero roches today (not conducive to imminently needed bikini bod!)

Hi berries.

Glad to hear your father is doing better bajas. Echo the sentiments about wanting a baby in part for the wider family. I'm the only chance at grandkids for my parents, and believe me my mother never goes long letting me forget it. She doesn't realize just how painful the little comments can be.

We are back from our bonk weekend. What a bust. Got a peak reading on Fri morning before heading out, and DH was cuffed as we'd DTD the night before. DTD again Fri pm, used 3G of Preseed; took Jim forever to finish as he'd drunk too much and neither of us could really feel what was going on. I had to admit that the problem wasn't all on his end, and was completely mortified. Sat went on a huge hike, didn't DTD as DH felt ill at bedtime and spent hours in the bathroom during the night. Woke up this morning & peak reading had changed to high. Promptly went on crying jag that still isn't fully spent.

I am just so over feeling like this is my project that I need DH's help with, instead of a truly joint effort. He was ill last night, but felt fine before that, but DTD just wasn't a priority I guess. IC OPKs still showing faint line, so God only knows if the CBFM is right, or the OpKs are, or if my app is, which doesn't show of til tomorrow. I don't know if we're out of time or if the right time hasn't really gotten in full swing yet.

I effing hate this. I hate how obsessive it's making me but my DH is so laid back that putting him in charge of this to give me a break seems like a pipe dream. really disappointed in him. We could've DtD this morning but it didn't even occur to him and I was feeling too teary to ask, even though that would've been the thing to salvage the day.

boodle v jealous of Sunday afternoon DTD. I went to the funfair at the chav seaside near us & was jealous of teenage tattooed instadiffers. I did fall asleep last night with my folded pillow under my arse though . I thought about getting up & putting the mooncup in but thought the gravity en route would be bad. Got a line on my OPK today so have started stapling them in an exercise book to see which day is darkest as I never got one as dark as the control line last cycle. If you don't O at all would you still get surges but never the dark line or would you just get nothing all the way through?

thunder chuck us some chocolate - I'm just about to go to the gym so will work it off promise!

frog lol at spawn of satan haha

boodle brilliant idea! Goodbye baby bumps and ultrasound scans!!!! Just shared the idea with my friend who has just stopped going on fb altogether as its so upsetting!

Oh even thinking about pimping can't put me off the choc pots!

Well done boo!

Mmm...chocolate! I'm currently in bed doing the 'wave your legs in the air' TTC dance and a bit of choccy would be lovely! (Thought you all might like to know that... !

Just realised I got shafted by autocorrect earlier. Of course I fell in love with a partially sighted cat, not a cat located partly at the rescue centre and partly elsewhere... Silly me for not proof reading!

Well that's not fair is it bunny.. What's your headache all about?!

Yep sure thing- have a big piece of this. Got some gu chocolate pots too if you fancy one..

Hi everyone. CD 1 here accompanied with a hangover. Yuk.

I'm feeling philosophical too though today, I have so much in my life to be thankful for and this is a whole new cycle.

Blind, I think I would be overprotective of a blind puss cat too! When we got our two fur monsters, there was a lovely partially sited cat at the rescue centre. I wanted him desperately but they didn't think he would cope with babies. Naive ttc optimism there as that was well over 28 months ago.

Frog I spent a lot of the time on the beach today looking enviously at the couples with two dogs and looking forward to getting home to my dog and not having two small squabbling and whinging children around all the time! I love my mate's kids, they are brilliant and I spent quite a lot of time with them, including having them for the wkd while my mate and her husband get away etc, but they're not my kids, and as the 3 year old weed in his trousers for the second time that day I did find myself thinking well if nothing works and we end up adopting at least we could get a 5 year old and skip the potty training !!

Anyway, I'm on the laptop to plan, I only came back to the web to download resources and got distracted as this tab was still open and I've got an hour left before my mate will be here to pick me up for a run so I'm off to try and work harder...

Actually feeling quite relaxed here today about the whole TTC thing. Probably because I spent the whole afternoon with SS acting like the spawn of satan which I think would challenge anyone and even a berry to think twice about potentially rearing another one of those. Obviously I tell myself that mine & DP's child would be totally different but there is still one parent in common . Also it's shag fortnight so the disappointment of the 2WW has faded & I can be optimistic about this month. DP only bought 2 bottles of wine in tesco this week so maybe I'm slowly getting thru about the booze.
I'm lucky that most of close friends with babies don't really do FB. My best friend is due end of this month tho so first trip to see her is going to be a challenge.

barking One of my friends (the bump one) is also very kindly looking after our cat when we go away so as well as really not wanting to lose her friendship, I actually need to stay friends with her. God, that makes me sound so selfish doesn't it? I just find it really hard to find reliable people to leave my cat with (I'm massively over-protected of her, in case you hadn't realised!)

Anyway, how are you today? x

Hi boodle and bunny

I've returned from my campervan seaside trip with my mate and her 3 and 5 year old kids. Knackered as been awake since 5am and spent two days walking sllloooooowwwwllly along the beach and feigning enthusiasm over shells and pebbles whilst trying not to cry over the ridiculous number of babies with doting parents and cooing grandparents at the beach. They were everywhere !!!!! The grandparents with babies always get me even more than the mothers as I know it's too late for me to ever see my parents both push a baby of mine through a park. Not fair .

Sooo, I'm now on the laptop to start planning, and I can't find my memory stick, although I seem to remember there was very little on there anyway so I might as well start again. If I can stay awake....
Next week I will get my planning done before Sunday.....

Kitty I do the same - just hide their updates so that their child rants and baby photos don't appear on your newsfeed. They can still see what you're doing and if you choose to contact them or visa versa you still can. If you block them they will probably realise as they won't be able to contact you or see anything you post anywhere. If you've got mutual friends you'll get to the situation where if you comment on something and your mutual friend replies, the blocked friend won't see your comment but she'll know something's missing as she'll see the reply. I'd avoid that if possible.

Totally understand the meltdown over getting bumps sprung on you, Although I'd heard rumours, I hadn't heard about the friend pg with twins until I saw her bump at the wedding, and I worked out later that she would have been pregnant when I'd had a long conversation with her about ttc and she didn't mention anything other than they were trying as well, but didn't seem to want to talk about it. She would have known at the time but only been about 8 weeks along. I appreciate that's probably too early anyway to be wanting to tell anyone, but as she knew we were trying it might have been nice for her to tell us before the obvious bump gave us the news .

I can also sympathise with DP/DH not getting it. I started crying when DP gave me an update on his B & SiL's bump and he just looked confused and then annoyed. .

oi I'm here too! Feeling a bit better now so promise not to make you all miserable haha xx

Tut. Trust Bunny to turn up just as I get comfortable!

Cor! It's dead quiet in here! Obviously people are doing something productive and useful whilst I sit here wasting time and putting off planning.

< Saunters across the Berry lounge wearing nothing but a cheeky smile and novelty sausage slippers because the floor is cold. Whose idea was hardwood floors? >

(It's still Bood|e by the way! Just having one of my regular name tweaks!)