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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

a safe sanctuary for larger ladies who are ttc!

88 replies

acsr1987 · 03/02/2013 21:03

im starting a new thread for ladies who dont want to be judged about being a chubster, and to know the hurt it feels to be told your too fat to get pregnant, yet see heffers bigger than u with their babies. to be comfort eating because yet again your af has come. to try really hard to shift the buldge but only get a few pounds off.
im here for you ladies....
no skinny minnies or put downs please or we will squash u with our big fat arses!!!!

OP posts:
DoctorWhoFan · 04/02/2013 07:49

Hello isabeller! How are things?

Jacqueline, I'm certain that acsr didn't mean it that way. And mucho congratulations on the baby on board! I'm over 16 stones. I'd love to lose weight, but I struggle with mobility. I used to be a runner, ended up with double knee surgery 6 years ago and the weight has piled on. I can't walk far due to the knees (and the fibromyalgia) and neither can I swim or cycle because of the knees. I sometimes think the surgery was a waste of time because they're no less painful or restricting since it happened.

Despite all this, AND the bipolar disorder and anxiety, I still have no doubt I could be a good mother, and neither does my psych, which is encouraging.

Unfortunately, I'm 45 and ttc my first cos it took so bloody long to meet my DP. Mind you, at 14 years younger than me...if I'd met him 10 years ago, that would have felt a bit weird.

So being fat is probably the least of my worries personally, but almost certainly the one I'll get most grief from the medical profession for. Apart from the GP I saw last year about fertility issues who made it quite plain that she wouldn't help me even get blood tests because she clearly felt that my mental health issues should preclude me from becoming a parent. If I hadn't been so upset, I'd have complained about her.

Sorry about the essay...hi ladies!

Isabeller · 04/02/2013 07:15

We're all surrounded by pretty derogatory language about weight, it's difficult not to get caught up but really worth trying to support each other. Lots of vilified groups have 'reclaimed' the language of oppression too...

I am hoping that if I do manage to achieve a pregnancy though fertility treatment my size will help me hide the fact for as long as possible and I'm also hoping I will be able to lose weight (even though I find it very difficult) as apparently it's not unsafe to lose weight in pregnancy as was once thought.

I'm really encouraged by this too.

Good luck to all ttc

Original poster
acsr1987 · 04/02/2013 06:05

jaqueline its sanctuary for fat girls ttc, i was told before i had my ds at 17 stone that i was too fat to ever possibly get pregnant... but obviously its not impossible because u got pregnant at 22 stone... do u realise how frustrating that can be to someone who is ttc for a long time? its like a massive slap in the face and im sure im not the only one who feels like that! it its abit of joke and banter... just like it is when we are pissed off that everyone around us is pregnant... at the end of the day we fat lasses are still struggeling on! thats all i ment if i caused offence im sorry

OP posts:
JaquelineHyde · 03/02/2013 23:01

Yes now I am 29 weeks pg there is no doubt I look pregnant. I suddenly just popped out at about 20 weeks and haven't stopped growing since Grin

I am amazed that I look so pg as I was worried I would just look like I had put all the weight back on that I have managed to lose over the last year. Definitely a nice big baby bump though Smile

Natalieand · 03/02/2013 22:48

As you are a similar weight to me do u mind me asking how you look pregnant? Can ppl tell u r pregnant? If that makes sense

JaquelineHyde · 03/02/2013 22:45

But acsr you are looking for a safe place away from the judgement of others and then you throw insults at women who are bigger than you.

So really you are just as bad as the slimmer people you are looking for a sanctuary away from.

I appreciate that may not have been your attention in your op but that is how it felt when reading it.

Natalie I was 22stone 8lb when I got my bfp and I have lost a stone since being pg. I'm looking forward to what the scales will say a few weeks after the birth.

Original poster
acsr1987 · 03/02/2013 22:25

jaqueline, its just one of those things that feels like a slap in the face to ladies who hav already been told they are to fat to get pregnant, then u see someone who is fatter than you pregnant it can sometimes be disheartening.
no offence or anything babe but we are all heffers in here! and theres nothin the matter with that!

OP posts:
Natalieand · 03/02/2013 22:13

Now big r u jacquline?

JaquelineHyde · 03/02/2013 22:04

'see heffers bigger than you with their babies' Yeah really nice OP!

I was coming on here to offer support and encouragement but as a heffer considerably bigger than you and currently 29 weeks pg I suspect my advice won't be welcomed!

So much for not wanting to be judged hey Hmm

GoSuckEggs · 03/02/2013 21:59

I am hoping for my bfp on the 22nd of feb! i am 16.3, i have lost a stone since new years, and hoping to keep loosing!

Natalieand · 03/02/2013 21:53

I'm not due till the 6th but got a faint line on first response test yesterday, I had my implant out at end if sept last year so its only my 4th cycle since then first time round it took a year to conceive and that's with sperm issues for my husband. I have been using conceive plus lube instead of normal has normal I've is harmful too sperm. Also this month I don't slim fast diet for about two weeks so maybe that helped? Lol I don't no but I will have too retest in a few days to confirm :-)

Original poster
acsr1987 · 03/02/2013 21:48

OMG that is amazing! ooooo i have my fingers crossed for you! do u have any tips? im hoping that 14 and a half stone is going to be my bfp weight as it was with my ds so fingers crossed for me, im due af on the 15th so in the tww now aaaaaaaaah i feel sick with nerves lol

OP posts:
Natalieand · 03/02/2013 21:46

Hello all I was 17 stone when I first conceived my 2.4 year old daughter and I'm pretty sure I've just had a faint BFP at 20 stone... No not ideal but that won't stop me being excited :-)