Five and the Mystery of the Declining Fertility - the BESH engage the services of the Famous Five to track down their baybees and finish with lashings of ginger beer. Topping!

Hullo BESH's! Sorry to barge in uninvited, but I simply couldn't resist. This an absolutely wizard thread and I've been carrying lashings of ginger beer around all day, so I thought maybe you'd like to help me swig some of it. It's simply super if you add a great big dollop of this scrummy vodka!

Anyway, hello. I'm 32, TTC number 1 for about 17 cycles. Been through a bunch of blood tests, had several things shoved up my foof in the last few weeks and discovered a "mysterious lump" that may be a cyst or a fibroid, and may need surgery or not. The Uterine Mass of Adventure, anyone?

DH is edging perilously close to 40, and has so far been too fecking busy with work to go for any tests at all.

So that's me.

*pats Timmy, devours all the chocolate, discovers hidden entrance to goldmine

In my life? Probably 21 days. But I don't think I've been that short for some years. This is the problem with unpredictable cycles. What if this month the unpredictable thing is that it's going to be super short? Argh!

Ooh, it's you, jeffers! How are you feeling today?

It will be ok North. You are probably much more aware of everything that is going on with your body at the moment. What's your shortest cycle been?

Calm me down, BESH, pleeeeease. Drug company are delivering drugs next Thursday. I have to start injecting on CD2. I am currently on CD20. Last cycle was 36 days. This should all work out ok. BUT, I feel absurdly pre-menstrual - crampy/bloated and a vaguely full and wet, you know, there. Oh please don't let me have a freakish 21 day cycle or something. Not now I have go this far. Could this be ovulation? I've never had these as symptoms of egg-laying before, but do they seem recognisable as that to you?

Aren't they Rie? Despite having a garden full of squirrels, ours never figured out that they disappeared up trees when she chased them.

JethroDog is a boxer puppy. It took us a while but now we have bonded and I love him. He's snoring with his head on my knee right now.

We used to have a dopey retriever. The disappearing balls were always a mystery to her. Another good one was throwing snowballs for her to catch. She always looked so confuzzled when there was nothing left.

Jeff am properly that you have a dog to throw amazing white vanishing balls for. When it snows I miss my lovely old girl, we had such fun. The expression on her lovely doggy face when she caught one and it exploded into a shower of powder in her mouth...

East Angular snow update - a mere sprinkling for us so far today (looks like cook spilt the icing sugar!). I'm about to head off to catch my train that that there London so probably won't check in again till Sunday. Don't go having loads of adventures without me!

Snow watch update from Derby: LOADS!! It's been snowing all day.

Euro were you watching when I took JethroDog out this morning?

There is a fair amount of snow here. I think I might dig out my boots and go for a walk.

I want to take Timmy for a walk in the snow. And make him chase balls that disappear into the snow leaving him all confused.

BESH snow watch report: I'm in Central London, it's been snowing moderately since about 9am. It's settling on the ungritted areas, but is not at all deep yet.

Me, ariel? I am in London, sadly, or I would have been right there for a jolly snowy frolic.

The famous five go cross country skiing to Oxford to bring twinkly to her meeting. I LOVE snow, waves at ariel.

Jolly bad news frank old chap. And terribly sorry about your, ahem, women's problems, AnnEuro

Snow here too - day trip to oxford cancelled, so I went panic shopping to tesco and bought Mario Kart.

Snow here too, but it's very very fine, so not at all deep yet. It is -1 degrees though so it is settling - at the minute it looks like everything is covered in icing sugar :)

Hurrrah for tobogganing!

Sorry for the BFN frankel. From your chart, you really should be up the pole. Hmmm.

If I'm weedy Ann on the basis of my pathetic ability to withstand the cold, I have to tell you Norfy Droid is very much with Ann. Oh yes.

bog smoke=big smoke
I cannot type today!

Morning hags!

Bad luck, old chap frankelly. I would ask nurse at the clinic, rather than faif in this case what is going on, and trek into the snow now! I say AYE to toboganning (sp, that is a word I rarely use!) all the way to the bog smoke for a lovely weekend of camping out there and gazing at pretty clothes.

And norf do rearrange! I am working from home on Monday too, so we can even distract eachother (unless my secretary of all people convinces me I should be in, I think I shall not return her call ).

Hurrah for a lovely turning of birfdays Anneuro. Wine and steak sound fabulous.

We went to an info evening on ivf at our clinic. It was BORING and we ran off in the break rather than socialise with other barren couples, we did get stuck trying to get out with a bunch of other, normal looking, barren couples who wanted to escape as well. We just heard the benefits of a healthy life style (the only thing that makes a BIG difference is smoke and a lot of alcohol) so we went to the pub :)

Thanks chaps . I'm not disappointed because I didn't expect it to say otherwise. I'll see what the clinic say next week, they'll probably send me tablets to bring on the droid, then it's drucks round 2.

Anyone fancy a spot of tobogganing on cook's tin trays?

Aww, sorry Frank :(