Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

Hi Stephanie.... You have joined us!!!! Welcome to out thread...
As my brain never works anyway, I can't remember the order of things if you want to add your details to the list and I know someone else will jump in and tell you, but make youself comfortable, have a cuppa and again welcome! :)

Hi, want to join in but not sure how this works. Will check back in when I finish work and see if anybody has explained how to join in!!!!!! Bit of a technophobe!!!!!

Gum, that's excellent news about your pay rises, but you should have had them at the correct time. Thank goodness your service was checked out, otherwise they'd have continued to get away with paying less than you deserve. I'm sorry about your suspected BFN.

Isabeller, is your MIL is ok after her fall? I hope you're feeling positive about your chances with a frozen cycle. Awaiting news of your lump and very much hoping it's nothing serious.

Calibee, I hope you're DP can make it home this weekend. Your London trip sounds great. The Aquarium is really great, DD loves it as she's into all things fishy.

Diege, how are you feeling?

Remnant, I hope you've managed to find somewhere to do your ERPC, at least it eliminates the waiting for the m/c to start naturally, which must be horrible.

Notsoold, it must seem like a long time til your next scan and not knowing what's happening. Fx that it'll be ok.

DH just texted me to say how miserable he is - we both are, I wish I knew how to help him, because I feel responsible for him being so unhappy and want to make it better, and because it's making me miserable too.

Hi to everyone I haven't name checked, have a lovely weekend. xx

Good morning...where did the week go its Friday, yay.

hopefulgum thats excellent news re your payrise. Good for you.

Isabeller...sorry to hear about mil's fall. Is she ok?? It sounds very encouraging about your frozen cycle. Is there a reason for the delayed start?

I am going to be waiting with baited breath all day for a text from DP to say weather or not he will get home tonight. I've not had any contact with him since Sunday night, which is the longest time we have ever been out of touch since meeting each other. I have soppily sent him a "good night...I love you text" with a little bit of news on each day. Lord only knows what I would be like if he goes to Afghan?

So far on the itinery for London Sea Life centre (tickets got using my Tesco clubcard vouchers) London Zoo, Dungeon, Imperial War Museum (thats me..I'm a closet geek) a trip up the Shard...lots of walking, lots of food and lots of sex ...hopefully the best babymaking kind.

Galway...i dont mind at all...thank you!!!!....

Lurking checking how Diege is doing,

Notsold - just wanted to give a slight bit of hope. I went for a scan at 7+3 when certain of dates and having had positive test more than two weeks previous to be told that sac measure 5 weeks only and no foetal pole. Went back 10 days later to perfect pregnancy correct for dates. Spotting and cramping turned out to be nothing and that pregnancy led to my now 8 year old dd. I have had many many miscarriages and can only advise that you take one day at a time and keep telling yourself that "today I am pregnant" and don't thing beyond that for now. Whatever happens you cannot alter, but try not to dwell on all the possibilities, try to keep focused on just where you are now. Hope you don't mind me saying all this , I have just been where you are now, and it is hard to get through the time of not knowing.

OMG what a mad week. DPs mum had a fall at her day centre and we spent 5 hours in A&E with her on Monday and the pace has hardly slowed since, I will be so relieved to get back to the building site I call home .

It's very encouraging to read everyone's pregnancy news and fun and happy stuff like your trip Calibee. I haven't totally caught up with thread but I'm so touched by everyone good wishes. Yesterday the clinic were very positive about the chance of success with a frozen cycle but there will be a bit of a wait before we can start. I'm seeing my GP about the lump as soon as I get home tomorrow afternoon, I've hardly had time to worry about it this week which is a sort of blessing.

Time for a and relax before packing x Is

Googling in my lunch-break I stumbled upon an excellent website which will allow me to remain in my comfortable denial just for a few more days....apparently there is a 30% chance that my bfn is a false negative (that goes for you too hopeful!)

www.countdowntopregnancy.com/pregnancy-test/dpo-chart.php?dpo=10

lizard early days...but there is still time x

Thanks to all who have made suggestions for the London trip...I have bought a book called "50 walks in London" which I think will come into use a fair bit with the odd stop off for light refreshments . Somebody mentioned the 2 for 1's through National Rail...I have saved a load of vouchers on there but my printer has broke so will sneekily print those out at work today...thankyou. I have been on the London eye before and yes it was a bit crammed so that cable car sounds fab....also thinking maybe the view from The Shard may be worth taking in......oooo so exciting. I've been and done all these things before but going with DP maks it all feel new again.

Remnant so sorry you're still in limbo land. Its pure torture ...I know exactly how you are feeling. If nearer the time you feel up for a coffee....

notsoold I dont really know what to say as nothing will take you away from how you are feeling. I was similar in your position though...think the worst and anything else is a bonus....if the worst happens then you are already in the right mindset. However, I still really hope to be reading that you have had good news next week. x Had to giggle at your ds though. Mine is 15... and blocked and defriended me a couple of years ago on facebook ...however dd2 showed me some pics of him from last weekend with a very pretty girl draped around his shoulders. He is constantly at the gym just lately and has muscled and toned up...at 6ft1 he actually looks like a man, oh my...what happened to my baby

sparkly raaa to your DH, he needs a bit of a "man up" shake I think. I understand he must be feeling awful but sulking isnt going to help, its just going to lose him his family. Be strong girl...whatever happens you will get through.

diege so sorry to hear the sickness isnt responding as well to the cyclizine. Has your Dr mentioned any other medication you might try??

jbrd I hope you're having a marvellous time in centre parks.

hopefulgum ...is the faint line still showing. Thats how my bfp was last time. so feint at 10dpo that I wrote it off...2days later, still feint but no mistaking it. I hope its good news for you. I found a site (sad I know) where women were posting pics of their hpt's and people voted whether they thought it was bfp or bfn...I confess to posting mine .My ds is a Charlie too...

3rd day of clomid today...headache from hell and nasty dry mouth but I think I'm lucky to just get away with those side effects.

I'm sorry if I have missed anybody...big wave to all.

hopeful - I am right behind you on the testing front despite my attempts to pretend I was not going to today (but hey with a big bag of internet tests sitting in my drawer were calling to me).....so I did test this morning at 10DPO and it was a BFN (sigh). I seem to be perpetually freezing, still have a runny nose and my temps are higher than they usually are. Regrettably these are only symptoms of having a cold not being pregnant

But if you are getting symptoms at 10DPO that is much more interesting! I think you said that your symptoms seem much stronger in week one and here you are in week two with tender bits....mmmm.

notsoold the waiting is just agony isn't it, I'm sure you wish you could fast forward time to your scan next week. x
I think your DS would get on well with my DD1. She was a real little tomboy when she was younger and a keen footballer and even though she's now 13 and a bit more girly she would probably still be happier playing on the PS3 than going out on a date with a member of the opposite sex. Wasn't that girl brave coming round to ask your DS out though!
gum you know there's no need to apologise for having a rant, I for one certainly know how you feel, I find myself noticing all sorts of symptoms that raise my hopes in the 2ww and find the disappointment each time increasingly hard. I'm trying not to test each month unless my temps remain high,I keep comparing temps each cycle to my pregnancy ones. I suppose premenstrual symptoms can be quite similar to early pregnancy ones but until this last year I never paid so much attention to my body! However, 10dpo is still early to test,it's not over yet.
Diege sorry you're feeling so ill,hang in there.
Sparkly sorry things still are difficult with your DH but good that you have rl support.
remnant it's like being in limbo ,I found the two weeks waiting for my last miscarriage to start such a hard time. Booking an erpc will hopefully give you some resolution.Glad you've got a holiday to look forward to at Easter.
look after yourself x
Morien your doctor sounds great,you must be happy to be getting some tests done. He's right,40 isn't old at all(says the now ancient 45 year old!!)
Hi to everyone else

Morien....planning a wedding!!! As a ( normally and without caffeine) excitable pro wedding person I am excited on my sofa and I haven't met you personally.... Planning a wedding!!!!!

Irish....belgium chocolate.... Oh heaven!!!hope you are well!!!

Isabeller....hope you have the situation sorted soon..xxx

Remnant...hi honey..xxx

Diege...rest and take easy, ok???

Gum...testing again??? Darker line I hope

Sparkly...it is very hard to read your posts without getting cross with your other half. So good tou have a RL to support you xxx

Calibee...if you go during weekend what about Camden Town???

Jbrd hi there...thinking of you

Thanks for your kind posts yesterday, after Irish kind words I just broke down and took a long while to be able to come downstairs and spend time with ds (unaware of anything having a friend over). Because the gestacional sac measured around 12mm placing it around 42 daysish ( therefore a fetal pole pretty much should have to be present). I really want to believe that on the 7th there will be a progress but ( and a big but)with the information and the talk by the MW i dont hold almpst any hope...Maybe because of the upset but even my sore boobs are not as sore... I need to prepare myself for the worse because it can only get better... And true to my worries , when comforting me dh express concerns about being almost 54....
Is he the oldest here???
He also reminded me ( as if I needed) that I had a mmc in june and a cp in december and maybe my body is npt coping or ( wait for it) my body is taking slowly and remembering on stages how to hold on to a pg :(
On a lighter note , a girl came to the door asking ds out...( I am so decrepit). Girls at 13 look so much more mature than boys don't they???
He ( bless his heart) said to her no in a very gentle way but damage the effect by adding that PS3 games are his thing on a Saturday night. She wasn't happy....and I kept out of it.

Hi all,

Thanks for thinking about me calibee, diege and anyone else.
i've been busily distracting myself (booking a holiday - our first to the med - before easter, when hopefully(!) all this will be behind me). Went to work last week but this week I'm finding I get really tearful whenever out of the house. Still no bleeding or any sign of a natural resolution . Local hospital even called me to see what was happening. I decided to book in for an eprc on monday, but discovered that it would mean waiting around all day on ward and no guarantees to get seen early enough to get home that night, so now I'm trying to find somewhere that will do it privately, since insurance policy, it turns out, covers it at some hospitals. It's turning out to be quite complicated but at hoping it will mean less waiting eventually. I'm generally feeling quite gutted and trying to accept that this is it.

I do want to say congrats to diege and calendergal
Fingers crossed for you notsoold x

Calibee, glad you've got your holiday booked. Premier in is our favourite uk hotel these days. London Bridge is a great location too. Can I recommend the river boat run by TFL - good value (not much more than a tube journey) and very lovely way to move about London, with great views. You can do a round trip (interesting to go out east to see end of london if you're into that sort of thing) you can also get off at London eye and get the cable car over the river for a bit of novelty (not that there's much on the north side to see, but you can go straight back over again and get the boat back west). Cable car is about a third of the price of london eye and we've never had to share a cabin (unlike crowded eye). Also Borough Market, on your doorstep, is worth seeing, but so expensive (think harrods). I'd say let's meet up if your dp is off meeting family but i don't think I'd make very good company under the circumstances x

My goodness, this thread is filling up!

Isabeller, I'm really sorry to hear about your lump. I would imagine that anything serious would have been picked up by the IVF-related scans, examinations etc that you've had but it must be an awful worry. Have you been for a test?

notsoold, I don't really understand all the ins and outs of fetal poles etc - never had an early scan - but I do know that a few days make all the difference at this stage (and also that even dating scans don't date precisely). Is it possible that your calculations are a couple of days out? Keeping all crossed for you.

Congratulations Morien - I planned my wedding with a similar timescale. Your plans sound lovely. I have a very romantic idea of Belgium (probably nothing like it in the flesh!)

sparkly, sorry your DH has still not stepped up to the plate. I'm glad you have a friend who can support you though.

gum, a shadow of a line sounds promising. Will you test again tomorrow?

Welcome back Irish

CaliBee, what do you and DP like to do? Let us give you some ideas for your trip.

Hi to remnant if you're out there, and anyone else I've missed.

I'm OK - I've swelled up and actually look pregnant (by about four months!), although that ought to be impossible. It must be gas. I'm both getting a "this is really real" feeling, and getting a little bit excited, and trying not to get too excited as I have had two losses pre-DD, including one at 6wks (I will be 6 wks on Saturday). I have been very tired too.

sparkly every time I see a post from you I hope you'll say that your DH has had a blow to the head that has restored his sanity and that it's all ok. I'm sorry it's not.

irish glad you liked Belgium!

How are you notsoold? Sorry it wasn't better news - hoping the next scan will put your mind at rest.

Went to the gynae's - very nice man. He prescribed some blood tests, so I'll go and get that done in the morning and should have the results next week. The tests are: HCG, LH, FSH, prolactin, oestradiol, progesterone, testosterone, DHEA sulphate, thyroid. I'm to call next week for the results, and regardless of that to go back if I haven't had my period by the end of next week. He laughed (in the nicest possible way) at my frustation at no BFP since my MC - he said that whilst there are women who are lucky and bounce back, in most cases the body takes time to recover and that actually it's not that long since August. I said, 'but time's running out, I'm 40 already!', and he said, 'so you're 40 - what's the problem with that?'

WRT planning our wedding, I don't think there'll be a problem. The ceremony will be at our 'maison communale' (town hall), there's no choice for a civil ceremony here (but at least ours is a very pretty one!) And we won't be needing a booking for the big family meal in our lovely garden, with maybe a few friends round in the evening for a BBQ too. We haven't contacted the maison communale yet but we'll just go by when they have a slot and when my mum & stepdad and my sister and her DH and DD can get over here. (It's my second time around and until now I was never sure I'd do it again. DP until now has never wanted to get married to anyone - he didn't marry his DCs' mum, although she wanted to. We want to mark it, but in a low-key, relaxed way.

Off for a nice relaxing bath...

sparkly,meant to say how awful it must me for you with dh being so utterly hurtful and selfish. At least you have some supportive rl friends - and us of course!!!
remnant are you ok> Have been thinking about you and how things might be going x
isabeller how are they handling the abdominal lump situation? My mum had what that described as a fatty 'mass' in her stomach when she was younger and it turned out to be a very harmless cyst - had a special name too but totally fine.

notsoold you must be very anxious. Hoping you can try and distract yourself until the next scan but I know how difficult that can be. How are you feeling today?
morien many congrats on the wedding - I like the understated way you told us
Gum ooh you are very naughty. fwiw, all my faintest of lines seen only when tipped towards the light (but not too bright) have turned into darker ones a few days later. I know you will have tested again so let us know the result . Was this the month the psychic said you would get pregnant?.
Very tired today, sickness getting worse and cyclizine not as helpful as it's been in the past. Hope to get some rest tomorrow though as working from home so this might improve things. I realise how fortunate I am to be even able to be in a position to moan about sickness - it still hasn't really sunk in yet.
Sorry not to do personals but am turning in for the night x

Notsoold, I'm sorry you didn't get more positive news on your scan, I very much hope everything is ok.

Morien, congratulations on the wedding. We, or rather I, started planning our wedding in the April and we got married four months later, so it is possible to do it quickly. We just didn't want to string it out, and I wouldn't have coped with interference pressure from our mums, especially MIL. We got married on a Friday, so that meant availability was better, but it was a reasonable sized (and priced) do. It's great you'd had a big chat with your DP, I hope all's well when you see the gynaecologist.

Diege, I'm so pleased you DH took the news of your pregnancy well, hopefully you can relax and enjoy it now.

Isabeller, when do you get the lump checked out? I know it must be really worrying, hopefully it'll be something minor.

Irish, your Belgian trip sounds really good. I hope you're feeling ok, you're right, it is very different for men when it comes to having children, unfortunately.

Drwho, nice to see you.

Gum & green, good luck on your 2ww. Gum, your party at the weekend sounds great, even if you did suffer for it the next day!

Calibee, I hope you enjoy your London trip. I tend to be a bit jaded about it cos I work there. If you are going by train, you can get some 2-for-1 deals on some attractions. www.daysoutguide.co.uk/2for1-london, but you do need the train ticket. And I'm sure you know this, don't pay for individual tube fares as they're ridiculously expensive, get travelcards instead. I know exactly what you mean about making phone calls at work, ours is so open plan, there's nowhere to go to make any kind of private call. Also the mobile reception is useless in most parts of the building unless you're on the "preferred supplier's" network, not good at all if you don't qualify for a work phone - and most of us don't.

JBrd, sounds like you're enjoying Center Parcs!

Hi to soopermum. Calendargal, how are you doing?

I've had a rotten cold over the past few days, having not really shaken the previous one, such that I had to take Monday off to lie about on the settee. It did me good though. No improvement with DH, he's barely speaking to me again. He came in to say good bye this morning, and just said see you later - no kiss, no I love you, which immediately set me off crying again. We've always said "I love you" to each other every day, and now he hasn't said it for days so I'm left wondering whether he still does. I dragged my friend at work off for a chat at lunchtime yesterday, and while she's very excited for me about the pregnancy, she is very cross with my DH for reacting like this again. But she very sweetly offered to come to any appointments with me if I need her too.

Hi to anyone I've missed, enjoy the rest of Wednesday.

Thanks lizard some really useful stuff there. I already have my eye on The Londonpass but need to wait for Dp to be home to buy anything as he is paying....it may then be too late to get them sent so we will have to get them once we get there. I cant really see him liking any of the art galleries, and I have been. He has relatives in Ealing so he will probably take an afternoon and go and visit them, and as I wasnt mentioned in that visit I may well take myself to have a look at the Tate. The hotel is very near I think.

So pleased my car whizzed through its mot yesterday so serviced and done for another year and another £160 lighter. Raaaaa. Cant wait for some warmer days to get the old roof down and go for a long drive.

This af is better than expected...I thought it would be heavier than normal but so far so good.

Notsoold sorry to hear the results were mixed but firstly, good news it isn't an ectopic pregnancy -I know you were very scared about that. I know nothing of how these work but there are always variables in life so keep everything crossed and I hope it works out for you. I wouldn't suggest you try and relax (!!) but please take care of yourself.

Hopeful I know you would not be testing at 9DPO or squinting at angles to imagine see a line! Ludicrous suggestion! Hope you enjoy your acupuncture session. I couldn't have a session this cycle as she went on holiday right over the first two weeks of my cycle (how very inconsiderate of her?!!) She wants to see me on day 4 of my AF and just before ovulation so will give it a go next cycle (if I need it!) I am due to go for a big night out with girlfriends on Friday which would normally involve a few glasses of wine so I am using this as an excuse to test on Friday morning - just in case (I will be 11DPO then so not too ridiculous?) I have to say I am symptom free so I am not overly optimistic

calibee Your London trip sounds fabulous (despite living here I just don't ever do the attraction/sightseeing things - you will probably know more about it that I do!) Though you should go to the Tate Modern on the Southbank if you get the chance (free entry). Try Time out (www.timeout.com/london) or have a look at this for ideas (not sure what you like to do (www.londonpass.com/london-attractions/index.html?aid=26&gclid=CLmg2f_71bUCFcrHtAodfU0APQ). London is a great city for just wondering about in though. Glad you got a good deal on your hotel.