TTC after recent mc - Thread 2

BombasticP you can have 30 points for fruity dreams

Sorry for all the posts - on the app and you can't scroll down, and my memory's crap etc etc etc

James all very valid symptoms worth spotting - you get ten points for each. Especially vivid dreams, maybe 20 points for them - I quite miss them! 50 points for stabbing boob pains, unless cured by gaviscon

Fx for you!

So I now have both hands and a foot being held by you lovely ladies?! How else could I survive this.
I'll keep you posted x

Blol i'll take a foot. I do awesome foot massages (mum has just had a knee replacement and I'm being a dutiful daughter so have had lots of recent practice).

Good luck at the EPU Better to go and get checked out than sitting at home and worrying. Hopefully they'll be able to see something very positive and it'll put your mind at rest xxx

Have a scan 3pm today. I will let you know. Thanks for being so lovely x

james about 5dpo here I think hope as didn't use opk this month. Once again attempting to symptom spot non-existent symptoms. Convinced myself my boobs felt funny (they don't) and desperately trying to feel nauseous (I'm don't!). On the other hand, I've had some crazy weird dreams, some of which were very a little fruity. So who knows? Hoping so hard for good news this time, it's been a well and truly shitty 4 months waiting so far, but am struggling to convince myself to be positive tbh. FX for you, boob pain sounds hopeful!

Blol I think you've run out of free hands but there's a spare one here in case you need it!

I don't know if I've congratulated all the BFP girls, if I've missed anyone then congratulations and fx for sticky beans all round!

anda hooray for PMT!

Right, off to walk the dog. Brrrrrrr. On the bright side, good opportunity to see if boobs notice the cold

Hey y'all, happy Monday. Today is a new day.

Oooh symptom spotting James I like it! Any other symptoms to report? Keep us posted! Everything crossed for you.

BLol Sorry you're struggling still. After all my positivity the last week or so, I had a major wobble yesterday due to stabby pains that developed into moderate cramps that lasted on and off all day. It is SO hard to push worries to the back of your mind.

Great that your GP is being sympathetic, tho sucks that previous mc not recorded. Will they amend that? And, even though it's scary to go back to EPU, at least you're in the best possible environment. Stay positive hun, we're here on standby.

At the doctors. She referred me to EPU as she said I look anxious (no shit!) and am having some ovulation pain so it's better to check it out.
I'm disgusted my notes don't show I had mc last time.
I'm scared to go back to that place but I suppose its a good thing.

Hi folks, hope you're all doing ok. 8dpo here, been symptom spotting but they were things like vivid dreams, sore throat, tiredness etc. I thought "I'm so not pregnant this month" and then earlier I suddenly got a massive sharp stabbing pain for 2-3 seconds in my left boob, which I dont usually get in run up to af, so now I don't know what to think. I'm lying here with vague heartburn, just wondering... Wondering...

Keep going, you will get there. A friend has just managed to get through 12 weeks after 5 previous mc. It can happen and does, so no reason why this one shouldnt be yours :)

Completely agree on lack of control! That's what was stressing me about no af, I didn't know where I was!

Blunder, I measured from erpc, as tht was the only definite I knew. Mc started over a week before that, and bleeding never really stopped. I had been told 4 to 6 weeks, and that ties in exactly. Fx for you soon. X

It turns out I'm 5 weeks today and not yesterday. On that note, what pregnancy tracker app do you girls use? That's what got me confused yesterday!
Almond have you decided what to do?
Good news for blunder and pink. I think your bodies are moving on from mc!
I'm a planner too and hate not being in control. That's why this is so hard.
Well no twinges today. I know the next two weeks will be hell and I will need lots of hand holding!

I was going to ask about dates pink, still wasn't clear whether to measure from ERPC or from end of bleeding so that's really useful.

Hooray for af and pmt, this month only!

coke I am the same exactly, so I can understand your sentiments. If there is a next time I will be very much waiting for the next milestone- digi tests 1 2 and 3, early scan etc etc. will be hard, as I am a planner too, but too much crap has for wrong recently to get that excited!

Ooh just read that back, I am positive really! It's not meant to sound as miserable as it does, just tht I understand where you are coming from :)

On the plus side, next milestone arrived yesterday. 5 wks 1 day after erpc (for anyone interested in dates!) af arrived. Yay.

Ooooh, just thought. Maybe maudlin-ness wasn't wine related but PMT related. There's a happy thought

blunder thanks! Looking back that was really maudlin. That's what happens when I have a glass of wine after a booze less period! I think, like lol (if there's a next time) I'll be measuring in milestones. I am by nature, a very optimistic person, and a massive planner so I just need to temper that a bit.

Really tricky almond. Presumably any elbow in the tummy would have to be so low down to actually go near the bean at this time, it's pretty unlikely that it would get whacked. I know one of the reasons also to be careful is because your ligaments will be looser and stretching (or whatever they do) and you're more likely to get injured yourself. And of course there is the 'what if' side of it, is it best to try to remove those things that you might blame if it didn't work out. Obviously that could be a bit of a slippery slope but some activities are going to get you bumped about and they're bound to be the ones you blame like andadietcoke says.

for anda. Yes the next pg will be different, but perhaps the healthy beautiful baby that you do have will be so so precious to you, there might even be a positive in there as well? Its what I'm trying to tell myself anyway!

Almond if it's just one match I'd be tempted to skip out on it, just in case you're bashed around at all! I think the official line is the carry on as you were though, but if they're a vicious team...

I don't know. It goes against my belief system to advocate changing your lifestyle but I've been having similar thoughts about skiing in February and I might not even be pg then! I just know I would struggle to come to terms with another mc if it followed a tumble on the slopes.

Every time someone has told me 'you can try again' I've wanted to add 'but I will never feel that happy about being pregnant, ever again'. I will never plan so far ahead again, I will never 'unknow' all the things that can go wrong, I will never expect that everything will be okay. And I will never do those things because I'm protecting myself, messtins you're so right, and thank you for sharing xx

I think it's very hard to feel the same unequivocal positivity about a pregnancy after you've suffered a MC. I never really bonded with my second son all the way through the pregnancy after I'd MC - so different to my first pregnancy which was emotionally straightforward. It did then affect how I felt about him when he was born. The bond with him was much more of a slow burn, a car crash birth and a very difficult first 6 months really didn't help. However, I think I coped much much better with 2nd MC for deliberately not having bonded with the baby or thought too far into the future - it was still shit, but I haven't had the emotional fall out to the same extent this time. I think you protect yourself however you can.

Almond if I were you I'd ask your gp or the actual trainer? I'm very cautious though.
I'm in a similar boat. I do Zumba and ballroom/ Latin dancing 4 times a week in total and I'm scared of getting to tired. I'll aka gp on Monday and see what she says.

Clairey it was 45 days for me from the end of natural mc to AF. Felt a long time but she appeared eventually!

Lol glad your feeling more positive! We're all in this together .

So, can I have some advice? I play for a netball team. I played a match today as I thought I would see how I feel. I felt fine physically but did have a worry in the back of my mind that I might get an elbow in the tummy (didn't). Anyhow we have 1 more training session and 1 more match next Sat before the Crimbo break and thought I would tell the Captain after Christmas (if all went well). But I'm not sure whether to play next week as It's a tough match against a feisty team. Part of me is thinking 'lots of people play sport when in early pregnancy' and the other part is 'what if I inadvertently cause a problem'. What do you guys reckon???

I can see both sides regarding bonding/ not bonding with bump. I do think its a protection thing in case it goes wrong.
Well DH gave me a lovely cuddle this morning and told me not to be scared. That felt lovely.
I feel positive today and even daring be a little happy

Hello all.

Firstly the important news- have you all seen the Scottish smileys?!
[bsmile] [bwink] [bbiscuit]

Gotta love a biscuit in a hat.

Secondly clairey my epu said 4-6 weeks too, not sure if that is from ERPC date or end of bleeding though. I guess supposedly from ERPC.

kittens, hello lovie! Nice to see you, and what a lovely thought popping back with some reassuring news to your friends. I get the feeling we're all very much trying to see the positives here at the mo.

kitty, sorry I didn't wait! I totally felt the same about using condoms now I just wanted a shag! so it's not exactly ttc at this point.

anda come on af you witch

brie-, I've been thinking a lot about what you're saying. I didn't bond at all with bean last time. I was very much staying philosophical and distant as I knew it might go wrong. Something another MNer said to me, and now this, makes me really wonder whether that was for a reason- not getting attached because something really was wrong. I don't usually believe in too much of that sort of thing but perhaps I was being protected by feeling this way. We'll see I guess if I get pg again, maybe I'll feel different, or maybe I'll just always be a bit distant at that phase. Either way I really understand what you mean about you wanting to love and care for your baby bean and I think it's lovely that you are thinking like that.

Waffle over.

also blol i guess twinges more on one side would be expected if that's the side of the womb that the egg has implanted on... just thinking aloud again :)

good luck for an answer one way or the other clairey :)

brie i know what you mean - but all the worry is because of love and It's very apparent how happy and thankful you all are for your tiny babies :)