TTC first child, anybody else in the same boat? Thread 2

So BFN at 11dpo on an Internet cheeeepy for me today - its managed to burst my optimistic bubble somewhat, I've been the opposite of you Janey and feeling uncharacteristically hopeful this month.

Off on hols tmw - weather looking pretty ropey unfortunately. Ah well, it'll be nice to spend some time with DP at least, and drink lots of nice wine /eat oysters if I am not up the duff.

So I find out a girl at work is pregnant then go on Facebook to find tgat another is a day past her due date and another friend has posted the pictures of the nursery for number two.

Grrrr

Fay I'm with the others - I'd wait a year (I'm 32).

I'm feeling positive for this month. We've done everything we could.

Fay - according to the NHS you should go (ie they will bother to refer you) if you're over 30 and have been trying for more than a year. If you're 35 or over you should apparently go if you've been trying for more than six months. Both my cousin who's a GP and my friend who's just been referred have confirmed this is their policy I think...

Strangely I genuinely feel like I have absolutely no hope of being pg this month for some reason. I've no idea why but I just don't feel it?! No symptom spotting at all, and just feel it wasn't my month, despite doing the deed at the right time this month (I think). I wonder why that is?

And yes, every other bugger is pg. Great.

Fay, I would say it's not so much about the age but how long you have been trying. If it's been a year and nothing happens, I would certainly get checked out.

Zombies, my DH is now obsessed, keeps reading the pregnancy book and telling me what is going to happen and what I am supposed to do and not to do. I can already tell that he will be a total PFB parent..

Everyone and their neighbour (or daughter!) IS up the duff!
To all those whose DHs or DPs think these forums are full of obsessed women, I say there's nothing wrong with a little obsession. I've reached 32 without having a child and I daresay I've done a good job of prioritising work and everything else in life before this so it's my time now. Plus the biological imperative to reproduce is very strong. So many animals in the animal world die after procreating- their only focus in life being to propagate their species. Not saying we are the same or should be, but if you feel the urge, it's because there is a primeval reason for it.
QLB since most of my "symptoms" could be put down to general exhaustion, and I had a good lie on on Saturday, I'm sorry to report there are no twangy uteri (?) :) here anymore.

Hang in there every one, our turns must come, just need to keep all them positive thoughts high on the list.

A general question,,,,,
at round about what age, would you think, it's time to stop trying naturally, and see if the hospitals can help mother nature along?
I just turned 31 last week, and I can't help feeling that the time is passing by, faster than I want it to.
I liked being "30" I felt good, but now, another year on, and suddenly, 31 sounds old to me, and I need to start making more plans to get pregnant.
Talking to DH, he said we should wait no longer than the end of this year, as he is also getting older, and he want to run around and play football, should we have a DS, and to also see our DD married, should we have girl.
He is quite a bit older than me, and I understand him very well.

Fay.

My cousin was a grandmother at 36, which in turn made her mother a great-grandmother at 52!

I found out today that one of my best childhood friends who is same age as me (36) is going to become a Grandmother as her 20 year daughter is pg! So its everyone and their daughters being pregnant :-(

bunnygirlie I am tempted to start talking to DH about CM etc. until he begs me to go back to the forums. I agree that it relieves the pressure so much to know that others are in the same boat.

And yes everybody else is PG! My Sis has her 12 week scan tomorrow, my Sis-in-Law gave birth a few weeks ago. Even my mate from work who didn't ever want children has managed to get caught by accident and is 20 weeks It will soon be our turn

I think if I didn't have the support from theses forums over that past year and a bit I would have good loopy.

Yes everyone is either pregnant or has just had a baby.

My husband also thinks it would be better for me to stop reading forums! I can see where he's coming from, but I'm not going to.

bunnygirlie around 8 women from my work have given birth in the last 6 months! I feel left out!

Pipersouth my DH thinks that these forums are completely cuckoo and frequented only by cuckoo women who are obsessed with getting pregnant (obviously myself included). I have told him I will respectfully take his views on board while at the same time completely ignoring them. What would a man know? The Human race would have been extinct ages ago if they had to get pregnant. Of course we're going to get "fixated by it all," it's a massive life-changing event

Hi Everyone sorry had to dip back out again after finding you all but dh was worried I would get fixated about it all as if that hadn't happened already! Only on Cycle 3 with AF due around 12th Oct(ish) with fingers crossed for me and everyone else it is nice not be alone with the worries and hopes :-)

No, not anywhere near Paris, I live in Alsace. Would not call it glamourous, but I do like it here.

Hi hazle. Think uk folic is 400.
I bought some nhs type tests from amazon. I've no idea how sensitive they are. Didn't really like the actual test. Still have 4 left and also have cb at home but don't want to waste it.
Do u live in Paris? How glamorous

what tests are you using Lol, any of the early ones? Many regular ones are not that sensitive.

Just discovered something funny here - bought some pre-natal vitamins from the states that have 800 mcg folic acid that they claim is 100% of the RDA. And have some local (French) ones that have 400, but claim it to be 200% of RDA. So French women need 4 times less folic acid when TTC? Ok, an average French woman is probably smaller than a US one, but not 4 times smaller. How about the UK ones, what's the folic acid dosage?

Hold out Lol! You're still in the game!

Had bfn this morning. Still no af, now one day late. Very confusing and frustrating?
Is anyone else in limbo land with me?
I might be earlier than I think as I know cycle can become longer after mc. Still a tiny bit of hope ...

That can be hard (the other people getting pg thing). Weirdly not that many of my close female friends have kids yet (though most of DP's do). When my younger sister got pg last year accidentally i got a lot of misplaced sympathy which made me a bit cross - actually I was just really pleased for her and excited about being an auntie! I've got one friend who is now also TTC, and I'm sure whoever get pg first, the other will be really pleased and a tiny bit jealous! I don't want to bemoan my lot though - I have two other close friends my age who aren't in relationships and I know have pangs of envy for those of who are and a real fear of getting left on the shelf. I suppose all I am saying is it is hard to keep it all in perspective and not compare, isnt it?

Zombie how's your twinge bingo today?

Still stuck at the top of the list, 2 bfn's, wishing af would get here so we can get on with the next cycle.

Been catching up on all your posts - 20% chance of conceiving each month- depressing!! All my friends have conceived in the first few month of trying, one accidentally with one dtd in a 4 month period and then 1st month FTC for her 2nd.

Although I don't feel old at 35 one of one of my friends children is now 10! Been waiting for the right man for years!!

Find it really frustrating you just don't know what's going on inside, do you just need to be patient or could something be wrong etc

bunny find it really hard a) not drinking and b) hiding not drinking - feel like everyone is watching me (known for enjoying a drink). Bridesmaid has just announced she is pregnant - she was thinking of trying this year but hadn't started- got pregnant by accident using the withdrawal method!!!! Had dreams of us being pregnant together, happy for her she's lovely, but when I really want it too feel :(

Hi Fay, of course the more the merrier, add yourself to the list!

I know what you mean Bunny - not so much with my close friends though, who are all Elderberrys and either have 1 child or haven't managed to have any. But whenever I see some families out and about where parents only fight and scream at their kids (or read some horror stories of neglected kids), then I do wonder how it's fair that those people have DC and we don't.

But life's not fair, is it..